If you’re thinking, “My girlfriend wants to go out alone with her friends” and are now asking, “Should I be worried?” or “Should I stop her?” the answer is that it depends.
If she is untrustworthy and has been openly flirting with other guys in front of you lately, then she may end up giving out her phone number, kissing a guy or even sleeping with him if she goes out alone with her friends.
On the other hand, if your girlfriend is trustworthy, most of her female friends are in relationships and they simply want to have a girl’s night for once, then you should trust her.
If you don’t give her that trust, she will lose respect and attraction for you because you will be coming across as insecure. Women are naturally attracted to and respectful of men who are confident and secure in who their attractiveness to women.
5 Questions You Should Ask Yourself About Your Girlfriend and Your Relationship With Her
Before you talk to your girlfriend about the possibility of her going out without you around, ask yourself the following questions…
1. Is she an honest, loyal trustworthy woman, or have you caught her lying to you many times before?
You can never fully trust a woman in a relationship, but if you want the relationship to mature and reach its true potential, then you just have to give her your full trust.
If you don’t, the relationship will get stuck in the early stages, she will lose respect and attraction for you and it problems will begin to emerge.
If your girlfriend is a decent, trustworthy and loyal woman who has no difficulty saying “no” to men hitting on her, then you really have nothing to worry about when she goes out alone with her girlfriends.
In fact, it’s important that you give her your trust so that she can see that you are confident in her desire for you and her loyalty to you. She will be happy to see that you’re not worrying about her cheating on you every time she has a harmless hook up with her friends.
On the flip side however, if your girlfriend is a liar, enjoys flirting with other guys or has given you cause to doubt her loyalty to you, then obviously you’re not going to give her your full trust.
A woman who enjoys lying, flirting with other guys and being disloyal should be dumped and if you’re not dumping her, you should ask yourself why you’re prepared to put up with her bad behavior.
Could it be because you feel lucky to have scored with her and you doubt your ability to get another (even better) girlfriend than her?
If she can’t be trusted, then my advice to you is to dump her and then begin to move on without her. If that doesn’t teach her a lesson and make her change her ways, then she would have cheated on you anyway and it would have been you who was taught a horrible lesson by her.
On the other hand, if she can be trusted, you should let her go out alone with her friends, but only if it’s to catch up with her girlfriends who are already in relationships or to have a “once off” party night with her mix of single and taken girlfriends.
If she just wants to catch up with girlfriends who are in love with their boyfriend, fiancé or husband, then you’ve got nothing to worry about.
However, if she wants to go out and get wasted with her single girlfriends, then you have a valid reason to begin worrying that she might be thinking of straying.
2. Is she going out alone with her friends all the time, or is it an occasional thing?
Being in a relationship should only be a part of your life, not your whole life.
In other words, even though you and your girlfriend love, respect and adore each other, you don’t have to live in each other’s pockets 24/7 to prove your love and devotion for each other.
It’s perfectly normal and healthy in a relationship for both you and your girlfriend to have interests, hobbies and friends that apart from each other. There is nothing wrong with that and in fact, it can be good for you and your girlfriend to maintain some separate interests and relationships to keep a healthy balance in your life.
That will likely change if you get married, but if you’re just boyfriend and girlfriend and are still learning about life and wanting to feel free at times, you need to be able to give her that space to explore her thoughts and be around people without you sometimes.
This is why, if your girlfriend wants to go out alone with her friends occasionally, you should actually encourage her to do so.
Tell her, “Cool, have a great time. I’ll miss you, but I’m happy that you’re going to catch up with your friends and I hope you enjoy hanging out with them.”
Then, get on with doing whatever you are focused on achieving in life (e.g. passing your university course, building up your career or expanding your business).
Don’t sit around worrying what she might be thinking, feeling or doing when she’s not around you. Be a man and get on with moving forward in life when she’s not around. When she sees that you’re doing that, it will deepen her feelings of respect and attraction for you.
What if she goes out alone too often?
If going out alone has become something that she wants to do ALL the time, it could mean that she’s no longer feeling the way she wants to feel with you and she’s trying to distance herself from you and the relationship.
You will know if that is the case if she’s no longer very affectionate, doesn’t really care if you and her cancel plans on each other and is no longer telling you that she loves you and wants to be with you for life.
3. Is she going to places like coffee shops, restaurants or bookshops, or is she going out to nightclubs or bars?
When a woman is committed to a man and her relationship with him, she won’t feel the need to go out without him to nightclubs or bars and potentially put herself in a position where she will get hit on by other guys.
It just won’t be of interest to her.
Instead of getting attention from other men, she would prefer to be around her man or to spend time with her friends doing things that won’t expose her to being hit on by random guys.
For example: She will meet her friends at a coffee shop or restaurant, or they will meet at a friend’s house, go to the beach together, etc.
However, sometimes there are occasions when your girlfriend will have to go out on her own with her friends (e.g. a “girls only” birthday party catch up or a “bachelorette” party / hen’s night).
4. Are your girlfriend’s friends all women, or are there single guys in the group too?
It’s one thing if your girlfriend is hanging out with a group of female friends, but if her friends include single guys, then there’s a possibility that these guys may be interested in her.
A lot of guys don’t have the confidence to approach and pick up single women, so they often resort to trying to steal women from other guys, especially by using the “friends” approach.
A guy will hang around a married woman or a girl who has a boyfriend and he will act like he just wants to be friends. Yet, the entire time, he will trying every trick in the book to try to get her to like him and become open to leaving her guy for him, or at least having a fling.
Even if your girlfriend isn’t interested in any of the single guys right now, if she puts herself in a compromising position (e.g. like getting very drunk), she may end up kissing him or having sex with one of those guys at some point.
When a woman is in a committed relationship with her boyfriend and loves and respects him, she will not regularly hang out with other single men. It simply will not be of interest to her at all.
5. Do you and your girlfriend have a great relationship filled with mutual love, respect and attraction, or has your behavior been turning her off lately?
Have you been deepening the love, respect and attraction that your girlfriend feels for you?
Have you been giving your girlfriend the love and attention she needs in the relationship? Do you still hold hands, kiss and have sex like you did in the early days?
Does your girlfriend respect and love you as her man? Does she feel like a real woman (i.e. feminine, girly, proud to be your woman, safe and protected by you, etc) when she’s with you?
If the relationship that you and your girlfriend have is solid and if you are giving her what she needs, then there is absolutely no reason why she would be looking outside of the relationship.
So, you have nothing to worry about. She will stick by you and if she does make a mistake, then clearly she has stuffed things up with an awesome man. If you are able to make her feel the type of love, respect and attraction that a woman wants to feel in a relationship, then you are what women refer to as a “catch.”
However, if you’ve been unable to keep the spark alive and you pretty much “got lucky” when you met your girlfriend, you’re probably worried that another guy will make her feel more attraction than you do.
This is why it’s so important to be able to attract women when you first meet them (so you have your choice with women, rather than relying on getting lucky) and then deepen a woman’s attraction for you when in a relationship…
If you’re worried that she is going to meet another guy who makes her feel more attracted than you do, don’t let that show.
Rather than turning your girlfriend off with insecurity, you need to show her that you’re confident in yourself and believe in your sex appeal to her. If you don’t know how to make her feel a lot of attraction for you, then don’t shy away from learning about that.
Not every guy is an expert at attracting women, but you can learn how to do it. Some guys are naturals when it comes to women, but most guys need to learn a little or lot on the subject of attracting women.
Just make sure that you don’t become insecure about the idea of her potentially meeting a guy who makes her feel more than you do. If your girlfriend sees that you are insecure, she will naturally feel turned off by you.
When she goes out alone with her friends and happens to interact with other men who are more confident than you, she will actually begin to feel attracted to them.
Why? Women are attracted to the confidence and strength in men, so your insecurity and jealousy will look like a weakness to her and will begin to turn her off.
She will contrast how she is feeling around the new guy compared to you and she will realize that he is more of a match for her, mentally and emotionally.
Make Her Feel Lucky to Have You as Her Boyfriend
As a man, it is your responsibility (not the woman’s) to deepen the love, respect and attraction in your relationship. Most women wait for their man to lead the way to a better relationship and if he doesn’t, they become unhappy and look for ways to get out of it.
Rather than saying, “My girlfriend wants to go out alone with her friends,” and feeling like you’re losing her, work on deepening the attraction, love and respect that she feels for you.
When you do that, she will want to stay home with you because she’ll be afraid of losing you. She will want to show her commitment to you and ensure that other women can’t get access to you.