Is Your Relationship Built on Trust?

Without trust, a relationship simply cannot last.

A loving, lasting relationship is one that is built on a solid foundation of trust. Trusting each other in a relationship means feeling secure enough emotionally to be able to let your guard down and be your genuine self.

For both you and your girlfriend able to feel the same level of comfort in letting your guard down; you must both believe that your trust in each other will not be intentionally betrayed or taken advantage of. If either you or your girlfriend is afraid of opening up or afraid of being hurt, a trusting bond can never develop and the relationship will never become truly fulfilling for either of you. So, how do you build that trust?

Four Simple Steps to Building Trust

1.  Be Your True Self
Your girlfriend needs to be able to put her trust in you that you will be the man you truly are deep down. She must feel confident that she knows the real you and can count on you to always be the man she fell in love with. Trust can become an issue if you begin to say or do things that are way out of character (compared to how you were in the lust stage of the relationship) and such behavior inevitably leads to suspicion, the loss of intimacy and a breakdown of the relationship. However, this doesn’t mean that you can’t ever change. It’s only natural to find yourself changing as a man as you progress in your relationship and in life.

To avoid making your girlfriend feel suspicious or left out of your changing life, simply keep her informed of your motivations as you change as a person. For example, if she knows that you’re a bit of a couch potato and you suddenly decide to join a gym without mentioning anything to her, she might question your motives. She’s going to be left wondering why you didn’t tell her you were thinking of joining a gym and might suspect that you’re doing it to try and impress other women. If your motivation is to simply stay fit and feel better, just let her know.

2.  Make Sure Your Actions Match Your Words
If you say one thing to your girlfriend, but your facial expressions, tone of voice or body language are saying another, which version will she likely believe? To build trust, you must always say what you mean and mean what you say. If your actions don’t match your words, your girlfriend will feel that there’s always a part of you that can’t be trusted. If she feels that way, you can be sure that she might cheat on you one day because she’s worried you’ll eventually do it to her.

Making your actions, tone and body language match your words doesn’t mean that you should be hurtfully honest, but it does mean that you should always be truthful while being mindful of her feelings at the same time. Let’s say she has tried styling her hair a different way and asks for your opinion. You honestly don’t like it, but you don’t have to say so in a hurtful way; you can tell her that you prefer it a different way and give her positive reasons why, such as you like the way it exposes her neck and shows off her beautiful shoulders. If you say you like the new style but she senses from your tone that you don’t, you’ve allowed doubt to creep in and she’s now going to question how much she can really trust you. It may seem like a trivial issue, but if she can’t trust you to be truthful over little things, why should she trust you over bigger things?

3.  Be True to Yourself
Her trust develops when she can count on you being you, but to offer that her – you actually need to know who you are in the first place! This comes down to simply thinking about what you value in life, what your core values are and what you want out of life. Then, going after what you want in life with that as your fundamental base to everything.

When you are confident in who you are, what your values are and what’s important to you in your relationship and in life, it is easy for your girlfriend to trust in you as that man. Women are naturally attracted to confident men and it’s important to maintain that confidence as your relationship develops. As a man who knows what he wants and also has the self-confidence to stand up for what he believes in, you are a man that your girlfriend can put her trust in.

4.  Be Her Rock
The more reliable and dependable you are as a man in terms of your values and how you treat people, the more trustworthy you become. When your girlfriend can count on you to be there for her no matter what, you become her rock and she will feel safe and secure in the relationship. Being there for her means being supportive, but it doesn’t mean having to be in complete agreement with her all of the time.

By being a man who reliably stays calm and in control, you are able to say what’s on your mind or point something out without making a big deal of it. That way, you are someone whom your girlfriend can lean on in times of need and can also trust in to give her an honest opinion or advice on any matter. Being able to talk  openly with her about everything and anything is one of the foundations of a happy relationship.

Overall, to build trust in a relationship with a woman, you need to be a trustworthy man in terms of your character. Be the solid rock that she can lean on by knowing you who are, what you stand for and what you want from life. Let her be the one to go through emotional mood swings (women love to live like that), while you be the one who knows exactly what he wants and how he is going to achieve it. Your girlfriend or wife will learn to trust in your masculinity and will see you as the rock, the foundation and the strength in her life.