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How to talk to women

To avoid the conversation turning into a boring "interview", you need to include flirting and talk in an open, unrestrained manner.

Do you run out of things to say to women? Do you sometimes find it difficult to keep a conversation going and keep it interesting with a woman you've just met?

These days, a lot of guys are unsure how to talk to women and often ask me, "What do you say after you say hello to keep the conversation going?" Usually after a guy has introduced himself, he only has a few more things to say before the conversation dries up and the woman begins to lose interest. He then begins to feel nervous and the woman notices and loses even more interest in him.

Common Mistakes

When a guy is unsure how to talk to women, he usually makes one or more of the following mistakes.

  1. Sticks to safe, boring conversations: Instead of cracking a few casual jokes, flirting or just talking about anything and everything like he would when chatting with friends, he turns conversations with women into boring interviews. "So, what do you do?", "What do you study?", "Do you come here often?" , "Where are you from?" A woman can only assume that if your conversation with her is boring, a relationship with you will probably be too. When talking to women, make sure that you include humor and flirting with your conversation. Without it, you'll just come across as another boring guy who is too afraid to loosen up and chat with her in a fun, interesting way.
  2. Mistakenly thinks that he has to impress women during conversation: The fact is, women hate it when you try to impress them during a conversation because it shows that you feel unworthy. One of the most important lessons you need to learn about how to talk to women is to get her trying to impress you. That way, she will do most of the talking, she'll laugh at all your jokes and will be more eager to listen to what you have to say.
  3. Hides behind overly polite conversation: A guy will usually do this because he fears that any flirtatious or risque conversation may cause the woman to slap him or reject him! Women rarely slap guys they don't know - I've personally never seen it happen and I've been teaching clients how to approach women (in real life situations) for 6 years now. A guy getting slapped or getting a drink tipped over his head for cracking jokes or asking a woman out only happens in the movies. In real life, women want to have fun and interesting conversations and are not interested in guys who act as though they are super polite and super nice. So, don't hide behind overly polite conversation - be yourself, relax and just chat freely and openly. It is much more attractive to women because it demonstrates confidence and honesty.
  4. Is afraid to express himself in an emotional way in fear of being judged or embarrassed: Women are more attracted to men who are confident enough to express their opinions and emotions in a masculine way. An example of how to express yourself in an alpha male way that women find interesting is at the bottom of this article.

My Story: Learning How to Talk to Women

I can totally understand why guys make these mistakes when talking to women, because I used to be very much the same. I can still remember back to the horrible time in my life when I had NO IDEA how to talk to women. Even though I really, really wanted to have an interesting conversation with the women I'd meet, I usually would run out of things to say and they'd then get bored and lose interest in talking to me. The conversation would die anywhere between 15 seconds and 2 minutes. Following that, I'd feel down about it for days because I knew I was probably going to have to wait a long time until I had another opportunity to talk to another woman.

When I tried to talk to new women in bars or clubs, they'd usually walk away saying, "I have to go to the bathroom" only to never return! Like you, I started searching around for answers on how to talk to women. Yet, I couldn't find anything useful, so I decided to keep approaching women every weekend in bars and clubs until I worked out how to talk to women in a way that captured their interest in me and - most importantly- maintained their interest. After a lot of trial and error, I eventually developed my OWN conversation techniques that worked every time. I knew exactly how to talk to a woman in a way that sparked AND maintained her interest long enough for her to really get to know me and see the real me. Then, I improved the techniques so women started showing me loads of interest and began trying to pick ME up.

Today, I teach the techniques here at The Modern Man and can absolutely guarantee that when you learn from me - you will know exactly how to talk to women in a way that leads to sex, dates, love and relationships.

Example Conversation Technique

One of the techniques that I now use to keep conversations going and keep them interesting is technique that I call Talk From Your Own Perspective. This is where you offer some conversation from your personal perspective and then ask the woman a question on the same topic to bring her into the conversation. This works SO MUCH better than just asking a woman questions and not offering any personal opinions to the conversation yourself.

For example: Instead of asking her, "Do you like the beach?" you would first talk from your perspective by saying, "I love the beach...I've managed to get there twice this summer with some friends...ate too much ice-cream the last time I went! How about you, did you get to the beach much this summer?"


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6 Comments

  • sam  

    pls i need your advice, am 24yrs guy, i met my galfriend ayear ago and we have had good time together infact we look compatible. The problem now is that am broke graduate now and have poor familybackground,while she is 5month older,her family is okay. Should i let her no my poorbackground and does age difference matter? But i love her.

    Reply
    • Hi Sam

      Thanks for your question.

      Honesty is the best policy with women and in life. If you base your life on lies, you will have to use a lot of mental energy everyday just to keep the facade going. One of the fundamental principles for success with women is to BE REAL. You never need to lie to a woman to be successful in picking her up or having a relationship.

      I recommend you sign up to my newsletter and I will begin teaching you how to make this girl fall madly in love with you. Sign up here for free

      Cheers
      Dan

      Reply
  • Carlos  

    Hey there, Dan! How’s it going?
    Mate, I’m really excited right now as I’ve finally worked up the courage to approach some women in different eviroments and gotten them attracted to me. Even though I’ve got a long way to go, I can feel that this is getting easier and easier! I finally did it.
    So thanks Dan. These programs are literally changing my life!

    One question though: How do you manage the “shy” girls? I mean, lately I’ve talked to some “innocent-shy” type of girls, and whenever I flirt with them, they feel somehow intimidated. I can see they feel attraction for me, but how do I make them flirt back or something? Maybe making them more confortable around me? But how do I do that?

    Thanks in advance, mate.
    Keep up the good work! :D

    Reply
  • Knut  

    Hey, Dan.

    If your girlfriend complains about that you have nothing to talk about, and that she says she has more to talk about with a random guy in a club, than with you; then is that in reality caused by her not seeing you as a confident alpha-male anymore, and that she thereby lacks the need to impress you, by her not talking about a lot of things with you anymore?

    Because, girls who are sexually attracted to a guy, usually wants to impress that guy, and you can clearly tell that they’re giving an effort to keep the conversation going, by them laughing about every silly joke that the man makes, and them generally being open and talkative with the man.
    And in those situations, the man really doesn’t have to say all that much, or don’t have to have very interesting conversations, in order for the girl to find their conversation interesting.

    In short: If a girl is sexually interested, then she will think that their conversations are interesting no matter how few things they actually have to talk about?

    And if so, then: When a girlfriend is complaining to her boyfriend about them not having anything to talk about anymore – then are her REAL/UNDERLYING complaints actually about her not feeling sexually attracted to the guy anymore, and that she feels frustrated about that fact?

    And if so, then: I guess it doesn’t really matter if you don’t have much to talk about with your girlfriend – as long as she’s REALLY sexually attracted to you?
    Is that the answer? If not; then what IS the answer?

    This was a lot of text, so I hope you understand my questions in this big ocean of letters. (Because I may be overcomplicating my question here.)

    But anyway, thank you for reading this, and for answering my question in the best way you can.

    Reply
    • Hey Knut

      It comes down to a few things:

      1. Whether the man and the woman are compatible; emotionally and intellectually.
      2. Whether she is attracted to him.
      3. Whether she actually cares about him and loves him.
      4. Whether she respects what he has to say.

      Attraction will get you sex and a a bit of fun for a while, but for a lasting relationship you need compatibility, attraction, respect and love.

      Cheers
      Dan

      Reply

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