Here are 4 things you can do to get your wife back:
1. Refresh your understanding of what it takes to maintain a happy relationship
Couples who have been together for years and who are still completely in love with each other:
- Love and accept each other for who they are: They understand that no-one is perfect and accept that mistakes will happen sometimes. When a mistake is made, they are patient with each other, while the person who messed up makes an effort to change and improve. This might sound idealistic or even impossible to some men, but it’s how happy, loving relationships are. I know that because I’m happily married and I’ve helped many men to achieve the same with their wife.
- Always strive to improve and become better for each other: Happy couples understand that when you love someone, you want to be the best person you can be for them. You do that because you love them, love yourself and love and appreciate the amazing relationship you have.
- Support each other emotionally: Whether it’s to help each other through a difficult time, or to pursue a big goal or dream, they are there for each other no matter what. What is most important to them as a couple is that both of them feel good, enjoy life and get to experience and achieve what they want.
- Don’t take things too seriously: In happy, long-lasting relationships, laughter really is the best medicine. Rather than getting upset over everything and making a big drama about it (which can then lead to arguments, anger and a buildup of resentment), a happy couple will turn an emotionally charged situation into something that they can laugh about together. This does take some practice, but it really does work. You get into the habit of not getting into wars with each other over trivial things and instead, laughing about it all and enjoying each other’s company as you go through the events of daily life.
- See each other as being more than enough: Naturally, there are other attractive people in the world, but a happy couple doesn’t feel like they’re missing out by not hooking up with those people. Instead, they feel lucky to have each other and no matter how beautiful another woman is, in his eyes, a man’s wife is the most beautiful woman in the world to him. Likewise, she looks at him as being the man that she only has eyes for.
So, if you regret divorcing your wife, decide now that you are going to quickly get prepared to re-attract her and have an even better relationship with her this time around.
If you do that, you will not only turn yourself into an even better man than you already are and be so much happier with yourself, but you will make her happy and make her feel lucky and grateful that you have come back into her life.
So, if you are up for getting her back…
2. Get ready to re-attract her when you interact with her
One of the best ways to re-attract your wife when you interact with her again, is by shocking her (in good way), by being a new and improved man.
For example: If one of the main reasons for your divorce was due to you being too emotionally closed off, to convince your wife that you’ve changed, you need to take the risk of being more fearless with your emotions.
Important: I don’t mean that you should become a sensitive wussy or anything like that.
I’m talking about being fearless with your emotions like a man (i.e. maintaining your composure and masculinity, while also expressing some emotions without fearing the consequences).
Having the guts to say something like, “I’m happy to see you. You look amazing” rather than being closed up emotionally and saying, “Hey, how are you doing? You look nice.”
Of course, if you go from being an emotionally closed up man to being emotionally fearless, she might be a bit confused initially and wonder if it’s real, or if you’re just putting on a bit of an act initially.
So, she might test you by saying something like, “Hey, I just want to be clear that we’re only meeting up as friends today. I’m happy to see you, but don’t get the wrong idea.”
If you then react by clamming up and thinking to yourself, “I knew I shouldn’t have exposed my feelings to her like that. Look where that got me… she rejected me and threw it in my face. It was a big mistake,” she’ll know that you were only opening up emotionally to hopefully impress her, but haven’t sincerely become emotionally fearless.
An emotionally fearless man would laugh at what she said and say something like, “Don’t get the wrong idea? Who said that we weren’t meeting up as just friends? You’re the one thinking other things” and then have a laugh with her about that.
In other words, he doesn’t let her take control of the situation by making it out as though he is hoping to score with her.
Instead, he turns it back on her by saying something like, “Of course. We’re just meeting up as friends. Don’t get the wrong idea. I know I look handsome today, but my body is off limits. You can look, but don’t touch” and then have a laugh with her about that.
Another example is if your wife divorced you because she felt you were taking her for granted.
Although at the beginning of your relationship you were very loving and attentive, over time you fell into the habit of putting other things first in your life, ahead of your relationship with her (e.g. work, bills, your family, friends, hobbies, procrastination).
To show your wife that you’ve changed and won’t fall into that trap again, you need to focus on making her feel loved and appreciated all the time.
When she can see that you really have changed, her guard will naturally come down and she will open up to the idea of giving your marriage another chance.
Once you’ve prepared yourself to re-attract her, you need to…
3. Contact her to say hi and focus on re-attracting her
When you feel ready, make contact with your wife and start making her feel sexually and romantically attracted to the new and improved you.
For example: If you’ve been texting each other from time to time, you should now proceed to getting her on a phone call with you to say hi.
Once on the call, make sure that you add in some humor to ease the tension between you and her and make her feel happy and relaxed to be talking to you again.
For example: You might call her and say something like, “Hey Michelle, I thought I’d just call and say hi. How’s your day going today?”
If things are still quite awkward between you and her, she might start off by being cold and aloof towards and say something like, “Fine,” or “Okay…nothing special.”
You can then use that as an opportunity to make her laugh and feel attracted, by saying something like, “Mmy day has been great so far and it’s about to get 100 times better.”
She’ll likely then ask, “Why?” and you can then say, “Well, I’m about to arrange a catch up for a coffee with a really beautiful woman.”
If she thinks that you’re talking about another woman, she might get annoyed at you and say something like, “Why are you calling me to tell me that? Do you think I care who you’re dating? Well, I don’t!”
You can then say, “Well you should care. You’re that beautiful woman and I’d like to ask you to catch up for a coffee this week to say hi as friends,” and laugh with her about that.
She will then laugh about getting caught out with your joke and may also feel flattered that you still think of her as a beautiful woman.
As a result she will begin to wonder what has brought about such a sudden change in you.
She will feel curious about your newfound relaxed, confident and emotionally strong attitude towards her, which will naturally make her feel some respect and attraction for you again.
When that happens, she then opens herself up to the idea of talking to you again and seeing you in person.
Note: Most women are savvy enough to know that you’re talking about them when you say that you’re about to arrange a catch up for coffee with a beautiful woman.
If your wife gets the joke right away because she’s a bit savvier than the average girl, you can then say, “So, let’s catch up for a coffee sometime this week to say hi as friends.”
By the way…
If you’ve had no contact with your wife since the divorce, you can text her or send her a private message via social media, or start a text conversation on the phone.
However, before you do that, I recommend that you use the techniques from my program to warm her up first. For more information, check out Get Your Ex Back Super System.
Once you’ve broken the ice…
4. Get her to meet up with you to say hi as friends
After you’ve reactivated some of your ex wife’s feelings of respect and attraction for you (i.e. by making her smile, laugh and feel good to be talking to you again on a phone call), ask her to meet up with you in person.
For example: You can say, “It’s good to see that we can be still be mature adults and have a chat” and let her say whatever she wants to add to that.
Then say, “Let’s catch up for a coffee sometime this week. Of course, it wouldn’t be about us getting back together. It would just be a relaxing cup of coffee to say hi to each other as friends.”
In some cases, an ex-wife won’t immediately say, “Yes” because she will be worried about having feelings for her ex-husband again, even though he hasn’t fully changed.
So, she might say something like, “Look, it’s nice of you to ask, but I don’t think it’s such a good idea. We’re divorced now, so let’s leave it at that.”
No matter what she says, maintain your confidence and don’t fall into the trap of doubting yourself and your ability to seduce her back into a relationship.
Relax and confidently say something along the lines of, “Hey, look – it’s just a quick cup of coffee as friends. I know that we’re divorced and I accept that completely. Yet, even though we aren’t together anymore, we can at least catch up to say hi once as friends. So, what do you say? Are you in for a quick catch up tomorrow or the next day?”
At that point, she will probably agree and you can then go ahead and arrange a suitable day and time.
Just remember: When you meet up with her, you must be ready to say and do the types of things that will reawaken her sexual and romantic feelings for you (e.g. maintain your confidence around her regardless of her attitude towards you, ease the tension by making her laugh and smile, let her see some of the changes in your behavior and attitude that were lacking in the marriage), so she naturally begins to open up to the idea of getting back together again.
4 Mistakes to Avoid Making if You Want to Get Your Wife Back
If you want to ensure that you get your ex wife back, be sure to avoid the following 4 common pitfalls:
1. Thinking that it’s not possible to get her back
Sometimes, when a guy regrets divorcing his wife, he might start thinking things like, “I screwed the whole damn thing up. I let the divorce go through and now it’s over. It’s all my fault. I’ve lost her forever. Even though I now realize that I love her and she’s the only woman I want to spend the rest of my life with, there’s nothing I can do about it. We’re divorced. No one gets back together after a divorce. It’s done. I can’t do anything now. We signed the papers. The papers mean everything.”
Paper is just paper.
It seems fancy because there are lawyers involved, but what you need to understand is that when your ex wife feels a renewed sense of respect, sexual attraction and love for you, those divorce papers will become meaningless.
What happened in the past will seem like a mistake and she will realize that you and her are supposed to be together.
She will rationalize the divorce as something that needed to happen, so you would change and become the man you are today.
You and her are meant to get back together.
2. Feeling unworthy of her
When a man feels like he is to blame for the divorce, he might fall into the trap of thinking of his ex-wife as being a perfect angel who didn’t do anything wrong at all.
Before the divorce, all he could see were her faults (e.g. she was a nag, she was always throwing tantrums, she created drama over insignificant things to annoy him, she didn’t give him enough time on his own to do his own thing), but now all he can see is how perfect she really was for him (e.g. she was beautiful, she was supportive of his dreams, she took good care of him and their home, she put up with his bad attitude).
As a result, he then starts to put himself down in comparison to her, “How could I have been so blind not to see that the problem in our relationship was me? She was perfect and it was me who messed everything up. I’m such a loser…why am I like this? Why do I ruin relationships with people who love me? What is wrong with me? Even if she wanted me back, the truth is, I don’t deserve a woman like her. She’s just too good for me.”
Yet, what he doesn’t realize is that feeling unworthy of his wife’s love only makes him seem less attractive to her (and to other women).
A woman likes being envied by other women by being in a relationship with a man who is always confident and believes in himself no matter what happens.
The more emotionally strong her man is, the more she is able to respect him, feel attracted to him, love him and feel proud to be with him.
So, when a guy is feeling sorry for himself and putting himself down, rather than make her feel happy that he values her more than he values himself, she feels turned off by his lack of confidence.
3. Not improving his ability to make her feel sparks of sexual and romantic attraction during an interaction
Where many ex-husbands go wrong is that they make promises to change, suck up to their ex wife by being extra nice or pour their heart out and explain how much they regret the divorce.
None of that means much to a woman if you first don’t reactivate her feelings of sexual and romantic attraction.
You have to do that first, otherwise your attempts to get her back will seem selfish and one-sided.
Here’s the thing…
Right now, your wife has likely disconnected with her feelings for you and is working on completely getting over you and moving on with her life.
If you want to stop her in her tracks and get her to turn around and come back into your life, you have to focus on making her feel rushes of sexual and romantic attraction when you interact with her.
Don’t try to get her back by promising to change, being really nice or seeking pity from her.
Those approaches don’t work.
Likewise, just being a neutral friend doesn’t work either.
You have to get the spark back between you and her and then turn it into a passionate fire of love.
That might sound difficult to you, but really – it’s one of the easiest and most fun things you will ever do in your life.
Reawakening a woman’s feelings after a break up or divorce and the reconciling is enjoying for you and her.
Finally, another mistake to avoid if you regret divorcing your wife and want her back is…
4. Waiting for years in the hope that she comes back on her own
Sometimes, a man might wait around for months or even years for his ex wife to forgive him and realize her mistake.
Yet, he then watches on in disappointment as she moves on and seems happy and content without him.
So, if you want your ex wife back, don’t waste anymore time hoping that she will come back on her own.
If she hasn’t come back on her own by this point, she probably won’t ever come back.
Instead, she will move on without you.
If you want her back, you have to step up and make it happen.