5 things you should do now:
1. Decide whether or not it was completely her fault
It’s only natural that if your ex girlfriend got you fired, you would be currently feeling a range of negative emotions (e.g. angry about what she did, stressed about having to now find a new job, betrayed by the woman you thought you knew).
What has happened to you isn’t a nice thing to be going through.
However, before you do anything else, it’s very important that you get to the bottom of what really happened and why.
Although you might feel justified in blaming your ex girlfriend for everything and thinking something like, “It’s all her fault! She was being a complete bitch about our break up, which is why she got me fired,” it might be possible that you are also partially responsible for what happened.
For example: Ask yourself the following questions…
- Did you create too much drama at work after being dumped (e.g. by telling all your co-workers what happened and then forcing them to pick sides, badmouthing her to her colleagues or to management)?
- Did you threaten to cause problems for her (e.g. by spreading rumors about her character, releasing nude photos, telling people her secrets, ruining her reputation)?
- Did you interfere with her ability to get her work done (e.g. by following her around and trying to get her to talk to you, pleading with her to give you another chance in front of her colleagues, sending her loads of emails to hopefully get her to change her mind)?
On the other hand, was it all her fault?
- Were you completely professional and didn’t do anything wrong, but she went and spread lies about you or told management that you were threatening her, even though you weren’t?
- Was she bitter about the break up and then sought revenge by getting you fired?
- Did she create drama in the workplace and drag you into it?
- Did she start crying and looking helpless in front of others, to make you seem like a bad ex boyfriend who was harassing her, even though you weren’t?
Here’s the thing…
If you were partly to blame for what happened, you might want to apologize for your part in it and get her to forgive you, so you can then begin to re-attract her and get her back (if you want to).
Alternatively, if you feel that it was all her fault, you can then decide to…
2. Get revenge by getting a better job
If getting fired was your ex girlfriend’s fault, then letting it get you down will only cause her to win.
Don’t give her the satisfaction.
Rise above the circumstances that she has pushed you into, by getting an even better job than you had before.
Rather than letting the event of getting fired hold you back or take you down, use it as a stepping stone to better yourself and rise up even higher in life.
Do whatever it takes to find yourself an even better job than before (e.g. at a company that your ex girlfriend always wanted to work for, with more pay and with better perks) and then make sure that she finds out about it.
- Post about it on social media where you know she will probably see it, “Very happy with my new job. I’m now working at _____ and it’s the best. Great times ahead!”
- Tell previous co-workers about it, so they can spread the gossip to her.
- Tell mutual friends and let her find out about it eventually.
When she finds out, not only will she be annoyed that her plan to hurt you backfired, but she will also feel attracted to you (of course, she probably won’t admit that) for being an emotionally strong, confident man who doesn’t lose it when things get rough.
You rise up to the occasion and come through as an even better man than before.
When she realizes that you’re risen up to the challenge and are loving your new life, she may then start wondering things like, “Why was I such a bitch to him? What was I thinking? He’s not a loser. I’m the loser. Why did I get him fired? Will he ever forgive me for what I did?” and she might then try to contact you to rekindle things between you and her.
You can then decide if you want her back, or if you’d prefer to move on and find a new woman.
3. Get ready to re-attract her if you want her back
Based on what happened between you and your ex, it’s almost certain that there’s probably not a lot (or any) remaining feelings of respect, attraction and love between you.
To re-spark those feelings, you need to make sure that every time you interact with her from now on, you make her smile, laugh and feel good to be talking to you again.
You want her to be thinking, “This feels so good. I can’t believe we had so much drama before. He’s so different from the person he used to be. Why did I get him fired? That was a mistake. I was just being stupid. I feel so drawn to him now. I want him back. Will he give me another chance?”
How can you do that?
By changing the things about you that caused her to break up with you in the first place, so she will encounter a very different man from the one she knew before.
If you allowed her to dominate you emotionally and boss you around in the relationship, you now laugh at her when she gets pushy and you say things like, “Hey, stop being such a control freak. I can make up my own mind about things, thank you very much!” and have a laugh with her about it.
Alternatively, you can say, “Well, someone’s a Little Miss Bossy today, isn’t she? Well, I’ll make my own decisions now, thank you very much” and have a laugh with her about that.
If you were too nervous to stand up to her when she was being disrespectful towards you in the relationship, you no longer tolerate her bad treatment of you and either tell her to stop and behave herself, or laugh at her and hang up the phone (or walk away).
If you felt she was too good for you and put her above you in terms of value while in a relationship, you’ve now realized that she is lucky to have you and actually needs to put in a bit more effort to please you, rather than you having to do more to please her.
When you level up and start attracting her in ways that she wasn’t expecting, she won’t be able to stop herself from feeling a renewed sense of respect and attraction for you.
4. Meet up with her and forgive each other’s mistakes
For you and your ex girlfriend to be able to start a new relationship together, you have to forgive each other for past mistakes.
What she did was horrible, but if you want her back, both of you are going to need to get it that at some point.
So, if you’ve re-sparked some of her feelings of respect and attraction for you on a phone call, get her to meet up with you in person.
At the meet up, you can say something along the lines of, “I know that we didn’t handle our break up as well as we should have. We both made mistakes and things definitely weren’t very nice between us for a while as a result. Yet, rather than hold grudges and end up feeling bitter and angry towards each other, we can accept it as a lesson learned and move forward in more mature way. We can forgive each other and just be friends now. So, what do you say? Are you open to clearing the slate between us by forgiving each other and then just being friends?”
By saying something like that to her, you allow her to let go of her negative feelings about you and what happened.
She can then open back up to you, rather than having her guard up because she is holding onto guilt for getting you fired and anger for how you treated her.
When that happens, she stops thinking about all the drama that happened between you and her and starts seeing you as a confident, emotionally strong man who has the courage to forgive her, even though she got him fired.
Without even realizing it, she then stops being on her guard around you and begins to feels good about forgiving you and seeing what can now evolve between you and her.
You can then…
5. Hook up with her sexually
Once you and your ex girlfriend have forgiven each other and she’s feeling respect and attraction for you again, you can then progress to giving her a hug and if she doesn’t pull away, give her a kiss as well.
From there, if she’s open, you can go to your place or hers and hook up with her sexually.
From there, you just need to continue showing her that you’ve transformed yourself into the kind of man that she can now look up to, respect and feel attracted to (e.g. confident, emotionally masculine, assertive, driven).
As you do that, she will naturally begin to fall back in love with you.
You and her can then get back together in a relationship that is 100% better than the last one.
4 Mistakes That Some Guys Make After Getting Fired Because of Their Ex
Getting fired by an angry or malicious ex girlfriend is no joke.
It sucks and it’s a horrible thing to go through.
However, regardless of how much it sucks, make sure that you don’t make any of the following mistakes:
1. Getting extremely angry at her, to the point where she is afraid to ever meet up with you again
For example: A guy might lose his temper with her and say things like, “You’re such a bitch! I can’t believe what you did! How can you live with yourself now? If you were hoping to push my buttons, then you’ve succeeded. Congratulations, you’ve ruined my life! If I had you in front of me right now, I’d wring your little neck, you bitch!”
Naturally, threats like that cause a woman to become fearful and worry about getting hurt.
So, when he eventually calms down (e.g. 1-2 weeks later) and suggests a meet up, she refuses to see him.
Here’s the thing…
There’s no excusing your ex’s behavior for getting you fired from your job, but regardless of what she did, make sure that you don’t make the mistake of stooping to her level and being very nasty in return.
Getting angry is understandable, but taking it out on her and possibly even threatening to hurt her just isn’t going to help the situation.
The only thing that losing your temper will accomplish is to make her lose even more respect and attraction for you as a man, which will make getting her back much more difficult.
The next mistake to avoid is…
2. Sending her abusive texts or e-mails
In the same way that getting angry with her doesn’t accomplish anything other than to drive a wedge even deeper between you and your ex, so does sending her nasty, abusive texts.
Even though you might be tempted to text her in an angry way, other than the temporary satisfaction, it won’t really accomplish anything for you.
Getting angry via text can result in her blocking you on her phone and on social media.
You can also end up coming across as a scary, abusive ex boyfriend and she will pass that information onto others.
Also, when you calm down you realize you want her back, getting her to forgive you and unblock your number will be more difficult than if you had handled the situation in a more emotionally mature way from the beginning.
The next mistake to avoid is…
3. Taking all the blame yourself, even though it was really her fault
If was her fault, then don’t beat yourself up about getting fired.
You simply got involved with a woman who turned out to have a bit of a nasty side to her.
So, don’t take all the blame if you don’t need to.
For example: Sometimes a guy will try to get his ex woman back by taking all the blame for what happened between them, even though she was the one responsible and was being immature, selfish or destructive just for fun.
He thinks, “If I take the blame, she might relax a bit and we can work things out between us. As long as we can clear the air, it won’t matter that she was to blame for everything and that she got me fired. I don’t want to annoy her any further, so I will just make it out like it was all my fault. That way, she might even take pity on me and give me another chance because she’ll feel guilty.”
Yet, here’s the thing…
Taking the blame when you did nothing wrong is the worst thing you can do.
Not only are you rewarding your ex girlfriend for her bad behavior, it will also cause her to lose respect for you for not being able to stand up to her when you know she was clearly in the wrong.
Rather than think, “Oh, wowwwww! He’s being so sweet to take the blame for me when he knows I stuffed up. That makes me feel so much respect for him! I want a guy who puts up with my crap and lets me destroy his life!” she’ll be thinking, “What a sap! Not only did I get him fired in a nasty way, but he’s actually taking the blame for it. That’s so weak-minded! How could I ever look up to him and respect him when I can treat him like crap and he won’t do anything to stop me? What a loser. I don’t want a weak, wimpy guy like that. He’s not man enough for me. He shouldn’t told me that I was wrong for doing that, but also been a good enough of a man to not lose control of his emotions and get angry or aggressive. Then I could have respected him and felt guilty and wrong about what I did. Yet, him taking all the blame like a sap, just makes me realize that I made the right decision to leave him. He’s too much of a wimp for a girl like me.”
So, if your ex girlfriend got you fired because she was being childish, immature or purposefully destructive, don’t reward her by taking the blame.
Of course, that doesn’t mean you should be nasty towards her, blame her or treat her badly.
Continue being the good man that you are and let her see that, even though you don’t excuse her behavior, you’re willing to forgive her and focus on rebuilding the trust, respect and love between you and her from now on.
The next mistake to avoid is…
4. Not making a clear decision about whether or not to get her back
It’s easy to fall into a trap where you’re either missing your ex and wanting her back, or feeling angry and resentful towards her and never wanting to lay eyes on her again.
The problem is that until you can decide what you really want from her, you’ll be stuck in relationship limbo.
You will avoid other women, feel depressed and down about your situation and end up letting her win.
So, make sure that you make a decision right now.
If you know in your heart that your ex girlfriend is a petty, immature and vindictive person and will likely do something malicious again when you and her have a disagreement in future, then it’s time to cut your losses.
Stop thinking about her and what she did and focus instead on going out and meeting new women.
Before long, you will have found yourself a better, more beautiful and loving woman and your ex girlfriend will be a distant memory.
However, if you feel that your ex girlfriend getting you fired was something you brought on yourself via your behavior and attitude, then decide to forgive her and get her back.
Focus on reactivating her feelings of respect, attraction and love for you during interactions and get her back.