The amount of time it takes for an ex to miss you if use the No Contact Rule depends on who she is.
Answer the following questions about her to find out if the No Contact Rule will work on her or not…
1. Is She Inexperienced With Relationships and Break Ups?
If this is her first serious relationship, she might not know what to expect from you after the break up.
So, when she doesn’t hear from you for weeks or even months, she might then start to panic about you finding another woman while she is still trying to cope with the pain of the break up.
She then contacts you to see how you are doing and hopes to find out that you’re still missing her and are available to give the relationship another chance.
However, just because she wants you back (to ease her pain), it doesn’t mean that everything will be okay between you and her for life now.
In most cases, if a woman gets back with her ex after he used the No Contact Rule to make her miss him and she then sees that nothing about him has really changed (e.g. he’s still the same needy, insecure guy, he still doesn’t know how to make her feel like a real woman), she will just break up with him again.
This is why I recommend that guys do not use the No Contact Rule for almost all break up scenarios with women.
In most cases, a guy should just give his ex 3 to 7 days of space and then contact her, re-attract her and guide her back into a relationship.
Another question to answer about your relationship and whether or not the No Contact Rule will work on her, is:
2. Can She Easily Find a New Guy?
If a woman is insecure, sees herself as being unattractive and is worried that she will be unable to find a replacement guy before her ex moves on, she might call her ex when he is using the No Contact Rule on her.
That happens sometimes, but in most cases, a woman can easily find a new guy for sex or a relationship.
All she has to do is get on a dating app or site, or go to a bar or nightclub and loads of guys will be happy to have sex with her and date her if she just makes it easy enough for them.
So, if a woman wants to get laid, it’s usually just about saying, “Yes” to the many guys who will happily stick it in.
This is why the No Contact Rule is better for women who are trying to get a guy back, because most guys can’t don’t have the skills to go out and get laid by lots of women, so they usually come crawling back to women who ignore them after a break up.
Yet, when a woman dumps a guy and he ignores her, she can easily move on without him because most guys will happily have sex with her and even date her if she is open and willing.
Additionally, if a woman has had experience with break ups before, she will know that the pain will eventually fade away, so she can also just ride it out until she feels that she is completely over him.
So, as a man, ignoring your ex isn’t the only option and it’s not the best option.
You don’t have to sit around waiting and hoping that your ex will miss you enough to call you, before some other guy comes along.
For a man, getting an ex back is usually an active process not a passive process.
In other words, like most things in life, if you want her back, you have to go out and put in the effort to get her back before she fully moves on with another guy and gets engaged, married or pregnant.
You have to interact with your ex in whatever way is possible for you (e.g. text her, message her on social media, call her on the phone, or meet up with her in person) and make her feel something for you again.
If she doesn’t feel anything for you, it’s not going to matter to her whether you’re ignoring her or not.
She might contact you to say hi as a way of checking if you still miss her and want her back, but since you haven’t re-sparked her feelings for you, she’s not going to be missing you and wanting you back.
On the other hand, if you actively spark her feelings of attraction and respect for you, she then becomes intrigued and starts to wonder “Why am I feeling this way all of a sudden? Is it a sign that we’re meant to get back together?”
Another question to ask yourself is…
3. Does She Still Feel a Lot of Respect, Attraction and Love For You?
If a woman still has strong feelings for her ex, not hearing from him for a long time might will make her miss him.
She will text or call him to see why he’s ignoring her and if he’s found another woman.
However, in most cases, even when a woman still cares for her ex, if he ignores her for too long, rather than call him up, she might start thinking, “Why isn’t he calling me? Can he have moved on so quickly? I guess I was naïve to sit around hoping that he would call me and get us back together. Well I guess I was a fool for wanting that, so it stops right now. I’m not waiting a second longer for him to call me. If he can move on, so can I. It’s about time that I took my girlfriends up on that girl’s weekend away. I’m going to go, have fun and find myself another guy or at least have sex and enjoy myself.”
She then pushes any positive emotions that she has been feeling for ex into the background and allows herself to feel angry, resentful and indifferent, as a way of getting over him a lot faster.
Here’s the thing…
As a man, you always stand a much better chance of getting your ex woman back when you actively make her have feelings for you, rather than waiting around hoping she will miss you enough to come back on her own.
She can easily find herself a new guy, or start having sex with new guys to enjoy herself and get over you.
So, rather than wasting a lot of time ignoring her using the No Contact Rule, just focus on using every interaction that you have with her from now onas an opportunity to make her smile, laugh and feel happy to be in contact with you.
The happier that she feels when she’s interacting with you, the more likely it will be that she will truly miss you and want you back.
When that happens, her defenses come down and she opens up to the idea of getting back together again.
On the other hand, the less she hears from you, the more time she has to get over you and find herself another guy who is actively making her feel how she wants to feel (i.e. excited, attracted, feminine and girly, in love).
Another important question to ask yourself is…
4. Have You Improved and Changed the Things About Yourself That Turned Her Off?
You and her broke up for a reason.
There was something or a number of things about your behavior and attitude that really turned her off and if you want to get her back and keep her, you need to improve, fix or change those things about yourself.
For example: If a guy got broken up with because he was too needy and insecure, he has to show his ex that he’s now more emotionally mature and confident in himself.
The best way to show her that is based on how he talks to her on the phone and how he interacts with her in person, so she can fully experience the changes.
It’s possible to get some respect and attraction back via text, but it’s minimal compared to what you achieve on a phone call and in person.
Another example is where a woman broke up with a guy because he lacked purpose and direction in life.
As a result, she didn’t feel safe and protected in the relationship with him.
In a case like that, the guy needs to discover his purpose in life (or decide on his big goals, dreams and ambitions for the future) and actively start working towards it.
When the woman then sees that her ex has been improving himself and is now at a different level than he was before, she will naturally begin to regain some of her respect and attraction for him.
She will then begin to worry that she might be losing a great man and will reach out to contact him in some way.
Yet, if she notices that her ex is the same guy she broke up with, him ignoring her just won’t matter much or at all to her.
5. How Much Time Are You Planning on Giving Her?
The problem with ignoring your ex for a long time is that eventually you reach the point where wonder, “How much time is enough? Should I call her now, or keep ignoring her? What if I’ve ignored her too long and now she doesn’t want to talk to me? What if she has a new boyfriend? What if she forgets about me and the feelings she once had for me? Should I just keep waiting for her to miss me? Maybe I should wait another few weeks or a couple of months.”
Don’t do that to yourself.
The general rule of thumb is this…
- Don’t ignore your ex for longer than 3 to 7 days. Longer than that is just a waste of time.
- Get her on a phone call with you and focus on sparking her feelings of respect and attraction by making her laugh, smile and feel good to be talking to you again.
- Then, once you’ve done that, step back and give her another 3 to 7 days of space.
Watch this video for more info…
By giving her an extra few days of space, you’re letting all the good feelings you created in her over the phone sink in and allow her to miss how good it feels to interact with you again.
She might then text you to say hi, or call you and say something like, “Hey, how are you? I had fun chatting to you again the other day, so I thought I’d call to say hi. How was your day?”
When she texts you or calls you, just go ahead and make plans with her to meet up in person.
If she doesn’t call you, then simply contact her again, and repeat the process until she’s agrees to meet up with you in person, where you can then continue to spark her feelings for you to the point where she is ready to be your girl again.
When the No Contact Rule Backfires…
Sometimes, a guy might say to himself, “I don’t know how to make my ex miss me and want me back. So, if I ignore her using the No Contact Rule, it might shock her into realizing that she will lose me forever. She will then come running back to me.”
Yet, while a guy is sits around waits for weeks, months and sometimes years waiting for his ex to come back, rather than making her come back, something else happens instead…
- Waiting around for her slowly destroys his confidence with other women.
Although a guy might initially feel good about his decision to ignore his ex, as days, weeks and even months go by, his confidence starts to fade.
He begins to wonder, “Why isn’t she calling me? How can she not be missing me by now? I guess she’s forgotten all about me. Obviously I wasn’t that important to her for her to forget about me so quickly. If she doesn’t want me back after I’ve ignored her like this, it means that I’m not that loveable. So, what chance do I stand with a woman who is a complete stranger and doesn’t even know me? I’ll never be able to find another woman. Maybe I’m one of those guys who are destined to be alone for life. Maybe she is the one that got away and no other woman will ever make me feel the same way. Maybe other women just won’t love me as much as she did in the beginning. Maybe I’m just not good enough.”
Don’t let that happen to you.
Don’t ignore your ex for so long that you eventually start to believe that you’re not good enough for her or other women.
If you will just get her back by being active, you will see that you can make her feel respect, attraction and love for you right away or very quickly.
When you see that, you will feel confident in yourself and your attractiveness to her and other women.
Another problem with the No Contact Rule is that…
- It makes him feel unworthy of her.
Another weird thing that happens when a guy is ignoring his ex for too long, is that he begins to idolize her.
Suddenly, she becomes perfect in his eyes and he forgets all about the things that used to irritate him about her.
He may then start to think, “She was the perfect woman and I ruined everything. I can’t believe I stuffed up so badly. I’m such a loser. I don’t blame her for breaking up with me and not wanting me back. If I was her, I wouldn’t want me back either. She was always out of my league. I’m not good enough for her. I can’t get her back. She’s too good for me.”
Yet, what he doesn’t realize is that feeling unworthy of her love only makes him seem less attractive to her and other women.
A woman likes the idea of being with a man she feels will be the envy of her female friends and acquaintances because he is always confident in himself, no matter what anyone says or does or what he is going through in life.
She wants to be able to feel proud of him, respect him and feel attracted to him.
So, when a guy is being emotionally sensitive and doesn’t believe in himself and his worth to her, it does nothing to spark her feelings for him.
Instead, she thinks, “I need to get away from this guy as quickly as possible and find myself a real man. I need a man who is emotionally strong and can cope with the bumps on the road of life. I need someone that I can look up to and respect, rather than hanging around with a wimpy guy because I feel sorry for him. He doesn’t even believe in himself. I will have to carry him for life. I need a real man.”
If feel unworthy of getting her back, she will be able to pick up on that based on your tonality, body language and the way you talk, think, behave and interact with her.
She will then be turned off at a deep instinctive level and it will remind her why she broke up with you in the first place.
So, if you want her back, you have to believe you are good enough for her, otherwise neither will she.
Remember: A woman getting a man back is different to a man getting a woman back.
Women can use different techniques that work on most men, such as the No Contact Rule.
However, men need to be active rather than passive.
Men need to actively make the woman have feelings again, rather than sitting around and hoping that she comes running back.
In the 100s of ex back cases that I’ve worked on, the No Contact Rule has only gotten positive results about 20% of the time.
In 80% of cases, the woman simply moves on and completely gets over the guy during the No Contact period.
Another problem with the NC rule is that…
- It makes him fear relationships in general.
When a guy waits around for his ex for a long time and then nothing happens, he might start to get a little bit bitter about women in general.
He may then think something like, “All women are bitches. They pretend that they love you and then when they have your heart in their hands, they stomp on it by dumping you. I’m never going to let a woman do that to me again. I am not getting into another relationship ever again. I’m going to be single for life. Women cannot be trusted!”
Don’t become that confused, bitter guy who doesn’t even acknowledge the fact that billions of relationships have remained together for life.
If you only focus on all the couples who break up or divorce, rather than acknowledging that at least 50% or more of marriages or relationships last a lifetime, you will lose out on the thrill of having the kind of love that gets better and better over time.
I know this because I am now married after sleeping with 100s of women over the years.
I accepted my girlfriend’s marriage proposal and even though our relationship was amazing then, it has continued to get even better over time.
So, make sure that you don’t become one of those guys who are afraid of being in a committed relationship with a woman.
You can make it work with her.
Yes, you made a mistake in the past and your ex broke up with you, but that was then and this is now.
You are at a different level as a man now and you can find love again with your ex, or even with another woman if you want that instead.
However, you will never be able to be happy until you learn to accept that bad things sometimes happen in life.
It’s up to you to use that as an opportunity to improve and become a better, emotionally stronger man, rather than letting it depress you, make you bitter and stop you from having a happy life.
So, if you’re wondering how long it will take for you ex to miss you if you ignore her using the No Contact Rule, the answer is this…
As long as it takes you to start actively re-sparking her feelings of respect and attraction for you.
The longer you wait, the longer it will take.
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