Not every woman makes it obvious that they’re missing their ex husband.
Many women don’t want to give their ex husband the satisfaction of knowing she is missing him.
Others are worried that if they seem to be missing him, he won’t feel much need to improve or impress her in any way if they get back together.
Here are some potential signs that she is missing you, but always remember that you shouldn’t get too caught up in the signs and should instead take action to get her back.
1. She gets in touch with you when she doesn’t have to
Many wives walk away from a separation or divorce absolutely hating their ex husband.
It’s pretty sad to see.
In cases like those, the woman doesn’t want to be in contact with her ex husband unless absolutely necessary (e.g. they have shared custody of their children together and have to text or talk on the phone to arrange times and dates, they have mutual business and financial interests and have to discuss things regularly).
She doesn’t want to give him the impression that she is open to talking to him casually, or still unsure about her decision to leave him, so she will avoid contacting him at all costs.
This is why, if your ex wife has no excuse to contact you, but has been doing it anyway (and being friendly), there’s a good chance that she still thinks about you and misses you.
Of course, there can be other ‘sneaky’ reasons why she is doing it, which I will discuss in this post, but for now, let’s just assume that she is contacting you because she still does miss you and is unsure whether you and her will remain separated or divorced for life.
If she is missing you, the most important question you need to answer is, what are you going to do about it?
Are you going to take the bull by the horns and begin re-attracting her and then seducing her, so and her can get back together, or are you going to keep waiting for more signs from her and then potentially risk losing her if she opens herself up to dating new men and falls in love with someone else?
Here’s the thing…
A lot of men allow their self-doubt to ruin the chance they still have with their ex wife.
For example: A man might get contacted by his ex wife and rather than take it as a positive sign and then begin the process of getting her back, he thinks, “Well, it’s nice that she contacts me, but that doesn’t necessarily mean she misses me. She’s probably just trying to find out if I’m still missing her so she can feel good about herself. Alternatively, she might just feel sorry for me, or wants to be friendly. I don’t want to read too much into it, make a move and then get rejected by her. I couldn’t handle losing her again.”
The thing is, he could be right, or he could be wrong.
She may only be contacting him to be nice, to find out if he’s still missing her or because she wants to see if he’s okay.
Yet, she might also be contacting him because she’s feeling lonely, missing what they had and secretly wishing they could reconcile and get a relationship started again.
Which one is true?
Well, when it comes to getting an ex back, you never know for sure, which is why you have the confident and courageous, rather than insecure and afraid.
Unfortunately, a lot of men don’t learn what you are learning now and as a result, a man will doubt his chances with her and just wait for her give him a crystal clear signal that she misses him and wants him back.
Yet, that almost never happens because the woman usually doesn’t want to risk getting rejected if her ex husband has completely lost interest in her.
Additionally, in many cases, she quickly gets tired of contacting him without him doing anything to get her back, so she stops trying to interact with him and begins opening herself up to dating new men.
If she happens to meet a man who makes her feel the kind of respect, attraction and love that she has been looking for, then she will rapidly lose interest in trying to rekindle things with her ex husband and will try to move on with the new man.
If you don’t want that to happen in your case, then don’t sabotage yourself by filling your head with negative self-talk (e.g. “There’s no way she would want me back. We went through a horrible separation/divorce. She was totally over me”).
You’ve got to believe in yourself and be courageous if you want her back.
So, if she has been contacting you when she really didn’t have to, then take it as a sign that she’s missing you.
There’s no guarantee that it means she is missing you, but take it as a sign that she is.
Use it to feel confident and as though you have a real opening to get her back.
By interacting with her in a confident way, she will naturally feel some respect and attraction for you, which will open her up further to the possibility of rekindling with you.
So, call her on the phone or better yet, meet up with her in person (e.g. to catch up for a coffee to say hi as friends) and start reactivating her feelings of respect and attraction for you again.
After all, for her to have wanted to marry you in the first place, it means that she once had very strong feelings of love, respect and attraction for you.
That will still be there in the background and you can get her to reconnect with it.
The fact is that love doesn’t die.
It simply gets pushed into the background and covered over with negative feelings (e.g. frustration, disappointment, anger, resentment).
You can replace those negative feelings with positive feelings and when you do, the love will come back into the foreground.
She will literally begin to connect with the love that she used to feel for you.
Another potential sign that your ex wife misses you is…
2. She likes your social media posts
Although it’s possible that your ex wife is only clicking like for the heck of it, to be nice, to be seen as a good person by other, or even because she wants to mess with your head.
Yet, it’s also likely that she has been clicking like because misses you and is trying to show you that she doesn’t hate you.
As a result of missing you, thinking about you and wondering what you’re up to, she has been checking your social media as a way of keeping in touch with you, without making her feelings too obvious.
In many cases, a woman doesn’t want to get rejected by the ex that she dumped, separated or divorced.
She has been able to walk away in the position of power (i.e. she left you) and doesn’t want that to be switched around now if she shows interest and you reject her.
This is why, in almost all cases, a woman will wait for her ex man to take the lead in the reconciliation process.
She will give him subtle hints and signs, which could be seen as innocent (e.g. clicking like, staying in contact when she doesn’t have to), rather than directly saying, “Hey, I miss you. Want to get back together?”
This is why, you can’t get stuck doubting yourself and wondering whether or not she is showing enough positive signs of interest.
You just have to be courageous and get things moving along.
For example: Don’t just click like back on her photos or leave nice comments on her posts, because that will most-likely lead nowhere.
Instead, have the balls to pick up the phone, make her laugh and smile and feel good to be talking to you again and then get her to meet up with you in person.
In person, you can then fully re-spark her feelings for you (e.g. by showing her via your attitude, actions, behavior, conversation style and the way you respond to her that you’re a completely different man to the one she divorced).
She will then naturally open back up to seeing you more often to see where things go, or will at least walk away feeling drawn to you and wanting to see you again, in which case, she will text, call or message you to stay in contact and hope that you have the courage to arrange another meet up when the time is right.
By the way…
If you’re not on social media, you should start.
I often get contacted by men saying, “Oh, my wife and I didn’t use social media much” or, “I’m not into Facebook or Instagram.”
Believe me, I get it.
I’m a married man and I don’t spend much time on Facebook, let alone Instagram.
My wife is the one who posts 99% of anything that is posted about me, herself and our kids on Facebook.
I rarely post anything on social media.
However, if a man is trying his ex wife back, social media is the perfect place to let her see how confident and happy he is without her and how good is life is now.
When a woman sees that, she feels respect and attraction for a man.
Contrary to what some guys believe, a woman doesn’t feel attracted to a guy who is sitting around feeling sorry for himself and can’t cope without her after a break up.
It doesn’t make her think, “Wow, he’s so loyal” and instead makes her think quite negatively about him.
On the other hand, when a woman sees that her ex man seems very confident in himself, is happy and is moving forward in life, it makes her feel like he isn’t a lonely loser who can’t cope without her.
In fact, it makes her realize that if he’s that confident now, then other women will find him attractive and if she doesn’t make a move soon, he might meet a new woman who adores him and he may end up falling in love with her.
When she feels sparks of respect and attraction for him, misses him and is also beginning to worry that she might lose him to another woman, it naturally motivates her to contact him and be open to his suggestions to catch up in person.
So, don’t be afraid to show your ex that you’re doing great by posting up confident, happy photos of yourself having fun with other people.
Don’t post up photos of you alone though.
That does not work.
The photos have to be of you with other people where you look confident and happy and where the other people look happy that you are there with them.
In other words, don’t make the mistake of asking random people to take a photo with you.
It’s often possible to tell when a person has done that because the body language in the photo suggests a lack of a connection between the people, or it’s obvious that the people don’t really want to be in the photo with the other person.
So, make sure that you get photos of yourself looking confident, happy and included/loved by the others in the photos.
Photos like that show your ex wife that you really are happy, confident and enjoying life with other people.
Additionally, it also shows her that you’re not alone, you’re not being rejected by people and you have options.
That makes a woman feel respect and attraction for a man, even if she doesn’t openly admit it.
Another potential sign that your ex wife misses you is…
3. She still texts you as though you’re in a relationship
One of the biggest clues that a woman misses her ex husband is when she talks to him as though they’re still together.
For example: She might…
- Gossip about her family and friends to him like she used to when they were married.
- Ask for his advice about random things.
- Tell him things about her life like she used to in the past (e.g. her visit to the doctor and the results, her problems at work).
- Discusses her day in detail with him (she talks about work, who she bumped into during her lunch break, how she forgot to put gas in the car and almost didn’t make it home).
- She sends him old photos of the two of them, or of them with their kids.
- She sends cute emojis, emoticons or stickers via chat like she used to when things were good.
- She regularly cracks jokes/uses humor (which takes a bit of effort for most people) to keep things feeling fun between them.
If a man is getting those sort of signs from his ex wife and he wants her back, then he should really make a move now while he still can.
Of course, it’s also reasonable to say that some women will contact their ex husband like that just to string him along to make herself feel better, as she secretly moves on behind his back.
Some women can be vindictive and manipulative like that.
However, you are going to be the best judge in terms of your ex wife and what your gut instinct is telling you she is up to.
So, if your ex wife has been contacting you as though you are still together, what is your gut instinct telling you?
Is she doing it to string you along, or is she showing you interest and trying to hint at her desire to reconcile?
Regardless, if she contacting you and being friendly, then you have an opportunity to re-attract her and get her back.
Use the interactions as a way to re-spark her feelings of respect, attraction and love for you by being flirtatious, making her feel girly by being very manly, being a bit of a challenge and so on.
Get the spark back and then make a move to arrange an in person meet up.
Another potential sign that your ex wife misses you is…
4. Her attempt to date and move on without you doesn’t seem to be working out
After a divorce, some women try to move on as quickly as possible by dating new men.
Some women find it easy, or get lucky and find themselves a great replacement man, but many struggle.
Often, by the time a woman divorces, she has already had children, has lost her youthful good looks and no longer feels confident about her body or overall attractiveness to men.
This can cause her to approach dating in a hesitant way, where she is unwilling to open herself up to men easily, which can lead to awkward first dates, a lack of connection and hardly any second dates.
Alternatively, she can be unlucky and meet a lot of duds (i.e. men who have no clue how to attract women and are still single into their mid to late life because other women don’t want them), which can cause her to realize that her ex husband isn’t as bad as she once thought he was.
So, if your ex wife hasn’t been able to successfully move on with a new man, it can result in her missing you and wishing that you and her could just sort things out.
Additionally, in some cases, a woman just can’t ever get herself to feel ready to move on with a new man, even though she has divorced her husband.
This is why, rather than continuing to ask yourself questions like, “How do I know if my ex wife misses me?” just start making the right moves to get her back.
Don’t make the classic mistake of thinking, “I’ll just wait for her to come to me when she’s ready” like other men do and then end up missing out on your chance to get her back.
Additionally don’t make the other classic mistake of thinking, “I’ll wait for more obvious signs before I try to re-attract her and get her back” and then feeling disappointed and rejected once again when you see that she has moved on.
The reality is that if you wait too long for her to make it obvious that she wants you back, she might get the feeling that you’re no longer interested in her and as a result, push herself to start moving on with new men to make herself feel better.
Another potential sign that your ex wife misses you is…
5. She is open to catching up with you as a friend
If your ex wife hasn’t slammed the door on interacting with you and instead, has been open to catching up to say hi from time to time, it’s a good sign that she still has some feelings for you.
Of course, sometimes a woman wants to be friends with her ex as a way of keeping him holding on (i.e. hoping that they can get back together again), as a way of making herself feel good about herself.
She can then secretly move on behind his back and then when she’s in a new relationship, she can rub it in her ex husband’s face as way of getting emotional revenge for what happened.
Alternatively, a wife will sometimes remain friendly with her ex husband to make things easier for the kids, or for herself (i.e. not having to deal with an angry, rejected, humiliated ex husband).
There are many different scenarios and motives for friendly behavior from an ex wife.
However, regardless of what applies to your situation, the reality is that if your ex wife is still open to catching up as friends, then you have a perfect opportunity to re-attract her and get her back into a relationship.
Whatever you do though, don’t make the mistake of acting like her nice, platonic friend who isn’t interested in her sexually and romantically.
If she thinks that, she may feel hesitant to show interest in you in case you reject her, or she might force herself to get sexual with other men to make herself feel sexy, loved, wanted and attractive.
So, from now on, make sure that you use every interaction you have with your ex wife to re-spark her feelings for you and make her feel sexy in your eyes.
From there, you can progress to giving her a hug, a kiss and then having sex.
You might not get back together just because of that, but it will be a start.
You won’t be in the friend zone with her anymore and if you are both feeling attracted and drawn to each other, you will both feel more comfortable about hugging and kissing from then on.
If you have also improved a lot as a man and now understand how to make a relationship feel happy, in love and fulfilling for the both of you, then she will naturally feel drawn to getting back with you for real.
Get Your Ex Wife Back Faster By Avoiding These 5 Mistakes
According to research conducted by Nancy Kalish, Ph.D., professor emeritus of psychology at California State University, Sacramento, married couples that reunite after divorce have a 72% chance of staying together for life.
That means, if you begin the ex back process with your ex wife right now and get her back, your chances of ‘living happily ever after’ together are pretty high.
So, do what needs to be done to get her back.
You can get her back and keep the relationship together.
You really can.
However, just make sure that you don’t mess up your chances with her by making any of the following mistakes:
1. Reading way too much into what she says or texts
If you know how a woman’s mind works and how they feel attraction, you will know that women rarely say what they really mean.
For example: “I’m fine” when she’s really pissed off, or “I just want a nice man,” but she actually feels turned off by men who are too nice and turned on by men who are a challenge and cause her to want to be on her best behavior around him.
So, you can’t always take what a woman says as what she really means.
For example: If you ex wife is having a particularly good day and is remembering how happy you and her used to be, she may text or say something along the lines of, “Hey, I was just thinking about you and I wanted to say hi.”
Alternatively, she may be having a bad day, be on her period, be feeling angry about how things ended up between you and her and as a result, end up responding to you in a cold, distant way.
Yet, neither of those two reactions prove anything other than that she’s a typical, emotional woman.
It’s not her way of saying she misses you, or that she hates you.
She’s just in a mood.
So, don’t waste your time trying to make sense of what your ex wife really feels about you based on what she says or texts.
If you try to follow a woman’s moods, she will lead you around in circles to feelings of self-doubt, confusion and frustration.
So, don’t focus so much on what she is saying to you, or texting to you and hoping to figure out her real feelings.
Instead, just take control of the situation by re-attracting her and guiding her through the ex back process.
In other words, interact with her, re-attract her, make her want to get back together, reconcile, establish a more effective relationship dynamic and enjoy the great times ahead with her.
That’s what men do to get their ex wife back.
Yet, the men who fail often make the mistake of reading into the different things their ex wife says to them, or texts them.
It causes them to doubt themselves, hesitate, wait and before they know it, she’s in love with another man.
Another mistake to avoid making is…
2. Assuming that the ball is in her court
For example: A man might think, “She was the one who wanted the divorce, so if she wants me back, it’s up to her to make it happen. I don’t want to make a move and get rejected by her again. She has to make it 100% clear to me that she wants me back.”
Yet, here’s the thing…
An ex wife (who was the one to initiate the separation or divorce) will rarely take control of the ex back process for the following reasons:
- She doesn’t want to put herself on the line and risk getting rejected by her ex husband if he doesn’t have feelings for her anymore.
- She doesn’t want to come across as being too easy and therefore, give him the impression that they can get back together without him really having to change anything about his approach to the relationship.
- She wants to see if her ex husband has the confidence to reactivate her feelings for him and get her back, or he has lost all confidence due to her rejection.
- She is enjoying her freedom and knows that she can move on without her ex, or get back with him, but either way, she will be okay.
- She wants to see if her ex has enough interest in her to be bothered to get her back.
- She wants to be seduced and romanced back into a relationship, so she feels special and wanted, rather than just getting back together for the heck of it.
- She is worried what her family, friends, children or coworkers will think if she suddenly changes her mind and starts trying to get back the ex husband that she was speaking so badly about.
This is why, it’s always best that you just build up the courage to get things moving along with her, rather than waiting for her to do everything to get you and her back together.
If you wait around for too long, she may just decide that you’re not interested in her anymore and will then almost certainly put her efforts into getting over you and moving on (usually with another man).
Another mistake to avoid making is…
3. Assuming that other men are going to make her feel the way you did when you and her were in love
The love, good times and connection you and your ex wife shared was completely unique.
No other man can give her the exact same experience, connection and memories that she had with you.
So, although she might be able to find another man, he will never be able to offer her the feelings that she experienced with you.
If you want to use that to your advantage, you need to interact with her and make her feel a renewed sense of respect and attraction for you.
If you do that, she will naturally start to reconnect with the love she used to feel for you.
Of course, she won’t necessarily jump into your arms right away, but she might.
Additionally, if she sees that you really have become a totally new and improved man since the divorce (in terms of how you think, behave, feel, act and react when interacting with her), then she will feel like she’d be missing out if she didn’t give you another chance.
As a result, she will open up to you and you can then get her back.
So, don’t go wasting time worrying that other men might be more attractive to her, or make her feel a new kind of love.
You can make her feel attracted to you in new ways and then, when she reconnects with her old love for you and experiences newfound love for you, it will be a new and exciting experience for her.
4. Not improving your ability to attract women in general
There are certain male behaviors and personality traits that women are attracted to, regardless of culture, age and experience with men and relationships.
For example: In a relationship, a woman will feel attracted to a man’s…
- Confidence and emotional strength.
- Ability to make her feel like a feminine, girly woman in his presence.
- Ability to stand up to her in an assertive, but loving way.
- Ability to make her feel important, special and loved, even though he is totally focussed on his goals and ambitions in life.
- Belief in himself and in his value and attractiveness.
- Ability to be a bit cheeky, or be a bit of a challenge.
- Masculine way of behaving, thinking, feeling, acting and reacting.
- Ability to flirt with her and build up sexual tension and desire.
On the other hand, here are some of the things that will turn a woman off about a man when in a relationship:
- His insecurity and self doubt.
- His inability to stand on his own two feel without her support, guidance or reassurance.
- How she can walk all over him and treat him badly because he doesn’t know how to put her back in her place in a dominant, but loving way.
- His inability to handle her moods (i.e. he gets moody and upset when she gets moody or upset, rather than maintaining control of his emotions like a man).
- That he’s always so neutral towards her, so she feels more like his friend than a sexy, desirable woman.
- His lack of manliness in the way he thinks, behaves, feels, acts and reacts to her or to life (e.g. always complaining, whining about things, making excuses about why he isn’t as successful as he wants to be, being emotionally sensitive).
- His ‘my way or the highway’ attitude when it comes to a relationship, rather than being the leader in the relationship, but also being loving, flexible and willing to take her feelings, needs or wants into consideration.
- His emotional dependence on her (e.g. needy, clingy).
- His tendency to ignore relationship problems and just expect a woman to put up with them for life.
Unfortunately, a lot of men try to get their ex wife back without ever truly realizing where they’ve been going wrong, or not being willing to make real improvements to their approach to the relationship.
As a result, the woman simply isn’t interested because she feels as though the relationship will end up being the same as before.
So, if you want to get your wife back for real, make sure that you prepare yourself to re-attract her with a new approach, so she feels refreshed and open to giving you and her a real chance.