Here are the 5 most common reasons why you might feel that way after being dumped by the woman you love:
1. She became your world
It’s natural and normal for a couple that is in love to put each other in first place in their life.
However, it can sometimes go too far to the point where the guy mistakenly begins to make everything about his girl.
For example: A guy like that will usually…
- Give up all the things that don’t include her (e.g. a hobby or interest) to spend even more of his time with her.
- Spend less and less time with his friends and in some cases, even stop hanging out with them completely, unless he can bring her along too.
- Put his big goals and dreams on hold because he feels like they’re not as important to him as she is. If he doesn’t have aspirations and ambitions in life, he would most likely say to himself, “I don’t need anything other than my woman. She’s the best thing that’s ever happened to me. She fulfills all my desires. She’s all my dreams rolled into one. That’s why I need to make sure that I take care of her and spend all my time with her so that she will feel loved and appreciated and will never want to leave me. She’s all that matters to me now.”
- Feel hurt if she wants to spend some time alone, or go out with her friends without him tagging along every time.
- Not do anything without her approval and encouragement.
- Worry that if he’s not with her all the time, some other guy might come along and steal her from him.
- Worry that she will realize that he’s not good enough for her and that she can easily find a better man to replace him with.
- Feel like he needs her in his life to be happy and without her his life wouldn’t be worth living.
Yet, what he doesn’t realize is that behaving like that in a relationship with a woman is a recipe for disaster.
It almost never lasts because women hate to feel responsible for a man’s emotional state in a relationship.
Here’s the thing…
A woman definitely loves and appreciates it when a guy is good to her and makes her feel special.
However, she also wants him to be happy, confident and forward moving in life with or without her support or reassurance.
Unfortunately, many guys don’t know that, so they end up ruining a perfectly good relationship.
Then, when she breaks up with him because he became too clingy, needy and smothering, he can’t function without her.
Basically, he’s ‘put all his eggs in one basket’ (i.e. he made her the center of his world) and now that she’s gone, he’s got nothing left.
He has no friends to go out with and have fun with.
Nothing but a sense of emptiness and hopelessness.
As a result, he feels lonely and unable to move forward and be happy again in his life.
Basically, he’s become emotionally dependent on his woman and has made her responsible for his happiness and well being.
Does this sound like something that happened between you and your ex?
Did you make her your sole purpose in life?
If that is the case, it’s only natural that you will feel lonely after being broken up with.
The good news though is that you don’t have to get stuck with feeling lonely and left out.
For example: Some of the ways you can make yourself feel better and not only make some friends along the way, but also reactivate your ex’s sexual and romantic feelings for you are…
- Take some real steps towards attaining your big goals and dreams in life. If you don’t have any goals, start thinking about what really makes you feel happy and excited and begin taking steps towards achieving those things. You don’t have to achieve big things, but do start making progress.
- Take up a new active hobby that involves interacting with other people (e.g. take up a sport such as tennis, martial arts, football, take cooking classes or dancing classes, join a group exercise class that meets up a couple of times a week or on the weekends).
- Make some new friends (e.g. become more involved with people at work, join a meet up group in your area).
- Start looking at your ex as a woman you want back, but don’t need back.
The more you focus on becoming genuinely happy without your ex, the less lonely you will start to feel.
You will be too busy having a fun, interesting life again.
At the same time, you’ll begin meeting new people and making friends.
You will also become more attractive to your ex (and to women in general), because women, including ex’s, are attracted to good men who are confident, happy and forward moving in life, regardless of whether they have a woman in their life or not.
You can then get her back if you want to.
Of course, if you want to get her back quicker, without having to go out and socialize, here’s how to do it…
Another common reason why you might be feeling lonely after being broken up with by the woman you loved is…
2. You lost social confidence while in the relationship with her
Obviously, one of the things that happens when in a relationship (especially if you’ve been together for a long time), is that as a couple, you begin to compensate for each others shortfalls.
So, now imagine a guy who is a bit of an introvert and is shy in social situations, gets into a relationship with a boisterous, outgoing, talkative girl.
Suddenly he no longer has to put in so much effort to be sociable when going out, because his woman picks up the slack for him (i.e. she does the talking so he can sit back and enjoy the conversation).
He also lets her handle situations that require interacting with other people (e.g. bargaining for the best price when purchasing something, organizing a get-together with family or friends, making arrangements with contractors or tradesmen).
Naturally, this arrangement suits both of them, because they are each doing what they feel most comfortable doing (i.e. he can stick to himself and she can socialize and lead with her confident personality).
Yet, even though it might seem idyllic, the truth of the matter is, when a woman becomes too powerful in the relationship to the point where she’s leading, it can cause problems later on.
For example: She may slowly begin to resent always being the more socially confident one in the relationship and always having to take the lead in social situations.
This can cause her to lose respect for her guy for not being man enough to handle social situations without her.
When she stops respecting him, she eventually stops feeling attracted to him and without those two emotions, her feelings of love begin to fade away.
She will then likely break up with him and look for a man who is emotionally strong and confident enough to be in the lead in the relationship with her, rather than taking the back seat.
Of course, when a guy like that gets broken up with, it’s going to be a big blow to him.
He’s naturally going to feel lonely and struggle to move forward with his life, because he’s spent a long time avoiding social situations.
As a result, his confidence is shot and he doesn’t believe he can go out and rebuild his social life now that his ex is not there with him to lead and smooth the way.
Yet, here’s the thing…
If you have lost your confidence in social situations, because your ex was the one who did all the talking and interacting with others, it’s understandable why getting out and making new friends now that you’re broken up is difficult for you.
However, that doesn’t mean it’s impossible.
You have to take small steps.
For example: If you make yourself go to one meet up in your area and you find yourself interacting with other, like-minded people, you will almost certainly start to feel a bit better.
This will then give you the confidence to try something else (e.g. take up an interactive class such as dancing or martial arts).
Before you know it, your confidence in social situations will start to grow.
It will then start to reflect in your attitude, actions, behavior and the way you interact with your ex and other people.
It then becomes a lot easier for you to not only make new friends, but get your ex back too.
When she notices that you’re so much more confident and emotionally strong than you were before, she will automatically feel a renewed surge of respect for you again.
When she respects you, she will also feel attracted to you and then reconnecting with her initial feelings of love becomes so much easier for her to do.
Another common reason why you might be feeling lonely after being broken up with by the woman you loved is…
3. You feel like a failure or like an outsider in society now
After getting dumped by the woman he loves, a guy might find himself thinking things like, “I’m such a loser,” or “I’m a failure as a man. I had the perfect woman for me and I couldn’t hold on to her. There must be something wrong with me.”
Additionally, if he notices that everyone around him is in a relationship (e.g. his coworkers, neighbors, guys that he knows at university or school), he may begin to feel like an outsider.
These feelings can worsen when friends make arrangements to meet up and he gets left out, because it’s couples only and he’s now the only one without a girl.
He can then easily fall into a spiral of loneliness and depression.
Yet, what a guy like that doesn’t realize is that no relationship is perfect.
In fact, these days, it’s fairly normal for a relationship to go through a break up, or an almost break up at least once.
In some cases, a couple will go through many actual break ups before they eventually get to the point where they’re truly happy and want to stay together for life.
So, even though your ex may have broken up with you, it doesn’t mean you’re a failure as a man.
In fact, you can look at this as an opportunity to become an even better man than you were before (i.e. by learning from your past mistakes).
You can then choose to get your ex back if you want to, or find yourself another, high quality woman to be in a relationship with.
The choice is yours.
So, rather than feeling lonely, or like a failure or a loser for getting dumped, decide to thank your ex instead (in your head only of course), for giving you a chance to level up as a man.
Then, take action, by changing your approach to attraction and focusing on getting your ex girl back (if you want to).
Interact with her over the phone and in person and let her experience the new you for herself.
Don’t tell her that you’ve changed.
Just be the new, confident, more emotionally strong version of yourself when you interact with her and she will pick up on it automatically.
It will naturally come through in how you talk to her, what you say and how you respond to her and react to what she says and does (e.g. when she tries to provoke you into thinking, acting and behaving the way you used to by being cold, bitchy or indifferent towards you and pretending she doesn’t have any feelings for you anymore).
When she sees for herself that you really have leveled up as a man, something really amazing happens…
She can’t stop herself from feeling respect for you again.
When she respects you, she also feels attracted to you and then the idea of hanging out with you more becomes something she’s willing to do.
You can then show her that you really are a new man now and get her back.
However, it all starts with believing in yourself and in your value, rather than thinking that one break up makes you a failure in the eyes of your ex and of society in general.
It doesn’t.
Another common reason why you might be feeling lonely after being broken up with by the woman you loved is…
4. You’re not yet in the right frame of mind to make new friends
Getting broken up with can be difficult.
One day you’re part of a couple, doing things together and having someone there most of the time and then next, that person is gone and you’re all alone.
Naturally there’s going to be an adjustment period where you’re going to go through what is known as the 7 stages of grief after a break up.
These 7 stages are:
- Shock – you just can’t believe that this has happened to you.
- Denial – you struggle to believe that it’s real and you may even expect your ex to call and say that she’s changed her mind.
- Anger – you feel angry at yourself for ruining the relationship and also with your ex because she let you down; especially if she promised to be with you for life.
- Bargaining – you make promises to yourself and to her that you will do anything she wants if she will give you another chance.
- Depression – you feel lonely and hopeless.
- Testing – you possibly reach out to your ex to see if there’s a chance that she might give you another chance.
- Acceptance – you accept that it’s over and you decide to move on with your life and be happy with or without her. Yes, you want her back, but you don’t need her back to feel good about yourself anymore.
As you can see, you’re likely still not through the 7 stages of grief.
However, you can easily get through them and put yourself into the right frame of mind to make new friends very quickly, but you have to take some action.
Just sitting around or keeping yourself hidden away at home after work won’t help you to make real friends and get rid of that lonely feeling.
This is why, the first step you need to take is to regain control of your emotions.
Get rid of the feeling of neediness and desperation by knowing that you can easily make new friends if you really want to.
Additionally, you can also re-attract your ex and get her back if you want to do that.
As a result, you don’t need to panic, worry or feel desperate or alone in any way.
So you can relax and confidently begin transforming your life by taking the first steps to making new friends.
One of the easiest and most natural ways to do that is to join a meet up group in your area that does something you relish doing (e.g. gaming, debating, discussing philosophy, hiking, bike riding, wine tasting).
This automatically puts you in contact with like-minded people, so you won’t have to struggle to find something in common to talk about.
You’ll also be doing something you enjoy, which will allow you to relax and be yourself, rather than being tense and worrying about whether you’re saying the wrong thing.
You will then likely notice that you’re making friends easily and effortlessly once again.
Then, if you decide that you also want to get your ex back, you will be in the right frame of mind to do it.
You will naturally come across as being a well-rounded, emotionally strong, emotionally independent man and she will instinctively feel attracted to you again in a way that feels good to her.
Another common reason why you might be feeling lonely after being broken up with by the woman you loved is…
5. You don’t know that you can get her back fairly easily
When a guy is sitting at home feeling lonely after being broken up with and having no friends to distract himself with, it’s easy for him to begin thinking things like, “My life is such a mess. I’ve lost the love of my life and I’m all alone. I’m at the lowest point imaginable and there’s nothing I can do to change it. It’s all just hopeless!”
Yet, what a guy like that doesn’t realize is that just because his ex doesn’t have feelings for him right now, it doesn’t mean she will feel the same way a week from now after he has reactivated her sexual and romantic feelings for him.
In fact, getting an ex woman back is much easier than a lot of guys think it is.
Right now, you might believe that there’s nothing you can do to feel better, but there is.
You can interact with your ex over the phone and in person and you can re-spark her feelings for you so she wants to give you another chance.
By the way…
Some of the ways you can do that are by…
- Using humor to make her smile and laugh and feel happy and relaxed to be interacting with you again.
- Being a good man, but also being lovingly assertive when talking to her, so she can see that she can’t dominate you during conversations.
- Maintaining your confidence with her regardless of how unfriendly, aloof or mean she seems at first.
- Believing in yourself and in your value to her, rather than doubting yourself, thinking you don’t stand a chance with her then making her feel turned off by appearing sad and dejected when you interact with her.
- Flirting with her to create sexual tension, rather than being too neutral or friendly.
- Showing her that you’ve leveled up as a man and that she can now truly look up to you, respect you, feel attracted to you and love you, rather than continuing to make the same old attraction mistakes as before.
The more that you give your ex the kind of attraction experience she always wanted from you but never got, the more she will start to feel as though she has to give you another chance, or else she might end up regretting it.
When you make her feel that way, her sexual and romantic feelings for you get reactivated and you can then get her back and enjoy a new, even better relationship than before.
