Here are 8 things for you to consider, as you try to decide whether or not your ex is in a serious relationship.
1. Have all of your past relationships been serious?
They haven’t been, right?
Some relationships are just casual, even if they look serious on the surface to other people.
The reality is that every relationship you have (or she has) will be different.
For example: Some of your relationships with women in the past may have started out feeling serious to you, but over time you realized that she wasn’t your ideal match.
Other times, you may have gotten into a casual relationship that then became serious over time because you fell in love with the woman.
Alternatively, you may have known right from the beginning that you didn’t intend to get serious with a particular girl and only planned on sleeping with her for a while.
Women do the same thing when it comes to men.
So, if your ex’s new guy is able to make her feel more respect, attraction and love than you did and he also continues to build on those feelings over time, then the relationship will probably become more serious.
However, if he can’t build on her feelings (e.g. because he’s too nice, not manly enough, puts up with her drama, is too emotionally sensitive or insecure), she will stick with him long enough to get over you and then move on.
2. How long have they been together?
For a relationship to be truly serious, a couple has to be together for many years.
Most relationships break up within the first month and the ones that last, usually don’t last more than 1-2 years.
So, if your ex has only been dating a guy for a few weeks or months, chances are high that things haven’t reached the “Happily ever after” stage yet.
That means, if you want her back, you can.
Not by sitting around doing nothing and hoping that things won’t work out for her, but rather by interacting with her every chance you get and actively re-sparking her sexual and romantic feelings for you again.
For example: You can do that by…
- Making interactions with her fun and interesting, rather than being too serious all the time.
- Being flirtatious and creating a sexual vibe between you, rather than being neutral.
- Showing her your confidence by laughing at her in a loving way when she tells you that she doesn’t have feelings for you anymore, rather than feeling insecure and doubting your attractiveness to her.
- Reacting differently when she creates unnecessary drama, rather than get upset.
The more you make her feel respect and attraction for you again, the more confused she feels about her new relationship.
3. Is she just using him to get over you?
Sometimes a woman will quickly get into another relationship after a breakup, to help her from missing her ex, or from feeling brokenhearted.
Yet, in most cases, that’s just a rebound relationship and it’s not with a guy that she perceives as being her ideal man.
Instead, he’s usually the kind of man who displays personality traits and behaviors that are the opposite of her ex.
For example: If he was too smothering and focused all his attention solely on her, her new guy will likely be more emotionally distant and closed off and prefers to spend a lot of time on his own pursuing his own interests and hobbies.
Although that might be okay to her in the short term, for a serious relationship she prefers a man who is emotionally independent, but also loving and attentive.
So, even though your ex’s new relationship might be fun, or just not stressful for now, it doesn’t mean that her new guy’s approach will maintain her interest in the long term.
4. Is she with a guy who was waiting in the wings for a while, but she wasn’t ever that attracted to?
Sometimes a woman will get into a relationship with a guy simply because he feels sexual romantic feelings for her and wants a relationship with her.
However, she doesn’t feel the same way about him and instead, she’s just enjoying the attention after her breakup.
Essentially, she’s using the relationship to make herself feel better because her confidence likely took a big dent.
She now just wants to feel loved, desired and appreciated without having to give too much of herself in return (i.e. because the guy is so happy to be with her that he accepts any crumbs of attention she’s willing to give him).
However, if the guy fails to nurture and grow her feelings of respect, sexual attraction and love for him, the relationship won’t last.
As soon as another man comes along and makes her feel intense sexual attraction for him, she will quickly hook up with him.
5. Is he her type, or do they seem like a bit of an odd couple?
If a woman and her new man are complete opposites (e.g. she’s outgoing and bubbly while he’s shy and introverted) she might just be enjoying the fact that he’s nothing like her ex.
For example: She likes that he prefers to stay at home and focus all his attention on spoiling her, unlike her ex who spent a lot of time hanging out with his friends and as a result, made her feel neglected.
However, as soon as the thrill of being with a guy who thinks, acts and behaves differently to her ex wears off, she may begin to see that he’s not really the guy for her and she wants to be with a man who has more in common with her.
Of course, if he can build on her feelings of respect, sexual attraction and love for him, she can easily become one of those women who say, “Opposites attract and even though we’re so different, he’s the guy I want to be with.”
6. How has your ex’s behavior changed towards you?
For example: Did she initially want to stay friends, but now she doesn’t want you around anymore?
That may be because things are getting more serious in her new relationship and she doesn’t want you getting in the way of that.
Did she start off being nice, but is now being a bitch to you?
Her reason might be that she’s trying to get you to hate her, so you give up and move on.
Did she start off ignoring you after the breakup, but suddenly she’s texting, messaging and even calling you to say “Hi?”
That can mean she’s trying to signal that her new relationship isn’t serious and she’s still open to being re-attracted by you.
7. Are you and her still friends on social media?
When a woman gets into a serious relationship with a guy, she will usually focus all her attention on him.
Additionally, she won’t do anything that might cause him to feel jealous or like she’s not fully over her ex.
So, if your ex is still friends with you on social media, it can be a sign that her new relationship hasn’t hit the serious stage yet.
You can actually use that to your advantage, by posting photos of yourself having fun with other people.
Then, even if she doesn’t admit it, she will automatically feel more attraction for you for getting on with enjoying your life, rather than sitting around feeling lonely and desperate without her.
That makes it easier for you to re-attract her and get her back because she’s open to you.
8. Has she been rubbing her new relationship in your face to get a reaction out of you?
A woman will often do this for different reasons.
- She still has feelings for him and she wants to shock him into feeling jealous, so that he can then take action, take the lead and get her back.
- She wants to see if he’s confident enough to get her back, even though it appears that she’s in a serious relationship now. If he gives up on getting her back, she will lose attraction for him for assuming that other guys are better than him.
- If her ex was jealous and controlling in the relationship with her, she might want to test him to see if he’s changed. If he has and is now more confident and self-assured, she will feel a renewed sense of respect and attraction for him and may open herself up to getting back together with him.
Yet, here’s the thing…
It’s not important what your ex is doing.
What matters is what you are doing.
If you interact with her and re-spark her feelings for you, she will be back in your arms, regardless of how serious her relationship might seem right now.
So, take action and get her back now.
Avoid These 3 Mistakes Whether Her New Relationship is Serious or Not
You can still get an ex woman back, even if her relationship is serious.
However, if you make one or more of the following mistakes, it will result in her feeling turned off and less interested in you.
1. Asking her if she is serious with him or not
That just makes you look desperate and like you’re waiting in the wings for her relationship to fail, so she can then hopefully give you another chance.
This causes her to lose even more respect and attraction for you because women aren’t attracted to, or impressed by desperation in men.
Additionally, it can cause her to put up her defenses and say, “I don’t owe you an explanation. My new relationship is none of your business.”
She then closes herself off even more, making it difficult for you to continue interacting with her so that you can reactivate her feelings for you and get her back.
2. Seeming sad, lost and lonely without her
Although it’s perfectly normal to feel some sadness after a breakup, letting your ex see that you’re struggling to cope without her usually turns her off even more.
Her instincts kick in and she perceives him as being emotionally weak and wimpy because he’s unable to cope with a simple setback (i.e. the break up) in his life.
She may then feel more attracted to her new guy (even if he’s not her ideal match) because he seems so much more manly than her ex who is falling apart.
3. Only acting like a friend towards her because you feel awkward about flirting with her
If you act friendly or neutral around your ex, she will probably only ever have friendly, non-sexual feelings for you.
She will then focus on building a serious relationship with her new guy, or if he’s not what she really wants in a man, she may dump him and move on to the next guy.
In either case, she will almost certainly not come back to you, if she doesn’t feel sexually attracted to you anymore.
This is why it’s very important that you use interactions to flirt with her and make her feel sparks of attraction for you again.
A lot of guys worry that if they flirt with an ex woman she will get angry and then he will lose any chance he might have with her.
Yet, the opposite is usually true.
The truth is, there are no rules that say you can’t flirt with an ex.
In fact, it’s one of the fastest ways to make her have sexual and romantic feelings for you again and want you back.
4. Waiting and remaining single in the hope that her relationship will end and she will then want you back
In most cases, even if a woman’s rebound relationship doesn’t work out, she usually won’t go back to an ex who hasn’t done anything to reactivate her feelings for him.
In other words, she’s more likely to move forward and find a new man, than move backward and get into a relationship with an ex she has lost respect, attraction and love for.
So, if you want your ex back, don’t waste time waiting for her and hoping that her new relationship isn’t serious or that it will end soon.
If you do, not only do you risk losing her for real if she ends up marrying or falling pregnant with the new guy, you also put yourself in a position where you begin to lose confidence in your attractiveness as a man.
Then, not only do you seem unattractive to your ex when she interacts with you (i.e. because your negative thinking will come through in your tonality, body language, actions and behavior), you will also turn other women off as well.
Remember: Women are attracted to confident men who believe in themselves and turned off by insecure men who doubt themselves.
So, if you want your ex back, don’t sit around waiting for her to come back to you and end up losing your confidence and her along the way.
Take action now, before it’s too late.
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