How can you get your ex-girlfriend, fiancé or wife to forgive your mistakes and give you another chance?
Essentially you need to go through these three steps.
- Show her that you’ve learnt from your mistakes and have already changed.
- Educate her on the reality of relationships.
- Get her to forgive you for her own benefit.
1. Show her that you’ve learnt from your mistakes and have already changed
The first part of getting her to forgive you is giving her some evidence that you really have changed, because if you can’t show her that, everything else that you’re saying to her really isn’t going to sound that authentic and believable.
She’s going to be thinking, “Well yeah, you’re saying all these nice things but how can I believe you? You haven’t even changed. You’re still the same guy that I broke up with. You’re still stuck at the same level that you were at when I broke up with you.”
Some quick examples of how to show your ex that you’ve learnt from your mistakes are, if a guy was insecure and that was one of the main reasons why she broke up with him, he needs to now start showing her that he’s emotionally secure. He’s emotionally strong.
Another example is where a guy lacked purpose in life and because he lacked goals and ambitions in life, he focused way too much on her. He made his whole life about her and was clingy and needy and controlling, jealous etc.
To show her that he’s learned from his mistakes and he’s started to change, he needs to let her see that he now has some big goals and ambitions in life and he’s starting to make some progress towards that.
He doesn’t have to have achieved his goals and ambitions already, but he needs to have started to make progress towards that.
Another example is where a woman broke up with a guy because there was always constant arguing and fighting and misunderstandings and she was just sick of it. Their relationship was just too stressful, too annoying, too frustrating, too irritating, and she just turned her back on her guy, and then she left him.
So, to let her see that he’s learned from his mistakes and he’s started to change, what needs to happen is when he interacts with her from now on, he needs to be able to create some smiling and laughter and good vibes when they’re talking to each other.
When she says things that would normally piss him off or irritate him and make him want to argue and get angry, he instead laughs and turns it into something to laugh about together, to joke about together and they end up smiling and laughing and feeling good.
He doesn’t have to do that with everything that she says, but he needs to show her that he’s started to make some changes and that it’s no longer so stressful to be talking to him. When she talks to him now she’s smiling and laughing. It feels good to be interacting with him.
2. Educate her on the reality of relationships
The second part of getting your woman to forgive your mistakes is to educate her on the reality of relationships.
What I mean by the “reality of relationships” is that a lot of people go through life with a mistaken idea of how relationships should work, rather than how they actually work in reality.
For example: some people think that if they’re in a relationship and there are mistakes that have been made, there’s a loss of respect and attraction and love, it means that the other person isn’t the one and have to turn their back, walk away and never look back again.
Yet that isn’t how real relationships work.
Successful couples who stay together for life, they love each other patiently, they forgive each other constantly, as long as the other person in the relationship is always trying to become better and is learning from their mistakes and becoming a better person as a result.
Of course, if you’ve been broken up with by a woman, then you most likely made mistakes and kept making those mistakes over and over and over again, and she’s at the point now where she’s sick of that.
Yet, that was you before, not now.
You can learn from your mistakes and become a better man as a result.
You don’t have to keep making the same mistakes over and over and over and over again.
You are capable of learning from your mistakes and starting to do things right from now on.
Now when you’re explaining that to your woman, it’s important that you’re not using that as the main reason why she should get back with you.
For example: You shouldn’t be saying to her, “Hey, everyone makes mistakes and I can learn from my mistakes, so we should be back together. We don’t need to turn our backs on each other and walk away.”
That isn’t enough for most women to want to give the relationship another chance. You’ve also got to show her that you’ve changed, you’ve started to learn from your mistakes and that you really can make her feel differently now.
When she interacts with you she laughs, she smiles, she feels good. She feels respect for you, she feels attracted to you and she’s starting to feel love for you again.
When that happens, she starts to pay more attention and place more value on what you’ve said. She starts to understand the hang on.
The way that some people think about relationships where they say that if there are mistakes and there’s a breakup, you have to turn away and walk away and never look back, that’s actually wrong.
It’s actually possible to fall out of love with someone or to feel turned off by them, and for them then to change and become a better person, and for the feelings to then come flooding back.
It’s also possible for the relationship to be even better than it was before, because the guy’s not making the rookie mistakes that he used to make in the past.
You need to be able to explain to her that we all start out at a rookie level, at a beginner level when it comes to relationships.
Some guys learn a bit faster than others and some women learn a bit faster than others, but what makes a relationship last for life is when both people become better for each other over time.
Obviously if you been broken up with, you didn’t become better for her over time, but that was you before, not now.
3. Get her to forgive you for her own benefit
The final part of getting her to forgive you is to get her to forgive you for her own benefit.
What you need to explain to her is that if she doesn’t forgive you, and she goes into another relationship, she’s going to be carrying unnecessary baggage into her next relationship and it’s going to cause problems for her.
Let her know that the mature way to handle a breakup is to actually forgive each other, rather than holding onto grudges and having unnecessary baggage as a result. Let her know that she’s going to feel lighter, she’s going to feel better if she can just accept the fact that you did make mistakes.
You weren’t perfect at everything that you said and did in the relationship. You did make some mistakes, but you know what? It’s nothing that she needs to hold against you for life.
You and her had some great times.
You did feel good with each other.
You then stuffed things up, but that doesn’t mean she needs to hold that against you for life and feel negative and angry and resentful towards you for life, because that’s just not going to be good for her.
Now of course, some guys watching this might be thinking, “Huh? Moving on to her next relationship, no baggage? Does that mean that I’m telling her to move on?”
This is one of the really cool things about getting your woman to forgive you.
When you give her that freedom to not have baggage in her future relationship and she forgives you as a result of that, she stops looking at you in a negative way. She stops thinking about the mistakes that you made in a bad way.
She stops looking at you with that resentment.
She starts to look at you in a more positive light.
Her guard starts to come down, and when her guard comes down and she’s more open to you, you can then start making her feel a renewed sense of respect and attraction for you, and when you do that, she’ll start to reconnect with the love.
When you get to that point of the reconciliation process, you’ve got to be confident and guide her back into a relationship with you. Don’t give up, don’t feel like it’s impossible. You can do it. Guys all over the world get their women back every day, and you can do it too.
In some cases, the woman remains cold and distant and doesn’t make it easy for her guy to get back with her, but it can be done as long as you focus on making her feel respect and attraction for you again.
Every interaction that you have with her from now on, use it as an opportunity to make her feel something for you. Make her feel some respect and attraction. When you do that, she’ll start to reconnect with the love again and you can then guide her back into a relationship with you.
By the way, if you need more help getting your woman back and you’d like to follow a proven step-by-step system, I recommend that you watch my amazing program, Get Your Ex Back Super System. Guys all over the world have been using it to get women back, and you can do it to.
You Can Get Her to Forgive You Now, Not Months or Years From Now
I don’t recommend that you waste time ignoring your ex and feeling like it’s going to take a lot of time for her to forgive you.
You can get a woman to forgive you very quickly.
If she’s being sensitive about it and she’s being a pain in the butt and saying, “I don’t know if I can forgive you,” you need to turn that into a bit of a joke. You need to turn it into something to laugh about.
So for example, if she’s saying, “I don’t know if I’m ready to forgive you,” you should laugh and say, “Ha! When are you going to be ready, in 100 years? Is it going to take you another 50 years? You’re maybe going to have to have gray hairs first before you can forgive me? Come on, you’re stronger than that. You’re capable of forgiving. You can continue holding on to resentment and not having that emotional strength to forgive me, but it’s not going to help you now or in the long run. You’re a strong girl, you can forgive me, people forgive each other after breakups, you can do it. It’s going to make you feel better, so there’s no point delaying it and feeling miserable as a result. There’s no point harboring a grudge against me because I made some mistakes in a relationship…we all make mistakes.”
You need to let her see that holding onto the resentment is an immature thing to do, and it’s also an ineffective thing to do.
It’s not going to help her to continue holding any resentment or negative feelings towards you, it’s actually going to make her feel better to forgive you. When she forgives you, her guard naturally comes down.
That’s the beautiful thing about the psychology of forgiveness.
When she forgives you, her guard comes down and she becomes open to looking at you in a positive light and having some feelings for you.
As long as you’re using every interaction that you have with her to make her feel something for you, then you’re going to be rebuilding her feelings and you’re going be able to guide her back into a relationship with you.
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