Here’s how to get your girlfriend back after she broke up with you for being weak and too emotionally sensitive…
1. Identify the real reason for your emotional sensitivity
There are many reasons why a guy might be emotionally weak or sensitive in a relationship with his woman (e.g. he doesn’t believe he’s good enough for her, he’s afraid of losing her and not being able to find another woman who will want him, he’s insecure about his future prospects, he wasn’t loved as a child, he has been dumped by women he really loved).
Guys don’t always have strong male role models who help educate them about women and about how to be a confident, emotionally masculine man.
So, most of the time, a guy will get a lot of his information about what a woman wants in a man, from TV talk shows, sitcoms, movies, from women’s magazines or the internet and lastly, from women themselves.
Getting advice from women about how to be successful with women is usually a recipe for rejection.
Watch this video for some classic examples of how women lie to men about what they really want…
Due to political correctness and the desire not to teach men how to attract them for sex and a relationship, women usually say the opposite of what they really want in a man.
For example: A guy may have heard a woman (on TV or in real life) say something like, “In today’s world, there’s nothing wrong with a woman having a successful career and being the boss, while the man stays at home and takes care of the family. If I want my man to stay home and raise the children, he should do it. I don’t think there’s anything from with a househusband who does all the cooking and cleaning” or “I’m don’t like macho guys who are always so strong and in control. I just want to find a nice guy who can cry and share his emotions with me for a change.”
If a guy is inexperienced in relationships or doesn’t really know how to attract and pick up women on purpose (i.e. he relies on getting lucky), he may file this piece of “important” information from women in his mind for future use when he finds himself in a relationship.
When he finally finds himself a woman, he will likely do what he believes is the right thing (e.g. allowing her to be the more dominant one and make all the decisions in the relationship for both of them).
He may also be of the mindset that being emotionally masculine (i.e. having the ability to handle a problem without becoming overwhelmed by it and not breaking down like a woman does) is wrong and will be seen as heartless or uncaring by his woman.
In his mind, he’s thinking that he’s being the perfect modern man because he’s so nice, sweet, sensitive and caring.
Yet, in most cases, rather than think, “My guy is every woman’s dream! He’s just so perfect. I’d better hold on to him,” a woman will usually be thinking, “I need a real man. I don’t think he has it in him to be like that. He’s just so sensitive…almost like a woman. For once, I’d like to be able to sit back and enjoy being a woman around him, knowing that he is taking care of things. I’m tired of always being the one who has to lead, make all the big decisions and be his shoulder to cry on. Isn’t it supposed to be the other way around? Aren’t men supposed to be the tough ones? I’m tired of taking care of him like he’s a little boy. This just isn’t working out. I need a man.”
Even though she might have initially liked his emotional sensitivity at the start (especially if her ex boyfriend didn’t express his emotions at all), she will become sick and tired of it.
Women want a man who is balanced, rather than a guy who is on an extreme end of the personality scale (e.g. a really nice guy or a bad boy).
The ideal man is a good man who is emotionally strong and isn’t afraid to express his love for her, but who doesn’t actually need her to feel confident about himself.
He is a man of purpose (i.e. he has big goals that he is following through on that are important to him), so he doesn’t rely on her for his sense of identity and worthiness in the world.
He is his own man, while also being a good, loving man to her.
That’s what women want.
So, if your girlfriend broke up with you because you were weak and too emotionally sensitive, it could be because you (like most guys who get dumped for that reason), truly felt as though you were giving her the attraction experience she really wanted.
You might have thought that she’d love how emotional you were and see it as cute, adorable or real.
Yet, she saw it as weak and it turned her off because women are attracted to emotional strengths in men and turned off by emotional weaknesses.
Women don’t go around saying that though.
Unfortunately, most of the things women say about what they want from a man aren’t really true (e.g. “I want a nice guy who listens, does what I tell him to do and treats me like a princess” and then she dumps a guy for being like that because he seems desperate).
The fact is, although women won’t openly admit it, for them to be able to feel respect, attraction and love for a man, they need him to be the more emotionally strong and dominant one.
Some women do have more of a masculine personality and feel happier taking on the masculine role in a relationship, but the majority of women don’t.
So, if you want to get your girlfriend back, you have to identify your reasons for being emotionally weak and sensitive and take action to change and become the kind of man she can now look up to, respect and feel attracted to.
One of the ways you can do that is to…
2. Become emotionally stronger
In a relationship, a woman wants to know that her man is emotionally strong enough to handle whatever life throws at him.
If he can remain calm under pressure (e.g. when he’s faced with tough decisions, something bad happens or she teases him or insults him) and not become overwhelmed with emotion like a woman, she will naturally feel a profound respect and attraction for him.
On the other hand, if a guy falls apart, becomes overly emotional, insecure, anxious and loses his confidence when he is faced with a tough decision or some other challenge in his life, a woman will perceive him as being emotionally weak and her respect and attraction for him will begin to fade.
She may then begin to think, “Is a weak-minded, wimpy guy the best that I can do for myself? Do I have to settle and just put up with it? No…I don’t want to spend my life with a man who isn’t going to be emotionally strong enough for me. I’m capable of taking care of myself, but that doesn’t mean I want to do that when in a relationship with a guy. I want a guy I can look up to and depend on to be strong when things get rough. I want to be his girl and feel safe in the knowledge that he’s in the lead and taking care of both of us,” and she will then break up with him and try to move on.
So, if your girlfriend broke up with you because you were weak and too emotionally sensitive, one of the ways to get her respect back, is by interacting with her and showing her that you’re emotionally stronger now.
Naturally, that doesn’t mean you put on an act and pretend to be a tough guy by treating her badly, being rude or being heartless about things.
It also doesn’t mean that you say something along the lines of, “You broke up with me because you said I was weak and too emotionally sensitive. Well I’m not that guy anymore. I’m emotionally strong now. How about we get back together now that I’ve changed?” because she’s not going to believe you.
The best way to show her is by maintaining your confidence and being calm and in control, no matter what she says or does (e.g. insults you, teases you, says she has no feelings for you, mentions other guys who like you) to try and goad you into reacting like the old you (e.g. get upset, beg and plead with her to give you a chance, cry).
When you can do show her that you have changed (rather than tell her), she will naturally feel respect and attraction for you whether she likes it or not.
Initially, she may act as though the new man that you’ve become does not impress her, but deep down she’ll probably be feeling surges of respect for you for facing your insecurities and taking positive steps to improve yourself and become a better man.
Remember: You don’t need to be perfect to get her back.
You just need to be better than you were and then getting back together again becomes something she wants too.
The next step to getting your girlfriend back after she broke up with you for being weak and too emotionally sensitive is to…
3. Interact with her on a phone call to make her feel respect and attraction to the new and improved you
If you want to get your girlfriend back, don’t go around thinking, “There’s no hope. How can I expect her to want to give me another chance after I turned her off by being so weak and emotionally sensitive? It’s just too late. She won’t even want to talk to me over the phone or in person, so I have no chance. I just don’t know what to do. Is it really possible that she might want to talk to me again, or should I give her a few weeks/months of space to let things calm down between us? Maybe if I give her space, she will realize how great of a guy I was and reach out to me.”
Yet, that approach rarely works.
In almost all ex back cases, if a guy wants his woman back, he has to actively go about getting her back, rather than just ignoring her and hoping that she comes back on her own.
If she is turned off by you, she isn’t going to be in a hurry to get back with you until you show her that she can feel turned on by you again.
To do that, you need to interact with her over the phone and show her your confidence and emotional strength by using humor to pass her tests (e.g. she acts cold, bitchy or distant to see if you’re still the same emotionally sensitive guy she broke up with) and change her perception of you.
The more you can remain calm (no matter what she says to throw you off) and continue making her laugh and smile and feel good to be talking to you, the more respect and attraction she will feel for the new and improved you.
She will sense your strength without you having to say, “I’m stronger now. I’m not sensitive like I used to be. Please give me another chance.”
She will naturally open up to the idea of giving you another chance because she will notice that you’ve manned up and are no longer the weak, emotionally wimpy guy that she dumped.
So, rather than looking for excuses to get off the phone as quickly as possible, she will think something like, “Okay, well this is a surprise. I like it. He’s more confident and fun now than he was at the very beginning of our relationship when he was still on his best behavior and trying to impress me. Regardless of what I do to make him crumble and revert back to the weak, wimpy, emotionally sensitive guy I broke up with, he remains calm, relaxed and confident. I would never have believed it if I hadn’t experienced it for myself, but he really has changed. He’s now the kind of man I always wanted him to be. I’m actually starting to believe we can work things out between us after all. Maybe we don’t need to remain broken up. Maybe it would be fun to get back together and experience the new him. I like it that’s for sure.”
So, don’t waste time feeling hopeless and giving your girlfriend lots of unnecessary space to get over her negative feelings for you and remember the good times.
If she can’t experience your confidence and emotional strength first hand (i.e. on a phone call or in person), she’s just going to assume you’re still the same weak, emotionally sensitive guy she broke up with and she’ll usually just try to forget about you and move on.
You need to get her on a phone call with you right away and re-spark her feelings of respect and attraction for the new you.
4. Don’t try to get her back right away. Just meet up with her in person to let her experience the new you
It’s only natural that if things are going well between you and your girlfriend over the phone, you will want to say something like, “Hey, this is great. I’m so happy that we’re talking again. As you can tell, I’ve figured out where I went wrong and I’ve definitely learned my lesson. How about we give our relationship another shot?”
Take it easy.
A better way to go about getting her back is by meeting up with her and allowing her to experience the new and improved you in person.
The more that she can see your confidence and emotional strength in action (e.g. when she’s sitting opposite you in a coffee shop and pretending not to have feelings for you anymore. When she’s flirting with other guys in front of you. When you’re ordering coffee or food from the waiter), the more her respect and attraction will grow.
Then, getting back together with you will be something she actually wants to do too because it feels good to her.
She is proud of who you have become and can actually start to look up to you as a man that can be relied on, rather than a man that she needs to carry throughout life.
So, let her experience the new you and want you back before asking for a relationship.
If you try to make her commit to getting back together again right away, she’ll likely dig in her heels and say “No,” because a phone call is usually not enough to fully reactivate her feelings for you.
This is why meeting up with her is a very important step to getting her back, because she will then be able to really see that you have changed and she now feels better around you.
From there, you need to…
5. Get her to forgive the old you
Forgiveness is an important step to being able to fully start over with your ex girlfriend and have an even better relationship this time around.
So, if she doesn’t forgive you, it will make the process of getting her back a lot more difficult because she will keep her guard up and won’t allow herself to feel much (or any) respect, attraction and love for you.
If you don’t get her to forgive you and begin asking for a relationship, a woman will usually say things like, “I don’t know. How can I trust you? What if I say yes to getting back together again and then you go back to being weak and emotionally sensitive as soon as we have an argument? I don’t have the energy or desire to go through that again.”
So, make sure that you get her forgiveness first.
How can you do that?
By saying something along the lines of, “I now understand why you broke up with me. Looking back at myself and how weak and emotionally sensitive I was, I can only laugh at myself when I admit that it was really me. How silly of me. I mean, how could you not feel turned off by me when I was being like that? I know understand that it was immature of me to behave in that way. I also accept that it might be difficult for you to believe that I have changed, but I have. So, can you forgive me? Can you let go of the past and allow us both to move forward in a mature, positive way? I’m not asking you to forgive me so that we can get back together again. I just want you to forgive me so you can let go of the grudge you hold against me in your mind. Let go of the baggage so you can feel free and light as a person, rather than being angry at me or hating me for who I became. Then, we can at least be friends from now on, rather than being ex’s who hold grudges against each other. I mean, I made a mistake. I get it. So, it’s not something that you need to hold against me. If you do hold it against me, it will only hurt you. You will feel so much lighter and happier if you can just forgive me for making that silly mistake.”
If you can get her to the point where she really does forgive you, it makes her drop her guard and allows her to feel comfortable around you again.
She no longer stops herself from feeling attracted to you, or feeling respectful towards you.
Then, when she interacts with you and sees that you really have changed, the idea of being your girl again doesn’t seem as far-fetched to her as it did before.
Remember: If she loved you before, it means that the love will still be there in the background and waiting to be reactivated.
You can switch her feelings back on by being confident, easy-going and relaxed and making her laugh and feel good to be around you again.
If you do that, she will stop thinking of you as the emotionally weak and sensitive guy you used to be and start falling in love with the strong man that you are now.