The main rule of texting a woman is to keep things pretty short and to the point and then either arrange an in-person meetup, or get on a phone or video call.

If a woman likes you and is texting you, she will almost always be hoping that you have the confidence to arrange a meetup.

So, don’t spend loads of time texting her to ‘make sure.’

If she’s texting back, she likes you, so make a move.

Alternatively, you can get on a phone or video call.

A phone call speeds up the process of then getting her to agree to meet up with you in person, where you can then attract her properly and escalate to a kiss, sex and then relationship.

However, if you waste a lot of time (e.g. days, weeks or months) texting a woman, there’s no guarantee that she will wait around for you.

If another guy comes along and gets her to meet up with him and have sex with him, you may be forgotten and left behind regardless of how long you’ve been texting with her.

Some Dos and Don’ts of Texting

So, how do you keep things short and then move to a phone call, date, sex and relationship?

First off…

1. Do text her to let her know you’re interested in her.

What to text a woman - don't try to play it cool

A lot of guys who get a phone number from a woman, or match with her on a dating app are worried about looking too keen or interested.

Yet, here’s what you need to remember if you want to be successful with women…

Prior to sex, you simply have an opportunity to be with her.

To her, you are just another guy that she’s given her number to or matched with and MAY be interested in being with.

So, don’t waste time trying to act cool by not texting her for a long time.

If you get her number, text her the same day or night.

If you match with her on a dating app, text right away and don’t try to ‘play it cool’ by taking your time to reply.

If you do, she may begin chatting to another guy she’s matched with, who might then ask her out on a date.

If that happens, she might stop texting you.

Here’s an example of what to do, if you just met an attractive woman (e.g. at a party, bar or club, through mutual friends) and she gave you her phone number.

Before you walk away, say, “Okay, great to meet you. I’ll send you a text or give you a call soon.”

Then text her right away, or the next day if you want to:

  • The same night: Hi Linda, it’s Dan here. I just wanted to say hello so you’ve got my number too. Chat to you soon.
  • The next day: Hey, Dan here. It was great meeting you the other night. I’ll call you early this week.
  • The next day: Hey Linda. Dan from the other night (the very handsome guy at the bar). I hope you’re having a great day. Chat to you soon – I’ll give you a call tomorrow or the next day.

Sending her a text like that serves two purposes:

  1. Now she has your number and can text you or call you if she wants to.
  2. She is clear about your interest in her and doesn’t have to waste a lot of time wondering if you’re ever going to contact her or not.

It’s great that you’ve gotten her number and have sent the first text, but just remember that prior to sex, there are no guarantees that she will remain interested in you.

If you want to be successful at having lovers or getting a girlfriend, you’ve got to move things forward to sex as soon as possible, rather than wasting a lot of time with sex.

Today’s dating scene doesn’t work in the same way as it did for your grandparents or their parents.

Back in the old days, a man could court a woman for months and she would remain loyal to him because sex before marriage was forbidden.

Yet, in today’s world, people can and o have sex right away.

So, if you waste a lot of time texting a woman, another guy will simply come along, have sex with her and start an actual relationship.

Their sexual encounter may then lead to a long term relationship, or even marriage and you will have then lost your chance with her.

2. Don’t text her all the time.

What to text a woman - don't text her too much

Imagine you sent her an initial text and she replied saying, “Hey Dan. It was nice meeting you too. I look forward to hearing from you.”

What do you do next?

Some guys will take this as a sign that she’s interested (which she is) and then make the mistake of texting her repeatedly as a way to stay on her mind and keep reminding her about how much he likes her.

Bad move.

For example: A guy might start sending her texts about what he’s up to during the day, keep telling her how beautiful she is, how his heart beats faster when he thinks about her, or even how glad he is that he’s finally met a girl who seems right for him.

In his mind, he’s being romantic and he’s hoping that this will make her like him even more and she will then be willing to go out on a date with him.

Yet, if he hasn’t even kissed her, a modern woman is usually going to find this type of texting creepy, weird or desperate.

Of course, unattractive women or some young girls who lack experience with dating and relationships may enjoy his attention for a little while, but almost all other women won’t be charmed by that texting style.

Most women will take it as a sign that he’s desperate, or lacks experience with women and therefore, probably won’t be a fun boyfriend to have.

If she gets that impression of him, an attractive woman will usually begin to think that he’s not the type of guy she wants in her life.

So, if you don’t want her to think you’re a desperate, needy guy who hasn’t got any other options with women besides her, simply relax and don’t get too carried away texting her several times a day.

No matter how tempting it might be, just remain calm and only text her to make her feel attracted and then arrange a meetup.

Don’t text her just to chat, or to get to know each other further.

That is done on the date.

3. Do text her in a confident, masculine manner.

What to text a woman - text her in a confident, masculine way

Women are attracted to our masculinity.

So, a woman doesn’t ever want to see you thinking, acting, feeling, talking, behaving, responding or texting as a girl would.

She wants you to embrace your masculinity and be manly, even if she is being really girly around you, or while texting you.

For example: Some men (even though they are in their 20s, 30s, 40s or 50s) will copy the texting style of a young girl texting things like:

  • im l8t c u in 15
  • r u bizzee?
  • c u l8r
  • OMG…u r funny 2 nite
  • c u soon …xoxoxo ❤️ 🤗 🥰

Will a woman perceive a guy as being masculine if he texts her in that way?

Of course not.

She’s going to think of him as being a bit immature and lacking in masculinity.

Compare that to a guy who cleaned up his texting style and texted like a mature man:

  • I’m running late. See you in 15.
  • Are you busy right now?
  • See you later.
  • Haha…you’re funny tonight.
  • See you soon 😉

See the difference?

The first examples look like texts from a little boy or girl, while the second examples have been cleaned up to be more mature, masculine and classy.

Remember: Women feel attracted to your masculinity. It’s what they want to see, feel and experience.

So, when you text a woman, make sure that your texting style is that of a confident, masculine man.

For example:

The wrong way for a guy to text a woman would be, “Hey, i lyke u. u wanna go on a d8t wit me?” while the right way would be, “Hey Jenny – great meeting you the other night. I’ll give you a call soon.”

In the first example, not only does the guy come across as being girly and childish, which is a turn off for most women, but he is also asking a woman out on a date via text, which is a definite no-no.

In the second exammple, the guy sounds strong, confident and in control; all qualities that are sexually attractive to women.

Women want guys who behave like men, not like little girly boys who want to behave in a cutesy way, hoping to fit in and be liked by acting like her.

4. Don’t use texting as an excuse not to arrange a meetup.

Some guys get a woman’s phone number or match with her on a dating app, but after making the initial effort to text her, they freeze up and stop there.

In many cases, the guy lacks confidence in his ability to attract her in person, or keep her interested in a relationship once it begins.

So, he just keeps texting.

Eventually, she stops replying.

Keep Your Eyes on the Prize

Knowing what to text to a woman is very important, but you also need to keep in mind what the goal of texting is.

It’s to arrange a meetup, so you and her can then kiss, have sex and start an actual relationship.

It might feel good to text back and forth for days, weeks or months, but it’s nothing compared to the feeling of holding her in your arms, kissing her, having sex and enjoying the pleasure of a loving, committed relationship.

So, when you get a woman’s phone number or match with her on a dating app, make her feel attracted via text and then arrange a meetup.

Don’t waste time texting and hoping that if you just keep texting, she will suddenly say, “I love you! I want to be with you. Let’s meet up” and you then won’t have to risk suggesting the meetup.

In almost all cases, a guy will lose his opportunity with the woman if he waits for that.

Eventually, she will get bored and annoyed that he just keeps texting her and will either stop replying to hopefully get him to feel motivated to ask her out, or stop replying because she is no longer interested.

Text Attraction by Dan Bacon

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