It depends on the following:
1. If she meets a new guy that she finds interesting and attractive
A woman will usually have her reasons for breaking up with a guy (e.g. he didn’t make her feel attracted in the ways that she wanted, certain aspects of his thinking and behavior turned her off, the relationship became boring and dull).
So, if after the break up she happens to quickly meet a new guy who seems so much more interesting and fascinating than her ex, she will focus on moving on with him, rather than going back to a relationship she no longer feels excited about.
This is why, it’s up to you to make sure you don’t wait around for that to happen.
Instead, you need to begin interacting with her as soon as possible (preferably over the phone and in person) and start re-sparking her sexual and romantic feelings for you, so that no other guy looks like a better choice compared to you.
For example: Some of the ways you can do that are by…
Believing in yourself and in your value to her and feeling confident of your chances of getting her back, rather than doubting yourself and thinking negative thoughts like, “What if she doesn’t want me?” or, “What if I contact her and she rejects me?” and then making her feel turned off as a result.
Showing her via your attitude, conversation style, actions, behavior and the way you respond to her that you’re a new and improved man that she can now truly look up to, respect, feel attracted to and love, rather than staying the same as before and expecting her to accept that.
Maintaining your confidence with her regardless of what she says or does to make you doubt yourself and your chances with her.
Not giving her power over you (e.g. by doing everything she tells you to do, accepting her decision about the break up, being too nice and submissive) and instead, letting her see that you are now even more emotionally masculine in the way you think, talk, behave and react when interacting with her and that she can’t dominate you with her confident personality.
Making her smile and laugh and feel happy and relaxed to be around you again, rather than stressing her out and putting her on her guard around you by constantly trying to get into intense, deep discussions about the relationship with her.
Flirting with her to create sexual tension between you and to make it clear to her that you still feel attracted to her and want her back, rather than ‘playing it safe’ by just acting friendly, neutral or distant and pretending that you only want to be her friend from now on.
This allows her to feel a renewed sense of respect and attraction for you.
At the same time, she feels curious and intrigued about the new you and wants to explore the possibility of being your girl again, rather than cutting you off and then potentially regretting it later on.
As a result, she drops her guard with you and becomes open to talking to you, hanging out with you and seeing where things go from there.
Another possibility is…
2. If she gets into a relationship that works and that keeps getting better over time
If a woman finds herself in a relationship with a guy who doesn’t make her feel the way she wants to feel when she’s with him (e.g. loved and appreciated, turned on, excited, like a girly, feminine woman), then she will eventually get to the point where she breaks up with him.
She will then try to find a new man who will firstly, fill in the gaps that were missing in her relationship with her ex (e.g. he’s more confident and self-assured, he is more ambitious and goal oriented, he’s more emotionally dominant than her, he makes her feel loved and appreciated).
Of course that’s not a guarantee that he’s perfect for her and that she will stay with him for very long.
However, if he can also create a relationship dynamic that deepens the feelings of love, attraction and respect between them over time and causes her to want to stay with him for life, its highly unlikely that she will feel the need to go back to her ex again.
This is why it’s so important that if you want to get your ex back, you don’t waste time waiting for her to come back to you on her own and giving her a chance to meet, fall in love with and settle down with a new man.
Don’t make the mistake of thinking that it’s all up to her whether you get back together again.
It’s up to you.
You need to quickly make some attractive changes to your thinking, behavior and the way you respond to her and then interact with her and allow her to experience those changes over the phone and in person
It’s only when you re-attract your ex and let her experience new, exciting feelings that she opens back up to being with you again.
Even if she said that her decision was final and she was never, ever going to get back with you, or she seems cold and aloof towards you at first, all that will change when she begins to feel strong surges of respect and sexual attraction for you again.
When that happens, she begins to feel sparks of sexual and romantic love for you again and starts to fear that she could be making a mistake if she walks away from you for real.
At that point, it’s easy to get to a hug, kiss, have sex and then back into a relationship.
However, if you just sit around waiting for her to make the first move and don’t do anything to reactivate her feelings for you, she will almost certainly move on and may possibly end up in a relationship that works and keeps getting better and better over time.
If that happens, getting her back becomes a lot more difficult for you.
So, if you want your ex back, take action and make it happen before it’s too late.
Another possibility is…
3. If you don’t contact her and re-attract her
Sometimes a guy feels too nervous or even unwelcome to contact his ex after a break up.
This is especially true if the break up was messy, or if the woman said things like, “It’s over between us and I don’t want to see you or hear from you again. Just leave me alone so that I can get on with my life!”
He might then decide to use the No Contact Rule (i.e. ignore her for 30 to 60 days) as a way of making her miss him and begin wanting him back.
Unfortunately though, what a guy like that doesn’t realize is that when a woman has lost touch with her feelings of respect, attraction and love for him, not hearing from him for a long period of time isn’t really going to bother her.
In fact, in most cases, when a woman doesn’t hear from an ex she doesn’t have any feelings for, rather than miss him and want to go back to him, she will likely just think something along the lines of, “I’m so relieved! I really thought I was going to have a difficult time getting my ex to accept the break up, but it seems I was wrong. He’s disappeared completely out of my life and I didn’t even have to be a bitch to him to make it happen. I can now move on and find myself a new man, without still having to deal with my ex as well.”
Even if a woman does still have some feelings for her ex and is secretly hoping they will eventually work things out and get back together again, when he completely vanishes from her life, she may take it as a sign that he’s no longer interested in her.
She might even think things like, “I really thought he cared, but clearly I was wrong. He hasn’t even bothered to text me once to see how I’m doing. Well I’m not going to give him the satisfaction of hurting me again. I’m going to put my feelings for him away and I’m going to find myself a new man to have sex with and fall in love with.”
This is why it’s so important that if you want to get your ex back, you don’t waste time ignoring her for months and risking losing her forever.
Here’s the thing…
If your ex has lost feelings for you, giving her more time is unlikely to change that.
Interacting with her over the phone and particularly in person and reactivating her feelings of respect and attraction for you.
On the other hand, if your ex does still care for you and you ignore her for a month or two, you will likely damage your chances of getting her back, because she will feel hurt and betrayed by you for not trying to get her back.
In either case, you stand a much better chance of getting your ex back when you take the lead and make it happen right away, rather than sitting around for weeks and months and hoping she will come back to you on her own simply because you’re not contacting her.
So, don’t wait around in the background all that time.
Waiting around isn’t good for your mental and emotional health.
Just pick up the phone, activate some of your ex’s feelings for you (e.g. by making her laugh, smile and feel good to be talking to you again) and get her to meet up with you in person and get her back for real.
Another possibility is…
4. If she misses you, but decides to move on because she doesn’t believe you could change
In most cases, a woman will continue to miss her ex from time to time.
For example: She might find herself spending the weekend home alone and think to herself something along the lines of, “I miss how we used to hole in over the weekend sometimes and just make popcorn and watch movies the whole day” or, “I miss how he used to make me laugh and smile even when I was really angry or sad. No one else can do that.”
Yet, in most cases, rather than contact her ex and see if they can work things out, a woman will instead try to fully get over him and move on. Why?
Even though she misses him, based on her past experiences (e.g. he promised to change before but was either too lazy to follow through, or he didn’t actually know how to change and was just trying to hang on to the relationship as long as possible), she doesn’t believe he can change and be the man she wants him to be.
So, rather than wasting more of her time by going back to him, she instead focuses on getting over her remaining feelings for him and moving on.
This is why, if you want your ex back, you first need to make some attractive changes to your attitude, thinking and behavior, before you interact with her again.
Then, when you are ready (it shouldn’t take more than a few days to a week), get in contact with her, re-attract her on the call and get her to meet up with you in person, so that she can fully experience the changes in you and how good it now makes her feel.
When she realizes that you really have transformed yourself into a better man (e.g. you’ve become more confident and self-assured, you’re more emotionally mature than before, you’re more assertive and can now stand up for yourself when she’s being out of line, you’re able to make her laugh and smile when she is being stubborn or closed off), she will drop her guard and open up to the idea of getting back with you.
However, if when you interact with her, her suspicions about you not being able to change are proven to be true, she’s not going to be keen waste more time on a relationship that won’t work.
Then, getting her back becomes a lot more difficult for you.
3 Mistakes to Avoid While You Wait For Your Ex to Come Back
If you want to get your ex back, make sure that you’re not making any of the following mistakes:
1. Waiting so long that you develop insecurities about women and relationships
Sometimes a guy will sit around waiting for his ex to come back to him, without actually doing anything to get her back.
Then, after a while when he notices that she’s not coming back, he begins to feel insecure about his value to her and to other women.
For example: He might…
- Start believing that his ex was out of his league and that he got lucky with her.
- Lose confidence in his attractiveness to other women and begin to see women as being hard to get, or hard to keep.
- Doubt that he will ever be able to attract another woman as beautiful as his ex ever again.
Don’t let that be you.
If you want your ex back, stop waiting around for her to come to you and end up losing confidence in yourself if that doesn’t happen.
Be a man of action and be the one who takes the lead in the ex back process.
If you wait too long, you may end up losing your ex to another man, because she gets tired of waiting for you to make a move.
You might also end up losing confidence in yourself around women, because you secretly worry that you’re unlovable.
So, make sure that you don’t become one of those guys who end up being single and alone, because one failed relationship ruined your confidence in yourself and in your value to women.
Believe in yourself.
Then, if you want your ex back, take action and make it happen.
The next mistake to avoid is…
2. Never fully opening yourself to another woman because you want your ex back
In some cases, a guy might sit around waiting for his ex to come back to him.
Then, when she doesn’t, he might force himself to move on by getting into a relationship with a new woman.
Yet, he never fully allows himself to fall in love with her, because at the back of his mind he’s still thinking about how much he misses his ex and still hoping that she might come back one day.
Deep down, he knows that he’s not living up to his true relationship potential, because he’s settled for a woman that he doesn’t really love.
She’s a nice enough person and technically there’s nothing wrong with her, but he just can’t allow himself to love her in the same way that he loved his ex.
Secretly, he wishes he could have his ex back, but he didn’t do anything about it, so she moved on.
Don’t let that happen to you.
The next mistake to avoid is…
3. Daydreaming about getting her back, but never following through to actually make it happen
There’s no value in sitting around and thinking things like, “I miss her so much. I wish she would come back to me. If she did, I would do everything in my power to make her happy. I would be a much better boyfriend/fiancé/husband to her this time around.”
Although daydreaming like that might make you feel better in the moment, it’s not going to make you happy in the long term.
However, taking action, getting your ex back for real and making those dreams a reality definitely will.
So, leave the daydreaming to the girls and take action like the man you are.
When you have your ex back in your arms, kissing her and loving her, you’ll agree that it was the right thing for you to do.
So, what are you waiting for?
Do you want her back or not?