Guys get their ex girlfriends back all the time. It’s totally possible and fairly simple when you approach it correctly.
So, if you’ve decided that you want to get your ex-girlfriend back and are serious about making it happen, there are a few essential rules that you need to know about first.
- Rule 1: She won’t want you back for real unless you first make her feel a renewed sense of sexual attraction and respect for you.
- Rule 2: You shouldn’t try to get her back before adhering to Rule 1.
Her feelings are what make all the difference when getting her back.
If she doesn’t feel attracted to you, then she’s not going to feel motivated to want to get back with you.
It won’t matter what you say to her, she just isn’t going to be willing to listen and care as much as you do because the feelings aren’t mutual.
So, if you are serious about getting her back, you must focus on attraction first…
Once your ex girlfriend feels attracted to you again, it is then so much easier to guide her back into a relationship because she has a reason (i.e. she wants to be around you, hug you, kiss you and have sex with you again) to get back with you.
If you’re trying to get her back for your reasons (e.g. “I care about you so much” or “I promise to do better. Please believe me and give me a chance”) then she’s not going to want to listen.
It has to be about her feelings.
When you focus on her feelings, she likes the new you and how you now make her feel.
She then feels like there is still something between you and her that isn’t finished.
However, if you don’t focus on attraction and hope to get her back by ignoring her, begging and pleading, texting like a friend and so on, then you will be disappointed.
I’ve personally worked on 100s of ex back cases and the #1 mistake that guys make is forgetting to focus on making her feel attracted again before attempting to get her back.
Opinions You Will Find Online
Since most advice you will find online is not written by experts who have actually helped guys to get an ex girlfriend back, you have to be careful about which approach you decided to try on your ex girlfriend.
I get a lot of e-mails from guys wanting to know how to get their ex back and most of them have already made a whole bunch of classic mistakes that they’ve learned online, which have pushed their ex-girlfriend further away.
For example: Some websites will say that you must use the No Contact Rule (ignore her for 30 to 60 days), while others will promise you that you can simply text your ex back with a magical text message.
People will tell you to ignore her for 30 or 60 days like that will be a magical number of days that fixes all relationship problems, makes her forgive you and come crawling back.
So, how much space is enough to give her before you get her back? Watch this video for the answer…
If you give her 3 to 7 days of space, it is more than enough.
It proves the point that you’re not being needy and desperate. She doesn’t have to put her guard up and tell you to go away and stop pestering her.
After giving her a week of space, you then need to contact her, re-attract her and guide her through the ex back process.
Is a Break Up the End of Your Relationship With Her?
Many guys who’ve lost their girlfriend don’t realize that most relationships have mini break ups at some stage, but manage to get back together.
It’s not unusual and you could say it’s almost “normal,” so a break up is not necessarily the end of a relationship.
Whether or not a break up is the end of your relationship with her really comes down to why you broke up. In most cases, a guy can get his girlfriend to forgive him and give him another chance very quickly. In other cases, it may take some time.
The truth is, you will always have a relationship with her in some form or another.
It’s never truly broken up completely because, just by having a history together and having been together in a 1-on-1 relationship, you still have a relationship with each other.
Also, just because she’s mad at you right now or turned off by how you behaved, it doesn’t mean she won’t lighten up to you over the next few days, weeks or months.
When you change how you make her feel (I can teach you how to do that), she will change how she feels about it. It’s a natural, normal and automatic response from a human being.
For example: If someone that you didn’t like suddenly changed the things about themselves that you didn’t like and instead, they started behaving in ways that you liked, then you would begin to like them!
You’ve probably had that experience many times in your life already. The same applies to an ex-girlfriend, except it’s easier because you are a man and she is a woman and by activating her feelings of sexual attraction and love for you again, she will begin to follow her instincts and want to give it another chance.
Why Did Your Girlfriend Break Up With You?
Was it because you took her for granted and you failed to notice the warning signs she gave you, before it was too late? Did you cheat on her or did she cheat on you?
Did you become too needy or too possessive and she ended up feeling as though she needed “some space” from you?
Whatever the reason, a lot of guys tell me that the break up caught them completely by surprise; that they didn’t see it coming and as far as they were concerned everything was fairly okay between them.
Clearly things were not fine and the truth is, most break ups don’t “sneak up” without warning. It might seem like a bolt out of the blue, but only because the guy failed to pick up on the warning signals that she was not happy.
Let’s say your girlfriend broke up with you because you took her for granted. She’s going to have fired plenty of “warning shots” to give you a heads-up, but if you failed to notice them, you need to question whether you were as emotionally involved or connected as you should have been.
Let’s say the break up was the result of an infidelity. There can be no denying that being cheated on in a relationship raises ruins the trust and kills most relationships.
If you were the one who did the cheating, you need to question whether you did enough to repair the damage done by cheating and whether she knows that genuinely don’t ever want to cheat on her again.
If she was the one who cheated on you, you need to question whether you were really able to forgive her and move on, or did you struggle to trust her and question her every move after it happened? Without trust, a relationship is destined to fail eventually.
On the subject of trust, if your insecurities – perhaps fueled by her infidelity or your suspicions of her wanting to cheat – lead to you behaving in a clingy, over-possessive way, then it’s only a matter of time before she feels suffocated by the relationship and wants some breathing space.
The more you cling to her in desperation to keep her all to yourself, the more you push her away.
Get Your Ex Girlfriend Back: What Not to Do
If your relationship has broken up and you want to get your ex-girlfriend back, you need to be a man that she wants to get back with.
Remember, she was attracted to you when you got together, but due to your behavior she lost respect and attraction for you.
You need to figure out exactly why she lost that attraction. In my program, Get Your Ex Back: Super System I explain the 70 reasons why a woman will break up with a man.
Once you know what you need to fix, you can then go about fixing that and you can have a conversation with her to get her to overlook what happened in the past and start afresh with you.
During your relationship with her, chances are that something happened to make her question whether you were the man she thought you were. Perhaps something changed in your behavior or your attitude towards her that made her begin to feel less attracted to you.
This is something that can happen in any relationship from time to time and the questions can lead to mini break ups or almost break ups while the person with the questions looks for some answers.
When relationships manage to get back together, it’s because the ex with the questions finds the right answers.
With this in mind, if you want to get your ex-girlfriend back, you need to find the right answers to the questions about why she really broke up with you and what it will take to get her back ASAP.
The guy she fell in love with and wanted to be in a relationship with was a man who “swept her off her feet” and made her feel like a woman.
You were once that man, but did you stop making her feel that way? Did you become less of a man for her, or more of a man than you were when she first met you?
If you’ve been doing any of the following, then she will have been losing faith that you can be the man in your relationship with her…
1. Begging or Pleading
One of the most common mistakes guys make when they realize their girlfriend wants to break up with them is to plead with words to the effect of, “Whatever it is you want me to do, I’ll do it” or, “I can change” or, “Just tell me what it is I did wrong and I’ll fix it.”
Yet, this is not giving her the answer she’s looking for. She wants to see that you understand and change without her having to teach you.
She doesn’t want to feel as though she has to take care of you in that way.
She wants to be with a man who makes her feel like a woman, a man who knows how to take the lead in a relationship.
If you’re asking her to tell you what you should do, you’re telling her that you’re not that man. She wants you to know what to do.
Women are not the men. They don’t want to lead us. When you make a woman lead you, it ruins the sexual dynamic between you.
2. Hounding Her With Phone Calls or Messages
If she has decided that she needs some space to find answers, you need to give her that space.
She wants a man who is mentally and emotionally strong, so if you hound her with phone calls, text messages or letters, you are not showing yourself to be that man.
She’ll respect you for giving her that space, but any respect she still had for you will quickly disappear if you hound her with phone calls, Facebook messages, Skype calls, text messages, e-mails and so on.
Your desperation to get her to change her mind will only reinforce her doubts over whether you are the man she wants to be with.
She wants a real man who stands on his own two feet in life and who is happy with or without her, so hounding her and pleading with her will only make her see you as weak.
3. Hiding Away From Your Normal Lifestyle
This is another common mistake that a lot of guys make. Some guys mistakenly think that if they shut themselves off from the world and effectively hide away to lick their wounds, he is demonstrating to her that his life is not complete without her.
A guy like this will think that by not going out and socializing, not talking to other woman and not being happy in general, they will prove to her that she’s the only woman for them and they want her back.
Guys, this is a BIG mistake on so many levels! In fact, it is the opposite of what you should be doing to get her back.
If you want to learn my 7 step system for getting an ex girlfriend back, I recommend that you watch Get Your Ex Back: Super System.
This is the only program of its kind in the world.
I tested the methods and techniques with phone coaching clients for a long time before making it available in a program because I wanted to make sure that I provided a solution that is guaranteed to work.
Now that the program is ready, you can watch it right now and start getting your ex girlfriend back immediately.
In most cases, guys are able to get their ex girlfriend back within days or a couple of weeks if it’s a really difficult case.
So, don’t wait any longer.
Get her back while you still have a chance!