Have you ever heard that women really like guys who are mysterious?
Well, they don’t mean mysterious in the creepy, lonely guy sort of way. What they mean is a guy who makes them feel attracted and seems to be interested, but they aren’t quite sure if they can get him.
Being mysterious also means that he doesn’t tell a woman absolutely everything about himself in the hope of impressing her. Instead, he lives an interesting life, has interesting opinions, but doesn’t feel the need to tell her everything.
Instead, he knows that he is impressive “as is” and doesn’t need to put on a big show to hopefully get a woman to like him. He knows that women want to be with him and he only opens up and shares everything with a woman that earns his love, trust and respect over time.
As Stu (one of the three Modern Man coaches) once said to a beautiful woman that he was having a casual, sexual relationship with, “You’re not important enough to me to warrant getting angry.” He said that in response to her asking him why he wouldn’t get angry at her when she was clearly trying to piss him off.
Stu knows that most women that he meets instantly love him and want to be his number one girl, so it’s not a big deal when he’s having a sexual relationship with a beautiful woman. She’s just another girl until she earns the right to get his full attention.
A big part of being what women refer to as a mysterious guy, is being a challenge for her to conquer when she first meets you and then gets into a relationship with you. Why? Watch this video to understand why women like guys who are a challenge…
Dan Bacon (the founder of The Modern Man) used the approach of being a challenge to get his sexy, 22-year-old girlfriend to propose to him when he was 35. Watch this video to see how Dan did it.
Mysterious Guys in Romance Novels
If you’ve ever flicked through the pages of a romantic novel, you may have noticed that there’s generally a “mysterious stranger” in there somewhere. He’s the guy who gets the leading lady’s heart pounding and it’s his mysteriousness that arouses her interest in him and continues to build the sexual tension to boiling point by the end of the book.
She can’t quite figure out how to get him to love her fully, or why he seems to be so perfect for her, but seems to have a dark side or a secret that he’s not willing to tell her just yet.
The same type of “mystery man” theme often appears in Hollywood movies, where the mysterious guy never reveals anything about himself and seems to come and go without leaving any kind of trail. For some reason, he is always the guy that women are desperate to jump into bed with, willing to divorce a husband over or willing to travel half way across the world to see.
Of course, in real life, things don’t have to be as complicated as they are in movies and TV drama shows. In real life, all woman really wants is to be able to feel sexually attracted to you, respect you as a man and be able to fall deeply in love with you over time.
Being mysterious is just ONE of many ways that you can attract a woman. For example: Women are also attracted to guys who are charismatic, charming, confident, funny, masculine and alpha.
Watch this video to understand how a woman’s attraction for a man works and how you can trigger it by displaying traits that women are naturally attracted to…
As you will discover from the video above, you can make a woman feel attracted to you in many different ways. It’s great to learn how to be a mysterious guy, but don’t put too much effort into trying to appear mysterious.
What is most important is that you actually make women feel attracted to you when they interact with you.
The Mysterious Loner
Some guys confuse the idea of being a “mysterious guy” with meaning that they should appear to be a strange loner who doesn’t seem to get along with people because he knows something that others don’t.
Yet, that’s not what women are looking for in a mysterious guy.
In movies and TV drama shows, you may have noticed that guys who sit alone at the end of bar, or are aloof and don’t get along with people at parties always seem to attract the attention of the most beautiful women in the room. In many cases (in movies and TV shows), the woman will approach the guy because she is attracted to his mysteriousness.
She will ask him, “Hey, why are you sitting alone?” or “Hi, can I sit down and join you?” and he will then continue to be aloof, awkward, brooding and even somewhat depressed. Yet, the woman will feel attracted to him.
Why? Simple…it’s a frikken movie or TV show. The writers add those types of storylines in because they are strange and it keeps people watching (i.e. some women are thinking, “Why is she interested in him?” and some guys are thinking, “Hmmm…maybe I can get girls to like me by being brooding, depressed and mysterious like that!”)
If a guy sees that type of thing in movies often enough, he might decide to try it out in real life. So, he park himself at the end of a bar on a busy Saturday night and waits for the beautiful women in the room to start approaching him.
While he’s waiting, he tries to add to his mysteriousness by keeping his back turned to the crowd and attempting to mimic the distant, faraway look the mysterious guy in the movie had on his face.
He makes sure to casually glance in the direction of any women who come into his line of sight and shoots them a look of mystery and intrigue with an expression he’s been practicing in front of a mirror.
Yet, women don’t seem to be interested. They’re not approaching him. No-one is saying, “Hey Mr. Mysterious, please come and join us!” and no beautiful woman is walking up and offering to buy him a drink.
He wonders why it doesn’t work for him, so he decides to stand against the wall and just watch the crowd. He hopes that a woman will notice him, feel attracted to his mysteriousness and then approach him.
Yet, it doesn’t work. Why?
For a start, sitting alone in a social setting does not make a guy appear to be mysterious in a positive way. Instead, it usually just makes him appear to be a loner who has no friends. Turning his back on others does not add to his air of mystery either. Instead, it simply makes him appear to be a loner who lacks the social skills to even attempt to make friends.
Trying to create a distant expression on his face does not enhance his appeal to women. They may look at him and think, “Who is that guy?” but if he doesn’t do anything to trigger the woman’s feelings of sexual attraction or curiosity, she almost certainly isn’t going to approach him for it.
Instead, she will usually just assume that he’s a loner or a social awkward guy who doesn’t fit in or who isn’t feeling comfortable in that setting.
Switching Your Focus to Simply Attracting Women, Rather Than Trying Hard to Be Mysterious
You don’t have to put on an act of being a really mysterious guy to attract women. That’s not how it works.
Attracting women is much more simple that most guys think it is. As long as you are displaying traits that naturally attract women (e.g. confidence, charisma, humor, masculine vibe, etc), women are going to feel attracted to you.
If you also want to be a bit of a challenge and be seen as a mysterious guy, then it will add some extra appeal to you, but you don’t need to go overboard with it.
The bottom line is that you want women to feel an intense desire to jump into bed with you, you need to change your thoughts from, “How to be a mysterious guy” to, “How to be an irresistibly attractive guy.”
Women are only attracted to mysterious strangers in romantic novels and they usually only approach mysterious guys in movies and TV shows. Getting approached by women by being mysterious is about as rare as winning the lottery. You will always have better odds with women if you simply approach them and let them experience your attractive personality.
Some of the qualities that make a guy’s personality attractive to women include:
If a woman likes what she sees in you, she’s going to send out signals through her body language to let you know she’s open to being approached by you.
If you don’t have the confidence to respond to those signals or you don’t have the confidence to strike up a natural, fun conversation after making an approach, you’re not going to hold her attention for long. Shy, anxious, awkward behavior that shows a guy to be insecure in any way is a complete turn off.
The most important type of masculinity to a woman is how you think, behave and take action around her and in life. If your overall vibe of masculinity makes women feel girly and feminine in your presence, you will always have your pick of women.
However, if your overall vibe makes women feel neutral (neither very feminine or very masculine), you will have to work harder to get women to feel enough attraction for you to warrant having a sexual relationship with you.
3. Social intelligence
Having the social and communication skills that it takes to mix, interact and make friends adds to a guy’s sexual appeal.
Women are instinctively drawn to men who have what it takes to be a “provider and protector” in the modern world and this means being able to network and pool resources with others when needed.
If a guy appears to be a loner, he’s showing himself to be a guy who lacks social intelligence and may in fact become a bit of a burden in a long term relationship.
What Women Really Want
Being an international man of mystery like James Bond is not what 99% of women are desperately hoping to find in a guy. To be the type of man that most women find irresistibly attractive, one of the most important mysterious things about you should be the fact that you’re available.
She should be thinking, “How on Earth is this guy single? I can’t believe my luck! I am going to try my hardest to get him to love me, before another woman discovers him and takes him from me!”
Most guys don’t even know how to trigger a woman’s feelings of intense attraction, so women become extremely excited and keen when they find a guy who does. Watch this video to understand why…
When a woman meets a guy who triggers her feelings of attraction in the ways that she’s been hoping to experience, she latches onto him and doesn’t let go.
She knows that a guy like him is hard to find and she will most-likely have to work hard to get his attention and then maintain his interest and attraction. She will be intrigued that he is a challenge to conquer even though she is so beautiful and has loads of other guys desperately trying to be her man.
If he is what women refer to as a mysterious guy, she will have to work hard to impress him over time to really get him to share his full love, respect and devotion her. She will have to earn it and keep earning it by being a great lover, girlfriend or wife to him.
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