If you want to stop your ex from wanting to date other men, here is what you should do…
1. Don’t Talk Badly About Other Men
When a woman breaks up with a guy, she may decide that the quickest way to get over the pain is by dating some new men.
She might say to herself, “I don’t want to sit around going over my relationship with my ex and feeling sorry for myself. The best thing for me to do right now is to get out and meet new guys. I need to forget about the pain and focus on finding a man who can give me what I really need in a relationship.”
Yet, when a man realizes that his ex is dating other guys (or talking about dating other guys) it’s only natural that he might feel a bit rejected, jealous, upset and even angry about it.
He might say to himself, “How can she move so quickly? Didn’t our relationship mean anything to her? Sure we’re broken up, but I want her back so we can give this relationship another chance. I have to stop her from wanting to date other men. If I don’t, she’ll fall in love with some other guy and I will lose any chance I might have with her.”
He might then react by trying to control her.
For example: “You know that I still love you and I want what’s best for you. I’m telling you that dating other men right now is all wrong for you. You can’t rush into these things. Dating is difficult. Most guys out there don’t care about a woman’s feelings. They only want to use women for sex. You’re not like that. You’re special. I don’t want you to make a mistake by quickly dating other men. Please don’t do this.”
If she happens to already be dating other men, he might begin to badmouth the other guys and say things like, “Really? Is that the best you could do after me? That guy is such a loser. Why can’t you see that? Look at his car… he’s obviously broke!” or “How can you date such a geek? You’re such an athletic, sporty woman who loves being outdoors. I bet his idea of fun is playing video games all day,” or “You can’t really be interested in a guy with a nose like that, can you? How do you even kiss him? Doesn’t his nose poke you in the eye?”
Unfortunately, saying bad things like that to your ex only makes her want to date other men more.
By talking badly about other men, it makes you seem insecure and as though you are worried about another guy being better than you in some way.
So, even if the guys that she wants to date are complete losers or if all they really want is to have sex with her, it’s not your place to try and talk her out of dating them.
If you talk badly about the other men in her life, they will suddenly seem even more attractive to her compared to you because you will appear insecure, jealous and controlling to her and they will appear confident and in control.
So, what should you do instead?
Focus on saying and doing the types of things that will re-spark your ex woman’s feelings of respect and attraction for you (e.g. make her laugh and smile when you interact with her, make her feel feminine and girly in your presence, show her that you’re more emotionally mature and confident than before).
When you do that, she will begin thinking, “I miss him. He used to treat me so well. This new guy only wants me for the sex,” instead of thinking, “My new guy is better than my ex. My ex is only saying bad things about him because he’s a sore loser. I’m going to start posting up photos of me with my new guy to really annoy my ex. He deserves it for putting me through what he did in our relationship.”
So, make sure that you focus on re-attracting her, rather than trying to make other guys seem like a bad option by badmouthing them.
Watch this video for some examples of how to re-attract her….
If you focus on re-attracting her rather than talking badly about other men, then you will be the one who seems like a better option.
If she is meeting guys who are being nice to her (just to get laid), but she can see that they are nervous around her, then you will appear more attractive if you are confident and don’t even worry about other guys potentially hitting on her.
Just don’t see them as competition for her.
See yourself as the man and act like it.
Know that you are attractive to her simply based on the fact that you are now a way better man that you were when she broke up with you.
If you haven’t made any changes to yourself, now is the time to do it.
When a guy tries to stop his ex woman from dating other men and hasn’t even become a new man himself, she’s not going to listen.
Another mistake to avoid if you want to stop her from dating new guys is…
2. Don’t Claim That She Won’t Be Able to Find True Love Again
Sometimes, a guy might panic when he realizes that his ex wants to date other men.
He might say to himself, “I can’t let her do that. I need her to see that no other guy can love her the way that I do.”
He may then say to her, “Do you honestly believe that some other guy will ever be able to love you the way that I do? It’s impossible. You mean the world to me and I want to show you that I can change. Please don’t do this to me. Please don’t throw away the love that we shared. We can make this work. I know we can. Please don’t start dating other men. I promise you that I’ll do whatever you want me to do so that we can make things work between us. Please forget about the idea of dating other men. What you and I had was special and you will never be able to find that with anyone else, I promise you. I love you more than anything and I always will.”
Of course, most women don’t fall for that because it seems false and insecure.
Something about it just doesn’t feel right.
This is why you shouldn’t try to convince your ex to give you another chance simply based on what you’re saying…
Of course, most guys don’t want to have to change anything about themselves, so they just try to convince their ex woman with words.
If what he says doesn’t convince her, he might then add on something like, “You’d be betraying our love if you start dating other men without at least giving me a chance to make it up to you. What we had was special. You can’t just move on. You’re not like that. I know you’re a decent woman. Please don’t give up on us. You used to always tell me that you loved me and wanted to be with me forever. What happened to that girl? Please don’t do this to yourself. Don’t throw away what we have.”
Yet, here’s the thing…
A woman usually doesn’t care that you love her, unless she respects you and feels attracted to you.
If you don’t make her have feelings for you first, she’s not going to care how good things used to be between you and her, compared to how bad things might turn out with other guys.
If she meets another guy and he makes her feel respect and attraction for him in ways that you’re currently unable to, she’s going to value what she has with him now, much more than what you and her once had.
I know, it sucks to read something like that, but that’s how human relationships work.
I have to tell you the truth so you can get her back for real.
The truth is, if a woman doesn’t feel the way she wants to feel in a relationship with a guy (e.g. sexual attraction, feminine and girly, like she can look up to him and respect him) she will usually break up with him and look for another guy who can give her what she really wants.
It sounds harsh, but that’s how human relationships are.
It really comes down to a value exchange.
If she feels like she is much higher value than you (i.e. you are attracted to her, but she’s not attracted to you), then she’s going to feel like you don’t deserve her.
However, if she feels attracted to you in new and exciting ways when you interact with her, the value exchange becomes balanced again and she opens herself up to being with you.
So, telling your ex that she will never be able to find a love as good as the one between you and her, isn’t a good idea.
Rather than make her think, “My ex has a point there! I should stop looking for other guys and focus instead on getting back together with him. Our love is too precious to lose,” she will think something like, “We did have a great relationship and he ruined it all by being too insecure/needy/immature/emotionally weak/jealous and controlling. He’s just reminded me more that I should date other guys so I can get over him quickly.”
This is why you shouldn’t try to convince her that the love you and her shared is the only true love she will find.
She’s just not going to care about what used to be, until you show her (not tell her) that you can now give her the attraction experience that she really wants.
3. Start Giving Her the Attraction Experience She Always Wanted
Since almost all men feel the most attraction for a woman’s physical appearance, they assume the same rules apply for a woman’s attraction to a man.
So, when trying to get an ex back, a guy might think, “Oh, I get it. I need to go to the gym, get in shape and improve my appearance to make her want me more than other men.”
He might then go out and buy himself a whole new wardrobe, change his hairstyle, or go to the gym to lose some weight or pack on some muscle.
Yet, even though a woman might appreciate a man’s efforts to improve himself physically, his appearance isn’t the main thing that makes her want to be with a guy or not.
Essentially, a woman’s attraction to a man is based more on how he makes her feel when she’s with him.
- Does he make her feel feminine and girly in his presence, or does she feel like a neutral friend, or worse, like his mother or big sister?
- Does he make her feel safe and protected, or does she feel like she has to support him emotionally because he can’t cope with problems and challenges in life?
- Is he confident and emotionally strong, or is he insecure, needy and a little bit wimpy around her?
- Can she rely on him to take the lead and guide them both into deeper feelings of love, respect and attraction, or does he expect her to teach him how to be the man that she needs him to be?
- Is he someone she can see herself being with for life, or does she feel that he’s too emotionally immature for her?
These are qualities and behaviors women feel most attracted to in a man.
Sure, some women do like the idea of being with a guy who is physically attractive, but in most cases, a man’s physical appearance is of secondary importance to how his personality makes her feel when she interacts with him.
So, if you want to stop your ex from wanting to date other men, you need to begin offering her what she really wants in a relationship, otherwise she will try to find it in other men.
For example: If a woman broke up with a guy because he was too insecure and clingy, she will usually look for a guy who is more confident and self-assured than her ex.
So, if a guy wants to stop her from looking for those qualities in other men, he needs to quickly show her (via what he says and does) that he is now more confident and emotionally strong than ever before.
If a woman broke up with a guy because he was too wimpy and he allowed her to walk all over him, to stop her from looking for a man who is more dominant, he needs to show her that he’s changed by being more ballsy around her and standing up to her when she tries to push him around.
Important: Don’t re-approach your ex and essentially say, “Hey, I’ve changed. Now do you want me back?” or, “Hey, I’m confident now. You said that you wanted a confident guy. Here I am.”
Approaching your ex in those ways will make her raise her guard up and feel suspicious of your intentions.
Instead, just interact with her and let her experience the changes, without trying to seek her approval.
For example: Don’t say something like, “See? I’m being confident now” or, “Did you notice that I didn’t get angry this time?”
She doesn’t want to be put in a position where she essentially has to say, “Good boy. Yes, you did good” and give you a pat on the head.
She just wants you to change and start being the man you are destined to be.
She also doesn’t want you trying to compete with other guys and hopefully make her see that you’re better than them.
If she senses that you’re only making changes because you see other guys as being better than you, it makes you appear insecure and self-doubting.
She wants you to change and just believe in the new, improved version of you, without worrying that she might feel attracted to random guys.
After all, you feel attracted to random women all the time, right?
Probably not as much since the break up because you’re trying to get her back, but in general, you do feel fleeting attraction for women you notice, right?
Well, if she feels that kind of attraction and then forgets about the guy, there’s nothing for you to worry about.
Just be the new and improved version of yourself, re-attract her and get her back.
When you begin saying and doing things that make her feel attracted (e.g. you get her laughing and smiling, you’re confident, charming, charismatic, emotionally masculine), she no longer feels a strong need to want to date other men.
Instead, she begins to drops her guard and wonder whether she made a mistake about breaking up with you.
From there, you need to guide her into deeper feelings of love, respect and attraction for you and show her that things between you and her really are different now.
Finally, you should…
5. Meet Up With Her and Hook Up With Her Sexually, So She Can Fully Experience the New and Improved You
The best way to stop your ex from wanting to date other men is to meet up with her, let her experience the new and improved you first hand and then hook up with her sexually.
Here’s the thing…
No matter how much it sounds like a woman is enjoying talking to you on the phone, it’s not the same as her seeing you face-to-face and being able to experience the power of your confident personality, based on your body language and the way you talk and interact with her.
It’s also not the same as being kissed by the new and improved you, who is so much more confident, sure of himself, charismatic and interesting than before.
The main thing to remember is that the fastest way to make your ex see you as better than other guys is to actively re-spark her feelings of respect and attraction for you in person.
So, don’t sit around worrying about her wanting to date other men and focus instead on making her feel good to be around you again.
One of the best ways to do that is to make her laugh and smile when you interact with her.
For example: Imagine that you and your ex are meeting up in a coffee shop and she’s says something like, “It’s over between us. I’m ready to move on and date other men.”
Rather than get upset about it, you can turn it into something you can both laugh about and make her feel attracted to your confidence in the process.
You can respond by saying something along the lines of, “Sure, I totally agree. I think you should do that because you’ll then realize that you will never be able to get over me.”
She will likely get a bit annoyed and say something like, “What makes you think I can’t get over you?” and you can then say in a joking way, “It’s obvious really… I give great foot massages and I don’t think there’s another guy on the planet who can face touching your feet for 10 minutes like I did. I had to hold my breath the whole time. It was torture!”
She will likely laugh at how you’re teasing her and she will probably begin to wonder, “Why is he being so funny and relaxed? What’s changed about him? I’m actually enjoying his company.”
You can then add in, “…and how about all that burnt toast? Remember when you made scrambled eggs for me? I don’t know if any other guy would put up with that. I secretly went into the toilet afterwards and threw up. It was horrible” and then have a laugh with her about that.
All of a sudden, she stops looking at you as her unattractive ex and starts wondering why she doesn’t just give you one more chance.
Once she is thinking that way, getting her back and keeping her in a relationship will be very easy for you.
She loosens up and becomes more open to touching you (e.g. on the arm or leg), kissing you and even hooking up with you sexually.
Remember: The more you make her feel attracted to the new and improved you, the more open she becomes to getting back together again.
She then stops feeling the desire to date other men and just wants to hug, kiss and have sex with the new and improved you.