Have you ever heard a woman say, “I want a guy who understands me” when she is describing her perfect kind of guy?
Women say that sort of thing all the time, but what does it really mean to understand a woman?
Here are 5 examples of how to understand a woman in the way that she really wants to be understood by a man.
1. Understand that she isn’t always as strong as she makes herself out to be.
Women will often put on a brave front as behave as though they are confident and too good for most guys that they meet. Yet, beneath the surface, many women are either insecure, depressed or suffering from some sort of anxiety.
- Women are reported to experience depression at twice the rate of men in the USA. In the UK, 40% of women will require treatment for depression at some point in their life compared to only 10% of men. In other words, women are more depressed than men.
- Women are twice as likely to experience anxiety compared to men.
- 60% of the people who have OCD (Obsessive Compulsive Disorders) and phobias are women.
- Most women are insecure about their physical appearance. According to a global study conducted by Dove cosmetics, 96% of women don’t consider themselves to be beautiful.
As you can see from the statistics above, many women that you meet will put on a brave face, but are actually quite insecure.
A lot of guys make the mistake of interacting with women and placing those women above themselves in terms of social value, confidence and dominance.
Yet, when a woman encounters a guy who places himself below her in terms of dominance because he assumes that she is so much more confident and emotionally strong than he is, she loses respect for him because he doesn’t understand who she really is deep down.
She knows that she’s just a girl in the world, trying to get by and doing her best to remain strong, even though she often cries, feels afraid and becomes insecure.
For example: According to an American study, most women cry about 5.3 times a month, or about once a week.
So, while a woman might look tough because of the way she is acting around a guy, it doesn’t mean that she is as emotionally strong as a typical guy is.
When a woman meets a guy who assumes that she is stronger than he is, she knows that he’s not the sort of guy who will easily understand her.
A typical woman is not looking to match herself up with a guy who is emotionally weaker than she is. The majority of women want to find a guy who is emotionally stronger than they are, not weaker.
She wants to be able to feel safe and protected with him because no matter how challenging life gets, he will remain emotionally strong for both of them.
2. Understand that she often just wants to feel emotions, rather than try to fix every problem.
One of the mistakes that guys make when talking to a woman is to try and fix all of her problems during a conversation. The guy wants to show her how helpful he is and make her life better by fixing problems and annoyances in her life.
Yet, that’s not what a woman always wants from a guy.
For example: A woman might talk about how there is a girl at work who is annoying because she is getting more praise from the boss.
In most cases, the woman is going to be smart enough to come up with a solution on her own, so she’s not necessarily looking to the guy to come up with a solution that will fix the problem for her.
She might just want to express her feelings and talk about it in an emotional way, rather than having a serious, logical discussion on how to fix the problem.
So, the mistake that some guys make in these moments is to say, “Oh, I know what you need to do to fix the problem” and then explain exactly how to fix it. He’s hoping that she will be impressed by helpful and smart he is.
Yet, that’s not what she’s looking to experience around a guy. Why?
If she always has to have serious, logical discussion like a guy when she talks to him, then she can’t relax into being a feminine, emotional woman.
She has to disconnect from her preferred state of emotions and get into a more masculine, logical state of mind to fix the problem and keep moving forward in life.
Here’s what a lot of guys don’t realize about women…
Many women simply like to TALK about problems, get emotional about it and then change the subject.
Not trying to fix the problem doesn’t mean that the woman is stupid or incapable of fixing problems in her life, but it does mean that she is simply thinking, feeling and behaving like a feminine woman.
She can get masculine and logical if she needs to, but when she’s talking to a guy, she wants to be able to relax into being a woman, rather than having to copy how he thinks, behaves and feels.
Of course, sometimes a woman is looking for help from a guy and is hoping that he can offer a solution, but in those cases, she will ask for his help and focus on trying to come up with a solution.
However, the majority of times, she just wants to be able to express her feelings and talk about things in an emotional way, without having to get into a more masculine, logical way of thinking.
Note: This does not apply to a work context, where you are having a serious conversation with a co-worker or female boss. In that environment, you need to have serious, logical discussions to be able to find solutions and fix problems.
However, when having a conversation with a woman who you want to attract into a sexual relationship, you need to back off on trying to be a Mr. Fix It every time she brings up a problem or complains about something that is going on in her life.
Just let her experiences the emotions and she will extremely happy, impressed and excited that you understand a woman sometimes just wants to vent and get into an emotional state of being.
3. Understand that she wants to be able to feel like a feminine woman around you.
Some women are very masculine in their nature and prefer to think, feel and behave like men.
However, the majority of women are very feminine in their nature and regardless of how tough a woman’s exterior may seem to you when you meet her, deep down she wants to be able to feel feminine and girly around the man that she gets sexually and romantically involved in.
She might be embarrassed or reluctant to openly admit that to others (e.g. if she works in a high status job and needs to make sure people respect her), but away from prying eyes, she wants to be able to be her man’s girl.
To make a woman feel like a feminine woman around you, it’s important that you don’t suppress your masculinity by putting on an act of being a really nice, sweet, extra polite guy or a neutral guy who has no sexual feelings for her.
Women want men to be more honest and ballsy, rather than putting on an act of being a non-sexual gentleman who just wants to get to know her slowly.
It’s not 1905 anymore.
In today’s world, sex happens all the time and usually very quickly. For example: A study in the USA found that 55% of couples had sex on their first date and a European study found that 70% of women admitted to having experienced a one night stand.
So, while it might seem like the “right thing to do” to be neutral and extra nice around modern women, it’s usually a recipe for disaster.
Watch this video to understand why putting on an act of being an even nicer guy than you really are, will often lead to rejection with modern women…
As you will discover from the video above, there is nothing wrong with being nice to women.
However, when a guy is way too nice to the point where he supresses his masculinity and tries to come across as an extra polite, sweet, non-sexual guy, most modern women simply roll their eyes and reject him for using such an out-dated approach to dating.
What women are really looking for is a guy who isn’t afraid to be real around her, but is also a good guy. He doesn’t put on an act of being nicer than he actually is, but he is still a good guy.
Rather than lie and pretend like he just wants to be his friends, he has the balls to say, “You’re sexy, I like you” shortly after they begin talking to each other.
He’s not afraid to be real like that and women like it. They like it when a guy has the balls to be honest and show his sexual interest in a relaxed, confident manner.
4. Understand that she wants you to make her feel safe and protected, but to not go overboard.
Deep down, a woman does want to feel safe and protected by her man, but she doesn’t want him to go overboard and treat her like a naïve child.
Most women are perfectly capable enough of getting by in life without the protection of a man. She has supermarkets at her disposal, she has a smartphone, there are police in place to protect her and she can earn her own money to support herself.
Life today is not like it used to be 100 or 200 years ago. Today’s women have equal rights, they have power and they can get by in life without the direct protection of one man.
However, despite all that, a woman still wants to feel like her man has got her back and that he will remain emotionally strong no matter how challenging life gets for either of them.
He will continue to lead the way to a better life for both of them, even if she stumbles and falls along the way because she’s not as emotionally strong or resilient as he is.
Making a woman feel safe and protected isn’t about starring other guys down or beating up guys who look at her. It’s simply about making sure that she can rely on you to be a confident, emotionally strong man no matter what happens.
5. Understand that she won’t always think, feel and act the same way as other women do.
Some women like to be made to feel a lot more girly and feminine than others.
Some women are very career focused whereas others only study and work to kill time until they find a man who will impregnate them, marry them and let them be a stay at home mother.
Some women are afraid to fall in love, whereas others are fearless with love. Some women are insecure when they are in a relationship, whereas others are completely confident and secure in their attractiveness and value to a guy.
So, one of the keys of how to understand a woman is to understand that not all women are the same.
You can’t expect every woman to think, behave, feel and act in the same way. You’ve got to allow a woman to be her individual self and love and appreciate her for who she is, rather than expecting her to think, feel, behave and act like other women.
Understanding How a Woman’s Attraction For a Man Really Works
One of the things that really annoys women is how the majority of guys don’t understand how a woman’s attraction for a man really works.
Most guys assume that women feel attracted to men for the exact same reasons that men feel attracted to women (i.e. physical appearance).
However, as you will discover from the video below, the majority of women feel attracted to men for reasons other than mere looks…