5 reasons why that can happen and how to get her back:

1. You’re both emotionally mature people and were able to handle the break up process well

A lot of break ups can be very unpleasant.

For example: The woman might dump the guy and say things like, “I’ve had it with you! It’s over. Don’t try to change my mind because it won’t work. I’m done. I wish I’d never met you.”

The guy will then likely feel hurt and he may react in different ways, such as becoming defensive and angry and possibly even aggressive towards her.

Alternatively, he might run after her in a desperate, needy way and beg and plead with her to give him another chance.

Yet, this is not the ideal way to handle a break up.

On the other hand, a couple that is emotionally mature will react in a very different way.

Firstly, the woman will be mature enough to admit that it takes two people to make or break a relationship.

It’s almost never always one person’s fault.

As a result, when she breaks up with her guy, she will do it in a mature way where she acknowledges that they both make mistakes and it just didn’t work out.

At the same time, an emotionally mature guy will avoid causing a scene when the break up happens.

Instead, he remains calm and emotionally strong and maybe says something along the lines of, “Although I do still care for you and would prefer that we try to work things out rather than break up, I want you to know that I accept your decision. I promise I won’t pressure you into doing anything you don’t want. We can just be friends from now on, okay?”

By saying that to her, he immediately sparks some of her feelings of respect for him again, because he’s also being emotionally mature about the break up.

Then, if he decides to re-attract her and get her back he can do it easily, because he’s made sure that he’s left a good impression of himself in her mind.

In the same way, seeing as you and your ex ended on good terms, if you want her back, it’s so much easier for you to make it happen.

Here’s how…

Give her a week of space where you don’t contact her at all (i.e. no texting, messaging her on social media or calling her on the phone).

This gives her time to start missing you.

Of course, that doesn’t mean you should waste that time sitting around moping, missing her and possibly even thinking negative thoughts like, “I hate this. I miss her so much! I just can’t function without her in my life. What if I contact her after this week and she says she hasn’t missed me at all and doesn’t want me back, what will I do then?”


You need to use the time wisely, to quickly prepare yourself to give her an upgraded attraction experience when you do contact her after the week is up (e.g. by getting control of your emotions, getting to the point where you want her back but don’t need her back, coming up with a clear list of reasons why she broke up with you and start improving those things about yourself).

Then after giving her a week of space, call her on the phone to say hello and start re-sparking some of her sexual and romantic feelings for you so she wants to see you in person again.

One of the best ways to do that is by using humor to make her laugh and smile and feel good to be hearing from you again.

Then, when she’s relaxed and open, you can go ahead and get her to agree to catch up in person to say hello as friends.

At the meet up, continue saying and doing the types of things that will naturally spark her feelings of respect and attraction for you (e.g. being confident regardless of how she behaves or what she says, flirting with her to create sexual tension between you, being ballsy rather than timid or submissive).

Important: Don’t make the mistake of behaving like a neutral friend with her and pretending that you don’t want her back.

Be friendly with her, but also make her feel attracted.

That’s the only way to relight the spark in her heart and make her want you back in a sexual and romantic way.

She then naturally drops her guard and opens up to the idea of being your girl again.

You can then progress to giving her a hug, a kiss and then hook up with her sexually and get her back.

Another possible reason why you and your ex ended on good terms is…

2. She’s good at ending things on good terms with a guy to avoid him becoming angry or aggressive

She’s good at ending things on good terms with a guy to avoid him becoming angry or aggressive

Sometimes, a woman will do whatever it takes to end things well with a guy.

Even if he’s a really good guy who would never do anything to hurt her, her natural instinct is to protect herself from potentially getting hurt physically, or having to deal with a man who threatens her, becomes aggressive or wants to get revenge on her for dumping him.

So, rather than breaking up with him by saying something along the lines of, “It’s over between us and it’s all your fault. You’re a real jerk and because of that, my feelings for you are dead. I never want to see you again. Just go away and leave me alone,” and risk him reacting badly, she instead tries to let him down easy and with a feeling that they ended on good terms.

As a result, she might say something like, “Look, it’s not you. You’re a great guy and you know I will always love you. I just think I need some space right now. I have so many issues I need to face in my life and I don’t want to drag you down with my drama. For now, let’s just be friends and who knows, maybe some time in the future we can get back together again.”

He’s then likely left feeling good and possibly even hopeful after the break up, rather that feeling hurt, betrayed and maybe even angry and resentful towards her.

She can then move on without worrying that her ex will try to get revenge on her in some way, or chase after her relentlessly to try and get her back.

Here’s the thing though…

Just because you and your ex ended things amicably, doesn’t mean you now have to be a good little boy and sit in the wings while she moves on with some other guy.

Instead, use the fact that you and her are still on friendly terms to reactivate her feelings for you and get her back.

That means, from now on, every interaction you have with her, especially over the phone and in person, you focus on making her feel surges of respect and sexual attraction for you again.

The more she realizes that you really are different now and she really does feel differently about you as well, the more curious and intrigued she becomes about her new feelings for you.

This makes her want to explore them, rather than walking away from you and then potentially regretting it later on.

She then becomes open to talking to you, hanging out with you more, to see where things go from there.

Another possible reason why you and your ex ended on good terms is…

3. Your relationship was more like a friendship than a passionate, boyfriend-girlfriend relationship, so the break up wasn’t too hard on either of you

Most relationships start off with loads of attraction and desire.

There’s usually lots of sex and the couple can barely keep their hands off each other.

Naturally, after a while, the initial thrill wears off and they will likely settle into a calmer relationship.

Of course, that doesn’t mean they don’t still feel attracted to each other or have awesome sex.

However, in some cases it does.

In fact, losing the sexual spark and feeling more like friends, is one of the biggest reasons why a couple will break up.

Here’s the thing though…

The less feminine and girly a woman feels around her man, the less sexual attraction she feels for him.

She might love him and really enjoy his company, but without that all important spark of sexual desire, the relationship becomes more like a friendship to her.

The same also applies to a guy.

If he begins treating his woman like ‘one of the guys’ and would rather watch a sports game with her than have sex with her, it clearly indicates that the relationship has transitioned from boyfriend/girlfriend to just being buddies.

At that point, a break up becomes almost inevitable.

Sure, there are some couples who will stick in a sexless relationship out of comfort (e.g. they share the bills, chores and other responsibilities, they have fun together), or because they’re too scared to go out and start over again.

However, the majority or couples will eventually get bored living without that spark and will usually just end things on good terms and move on.

After the break up, they might miss the easygoing companionship they used to share, but that won’t be enough to make them want to get back together again.

The question you need to ask yourself is this:

Did you and your ex become more like friends than boyfriend/girlfriend and if so, do you want to change that and get her back, or would you rather just move on and find another woman who makes you feel that all essential spark of sexual attraction when you’re with her?

If you decide that you want to relight the fire of attraction between you and your ex, here are some of the ways you can go about doing that:

  • Using humor to make her laugh, smile and feel relaxed during interactions with you and get her to open up to seeing you more often.
  • Making her feel feminine and girly in contrast to your masculine vibe.
    Being assertive and bold, rather than submissive and timid when talking to her.
  • Flirting with her to relight the sexual spark inside of her that has been missing for a long time.
  • Letting her see via your attitude and the way you talk to her and respond to her that you believe in your attractiveness and value to her.
  • Maintaining your confidence with her regardless of what she says or does to make you feel insecure and unsure of yourself (e.g. being cold and aloof towards you, saying things like, “I really do care for you as a friend, but I just don’t want to be your girl again. Please accept that and let me go.”)
  • Showing her that you’ve leveled up since the break up and are now the man she always wanted you to be.

The more you reactivate her feelings for you during interactions, the more she won’t be able to stop herself from feeling drawn to you again in a way that feels good to her.

Suddenly that lost spark is back and the idea of losing you for real becomes something she doesn’t want to see happen.

You can then gently guide her back into a relationship with you that’s so much better than before.

You’ve now survived a break up and have come back stronger, more in love and more sexually attracted to each other than even the first time around.

Another possible reason why you and your ex ended on good terms is…

4. She liked someone else and wanted to end things nicely with you, before starting a relationship with him

Sometimes, a woman might find herself feeling attracted to another man (e.g. because her relationship with her guy has become boring, he doesn’t know how to give her the attraction experience she really wants).

As a result she may decide to break up with him as gently as possible by saying something along the lines of, “You’re a really great guy, but I just don’t feel like my heart is in the relationship anymore. I think I need to take some time to figure out what I really want and I don’t want to string you along while I do that. It just wouldn’t be fair to you. I hope you can accept that and forgive me.”

He’s then forced to be a gentleman about the whole thing and respond with something like, “Of course. I understand. Take all the time you need. In the meantime, we can be friends, okay?”

They then end the relationship on good terms.

She can then move on with a clear conscience, rather than feeling like a cheater.

So, how can you get a woman back in a situation like that?

You need to make her feel so much respect and attraction for you as a man that the idea of being with any man other than you, feels wrong and unnatural to her.

Get her to the point where she wants you back for her own selfish reasons (e.g. she feels that what she has with her new guy is average compared to the way she now feels with you, she fears that she made a mistake and if she loses you she will never truly be happy).

When you approach the ex back process in that way, getting her back becomes easy because it’s what she wants to do.

Another possible reason why you and your ex ended on good terms is…

5. You both respect each other, but the sexual attraction isn’t mutual

In some cases, a woman will get into a relationship with a guy she doesn’t feel 100% attracted to.

She likes him and respects him as a person and she knows that he will be good to her, but she just doesn’t feel fully attracted to him.

However, because he’s a good man, she may decide to give him a chance anyway, while secretly hoping that as she gets to know him better over time, she will start to feel more attracted to him.

Unfortunately though, that never happens and the difference in how they feel about each other grows bigger and bigger.

From his point of view, everything is perfect.

He feels attracted to her, he loves her and he wants to be with her.

Yet, she doesn’t feel the same way.

It’s one sided.

As a result, she may decide to break up with him and focus on finding herself a guy who can make her feel the way she wants to feel (e.g. excited, sexually attracted, enthralled).

However, because she does like her ex and feels he’s a great guy overall, she will usually do her best to let him down gently, so that he feels good about himself afterwards.

Basically, she wants to make sure that he doesn’t blame himself for the break up, but instead feels that they ended on good terms.

He then walks away thinking something along the lines of, “Well, that ended well. I guess we can still be friends. That’s a good thing, right? Besides, who knows… maybe after a while she will change her mind and we can get back together again.”

Unfortunately though, that’s not how it works.

If a guy doesn’t do anything to actively spark his ex’s sexual and romantic feelings for him to the point where she feels as much for him as he does for her, she’s likely just going to move on and find herself a new man.

This is why you need to approach the ex back process with your ex in a way that will open her up and make her want to talk to you and be around you more, rather than less.

In other words, you need to make the feelings between you and her mutual, or at least close to mutual.

How can you do that?

By using every interaction you have with her via social media, text, over the phone and especially in person to build on her feelings for you.

If you’re unsure of how to do that, here are some questions you ask yourself that will guide you in the right direction:

  • Am I being confident, charismatic and emotionally strong, or am I being nervous, unsure of myself and insecure?
  • Am I taking the lead in this interaction, or am I being submissive and wimpy and allowing her to dominate me with her confident personality?
  • Am I making her feel like a sexy, feminine woman in my presence, or am I treating her more like a neutral friend?
  • Am I being a bit of a challenge to her so she feels like she has to work hard to keep my attention on her, or am I being boring and predictable?
  • Do I truly believe in myself and in my value to her, or am I secretly doubting myself and feeling as though she’s too good for me?
  • Am I making her laugh and smile and feel happy and relaxed to be around me again, or am I making her feel tense, annoyed or stressed out.
  • Am I flirting with her and creating sexual tension between us, or am I being a good little boy who is pretending not to be attracted to her anymore?
  • Am I ballsy enough to stand up to her in a dominant, but loving way when she creates unnecessary drama, or am I timid and always seem to let her have her way just to be nice?

As long as you use these questions as guidelines during your interactions with your ex, you will almost certainly be attracting her.

She will then naturally and easily start to feel a renewed sense of respect and attraction for you.

When that happens, her guard comes down and she starts to feel differently about the relationship and the possibility of getting back together.

However, if you don’t actively make her feel an equal (or almost equal ) amount of attraction for you as you have for her, then don’t even worry about trying to get her back because she’s just going to keep saying things like, “You really are a great guy, but I just need my space for now.”

2 Mistakes to Be Aware of if You Truly Want Her Back

The good news is that by ending on good terms with your ex, you now have the opportunity to interact with her any time you want.

You can then easily reactivate her sexual and romantic feelings for you and get her back.

The bad news is, if you don’t use the right approach, you can easily go from being on good terms with her to her refusing to talk to you.

This is why, it’s important that you don’t make these mistakes:

1. Mistakenly assuming that continuing to be a nice, good ex boyfriend will make her want you back

A guy might sometimes think to himself, “Well at least things ended well between us. If I just stick around and continue to be a good guy to her, she will eventually see that I’m the only guy she can truly rely on to be there for her no matter what. She will then realize that she really does love me and that the break up was just a mistake and we can then get back together again.”

He then sticks around being his ex’s nice, sweet, reliable friend who is available to her whenever she needs him, day or night.

Yet, in most cases, a woman will assume that friends means friends and he’ll end up being the one she confides in about the new man in her life.

He’s then left feeling devastated and wondering why she can’t see that he’s the perfect man for her.

Here’s the thing…

It’s great to be good to your ex, but if she meets another good guy who actively makes her feel sexually attracted and turned on, her attention is going to go to him.

So, don’t put yourself in that position with her.

Be a good friend to her by all means, but make sure your friendship with her is only a stepping stone towards making her feel sexually attracted to you, so she can then begin to fall in love with you again.

The next mistake is…

2. Not realizing that she may have played you and then getting played by another woman that you love in future

Sometimes, a woman just wants to get out of a relationship with a guy, but because he didn’t do anything really bad to justify being dumped, she has no choice but to end it on good terms.

She essentially has to sweet talk her way out of the relationship, rather than getting angry and dumping him.

This happens to a lot of nice guys.

Women make them believe that the relationship is happy and that there’s nothing wrong with him.

It’s all her fault.

She’s confused and needs to find herself.

Yet, in reality, he’s just too nice, agreeable and predictable for her.

She can’t fault him as a person because he’s a great person, but due to his nice guy approach, there’s no lasting spark.

The guy then gets broken up, but is left with a sweet taste in his mouth (i.e. they ended on good terms so he doesn’t feel so bad).

Then somewhere down the line he gets into a new relationship, only for it to end in the same way.

Eventually he becomes the guy with a string of exes that he’s on good terms with.

Unfortunately though, he never quite seems to hold on to any of them.

Don’t let that happen to you.

Remember: Women are instinctively wired to feel attracted to and stick with a man that they can look up to and respect.

So, if you want your ex back, or at least for your next relationship to last, you need to make sure that you are being a man that your woman can look up to and respect.

Don’t make the mistake of handing all your power over to her and being super nice because you think that’s what will make her love you and want to stay with you.

Instead, just be a good, loving man and treat her well, but also be enough of a challenge to her so she feels motivated to be a loving, caring, devoted woman to you too.

Simply be the more emotionally dominant one and lead both you and her into deeper feelings of love, respect and attraction.

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