If your girlfriend is telling you that you take her for granted, you simply have to change a few things to fix the problem and get the relationship back on track.
Here’s what you need to do…
1. Apologize for taking her for granted
For example, you can say, “You’re absolutely right. I’m sorry. You’re so important to me, but I’ve been behaving like I don’t really care what you think or feel. That was wrong.”
Try not to turn the apology and the current situation between you and her into something hugely serious.
Hear what she saying, sincerely apologize and then get back on with loving her, laughing, smiling and enjoying yourselves together.
Try to avoid getting angry and turning it into a huge argument that drives you and her further apart.
Take the feedback, but don’t see it as an attack. Look at it as an opportunity to deepen her feelings of love, respect and attraction for you by instantly beginning to change and make her feel happier with you.
2. Remind her that everyone makes mistakes
Tell her that you’re glad she has told you that you’ve been taking her for granted, because it has woken you up.
Then, let her know that although you did stuff up, no one is perfect and everyone makes mistakes sometimes.
3. Get her to feel a renewed sense of respect and attraction for you as a man
If your girlfriend doesn’t respect you enough or feel enough attraction for you, she will gradually begin to fall out of love with you.
When she falls out of love with you, she will then either break up with you or ask for some time apart so she can figure out what she wants.
So, before she gets to that point, make sure that you’re thinking, behaving, feeling and acting in the ways that naturally make a woman feel attracted to you.
You can literally change the way your girlfriend is currently feeling by changing how you approach your interactions with her.
Getting a Bit Too Comfortable
When a guy lacks relationship experience (or hasn’t learnt from his past relationship mistakes), he will usually reach a point where he gets a bit too comfortable with the idea that his girlfriend belongs to him.
What a lot of guys don’t realize is that a woman no longer has to stay with a man if she doesn’t want to.
In the past, a woman had to save her virginity for marriage, get married and then stick with a man for life, even if she was unhappy.
In today’s world, women are free to do whatever they want. If a woman’s boyfriend (fiancé or husband) takes her for granted and stops caring about making her feel the type of love, respect and attraction she wants, she will usually give him a few warnings first and if he doesn’t change, she will break up with him.
A lot of modern men are shocked when their girlfriend breaks up with them because they are operating under the idea that once a couple says, “I love you” and gets into a serious relationship, they are pretty much set for life.
For example: A guy will spend too much time playing video games, watching sports, working or hanging out with friends and he will just expect his girlfriend to keep putting up with it no matter what.
A modern woman will put up with that type of treatment for a while, but not forever.
If she’s attractive and can easily get herself another guy, it’s not difficult for her to open up a dating app or register for online dating and 100s of guys interested in her over night.
It’s not like it was back in 1900 for example, where a woman was almost completely dependent on a man.
A modern woman can earn her own money, rent her own house, buy food on her own and use a smartphone to instantly connect with 100s of horny guys.
So, if she finds herself in a relationship with a guy who is taking her for granted, she knows that she can leave and move on if she wants to.
When she gets to the point where she’s had enough, she will then tell her boyfriend something like, “You take me for granted” or “You treat me like shit and expect me to stick around.”
Later on, when the guy tells his buddies about what she said, he might say something like, “I never saw it coming,” or “It was so out of the blue,” or “She never told me what was bothering her and then all of a sudden, she said that it was over between us.”
Here’s the thing…
A woman doesn’t usually come out and tell her guy exactly what is bothering her and exactly what he needs to do to make her happy.
Instead, she will usually give him hints during arguments (e.g. “You treat me like crap” or “I’m sick of the way you treat me”), but in most cases, a guy will overlook what she is trying to tell him and will then feel completely shocked when she breaks up with him.
It’s not all his fault though, because women don’t provide instructions on how to fix relationship problems. They usually just argue, complain and nag in the hope that a guy will change.
Why? A woman doesn’t want to be a guy’s teacher on how to be a man. Instinctively, she knows that if she has to take on the role of his teacher, it will destroy her feelings of respect and attraction for him.
A male-female relationship that has little respect or attraction cannot continue for very long. A woman might stick around because she can’t afford to leave and pay rent (or a mortgage) on her own, but she will be gone as soon as it is possible for her to leave.
So, if you’re currently saying something like, “My girlfriend says I take her for granted,” then you are in the very lucky (yes, lucky) position of having a girlfriend who is actually taking the time to tell you what is making her unhappy in her relationship with you, before she actually breaks up with you.
You can choose to ignore her and wake up one morning to the sound of the door closing behind her as she leaves your life forever, or you can use this as an opportunity to make your relationship with her better than it has ever been.
If you don’t want to lose her, you’ve got to understand where you’ve been going wrong and what you need to change to make her feel respectful of you and attracted to you again.
If you don’t make changes now, she will probably break up with you pretty soon.
In many cases where a woman feels taken for granted, she will usually cheat or have another guy lined up before she breaks up with her guy.
She does that to ensure that he can’t seduce her back into a relationship easily.
She wants to make him feel the kind of pain she has felt while being taken for granted for so long.
So, if you want to avoid all that mess, just start changing now.
It’s so much easier than going through a messy break up and then having to get her back (if you want to, that is).
Have You Been Making Any of These Mistakes in Your Relationship With Her?
When a guy’s girlfriend says that he takes her for granted, he will usually first respond by denying it.
He’s thinking, “But I love her more than anything. How can she even say that to me? Don’t I do nice things for her to show her how much she means to me? What is her problem?”
Yet, if a woman is saying that her man is taking her for granted, there is going to be a real reason for it.
Sure, she might be crazy and demanding way too much of her boyfriend, but in most cases it is legit and you need to pay attention, apologize, change, re-attract her and then get the relationship back on track.
Here’s the thing…
You are probably a really good guy with a good, kind, honest heart.
Maybe you always remember her birthday, Valentine’s Day and any other special holiday and dates (like the day you met, or the first time you kissed, etc.).
However, no matter how great she feels when you buy her gifts and spoil her on those days, it will mean nothing to her if the rest of the time you are behaving in a way that makes her feel unloved and unvalued.
Have you been behaving in any of the following ways?
1. Failing to notice her efforts to look good for you
Women know that to attract a man and keep him interested in them, they have to look good physically.
It’s not enough for a woman to just be a nice person, because we men want to have a physically attractive woman. Just think about the women you masturbate to in porn – it’s pretty much all about the physical attraction you feel for how they look.
Men are naturally attracted to how a woman looks, so a guy will often overlook a woman’s personality flaws (e.g. her not being very intelligent, not being very nice, etc) just to get her to have sex with him and begin a relationship.
When in a relationship, a woman knows that she “caught” her man by looking good initially and if she feels lucky to be with him, she will continue to make every effort to KEEP looking good for him so that he will stay with her.
However, if her guy stops noticing the efforts she is making to remain physically attractive for him, she will begin to feel unhappy and feel like he is taking her for granted.
This applies even if your girlfriend has put on some weight in the relationship, but still makes an effort to look as pretty and appealing as she can in other ways (e.g. applying make up, wearing new clothes, etc).
So, ask yourself…
Have you being failing to notice when your girlfriend is wearing a new outfit to impress you? Do you assume that she’s just doing it for nothing, rather than hoping to get a, “Wow baby…you look hot” reaction from you?
Have you ever brushed her off when she asked you for an opinion on what to wear by saying, “I don’t care. Whatever you decide is fine with me babe.”
This may seem fine to you because you may not care too much about fashion or looking good, but it means a lot to her because she knows that a woman’s physical appearance is the most attractive thing to a man.
You might think that your girlfriend looks great no matter what she wears, but not taking the time to pay attention to things that matter to her will cause her to question whether you actually care about her at all.
It may sound so trivial to you (don’t worry, I get that. I’m a man too), but it’s important to her.
If you ignore her efforts often enough, she will feel like you are taking whatever she does to please you for granted. She will then begin to feel unhappy and may start being annoying, distant or begin to nag you about random things just to make you feel bad too.
2. Putting her in second place in your life
As you go through life, plans can and do change.
Your girlfriend would be unreasonable if she got mad and said that you were taking her for granted, if you only had to change your plans with her once or twice at the last minute.
However, if it’s an ongoing habit of yours, where you make plans to do something that she really wants to do with you, only to call her up at the last minute to cancel because you have to work late, or you got caught up with some friends, or your mom wanted you to go over for dinner, etc she will naturally begin to feel second best in your life.
She will feel as though you make time available for her when it’s convenient for you, which makes her feel like she is just waiting around for you.
So, what place should she have in your life?
Should be your number one priority with everything?
The right way to approach a relationship with a woman you love is to make her the most important person in your life, but not the most important thing.
The most important thing in your life needs to be your purpose in life.
In other words, your mission in life, your big dreams and ambitions that you are aiming to achieve throughout your life.
Never make a woman the most important thing in your life.
However, do allow her to become the most important person if you love her and are truly committed to her.
If she’s just another girl that you’re dating, then don’t give her that level of commitment and importance.
Yet, if you see her as the one for you and the girl you love and want to commit to, then make her the most important person in your life.
To do that, you just have to care about her, love her and want the best for you and her.
It’s not about lavishing her with gifts, doing loads of nice things for her or anything like that.
Instead, it’s about genuinely treating her like the most important person in your life, while you also continually focus on the most important thing in your life (i.e. your purpose, dreams and ambitions).
If you are spending time with her, away from focusing on your purpose, then give her your time and attention.
If you are focussing on your purpose, then she needs to respect your focus and not be wanting to always take your attention and time away from that.
In fact, if you let her take your time and attention away too much or too often, she will lose respect and attraction for you due to letting yourself be distracted by her.
So, give her time, attention and love, but don’t go overboard and make her feel like everything you do is about her.
Instead, know what is the most important thing to you, focus on that, make progress on it AND give her time, love and attention too.
If you do that, she will respect you, feel attracted to you and stick with you because it’s so rare to find a man like that.
Women refer to men like that as real men and they are very hard to find.
When a woman finds one, she knows that it would be a huge mistake for her to ever leave him because other guys just wouldn’t compare.
3. Not pulling your weight in the home or the relationship
In a relationship, you need to be the man and be the more dominant one, otherwise your woman will lose respect and attraction for you over time.
Being the more dominant one doesn’t mean that your girlfriend is less important, less intelligent, doesn’t have a say in the decision-making, or has to get stuck with doing everything around the home.
If she is always the one doing the cooking, cleaning and other housework, or, if she’s always the one changing her plans to suit you, or running errands for you while you never do the same for her, she will naturally feel like you’re using her.
Her opinions, needs and wants are just as important as your own because she is a living, breathing human being who deserves respect and love just as much as you do.
If a woman feels as though her guy doesn’t see her as being equally important or deserving of love, then she will naturally grow to resent him and may eventually seek to get emotional revenge by dumping him (usually when he is at a weak point in life emotionally) or cheating on him to make herself feel better.
So, if you want a relationship to be happy, balanced and last for life, you need to let a woman sense that you are the more dominant one, but you still love her, respect her and appreciate her.
When you approach it that way, she will stick to you like glue for life.
She Loves You Enough to Want You to Fix Yourself
Although it never feels nice to be accused of behaving in a selfish or inconsiderate way towards someone, rather than get defensive about it, or worse, feeling hurt and misunderstood, use her feedback to become an even better, more well rounded man than you are right now.
In a relationship, it is the man’s responsibility to maintain the love, respect and attraction that his woman feels for him, and a big part of that is making her feel the way she wants to feel (i.e. making her feel feminine, loved, appreciated, lucky to have you, etc).
If a boyfriend stops making his girlfriend feel loved, appreciated and valued, she will become increasingly unhappy in the relationship and she will then begin to look for ways to change his behavior (e.g. threatening to break up with him, flirting with other guys to make him jealous, etc).
With you saying something like, “My girlfriend says I take her for granted,” means that somewhere along the line you stopped making her feel the way she wants to feel in a relationship, so it’s now up to you to change your approach to her and the relationship.
This is where many guys go wrong, because they think, “Why should I change who I am or what I’m doing just to suit her? If she wants to be my girlfriend she should love me exactly as I am! Isn’t that what love is?”
Guys like that assume that being “loved for who you are” means a woman should put up with a guy’s insecurities or bad behavior just because they are in a relationship.
What a lot of those guys fail to realize is that negative behaviors such as taking a woman for granted, being needy and insecure, forcing the woman to lead in the relationship, etc., are common reasons why many women break up with their boyfriend (fiancé or husband).
Unlike in the past where a woman had to “grin and bear it” for life, today’s women will leave a guy if he fails to make her feel the way she wants to feel in a relationship.
It might suck to hear that, but welcome to life as a modern man. You either know how to deepen a woman’s feelings of love, respect and attraction overtime or you don’t.
If you don’t, then you unfortunately have to suffer the consequences of getting broken up with over and over again throughout life, before you eventually work out how to be the type of man that a woman will stick with.
Right now, you can change any of your negative, unattractive behaviors and become an ever better man that you already are.
Not just for your girlfriend, but also for yourself.
By becoming a better, more emotionally balanced and well rounded version of yourself, you will not only make your girlfriend feel intense respect, love and attraction for you as a man, you will also improve other areas in your life (e.g. your relationships with friends and family, your potential of getting promoted at work, etc).
You may be a good guy already, but you become an even better man.
If you want to live a successful, happy life as a man, you should always be aiming to become an emotionally stronger, wiser and more well-rounded man than you are at the time.
Guys who keep pushing forward and reaching for their true potential as a man are the guy who others look up to and who women feel attracted to and never want to leave.
So, if you’re at a point now where your girlfriend feels like you’re taking her for granted, don’t worry.
It’s not the end of the world.
You can turn the situation around by getting her to forgive your mistaken approach and then feel a renewed sense of respect and attraction for you as a man.
When she does that, she will naturally begin to reconnect with the love that she once felt for you and your relationship will be back on track.