As a man, the fastest way to get over a breakup is to begin having sex with women who you perceive to be more attractive than your ex.
If either of those problems apply to you, I recommend that you watch these very helpful, insightful videos by Dan Bacon (founder of The Modern Man)…
Getting Over Her and Moving On
It’s tough getting over a breakup even if you were the one who decided to end the relationship.
It also doesn’t matter if it was an amicable split. However it happened it is going to be painful. You may be in a slightly depressed emotional state that will take time to heal, but if you don’t go about it the right way to deal with the end of the relationship so you can move on in a healthy way, you’ll stay in a painful, stagnant place for a long time.
You have to learn how to grow and how to become a better man so that eventually you will be able to enjoy future relationships. Without doing what is necessary, the breakup is going to be more difficult and agonizing than it needs to be. However, too many guys have the wrong ideas about how to get over a breakup and make these five mistakes that you should avoid.
Mistake 1: Not Admitting You’re in Pain
It doesn’t matter if you’re a “tough guy” or not, a breakup is a hit to your spirit and needs to be acknowledged.
In a recent season of the American reality hit, “Dancing with the Stars,” Mexican-American World Boxing Council (WBC) former champion, Victor Ortiz, suffered a breakup with a long-time girlfriend in the midst of the weekly ballroom dancing competition.
As tough as he is physically, the emotional toll still affected his concentration as he struggled to learn and perform new dances. During a rehearsal session where he was particularly distracted, he finally admitted the breakup to his professional dance partner (and the viewing audience).
He realized this admission was necessary before he could move on and find ways to deal with his heartache and still be a strong competitor.
Denying your pain won’t make it go away; it only will make it more difficult to deal with your unresolved emotions.
Mistake 2: Not Taking the Time to Understand Where You Went Wrong
Most guys have a fairly good idea why their girlfriend (fiancé or wife) broke up with them. However, since women rarely explain ALL of the real reasons why they are breaking up with a guy, most guys go away with only a partial understanding of where things really went wrong.
An example, you might want to watch this video by Dan Bacon where he explains what guys need to do to get an ex back, by first understanding the real reasons why she ended the relationship…
Mistake 3: Dwelling Only on the Good
In an effort to deal with how to get over a breakup, some men will start to focus only on the things that worked in their past relationship.
They’ll daydream about all the great times they shared with their ex. In fact, in their mind, they’ll often make the good times seem better than they were. While they concentrate on the past good times, they will also ignore any problems or bad times that likely took place which made the breakup inevitable.
Without acknowledging past issues that made the relationship unmanageable, they won’t be able to recognize how their actions (or inactions) played a part in why the split took place. Lacking a clear understanding of where things went wrong and their role in the relationship’s failure, they aren’t ready to move on because they haven’t grown as a strong man.
Mistake 4: Wanting to Get Back with His Ex No Matter What
There’s nothing wrong with a guy wanting to get his ex back and Dan Bacon (founder of The Modern Man) has already helped thousands of guys to successfully get an ex girlfriend (fiancé or wife) back. However, if a guy only wants his ex back because he doesn’t want to deal with the pain and be forced to become a better man, it’s not always the best idea.
Many guys, even if the breakup was their idea or he knew the relationship wasn’t right, will try to get back together with their ex rather than deal with the pain. The only thing they accomplish by hooking up again with their ex is delaying the pain.
If the relationship didn’t work in the past, unless there are major changes in the mindsets of one or both parties, another breakup is likely to take place and the agonizing cycle will begin again.
Mistake 5: Picking at the Wound
When a relationship dissolves it’s like a wound. It needs time and the right “medicine” to heal. That’s what happens when guys are so devastated that they do nothing but sit and think about the past relationship over and over. They simply engrain the pain deeper and deeper into their psyche.
It’s similar to having a cut on your body. If you have a cut and a scab forms, if you keep picking at it, it not only won’t heal but the chances are excellent that the cut will become infected, fester and get worse. So just like a wound, you need the right “medicine,” and time to let the healing take place no matter how uncomfortable it is in the beginning.
So, what is going to be your choice of healing medicine?
Do you want to approach and pick up new women, or do you want to become the type of guy that your ex would want back?