If you’re out there meeting women and looking to find yourself a nice girl, you will often come across single mothers who are looking for a new man for love and commitment, a one night stand or just some casual sex for a while.
In the past, a single mother would be ashamed of her position in life and would have been shunned and even disowned by her family. In today’s world, being a single mother is considered normal and acceptable and an increasing number of men are becoming open to being in relationships with these women.
Are Single Mothers Easy to Pick Up?
Generally speaking, there is less competition to date and have a relationship with a single mother than other women, because most men don’t want to pay to raise another man’s child or have to deal with the “other man” in her life.
Since there is less competition, single mothers usually don’t play as hard to get as a typical woman, so yes, it is often easier to pick up a single mom.
Since she has to spend most of her time taking care of her child/ren, most single mothers don’t have a lot of free time to spend hanging around clubs and waiting to meet a potential date.
If she’s like most single mothers, she has to plan her free time in advance around the schedule of her children, as well as find and pay for a babysitter. So when a single mom does go out on the town, she is usually doing it with a purpose – find a man, fast! She knows that she may not have another opportunity for months.
This is not to say that all single mothers are an “easy lay” or desperately looking to jump into a serious relationship immediately. Many single mothers are intelligent, savvy women who just happened to accidentally get pregnant to a boyfriend, or who had a child with a guy who didn’t turn out to be the right man after all.
So, don’t look at these women as though they are any less special, smart of deserving of your respect than other women are. Single moms are usually just the same as other women, except they are plus one.
When you meet a single mother, the same rules of attraction apply and she will looking to see if you’re a confident alpha male who will be a great boyfriend and lover or a nervous, shy or insecure guy who is hoping to get lucky.
Be Honest About Your Intentions
If you know that you’re only interested in a fling or a one night stand and definitely don’t want to be saddled with the additional responsibility of dealing with and paying for someone else’s child, it would be unfair to pretend that you’re a potential husband or father figure.
Single mothers appreciate your honesty more than you will know. They don’t want to meet guys who pretend to love their children and promise to stick around and be a father figure for them, only to suddenly stop calling a week later after they’ve had sex with her a few times.
If it feels right for you to become a father figure in her child’s life, she will think about that later. So, don’t ever feel that you need to lie to a single mother when you meet her.
That said, there are some single mothers who definitely want “just sex” or who just a replacement father figure or even someone to help pay her bills. So, how do you figure out whether the single mother you’ve encountered wants a relationship or just wants sex?
If she talks about her children a lot, asks if you have children of your own or questions whether you want children someday, especially early in your conversation, chances are good that she’s looking for a husband/replacement father and is trying to weed out any men who won’t take on that role.
On the other hand, if she doesn’t mention her children until later in the conversation and, for all intents and purposes, acts as though she is single, then she’s probably just looking to have a one night stand or casual relationship with you.
Once you know her intentions and you have determined what you want, you can take it from there. Suggesting that a single mother join you at your place for a drink (or head to her house to let the babysitter go home) will result in a “Yes” more often than other women who aren’t in as much of a rush to find a guy.
If she says, “No” just remind her of how difficult it is for her to have free time like she has that night and suggest that she just have some fun. Most women will then happily act on that suggestion and open themselves up to having a fun, one night stand with you.
Accept the Limitations
If you are open to dating a single mother for a possible long-term relationship, you need to recognize that she will have certain limitations in terms of how available she will be for you. For instance, when you’re dating a single mother, last-minute dates are pretty much out of the question.
If you’re sincerely interested in her, you have to be willing to give her enough advance notice when you ask her out, so that she can make arrangements to find someone to watch her kids. She also may have to cancel many dates with you unexpectedly if one of her children is sick or needs her. Don’t take it personally.
Single mothers tend to have a lot more additional expenses than other women, so you might want to offer to pay for a babysitter on occasion. She may reject your generosity, but she’ll consider it very thoughtful that you offered.
Dealing With Her Ex
When in a relationship with a single mother, you will have to deal with an ex-boyfriend or ex-husband at some stage. After all, someone fathered her child. As you get deeper into the relationship, you should anticipate that her children eventually will become a part of your life as well.
If you can handle not being the center of her world and are secure enough and willing to deal with all that comes along with dating a single mother, then you just may find that the rewards of finding your perfect woman – baggage and all – is worth all of the extra effort you have to put into the relationship.
Dating a single mother is an increasingly common relationship option in the modern world, because most people don’t stay together for life anymore. Marriage is on the decline, we’re living longer and it has now become socially acceptable to have a “Baby Mama” (a woman who has your baby, but is not married to you or even in a committed relationship with you) or “Baby Daddy.”
As a modern man, you can’t always look to your parents or grandparents as role models of how to plan your life. Things have changed and, whether we like it or not, the world will continue to change. So, if you like a certain woman – don’t worry what people think about her already having a child.
Go with what makes you happiest because 20 years from now, people will be doing much wilder and more “out there” things than dating a single mother.