It’s pretty obvious what ignoring an ex girlfriend might to do…
She might miss you and call you, or she might be curious about why you’re not contacting her and call or text you to check that you’re still missing her.
On the other hand, she might be glad that you’re not contacting her and will simply get on with her life!
Ignoring your ex girlfriend is not a solution to get her back. It might get her to contact you, but it doesn’t actually get her back.
To get her back, you’ve got to be able to make her feel a renewed sense of respect and attraction for you when you next interact with her on a phone call or in person.
If she contacts you after you’ve been using the No Contact Rule (ignore your ex for 30-60 days) and you turn her off in the same old ways as you used to, or if she realizes that you’ve been ignoring her as a trick to get her to contact you, it will actually help her feel better about herself and move on easier.
She will realize that you are trying to use tricks to hopefully get her to change her mind, because you still have no idea how to make her feel a renewed sense of respect and attraction for you as a man.
The way to get a woman back is to actively make her feel respect and attraction for you the next time you interact with her. How?
Watch this video for some examples…
If you talk to your ex on the phone or interact with her in person, you just need to make sure that you are displaying the type of personality traits, behaviors and inner qualities that are naturally attractive to women.
For example: Confidence, high self-esteem, the ability to make her laugh and smile (especially if she is being cold with you), emotional maturity, masculine vibe, charisma, etc.
If you can do that, she will naturally begin to feel a renewed sense of respect and attraction for you because you clearly have changed and improved.
Yet, don’t expect her to make her interest in you very obvious right away. She will almost certainly test your confidence by playing a little hard to get, giving you mixed messages and being indecisive to see how you handle yourself.
As long as you remain confident, relaxed and continue to believe that you are making her feel a renewed sense of respect and attraction for you, she will be impressed and won’t be able to stop herself from feeling attracted to your emotional strength and maturity.
She will feel as though you deserve to be respected again because you’re not the guy that she broke up with. You really have changed and improved a lot since she broke up with you days or weeks ago.
As long as you remain confident in your ability to attract her during interactions, she will relax and allow herself to have feelings for you again.
However, if you attempt to get your ex back without changing or improving anything, then you’re most likely going to turn her off in the same old ways and she’s just going to keep rejecting you and moving on.
Using the No Contact Rule
Sometimes, ignoring an ex girlfriend to get her back is referred to as the No Contact Rule, where you ignore her for 30-60 days and hope that she comes back.
Sometimes, it is a good idea not to contact your ex and wait for her to contact you, but in almost every case that I’ve dealt with to help a guy get his ex back, he actually needed to contact her right away because she didn’t have enough feelings for him to care that he was ignoring her.
My approach to getting an ex back is about rapidly fixing your issues (e.g. insecurity) and improving yourself (e.g. becoming more confident and emotionally attractive to her) and then getting her to meet up with you.
It is at the meet up that the most important part of getting her back happens. You have to know what to say and do at the meet up to get her to feel a renewed sense of respect and attraction for you.
You also need to ensure that you can build on those feelings of respect and attraction, to the point where her desire for you becomes sudden and intense. She feels like she needs to be with you.
That is what needs to happen.
Yes, sometimes a guy can ignore a girl and it will make her feel that way, but in almost all ex back cases, the woman is happy to be given the space and she then uses that time to move on with the guy.
She Didn’t Decide to Break Up With You Overnight
For a woman to reach the point where she says “I’ve had enough and I want out of this relationship,” she usually goes through a series of stages.
1. She mentally prepares herself for the break up.
When a woman realizes that she’s no longer feeling the way she wants to feel in her relationship, she begins to show her man that she’s unhappy.
If she sends out signals to her guy and he fails to notice and make changes to re-spark the attraction between himself and her, she will begin to prepare herself mentally for a break up by imagining her life without him in it.
She will begin to imagine all of the fun things that she could do without him in her life.
She thinks what it will be like getting back out into the dating game and meeting new men who make her feel more respect and attraction than her current man does.
This allows her to convince herself that a break up is not going to be all bad and may even be fun.
2. She emotionally prepares herself for the break up.
Once she can picture herself dating other guys, she prepares herself emotionally by switching off any residual feelings of love, respect and attraction she still has for her current man.
This allows her to opening herself up to meeting and feeling attraction for other men.
3. She physically prepares herself for the break up
For a woman, her ability to attract a man depends a lot on her appearance, so prior to a break up (if she doesn’t already have a replacement guy ready), a woman will work hard to improve her physical appearance.
For example: If she is usually the casual type and who likes to wear jeans and T-shirts with little makeup and then suddenly starts dieting, going to the gym more often and wearing little sexy dresses with high heels and lots of makeup, then she’s getting herself ready to look attractive for other men.
She might also become more open in her body language (e.g. smiling at random men, holding eye contact with a smile when talking to a man, flirting, etc) to send out a message to other guys that says, that says, “Hey, I’m open to flirting with you and seeing where it goes.”
So, if your ex has already gone through those 3 steps before breaking up with you, do you really think ignoring her will fix the problems in your relationship and get her back?
Probably not, right?
Sure, sometimes making a woman feel the pain of losing you by ignoring her will get her back temporarily, but if she does come back to you, she will just as quickly break up with you again when she feels emotionally ready to do so (e.g. she finds a replacement man).
If she notices that you still haven’t fixed your issues and improved yourself, it will remind her of the real reasons why she broke up with you.
She will know that she has no intention of staying with you unless you can quickly change and start giving her the attraction experience she wants in a relationship.
She will then begin to say things like, “I need more time” or “Let’s take a break” or “Maybe we could get back together in future, but for now, I need time to find myself.”
In other words, she is saying, “Wait around on your own so I can find another guy and then break up with you for real, rather than having to worry about you finding a new woman before I find a new guy.”
In most cases, by ignoring your ex girlfriend for a long period of time, you are simply giving her more time to move on with her life and have sexual and romantic experiences with new men.
By the time you decide to contact her, she may have had enough time to meet a new guy, have sex and even fall in love with him.
This only makes YOUR task to get her back more difficult because you now must ensure that you don’t talk, behave or act in an insecure way about the new guy.
Why? Being insecure about him will actually make him appear more confident and appealing than you. She will see that you feel threatened by him and will look at him as being more of an alpha male than you, which will naturally and automatically make her feel more attracted to him.
What I recommend is that you contact her immediately and arrange a meet up, or if you think that she needs a little bit of space, the maximum amount of time you should give her is 3 to 7 days.
After giving her some space, you need to meet up with her in person so she can experience the new and improved you and feel a renewed sense of respect and attraction for you.
When that happens, her guard will naturally come down and she will either get back with you right away or will become open to seeing you again and making a decision then.
Are You Ready to Re-Attract Her?
After helping 100s of guys to get an ex girlfriend, fiance or wife back, I’ve found that there are common issues that guys need help with before they are ready to re-attract their ex.
- Do you make her feel like you need her more than she needs you?
- Have you based too much of your life on her, rather than having serious, important interests outside of the relationship?
- Have you not given her enough love and attention, or have you given her too much and ended up making her feel smothered?
- Were you able to make her feel like a real woman in your presence (i.e. feminine, girly and emotional), or did you make her feel like more of a friend?
- Who wore the pants in the relationship? Was she the boss or did you lead the way?
- Did you become too controlling, or did you not even care enough about her to worry about what she did?
- Were you insecure about your attractiveness to her?
- Were you able to deepen the love, respect and attraction during the relationship, or did you make the mistake of taking her for granted and assuming that she would just stay with you because she loved you?
- Did she start to lose interest after the initial spark died out, but you didn’t know how to get it back, so you then became insecure about the relationship and possessive of her?
There are so many different reasons why a relationship will break up.
To get an ex back, you must be able to begin fixing the problems between you and her, rather than expecting her to give you another chance because things used to be good between you and her.
You have to let her feel like there is hope because you really have changed and some of the old problems that you and her had just don’t happen anymore. For example: You don’t get insecure anymore, you now make her feel like more of a real woman around you.
Here’s what you need to remember when getting your ex back…
Ignoring her does not fix your personal issues or insecurities and it doesn’t fix the problems between you. If you want to get your ex girlfriend back for real, you have to be prepared to do what it takes to improve so you can properly re-attract her.
Watch this video to understand how you can impress her when you talk to her on the phone and in person…
All it usually takes is a spark of respect and attraction and your ex will begin to think, feel, talk and behave differently when she interacts with you.
From there, you just need to build on her attraction and guide her back into a relationship.
Getting Ready to Contact Her
Before contacting your ex girlfriend, you have to make sure that you are prepared.
Here’s what you need to do:
1. Find out exactly what caused her to break up with you and begin fixing those things.
You don’t have to become perfect, but before you call her, make sure that you know what caused her to break up with you and have begun to fix those things about yourself.
- Did you become too insecure? If so, have you fixed that or are you just pretending to not be insecure now?
- Did you lack purpose in life and spend too much time with her? If so, have you begun to make progress towards your big goals and ambitions in life, or are you still hoping to just spend time with her and not worry about your purpose in life?
- Did you take her for granted in the relationship? If so, are you ready to treat her better without sucking up to her with extra nice behavior?
If you are saying to her, “Just give me another chance and I promise that if you tell me what I did wrong, I’ll change” it will only make her lose even more love and respect for you.
She will feel like you don’t understand her and don’t even know what she needs you to do to make her happy.
A girlfriend doesn’t want to be her boyfriend’s teacher about life. She wants him to know how to be a man on his own, not with her guidance.
If a guy says to his girlfriend, “Tell me what I did wrong and I promise I’ll change. I’ll do whatever you want me to do. Just tell me and I will do it,” he’s not only saying, “I don’t actually know what I’ve been doing wrong,” what she hears is, “I need you to teach me how to be a man.”
She then realizes that he isn’t ready to be the man she needs, so she decides to leave him and hope to find a guy who is ready to be the man she needs.
2. Get professional help.
Most guys make all sorts of mistakes while trying to get their woman back, which turns her off even more and makes the process more difficult.
If you want to take the quick and easy road to get your ex back this week or next, I am ready to help you right now.