The first thing you need to know about love is that it doesn’t die.
If you and your wife were once truly in love and it now seems like the love is gone, all is not lost. The love has simply been pushed into the background because of all the negative feelings that is in the foreground of her mind.
For both of you to get back in touch with the loving feelings that you once experienced together, you need to lead the way by making changes to your behavior and how you treat her. Essentially, you need to start saying and doing the types of things that will attract her to you rather than repel her further away.
When you do this correctly, the love will automatically come flooding back. Love does not die. It simply gets pushed into the background. Love is much bigger, deeper and far reaching than most people realize.
So, don’t worry – you can fix this.
Getting Her to Love You Again
Getting her to love you again begins with making her feel a renewed sense of respect and attraction for you. When you do that, she will naturally begin to connect with the love once again.
If you don’t actively make her have feelings for you again, the relationship will feel too one-sided. It will be about how much you love and need her and how much she wants to get away from you.
To fix the problem, you must make sure that from now on, the feelings are mutual in your marriage.
When you reignite your wife’s feelings of love, respect and attraction, everything starts to fix itself and she begins to look at you the way she used to.
So, don’t worry – you can do this.
It’s completely normal and natural for a man and a woman to fall back in love with each other. Millions of couples have done it before and you can do it too.
Don’t Give Up on the Love
When a guy e-mails me with something along the lines of, “Dan, my wife doesn’t love me anymore. How do I get the love back?” I sincerely feel sorry for him.
I hate to hear about marriages falling apart because I am a big believer in sticking to one’s promises. However, I’m never worried for him because after years of helping guys to be successful with women and even to get an ex back, I know that it’s easy to get a woman’s love back.
If your wife loved you before, she can love you again. You simply just need to go about it in the right way and it will begin to happen naturally and automatically.
Where Husbands Go Wrong
The biggest mistake that many husbands make is trying to fix the problem without first understanding the cause.
For example: A husband might be saying to his wife, “Okay, look…I will start cleaning up the dishes more and I’ll make more of an effort to arrange a date night for us once a month” thinking that he has the answer to what she really needs.
Yet, from her perspective, that isn’t going to make her happy in the way that she wants. Why? Depending on what makes HER happy and what SHE really wants him to improve and change, she might be happiest if he:
- Spends more quality time with her side of the family.
- Listens to her more when she ranted on about random things (like women do).
- Stops listening to her so much and instead crack some jokes sometimes when she is ranting on (e.g. Smile, laugh and say, “You’re such a drama queen…” or “Geez, it sucks to be you. I’m glad I work where I do…your job sucks” and then laugh with her).
- Looks at her as though she is the sexiest woman on Earth.
- Makes her feel happy to be spending time doing the housework because you are focused on your purpose in life and are rising through the levels of life to reach for your true potential, so you can provide for the family and become the man you are capable of being.
And so on…
Being a great husband and being attractive to a woman over the long term is not something that is taught in schools, so the majority of men simply try to fumble their way through it and hope for the best.
Some men are lucky to grow up with great male role models around them who have the skill, ability and willingness to teach them how to be a great man. Yet, most men don’t get that sort of education and are left to their own devices.
Whatever you decide to do right now, just make sure that you take the time to think about what she really wants you to improve about yourself and how you treat her. Think about the times when you’ve seen her the happiest with you and ask yourself why.
Think about the times when she’s been the most turned off by you, when she’s lost respect for you and when she has lost touch with her feelings for you.
Here’s a video that I made to explain why relationships and marriages break up and how you can avoid it happening to you…
Are you making any of the classic mistakes outlined in the video above? If so, you’ve got to start making changes now before it’s too late.
Unfortunately, marriage isn’t what it once was. In the old days, a woman had to stay with her man even if she was unhappy. It was shameful for her to get divorced so the old marital promise of “Till death do us part” really did apply.
In today’s world, a woman is free to do whatever she wants. She can get divorced and remarry if she’s unhappy. So, if you want to avoid that happening to you, make sure that you put in the effort to make some changes now.
You have to stop saying and doing the things that are ruining her love, respect and attraction for you and start saying and doing the things that will reignite her feelings of love, respect and attraction.
“She’s Lost That Loving Feeling”
The love between a man and a woman is something that needs to be taken care of, nourished and deepened over time. You can’t just take it for granted, abuse it and expect that it will continue to feel good.
If you have been taking your wife’s love for granted and haven’t been able to deepen it over time, it will have been getting pushed into the background and will feel less real and true over time.
The more that your wife disconnects with her feelings of love for you, the more that she will begin to focus on the things that she doesn’t like about you. She will become less forgiving and will start to feel annoyed and turned off by your quirks.
If that goes on for a long time, it may feel like you’ve fallen out of love with each other. Yet, in reality, you’ve just forgotten how to love each other.
As a husband, it is your responsibility to take care of the love and guide your wife into deeper feelings of respect, attraction and love for you. If you don’t do that and instead allow the love to fade into the background, things will naturally start to fall apart.
Get Her Love Back Now, Before it’s Too Late
If you are serious about wanting to save your marriage, I recommend that you take action now before she asks to separate and then opens herself up to being with other men.
As a man, it is your responsibility (not hers) to deepen the love, respect and attraction in your marriage. Most women wait for their man to lead the way to a better relationship and if he doesn’t, they simply leave.