Every woman is unique and prefers to shown that she is loved in slightly different ways.
For example: A man might say, “I love you” to his girlfriend or wife every morning and night, but if she is the type of woman who prefers to be shown that she is loved, she’s not going to appreciate the words much at all.
Think about it this way…
Do you feel most loved by a woman when she tells you or shows you by way of her actions, behavior and attitude?
If a woman only showed you that she loved you (e.g. by cooking dinners for her, cleaning up the house, ironing your clothes, asking how your day was, etc), but never said, “I love you” or didn’t say it often enough, would you feel as though she wasn’t being loving enough towards you?
Each of us require a slightly different style of love, so rather than focussing on different ways of saying “I love you” to a woman, what you really need to do is work out the exact way that your woman prefers to be shown love.
Different Ways That Women Want to Be Shown They Are Loved By You
The style of love that you need to show a woman to make her feel happy will always differ from woman to woman.
1. Some women want you to show your love through your actions.
Actions might include: Moving in with her, getting engaged to her, getting married, buying a house together, starting a family, etc.
Prior to all of that, actions might include: Taking her out to wine and dine her, doing fun things together, meeting her friends and family, etc.
However, be warned: Many guys end up turning their woman off by being way too good to her, even though she doesn’t treat him well.
You’ve got to make sure that there is a balance in your relationship where you are good to her and she is good to you.
If it’s one sided and you’re just being good to her, she will lose respect for you for not being able to get her to be a good woman for you.
She will also grow to hate the woman she is in her relationship with you (i.e. she is more selfish than she usually is, she takes your efforts for granted, she treats you badly and gets away with it).
2. Some women want you to show your love based on how you behave.
Behavior might include: Being considerate, caring, loving and respectful. It can also be when you love her unconditionally, even if she is having a bad day and happens to throw a tantrum.
3. Some women want you to show your love via gifts and financial rewards.
Gifts and financial rewards might include: Birthday presents, engagement ring, going on holidays, buying a house together, etc.
4. Some women want you to show your love physically.
Physical displays of love might include: Loving, passionate sex, hugs and kisses, massages, etc.
5. Some women want you to show your love by how deeply you connect with them.
Connecting might include: Sincerely listening to her, really getting to know the real her, loving and accepting who she really is deep down, etc.
6. Some women want you to express your love in words other than just, “I love you.”
Expressing your love in words might include saying things like: “You’re the sexiest woman on Earth in my eyes” or “You are just as beautiful without make up.”
However, some women hate it when guys are too nice and sweet all the time and sometimes, they want a bit of edge. For example: After saying, “You are the most beautiful woman on Earth in my eyes,” a guy could smile and add in, “I love everything about you, especially the way you suck my…”
3 Different Ways to Show Her That You Love Her
Okay, so let’s assume that you have the perfect relationship dynamic where she respects you as her man, she feels attracted to you and is as in love with you as you are with her.
When you do nice things for her, she appreciates it and she then puts in even more effort to become a better girlfriend, fiancé or wife for you.
If that dynamic is in place, then great – keep rewarding her with more of your precious love, attention and affection.
However, if that dynamic is in place, you need to stop kissing her ass and get her to respect you, feel attracted to you and enjoy being in love with you again. If you don’t know how to do that, I recommend that you watch Make Her Love You For Life for instructions.
With the perfect relationship dynamic in place, here are some ways to show her that you love her:
1. The Love Gaze
Studies have proven that if a couple looks into each other’s eyes for a couple of minutes and asks each other questions about their future dream scenario together, it helps them connect on a deeper level and feel happier, more excited about their future together and more excited to make it happen.
If you’re in a relationship, your woman might cringe at the idea because she might see it as being too romantic or even too serious of a thing to do. Simply laugh and tell her to try it. She will love it.
If she just wants to relax and look into your eyes for a couple of minutes without talking, it’s totally fine to do it that way too. After the Love Gaze, you can then hug, kiss or relax and talk about your dream future scenario together (e.g. you travel once a year, you have a family or you party all around the world rather than having children, etc).
2. The “3 Things I Love About You” Conversation
Go to somewhere that you can watch the sunset with a good view (e.g. beach, mountain, rooftop café or bar) and have a relaxing late Sunday afternoon chill out.
When there, tell her, “Hey, tell me 3 things that you love about me and I’ll tell you 3 things that I love about you.” If she wants you to go first, then go first to lead the way.
For example: A man might say to his woman, “I love the way that you look in the morning when you wake up, how you look when you get yourself all done up and how you look when you’re riding me on top in the bedroom.”
Of course, if she enjoys it, you can continue on with the exchange of compliments.
For example: “I love the way I can go from being pissed off to happy in a few seconds, just by seeing you smile and knowing that we are awesome together as a couple.”
3. The Loving Massage
Give her a massage when she is complaining about feeling aches or pains, especially at a time when you are feeling tired after work or at a time when you just don’t feel like doing it. This shows her that you love her enough to push through that and do it for her.
Personally speaking, my wife often complains that her legs ache because wears high heels a lot. With other women that I was in casual, sexual relationships with, I would just laugh and say something like, “Ahh, you’re always sore or aching…go get a massage,” but with my wife, I mix up the responses I give.
Sometimes I will laugh at her for being such a tender, fragile little thing and tell her to stop moaning or to go get a massage (women like it when a man mixes up his responses, rather than just being a super caring, attentive guy all the time because sometimes, the woman is just complaining and doesn’t need a serious response), but other times, I will actually sit down and give her a massage without asking for anything in return.
If I didn’t actually care about her, I wouldn’t do that and she knows it, so it’s a minor, but important expression of love.
Most Modern Women Don’t Romance to Be Soppy and Corny Like the Old Days
These days, most women still do want to feel special and enjoy a bit of romance when first dating a guy and when deep into a relationship or marriage, but they don’t like it when guys go overboard with soppy romantic gestures during the dating process or even deep into a relationship.
For example: If a guy arrives at a first date with flowers for a woman, she will usually feel as though he’s trying a bit too hard to be seen as a nice guy.
In the 1960s, bringing flowers to a date would have been fine because most women rarely had sex and many would still save their virginity for marriage. Yet, in today’s world, a woman doesn’t need a guy to show her that he’s the sweetest, most innocent guy in town before she will hold his hand.
In fact, a study in the USA found that 55% of couples had sex on their first date and a European study found that 70% of women admitted to having experienced a one night stand before.
In other words, sex happens very quickly these days and it doesn’t take flowers, a teddy bear and a box of chocolates to get the job done. All you need to do is make the woman feel attracted to you and then be the good guy that you are and she will see you as a sexy, charming man.
In terms of relationships, there’s nothing wrong with a bit of romance, but a woman will only appreciate it if she respects her man, feels attracted to him and is still in love with him.
If you’re a romantic guy at heart, this doesn’t mean that you should go against your nature and pretend to be someone you’re not (e.g. a careless bad boy, an asshole who doesn’t care about women, etc), but it is worth stepping back for a moment to consider whether your “romantic” actions are generating the type of responses that you really want.
Tuning Into Her Style of Love
If you have a girlfriend, fiancé or wife and you want to take your love to a deeper place that will strengthen your relationship, you need to tune into what style of love she prefers and really wants to experience with you.
For example: Does she need you to come up with different ways of saying I love you, or does she actually want you to show it via your behavior or actions? Is she happiest when you show her how much you care, tell her how much you care or a combination of both?
How does she want you to express your love for her? What will make her the happiest?
Of course, sometimes a woman doesn’t know how to express it and if you ask her, she might say, “I don’t know…as long as you love me and we stay together, I don’t care,” but if you pay attention, you will be able to pick up on what kind of love expression she responds to the most.
You then need to stop wasting time expressing love in ways that you think are important and focus in on what she cares about the most.
A word of warning though…
As a man, you have to ensure that your woman loves you and respects you in return. You shouldn’t ever have a relationship dynamic where you’re always giving to her and not expecting anything in return.
Women resent men who do that.
Love needs to be a two-way thing, so if you are giving love to your woman and she’s not giving it in return, you need to address that with her.
If you are being a great man to her and she respects you and feels attracted to you, then she will naturally express love to you in her own unique way. You won’t have to tell her to do it, because she will naturally do it.
However, if she happens to be a little immature when it comes to love and relationships, she might make the mistake of taking your love for granted.
In cases like that, you need to point it out and let her know that you are disappointed in her and know she can do better than that, but that you forgive her if she has simply made a mistake because she wasn’t aware that she was behaving in that way.
A woman wants to be able to express her love for you in her own unique way, but if she’s not doing a good enough job of it, there’s nothing wrong with telling her where you’d like to see some improvements.
Essentially, you need to tell her where you’d like to see improvements, but you also need to show her that you are emotionally strong and secure with or without those improvements.
Women are naturally attracted to the emotional strength in men (e.g confidence, high self-esteem, etc) and turned off by emotional weakness (e.g. insecurity, self-doubt, etc).
She doesn’t want to feel as though you will be insecure unless she showers you with love and affection.
She wants to see that you are emotionally strong and secure no matter how much love she shows you, but she also wants to see that you don’t allow her to take you for granted.
Most women hate it when a man lets himself be walked all over by a woman. She wants you to love and respect her, but not be a doormat for her to walk all over.