How can you be a challenge in a relationship with a woman, where it becomes a lifelong quest for her to win your affection, to win you over, to impress you?
How can you put yourself in that position, rather than being in the position that a lot of guys find themselves where they’re trying to get their girlfriend or wife to love them more and more and nothing that they do seems to work?
The dynamic never seems to change.
She doesn’t look at him with love in her eyes, want to win his affection or be good to him in the ways that matter to him.
He doesn’t ever get to experience that with her.
He may have experienced it at the start, but the relationship has changed.
She no longer looks at him in that way.
There are so many examples that I can give you of how to be a challenge in a relationship with a woman, so she is trying to win your affection win you over and impress you.
In this video, I’m going to give you four examples.
Let’s begin with number 1…
1. Don’t worry about what she is thinking or feeling from moment to moment
Women feel more attracted to a man who stops thinking about them moments after a conversation has ended.
They don’t feel attracted to a guy who is talking to them and then worries about what he has just said and how that may have affected how she feels.
For example: A guy who asks questions like, “What are you thinking?” or, “What does that look mean?” from a place of insecurity where he’s trying to figure out what she’s thinking.
Does she love him?
Does she feel attracted to him?
Is she into him in that moment?
What is she thinking?
What’s she feeling?
The thing is, it’s fine for a man to ask questions like that if he’s asking it from a place of confidence; if he’s doing it from a place of confidence.
For example: If he’s sitting next to his girlfriend or wife, has just been flirting with her and she gives him a bit of a look, he can then say something like this.
“Hey, what’s that look all about? Someone’s feeling a bit horny, aren’t they?”
Or something like this.
“What was that look for, huh? What are you trying to say? You want to jump on me right now? Come here.” (Watch the video at the top of this page to hear the tonality used and see the body language expressions that go along with the words).
That type of interaction between a boyfriend and a girlfriend, or a husband and a wife is totally fine.
That’s going to create a spark of attraction.
That’s going to be fun for them and so on.
Yet, if a man is asking questions about what a woman is thinking, or why she looked at him in a certain way from a place of insecurity, then it’s not going to be fun for either of them.
The man is essentially placing too much importance on the random fluctuations in a woman’s mood.
The random subtle changes in her body language are throwing him off.
He is unsure about his position in her life.
Does she feel attracted to him?
Is she losing attraction for him in that moment?
What’s going on?
What is she thinking?
Why is she behaving like that all of a sudden?
He’s concerned, he’s worried, he’s insecure.
So, when a woman is in a relationship with a man who is constantly trying to win her affection, attention and win her over and is worried about the fluctuations in her mood and body language, then it’s not a challenge for her.
She can see that her man is coming at her 100% of the time with full interest and trying to work out what she is thinking from moment to moment.
In other words, she is a challenge for him.
He is in the position where he is chasing, he is pursuing.
The thing is, if a man wants to have that type of relationship with a woman, he can do that.
A man can do whatever he wants to do.
Yet, if a man wants to be in a relationship with a woman who is pursuing him, being affectionate towards him, being loving towards him and trying to win him over, then he needs to allow her to be in that position, rather than taking the position of the chaser and pursuer by worrying what she is thinking, trying to understand her, trying to figure out what she’s thinking from moment to moment.
When a guy takes the approach where he’s trying to figure out his woman’s thoughts and feelings from moment to moment, day to day, week to week, month to month and so on, he can end up thinking that his woman is crazy or bipolar.
One day she’s like this and the next day she’s like that.
One moment she’s smiling and happy, the next moment she’s pushing me away and she’s sitting on the other side of the couch.
What’s going on?
Why is she like this?
As a man, what you need to understand is that you don’t need to follow a woman’s change in mood from moment to moment, minute to minute, hour to hour, day to day and so on.
If a man follows a woman’s changing moods, is constantly thinking about it and concerned about how she’s behaving, then the woman is going to get frustrated.
She’s going to see that her man is looking at her as the leader between the dynamic between him and her.
She doesn’t want to be the leader where the man is following her moods.
A woman wants to be in a situation where a guy can be unreactive and reactive, depending on what he wants to do, rather than always being reactive to her changing moods and behavior.
So, part of being a challenge is you reacting if you want to react and not reacting when you don’t want to react.
It’s about you being in control of your emotional state, rather than her being in control of your emotional state and you constantly following her changing moods, trying hard to make her happy, keep the peace between you and her and so on.
Okay, the next one, number 2…
2. Make her feel motivated to improve and to impress you
A mistake that some guys make is to not expect their woman to improve or to impress them.
A guy doesn’t want to put that type of pressure on his woman.
He doesn’t want to make her annoyed.
He doesn’t want to make her feel pressured and potentially then leave him, or get angry at him.
He’s seen her when she’s throwing a tantrum.
She also may have threatened to break up with him at one point, so he doesn’t want to push it.
He doesn’t expect her to improve anything, or to try to impress him because he feels like she is the more valuable one in the relationship, so he needs to be careful, otherwise he’s going to get dumped.
Alternatively, some guys go to the other extreme where they demand that their woman improve.
The guy demands that she is more affectionate.
The guy demands that she is nice and sweet all the time, rather than being a little bit difficult at times to test his confidence.
He doesn’t want any part of that.
She has to be sweet, docile and do what he says at all times, otherwise, he’s going to get angry at her.
Both of those approaches don’t work.
With the first approach, the woman doesn’t feel like there is any challenge and she takes the guy for granted.
She’s bored of him and it usually results in a breakup or cheating.
With the second example, they get into fights all the time.
The woman doesn’t feel respected.
She feels like her man is insecure, he’s too emotional and it becomes very difficult to sustain a relationship.
If the guy goes too far and becomes too angry at her, too controlling and too aggressive, she may get to the point where she breaks up with him and just wants to get away from him.
So, what is the solution?
Well, what you need to do is give her the feeling that she has got something to lose.
If she doesn’t try to improve herself and impress you, she could lose you.
You don’t need to make her feel that way by threatening to break up with her.
Instead, you do it in a loving way where you make her feel increasingly attracted to you as the relationship continues.
She feels so much respect, attraction and love for you that she realizes it would be very difficult, if not impossible, to find another guy like you out there.
She knows that she has found a guy who makes her feel amazing and she has got something to lose now.
She needs to improve herself and impress you, otherwise you may lose interest in her.
3. Don’t let her control you with ridiculous rules
If a man puts himself in the position where he’s trying to win over his girlfriend or his wife, he’s trying to win her affection, he’s trying to live up to her expectations and standards, then she is going to come up with what I call ridiculous rules.
For example: She may say to her boyfriend, “You can pat me on the butt, but you can’t squeeze me on the butt” or, “We can sit next to each other on the couch, but you have to sit over there” or, “We can text, but only text me from 10:00 PM to 11:00 PM” and so on.
If a guy listens to her ridiculous rules and starts to abide by them, he becomes less and less of a challenge for her.
She can essentially control him because he is trying to win her affection.
He is trying to win her love.
He is trying to live up to her expectations and standards.
He’s worried about potentially losing her.
Now, that doesn’t mean that every request that a woman comes up with in a relationship is ridiculous.
It’s just the ones that are ridiculous such as, “You can pat me on the butt, but you can’t squeeze me on the butt” or, “We can go to the movies, but I’m never going to watch an action movie with you. I’m only going to watch a romantic comedy or a cartoon.”
If a woman comes up with ridiculous rules like that, a man needs to be able to laugh at her.
He needs to be able to not take her ridiculous rule seriously.
He doesn’t need to be taking her seriously and thinking, “Wow, I need to abide by her rules now, otherwise I’m going to lose her.”
So, how can a man respond?
Well, some guys might think that a man just needs to put his woman back in her place and say, “Hey, we’re going to watch whatever movie I decide on. I’m the man. You come along with me, end of story!”
Yet, that’s not done out of love and it’s not going to work in a long-term relationship or marriage.
Instead, what a man can do is say something like this.
“Yeah, whatever. Look, we’ll watch a romantic comedy or a cartoon tonight, but next time, we’re going to watch an action movie. Next time we go to the movies, it’s action.”
Now, if the woman says no to his idea of watching an action movie the next time, he simply needs to say, “Okay, no movie tonight. Let’s just stay at home.”
He doesn’t need to abide by her ridiculous rule.
He doesn’t need to take it seriously.
He also doesn’t need to become angry at her, get into an argument and try to convince her to please let him watch an action movie the next time.
Instead, he has said to her “Cool, we’ll watch a romantic movie tonight or a cartoon or whatever, but next time we’re going to watch an action movie.”
He’s being mature about it.
He’s being a loving, respectful man, but he’s also letting her see that he’s not following her ridiculous rule of, “Hey, we’re only ever going to watch romantic movies or cartoons at the cinema.”
By the way, with the ridiculous rule where a woman says to her boyfriend or husband he can pat her on the butt, but not squeeze her on the butt, he can say something like this to her, “Whatever. No squeezing of the butt, but patting of the butt. I’ll tell you what, from now on, all you’re getting is butt squeezes from me, come here.”
They can then have a laugh about that together and in most cases, a woman is going to respect her man for not taking her ridiculous rule seriously.
However, some women are a little bit more feisty and some are a little bit more stubborn, so in that moment a woman might say that she’s serious and that she only wants butt pats, but no butt squeezes.
Additionally, in a worst-case scenario, a woman might even say to her boyfriend or husband that if he continues to squeeze her butt, then she’s going to break up with him.
In that case, he can then jokingly, lovingly say something like this to her.
“Oh, poor you! You got your butt squeezed. Imagine this, we break up and you go and talk to your girlfriends about how we’ve broken up and they ask you what happened and you say…he squeezed my butt. He squeezed my butt! I told him to pat it, but he squeezed it.”
Yet, sometimes a woman will come up with ridiculous rules in the relationship because she’s testing how much her man will actually put up with, how much of her BS he will take seriously, how much power she has over him.
Will he stop taking her BS seriously?
Will he be a bit of a challenge for her, or will he always be trying to live up to her standards and expectations and follow her increasingly ridiculous rules on how he needs to behave around her?
The next example of how to be a challenge in a relationship with a woman is to…
4. Let her win you over about certain things
For example: A girlfriend says to her boyfriend or a wife says to her husband, “Let’s go out and eat Italian food tonight.”
The guy doesn’t immediately have to say yes.
He can say yes if he wants to, if he’s in the mood for eating Italian food, but if he’s not in the mood for eating Italian food that night, he can say something like this, “Well, I’ve actually been in the mood to eat Indian tonight, but I’m open to your suggestion about Italian. What have they got on the menu that you think I’d like?”
She then has to win you over in that moment and tell you about the garlic bread that they have, or the bolognese pasta that they have and how you like carbonara or whatever.
She has to make you want to go out and eat that, rather than you always being agreeable with her and going along with what she wants to do.
Okay, so those are a few of the many ways that I can teach you to make your woman want to impress you, want to win you over, want to be good to you.
If you’d like to learn more about how to get your woman to respect you, feel sexually attracted to you, be in love with you and always try to be winning you over, then I recommend that you watch or listen to my program, Make Her Love You For Life.
When you watch or listen to the program, you will learn the ultimate relationship dynamic that causes your woman to feel increasingly respectful, attracted and in love with you over time.
The spark doesn’t die out.
It doesn’t fade away.
It just gets stronger.
Make Her Feel Motivated to Be an Even Better Woman For You
One final point that I want to make for you in this video, is that there’s nothing wrong with a man impressing his woman or trying to improve himself to be a better boyfriend or husband for his woman.
There’s nothing wrong with that.
However, if you want to have a relationship dynamic where your woman is being affectionate and loving towards you and treats you the way she treated you at the start, then it’s important for you to be a challenge for her to win over.
It’s important to make her feel like she has something to lose if she doesn’t try to impress you, if she doesn’t improve herself and continually become a better woman for you.
It’s great to have a relationship where the man and the woman are improving and they’re becoming a better and better couple over time, but the best type of relationship dynamic is where the woman feels more need to impress you and improve herself to win you over, to win your affection, to make you love her more and more.
That type of relationship dynamic results in your woman cuddling into your arm as you walk along somewhere, cuddling into you on the couch or the sofa, initiating affection and sex when you’re in the bedroom.
It makes her want to be close to you.
It makes her want to experience moments with you.
It makes her want to find more and more of your love that you have for her.
By creating that type of relationship dynamic, you always feel respected and wanted.
You feel loved and appreciated and as a result, it’s so much easier for you to love and appreciate her.
It’s the ideal type of relationship dynamic that makes both you and her the happiest and most in love with each other.