Here are 5 of the most common reasons why a woman will still break up with a guy, even though he offered her a ring to show how committed he was:
1. A ring is an object and she’s not in a relationship with an object
Regardless of how expensive or amazing a ring is, it’s not the main thing that makes a woman want to be in a relationship with a guy.
Instead, a woman falls in love with a guy and wants to be with him because of the way he makes her feel.
Of course, some women are gold diggers or desperate and will accept a proposal from a guy because he bought her a pretty ring.
Yet, most women will only stay in a relationship with a guy because he creates a relationship dynamic that makes her feel loved, appreciated and taken care of, while at the same time, motivates her to be a good woman to him too.
So, even though you gave your ex a ring when she broke up with you, what you likely didn’t realize is that it wasn’t the ring she was after in the first place.
She may have said that she wanted to settle down, get married or start a family with you, but in most cases a woman will say that as a way of encouraging her man to level up and be more emotionally mature and reliable (e.g. because he still doesn’t have a clear purpose and direction in life and is drifting along doing odd jobs, wasting time drinking alcohol and messing around with irresponsible friends).
If he picks up on that and quickly transforms himself, she will then want to stick with him, ring or not.
However, if he continues to turn her off via his attitude, actions and behavior, she won’t care that he gave her the most dazzling, expensive ring he could find, because he’s not making her feel the way she wants to feel when she’s with him (e.g. attracted, happy, optimistic about the future).
2. Offering her a ring after she dumped him, seems insincere and a little forced
Although your ex might have wanted you to give her a ring, if she were to accept it now, the love would feel forced, rather than natural, real and spontaneous.
She would then likely always wonder, “Did he do it because he really loves me and wants to be with me for life, or was it a desperate move on his part to just stop me from leaving him?”
As a result, she would struggle to feel safe in the relationship, because at the back of her mind she might be waiting for you to change your mind.
This is why, to make her believe that you genuinely want her because you love her and not because she’s pushed you into giving her a ring by breaking up with you, you have to take the pressure off her.
You need to focus on making interactions with her over the phone and in person feel fun and relaxed, while at the same time, building her feelings for you in a way that reawakens her respect, attraction and love for you.
When she feels drawn to you again in a good way, the idea of accepting a ring from you will feel right to her, because it will be coming from your heart, rather than you being forced into it.
3. A ring doesn’t guarantee that the relationship problems will be solved
Your ex is probably intelligent and mature enough to realize that getting married, won’t solve the relationship problems that you and her have been experiencing.
So, rather than accepting your ring, pretending that nothing is wrong with the relationship and then ending up going through a divorce later on, she chose to leave you.
You can get her back, but you’re going to need to show her (in a non-desperate, non-pleading way) that you have already become the man she wanted you to be (e.g. more confident, have a clear purpose and direction in life, are more responsible and disciplined, no longer needing her emotional support to function as a man because you’ve become emotionally independent and strong).
You don’t have to be perfect in all of those areas, but you do need to have clearly improved on them.
It doesn’t take months to make improvements either.
You can literally improve, adjust and change in clearly noticeable ways within a few days, to a week.
You can then interact with her and let her experience the new and improved you, without asking her for another chance.
Just let her realize that she is attracted to you again and now feels like she doesn’t want to leave you, or lose you.
When that happens, she will naturally want to accept a ring from you or at least get back together to see how things go for a while.
From her perspective, she will be gaining something (i.e. a better relationship, more intense feelings of love, respect and attraction), rather than losing something (i.e. her time with a guy who she doesn’t believe in).
So, if your ex still left you even though you bought her a ring, she almost certainly felt as though the ring wouldn’t change anything, or fix the relationship problems you and her had, or the ways in which you were turning her off (e.g. insecurity, too emotionally dependent on her, unreliable in certain ways).
From her perspective, she felt as though it would be better to break up now, rather than risk breaking up later on when the stakes were a lot higher (e.g. you’re married and have children together, she’s older and it’s then harder for her to find a new man and start over with him).
4. A ring doesn’t change the fact that she is no longer attracted to him or in love with him
When a woman has disconnected from her sexual and romantic feelings for a guy, a ring is the last thing that will make her stick with him.
In fact, it might actually scare her off even more, because she won’t want to risk him thinking that the reason she’s breaking up with him is that he didn’t propose to her earlier, when in fact it has nothing to do with that.
That’s why, if you want your ex back, you need to focus on reactivating her feelings for you first.
One of the ways to do that is by using interactions with her from now on to create a spark between you and her.
You can do that by…
- Realizing that your confidence is one of the qualities about you that she feels most attracted to, so you don’t become insecure and nervous when she’s being closed off and distant and says that she isn’t interested in you anymore.
- Using ballsy humor to bring down her defenses and make her want to interact with you more and more.
- Playfully teasing her to create some sexual tension between you.
- Being more emotionally dominant than her so she can relax and feel totally feminine in your presence.
The more you reactivate her feelings for you, the more she will then want to spend time around you, which opens up the way for kissing and sex.
Sex speeds up the process of reconciling a relationship and stops a lot of the mind games or playing hard to get on a woman’s part.
She then drops her guard and becomes open to being your girl again.
Only then will she be happy and excited when you give her a ring.
5. A woman wants her engagement to a guy to be something she is proud of, not secretly embarrassed about
In most cases, when a woman leaves a guy, it’s after a lot of arguments, fights and near break ups.
That means, a woman’s friends, family and even coworkers will have noticed her crying, feeling sad, or looking angry and frustrated several times throughout the course of her relationship with him.
If she then suddenly tells them that she almost broke up with him, but he stopped her from leaving by giving her a ring, rather than congratulate her and feel happy for her, the will likely feel pity for her.
From their perspective, they will assume that she’s so desperate to get married, that she’s even willing to accept a man who doesn’t make her happy to make it happen.
Yet, that’s not how a woman wants to feel about her engagement.
Instead, she wants to be the envy of other women, because she’s marrying a great guy who she feels proud of and who is worthy of her love and affection.
She will then not only feel motivated to hold on to him and treat him like her king, she will also want to show him off to everyone, because she knows that he’s a catch and that she’s lucky to have him.
Get Her Back Faster By Avoiding These 4 Mistakes
1. Assuming that women can be easily tricked with rings, gifts or romantic gestures
Almost all women don’t choose to be with a guy because of what he can buy for her.
She doesn’t want to feel like she is being bought, like a hooker, or feel obligated to be with a guy because he bought something for her.
Instead, a woman chooses to be with him based on how he makes her feel when she’s with him (e.g. attracted, in love, safe, turned on, excited about the future, relaxed, happy, light-hearted).
So, when a guy tries to make her stay with him by giving her a ring, rather than see it as a romantic gesture, she instead feels he’s trying to trick her into accepting him, even though he’s not giving her the attraction experience she really wants.
For this reason, if you want your ex back, rather than trying to buy her love back, focus on making her have strong feelings for you again, based on how she feels when she talks to you and interacts with you.
That’s what really counts.
2. Becoming desperate and turning her off more than she already has been
For example: Out of desperation a guy might…
- Start begging and pleading with her to change her mind, which makes him come across as emotionally weak and wimpy and turns her off even more.
- Make promises to change and become the man she wants him to be if she will just give him another chance.
- Send her a long letter, email or series of text messages telling her how much he still loves her. However, because she no longer has feelings for him anymore, she doesn’t care and even perceives him as being selfish and only thinking about himself and what he wants.
- Ask her to tell him what he needs to do to make her change her mind, which stresses her out and turns her off more, because he needs her to help him to become a better, more attractive man for her.
She then closes herself off even more and focuses on finding a replacement man as quickly as possible, so that she can have an excuse not to have to give him another chance.
Don’t make that mistake.
The proper way to get your ex back is to focus on making her have feelings for you by quickly changing your approach to be more attractive and appealing to her.
Not in a desperate, hurried way, but in a relaxed, confident, easy-going way.
3. Assuming that all she really wants from you is commitment
In many cases, a woman will break up with a guy due to his behavior in the relationship.
- He ignored her and placed her in the background of his life due to excessive work or playing video games.
- He became addicted to drugs or alcohol and expected her to put up with it.
- He changed from being a nice, loving boyfriend to a mean, vindictive boyfriend.
- He discouraged her from pursuing her dreams and made her feel like she wasn’t good enough, because he worried that she would outgrow him and then leave him.
- He put more value on other people’s opinions (e.g. his friends, coworkers, family, even acquaintances) rather than hers.
So, to make your ex want you back you first need to be able to re-attract in the ways that really matter to her (i.e. that you level up as a man), rather than giving her things that she doesn’t actually want (i.e. a marriage proposal).
When she experiences your new, attractive behavior, she will naturally begin to feel more respect and attraction for you as a man.
She will then drop her guard and allow herself to open back up to the idea of being in a relationship with you again.
4. Hoping that if you cut off contact and wait, she will regret her decision and come back
When a woman is attractive, it’s easy for her to find a new man to hook up with sexually, date and get into a relationship with.
So, if she has disconnected from her feelings for her guy and he then ignores her for weeks or even months, in the hope that she will come running back to him, she’s probably not going to care.
Instead, she’s going to focus on finding a replacement man as quickly as possible to move on with, rather than chase after a guy she no longer loves or feels attracted to.
In a case where she is hoping that they will get back together again and he ignores her, she may take it as a sign that he doesn’t care about her anymore and feel rejected.
She will then hook up with a new man to make herself feel better.
Either way, he ends up losing out and regretting his decision for many years to come.
So, if you want your ex back, it’s up to you, not her, to make it happen.