Here are 6 of the most common reasons why an ex woman will be indecisive after a break up, as well as what a man can do to give her the clarity she needs to get back with him:
1. She likes him as a person, but doesn’t really feel much of a romantic spark with him
Basically, she likes him and cares about him, but those feelings are non-sexual and friendly, or even sisterly, rather than romantic and sexual.
As a result, she feels unsure about whether it’s worth it to give him another chance and see if things improve (i.e. he relights the spark inside of her), or if she’s better off moving on and finding a new man who does make her feel attracted.
This is why, rather than sit around waiting for your ex to stop being indecisive, or nagging her to make up her mind, the best approach is to use interactions with her to reactivate her feelings of sexual and romantic attraction for you again.
For example: Some effective ways to do that are by…
- Being more manly around her, rather than letting her dominate you with her confident personality.
- Turning conversations into laughter and fun, rather than being too serious all the time.
- Being ballsy enough to tease her and flirt with her so that she starts to feel like a sexy woman around you again, rather than like a good friend or big sister.
- Showing her that you remain confident and continue to believe in yourself and your value to her every time she says something like, “I can’t decide what I want,” rather than becoming insecure or unsure of yourself.
The more you relight the romantic spark between you and her, the more she will believe that being your girl again is what she wants.
2. He puts a lot of pressure on her to commit, but she’s the sort of girl who likes a guy who is more of a challenge
In other words, he chases after her and makes her feel that no matter what she does to him (e.g. she’s cold and aloof, she messes him around by not making up her mind), he’s still willing to put up with it and wants her back.
This doesn’t motivate her to put in any effort to impress him and try to make him chase her.
She knows that he will be predictable and boring (i.e. he’ll continue to push for a relationship even though she’s being disrespectful), so she remains indecisive.
What he doesn’t realize is that she wants him to make her feel that she needs to be on her best behavior around him and chase after him because he’s a catch, not like she’s doing him a favor by being with him.
So, if you want your ex to make up her mind and get back with you, be more of a challenge during interactions, rather than making her feel that you’re desperate for a relationship with her.
3. She doesn’t want to be with him anymore and is only pretending to be indecisive for now
A woman will do that so that her ex feels the need to treat her well, to avoid her becoming annoyed and then making a final decision, usually one that he doesn’t like.
This gives her time to move on.
Then, when she does find a new man, she may say, “I’ve thought a lot about us and I’ve decided that it’s better if we just take a break from each other for a while. I hope you understand,” as a way of letting him down easy and avoid him getting upset, angry or try to make her change her mind.
She will then focus on moving on with her new man.
Alternatively, she might just come out and tell him that she’s seeing someone else and ask him to leave her alone.
Don’t let that happen to you.
If you want your ex back, focus on making her feel attracted to you in ways that will make her want a relationship (i.e. sexually and romantically attracted).
4. She is attracted to him, but isn’t sure if she should commit to a relationship at this point in her life
Some reasons for that might be…
- She’s too young and wants to enjoy being single for a bit longer before she takes on the responsibilities of a serious relationship.
- She’s still at university and wants to finish her studies.
- She wants to make progress in her career first before she settles down.
- She’s suffering from FOMO (Fear of Missing Out) and is worried that if she settles down now, she might miss out on experiencing different kinds of love and relationships with other men.
Here’s the thing though…
If a woman is happy in her relationship with her man, nothing about the single life would be able to make her feel tempted to give up what she’s got.
She won’t want to be single again because what she has now is so much better than anything else she might experience on her own.
This is why, if your ex is being indecisive, you need to show her that being with you again will be so much better than anything else she might experience in her life without you.
When you make her feel attracted in new and exciting ways, she will quickly make up her mind to get back with you.
5. There are many things about him that she likes and many that she doesn’t
To date, he hasn’t been able to fix the things that she doesn’t like about him, so she feels nervous about getting back with him and experiencing the same problems as before.
So, if you want her to give you another chance, you need to show her that you’ve leveled up in the ways that are important to her.
For example: Some changes she might want to see in you are…
- Showing her that nothing she says and does makes you feel insecure or doubt your value and attractiveness to her or other women.
- Constantly creating a relationship dynamic where she feels motivated to be a good, loving, attentive woman to her, while you also make her feel good.
- Being ballsy enough to tease her in a loving way and make her feel desirable, rather than being too nice and neutral so she doesn’t feel a spark with you, which then makes her feel drawn to other men.
When you show your ex that you truly have leveled up in some of the ways that actually matter to her, her walls begin to crumble and she then finds it easy to make a decision (i.e. to get back with you).
6. She knows that he will put up with pretty much anything just to get to talk to her or spend time with her, so she keeps doing it
Basically, she feels as though she has power over him, so she abuses it by messing him around and acting like she’s indecisive, when in reality she’s not.
Here’s the thing though…
A woman wants to be with a man that she can look up to and respect, not a guy that is willing to let her push him around and manipulate him, just for a chance to be with her again.
She might give him the impression that she wants to be in control, but she’s not going to respect him if he actually falls for it and hands his power over to her.
If she can’t respect him, she won’t be able to feel sexually attracted to him and without those two things in place, being in a relationship with him isn’t something that appeals to her romantically.
So, don’t give your ex power over you by letting her decide.
Instead, maintain your confidence with her and focus on re-sparking her feelings for you every chance you get.
The more respect and sexual attraction she feels, the faster she will come to the conclusion that you’re the only man she wants.
Make Her Decide to Get Back With You Faster, By Avoiding These 5 Mistakes
1. Not having the guts to give her a week of space, before contacting her and re-attracting her
If you maintain almost constant contact with your ex, she will eventually block you, or say that it’s over and she doesn’t want to speak to you anymore.
On the other hand, if you give her a week of space, where you don’t contact her at all (not even 1 little text), you will give her a chance to actually begin missing you and maybe even start wondering if you’re moving on without her.
Then, when you call her after a week, she will almost certainly be happier to hear from you than she has been up to now.
Then, focus on re-sparking some of her feelings for you again so she starts to feel drawn to you again in a good way and wants to meet up with you.
You may then be surprised at how quickly she decides that she wants to give you another chance.
2. Asking her why she is so indecisive
If she doesn’t know how to explain it to you she’s going to feel cornered by your question and may become defensive and closed off.
Additionally, she doesn’t want to explain it to you.
Instead, she wants you to take the lead and make some adjustments to your approach to attraction with her.
She can then make up her mind based on the man you truly are, not the man she told you how to be.
3. Showing her how upset and insecure her indecisiveness is making you feel
Regardless of how frustrating it might feel to be waiting for your ex to decide what she wants, getting upset and insecure over it is one of the surest ways to turn her off and convince her you’re not the right guy for her.
Remember: Women want a confident, emotionally strong man who remains strong no matter what life or a woman throws at him.
So, if she notices that you’re losing it over her indecisiveness, she’s going to take it as a sign that you’re none of those things and therefore, not the guy she wants to be in a relationship with.
The truth is, you will have a lot more success in getting her to make up her mind about being a couple again when you portray some of the qualities and personality traits that are naturally attractive to women (e.g. confidence, emotional strength, self-belief, manliness), rather than by losing control of your emotions.
So, make sure you approach getting her back from a position of strength rather than weakness.
4. Assuming that she will be impressed if you remain loyal to her, even when she moves on
Sometimes, a guy thinks that if he remains loyal to his ex and doesn’t go out or have fun without her, she will take it as a sign that he really does love her and want him back.
Yet, it doesn’t work that way.
A woman doesn’t want a guy who is stuck in a rut in his life and can’t be happy and forward moving without her.
She wants to know that if she gets back with him, it’s because he’s a catch and she will be lucky to have him, not because she’s doing him a favor.
This is why, if you want your ex to stop being indecisive, don’t be afraid to let her see that you’re actually getting on with and enjoying your life without her.
It actually makes her feel worried about losing you.
As a result, she quickly makes up her mind about being your girl again.
5. Not knowing that you can easily turn the tables and make her really want to be with you again
The truth is, the decision about whether you and your ex get back together again is not up to her.
When you take control of the ex back process by focusing on actively re-attracting her, rather than hiding in the background and hoping she will eventually make up her mind about you, everything changes.
She realizes that you’re the kind of man she always wanted you to be (e.g. confident, persistent, motivated, emotionally strong) and her walls naturally start crumbling.
She then wants to get back together again because it’s in her best interests to do so (i.e. she will be getting the man of her dreams).
So, take the lead and get her back while you still can.