That’s usually a woman’s way of saying that you’ve been obsessing over her since the break up.
For example: You’ve been texting her and calling her way too much, begging and pleading for another chance and panicking about losing her.
To calm down your feelings of panic and worry, you need to start using a different approach of attracting her back, rather than trying to convince her to give you another chance.
What you need to understand is that when a woman breaks up with a man, it’s mainly because she has lost respect and attraction for him over time.
Her feelings of love get pushed into the background and get replaced by negative feelings such as frustration, resentment and disappointment, and she then decides breaks up with him.
This is why the main thing that a guy has to do to get his ex back is to get her to feel a renewed sense of respect and attraction for him.
If you spark her feelings for you again and she begins to reconnect with the love that she used to feel for you, her guard will come down and she will open up to interacting with you again.
However, if you behave in ways that keep turning her off, that’s just not going to happen.
Classic “Crazy Ex Boyfriend” Mistakes to Avoid
Some common mistakes that guys make when they are desperate to get their ex back include the following…
1. Trying to beg her back.
It’s natural for a guy to feel upset when he gets broken up with, especially when he is still in love with his girlfriend (fiancé or wife).
He might say to himself, “I don’t want to break up with her! I still love her. She is the only woman that I’ve loved in this way. She means so much to me. I am not going to let her go without a fight!”
So, what does he do then?
He tries to beg her back.
For example: He might use every chance her gets to interact with his ex (e.g. via text messages, on social media, over the phone, or in person), to beg and plead with her to take him back.
He may say things like, “I’m sorry! Please, just listen to me. Please forgive me! I will do anything you want me to do, just give me another chance. Please don’t do this to me. You know how much you mean to me. Please just give me one more chance.”
He might even go as far as to start crying and say, “I beg you! Please don’t do this to me! I can’t live without you!”
Although this is something that you might see a Hollywood actor saying and doing to get the girl back in a romantic movie, in the real world, this rarely works. Why?
One of the main reasons why begging, pleading, and crying doesn’t work, is because women are not attracted to the emotional weakness in men (e.g. a lack of self confidence, an inability to handle what life throws at him).
Women are attracted to the emotional strength in men (e.g. confidence, determination, the ability to face his problems head on).
So, when a guy begs and pleads with a woman for her to give him a second chance, she will naturally perceive him as being emotionally weak and it will turn her off even more.
He then begins to feel hopeless because nothing that he is saying or doing is working, which then makes him look desperate and lost and it turns her off even more.
She then begins telling everyone that he is crazy because he’s trying to get her back and is becoming more and more desperate and unattractive.
However, her saying that is not the end of the world.
As long as you change the way you talk to her and interact with her from now on, you can turn it around and use it to spark some feelings of respect and attraction in her.
For example: The next time you interact with her on a phone call, or in person, you can laugh and say to her, “Wow! I was being a bit of an emotional wimp there for a while, wasn’t I? I guess I overreacted like that because I still love you and I want us to be together. However, I know I should have been more mature about it and I accept your decision.”
Will saying that fix everything between you and your ex?
No, but it’s a start.
To get your ex to want to get back together again, you have to focus on making her feel respect and attraction for the new version of you, every time you interact with her.
2. Thinking that constantly pouring his heart out to her will change her mind.
If a woman says to a guy, “It’s over between us, I don’t want to be with you anymore,” he might decide that the only way to make her change her mind is by repeatedly telling her how much she means to him.
He might say things like, “I want you to know that I love you more than anything else in life. What we had together was so special and I will treasure it for the rest of my life. I really don’t want us to be over because I believe that we can fix this. I ask you to please think about all the good times we had together, rather than just throwing our relationship in the trash like it meant nothing. One more chance is all I’m asking for and I’ll show you that things can be different between us.”
Yet, here’s the thing…
A woman doesn’t care how much a guy cares for her if she doesn’t have feelings for him anymore.
Even though he’s trying hard to make her see how much he really cares for her, she’s usually going to just say something like, “I know you care for me, but I think it’s better for both of us if we go our separate ways.”
Essentially, what she’s saying, is that she just doesn’t feel any respect and attraction for him at the moment, and more importantly, she doesn’t believe that he even knows how to make her have those feelings for him again anyway, so she doesn’t see any point in giving him another chance.
He’s just going on and on about how much he cares for her, but that’s not triggering her feelings for him.
So, if you want your ex to stop telling everyone that you’re crazy, and to get her to start taking you seriously again, you need to make her have some feelings for you first, otherwise she’s not going to care that you still love her.
3. Thinking that constantly that texting her will keep him on her mind and will stop her from moving on.
When a woman isn’t open to seeing her ex in person, or even talking to him on a phone call, he will usually try to stay on her mind via text.
For example: He might think, “If I can’t talk to her, and if she’s refusing to see me in person, what is going to stop her from meeting another guy and moving on? I’ve got to do something to stop her! I’ve got to stay on her mind 24/7 and hopefully something that I text her will make her realize that she misses me and wants to give me another chance.”
Yet, here’s the thing…
When a woman is going around telling everyone, “My ex is crazy,” he’s clearly not saying or doing anything that is sparking her feelings of respect and attraction for him as a man.
She’s probably even feeling annoyed by him, and all the things he’s already been doing trying to get her to give him another chance (e.g. begging, apologizing, convincing) which means that anything else that he does is likely going to be misinterpreted by her as another desperate attempt to get her back.
Constantly texting her as a way of stopping her from moving on is one of the worst things he could do.
Firstly, in most cases, the texts are pointless conversations, (e.g. “How was your day?” or “What are you up to?”), or desperate attempts from the guy to stay in touch with her in whatever way he can.
Yet, those texts usually do nothing more than annoy her further.
Rather than thinking to herself, “Wow, how sweet. My ex is so caring. He wants to know how my day was. Awww, what a great guy” she will probably start to ignore him or be rude and tell him to get lost and leave her alone.
Secondly, if his ex is already telling everyone how crazy he is, the next thing will be telling everyone is that he is stalking and harassing her if he keeps up the constant texts.
Lastly and most importantly, this type of texting doesn’t do anything to renew a woman’s feelings of respect and attraction for a man.
If anything, it convinces her even more that he’s not the mature, alpha male that she is looking for in her life.
So, if you want to get your ex back for real, don’t waste a lot of time texting her about random things in the hopes that you will be on her mind and in her heart in a positive way.
When getting an ex back, the only time you should be texting her is to get her on a phone call, so you can then arrange a meet up, where you can make her feel a strong, renewed sense of respect and attraction for you.
4. Having absolutely no idea how to make her feel respect and attraction for him again.
Right now, your ex is telling everyone that you’re crazy because she has lost all respect and attraction for you based on your recent actions.
So, she’s not going to start wanting you back unless you make a sudden, dramatic change in how you communicate and interact with her.
She’s going to be behaving coldly towards you and she’s going to be saying things like, “Why won’t you just leave me alone?” or “You need to face reality – it’s over between us. Move on.”
She will be trying to push you away, get away from you, and make it clear that she just doesn’t have feelings for you anymore.
However, when you make some changes and improvements to your communication style with her (e.g. remain confident no matter what she says, make her smile and laugh, react differently when she’s trying to pick a fight) she will naturally begin to change her perspective of you, drop her guard and open back up to you.
On the other hand, if you continue to interact with her in ways that turn her off, then she’s just going to be saying, “You’re crazy! Leave me alone!” because you’re not moving past the level you were at when she broke up with you.
You are still saying and doing that same kind of things that made her lose respect and attraction for you in the first place.
Changing Her Perception of You
When you interact with your ex from now on, you need to allow her to experience the new and improved version of yourself that is no longer behaving in the ways that were turning her off in the past.
For example: If you’ve been obsessing over her, calling her up or texting her all the time or telling her that you can’t live without her, you now need to change that.
You need to show her via your actions, behavior, body language and the way you interact and respond to her, that you are now an emotionally strong man that she can look up to and respect.
All it takes is a quick interaction on a phone call, or in person, to make her feel a new spark for you based on how differently you are now communicating and interacting with her.
During the interaction, she will sense the changes in you and will then test you by playing hard to get, pretending that she doesn’t want to listen to you, and by calling you crazy, in the hopes that you will lose it, and prove to her that you’re still the same guy that she broke up with.
However, if you can remain composed no matter what she says to you, how she treats you, or how she tests you, and continue to make her feel respect and attraction to the new version of you, she will open back up and be willing to spend time with you.
Initially, she might try to ignore her reactivated feelings of attraction for you, but as long as you keep building on her feelings, she won’t be able to stop herself wanting to interact with you.
She will want to keep interacting with you because it now feels good, interesting and enjoyable.
She will also want to interact with you more to see if you have really changed, or if you’re only putting on an act to try and get her back.
Once you’ve reactivated her feelings and shown her that the new you is real, you just need to continue building on her respect and attraction for you, and guide her back into a relationship.