Here are the 5 most common reasons why a woman break up with her boyfriend due to his use of pot:
1. She doesn’t like how it affects your ambition and progress as a man
Sometimes, smoking weed can make a man feel so relaxed and laid back, that he ends up not caring very much about progressing through the levels of life like other men.
For example: He doesn’t set big goals for himself and work towards achieving them, doesn’t make headway in his chosen career, doesn’t have any plans for his and his woman’s future together.
Alternatively, he does have big goals, but in reality, they are really just big dreams that he talks about, but never achieves.
In other words, he’s a dreamer, rather than a doer.
Alternatively, he does try hard to make progress in life, but due to being high most of the time, his output is dull and doesn’t end up being good enough to make him succeed.
So, even though he might feel like everything is going along fine in his life and relationship, his woman will be wondering things like, “Is this it? We’re stuck in a rut and not making much progress in life and all he wants to do is smoke weed. I see the boyfriends or husbands of my girlfriend’s or family who have goals and dreams and they’re making a lot of progress. Yet, we’re not. It makes me feel embarrassed around them that my life has turned out like this. I’m always making excuses for him and saying that he’s going to change and improve, or that he’s going to get off his butt and succeed at what he’s being trying to do, but deep down I know that it’s probably a lost cause. I thought him smoking weed was just a passing phase and that he’d eventually get over it, but he’s just gotten worse.”
If she then gets to the point where she doesn’t feel confident that things will change, she may decide to just break up with him and try find herself a man who is moving through the levels in life, so she can feel safe about a future with him.
How about you?
Have you remained stuck in your a comfort zone in life and stopped making a lot of progress?
Alternatively, have you been trying to make progress, but you haven’t really been succeeding?
Is it possible that if you were more clearheaded, you would be sharper and be much more likely to succeed?
Have you been relying on pot a little too much?
The thing is, there’s nothing wrong with smoking pot.
Yet, if it gets in the way of your life and relationships, it then becomes a problem.
It’s the same with drinking, playing video games, jerking off to porn, overeating, etc.
There’s nothing wrong with any of those things, but if you do it excessively, it begins to negatively affect your life and relationships.
So, if you’ve gone too far with pot by smoking it too often, don’t worry about it.
You’re not a villain for doing that.
Yes, you made a mistake, but now you know better and you can easily change and improve and show your ex that you’ve become the kind of man she can feel proud to come back to.
A good way of doing that is by moving forward in your life without her.
Now is the time to go ahead and make progress towards fulfilling your goals, dreams and ambitions in life.
- If you have a big dream in life that you’ve neglected because of your weed smoking habits, now is the time to pick up where you left off and make things happen.
- If you have been trying to succeed in life, but the overuse of weed has clouded your efforts and gotten you crappy results, then you now have an opportunity to cut back on pot and start making progress.
- If you’re not sure what you should be aiming for in life, ask yourself, “What is my biggest dream, goal or ambition? What do I wish I could do with my life? What do I want to achieve, be or become? What is the most challenging, but meaningful thing that I want to work on for my entire life?”
- If you’ve been stuck in a dead-end job, start looking for ways to improve that (e.g. find another, better job, apply for a promotion, go back to university and improve your qualifications so that you can advance in your chosen career, take a nighttime course to improve your skills in a particular area, so you can then get a better job).
The world really is your oyster and you can choose to do whatever you want and be whoever you want in this life.
If you just want to smoke weed and run the risk of letting relationships pass you by, then go ahead and do that.
Yet, if you want to have the best of both worlds where you can smoke occasionally, have a successful relationship and a successful life, then try to do things in moderation from now on.
Eventually, you might find that you only smoke once every month and then once every few months and then only on special occasions.
It’s up to you.
Yet, one thing is for sure…
When you begin to move forward in life and get to the point where you have big goals, dreams and ambitions, not only will you become a better man as a result, you will suddenly become more attractive to your ex as well.
You become the kind of man she can look up to, respect, feel attracted to and feel proud to come back to.
A woman naturally loves and feels attracted to a man who knows who is and what he wants in life.
So, when your ex sees that you’re no longer wasting your life and are actually leveling up as a man, she will naturally begin to look at you with different eyes.
She may also start to feel worried about losing out on being with the new and improved version of you, which then makes her drop her guard and open herself up to interacting with you more.
From there, you just need to reawaken her feelings of respect and attraction for you, so she finds herself doubting her decision to break up with you.
It then becomes easy for you to get her back into a relationship that is stronger and better than before.
Another reason why a woman will break up with you because you smoke too much weed is…
2. She is bored of how chill your life seems to be
Not all women like to be in a relationship with a guy who is always busy, likes going out partying or doing things (e.g. traveling, volunteering, participating in sports/political campaigns/neighborhood watches) and who is an overly active extrovert.
In fact, some women enjoy a more mellow lifestyle where her and her man can just relax and take things easy together (e.g. take walks on the beach or in the park, watch movies, go to museums, stay at home and just hang out).
So, if a guy smokes weed and is quite mellow, it will appeal to certain types of women.
However, over time, his overly laid back approach can begin to feel boring to her and she may begin thinking things like, “Life with him is so boring. I want some action in my life every now and then. Not all the time, but sometimes it would be nice to do something exciting like go to a club and dance the night away, or go on an adventure holiday, or take up a new hobby together. Anything that’s different and a bit more exciting than our hum-drum lifestyle. I liked it initially, but it’s getting stale. All he really does is get high and chill. If I don’t get high with him, we’re on a completely different level. I want to do things and he doesn’t. He just wants to get high and chill.”
If he also allows smoking weed to negatively affect their sexual and emotional connection (i.e. because he’s too stoned to talk or too tired to have sex and they end up being more like friends or roommates than lovers), she may start questioning why she’s bothering to stay with him.
Some women will put up with that kind of relationship for years, but it will rarely last because the foundation of the relationship (i.e. lack of connection, lack of sex, lack of progress in life) is just too weak to justify sticking around for life.
Of course, if a woman breaks up with a guy like that, it doesn’t always mean that all of her feelings for him are completely gone.
In many cases, the woman still cares for her ex and thinks of him as a good guy.
It’s just that she doesn’t feel enough of a spark with him to justify staying in a relationship with him.
Fortunately though, it’s pretty easy for him to begin changing how she feels and get her back.
For example: If a guy got broken up with by his girlfriend because there wasn’t enough of a spark, he can make her feel sparks for him when they chat on the phone.
He can add in some flirting and build up sexual tension, so she naturally begins to feel attracted to him.
Suddenly, she stops feeling like they are just friends and begins to feel attracted to him in a sexual and romantic way.
As a result, she begins to see him in a new light.
Then, the idea of getting back with him starts to appeal to her once again.
Another reason why a girlfriend will end a relationship because you smoke too much weed is…
3. She can see that it’s more of an addiction than you realize
In some cases, a woman will clearly see that her guy is more affected by his weed smoking habits than he realizes.
For example: He might…
- Be forgetful and unreliable.
- Break his promises to her because he can’t be bothered following through on what he said he’d do.
- Be too stoned to fix problems in the house (e.g. leaking tap, broken toilet).
- Have problems concentrating at work or while driving.
- Make poor decisions and may put himself (and her) into potentially dangerous situations.
- Sometimes experience experience fear, anxiety or delusions in situations where other guys would be completely calm and at ease.
- Feel paranoid and distrustful of other people.
If she notices that, she might begin to nag and complain to her boyfriend in the hopes that he will realize that he has a problem and do something about it.
If he listens to her and takes action to improve, she will feel a deep respect for him for being an emotionally strong and mature man and the relationship will become closer.
However, if he refuses to take her concerns seriously and instead makes excuses for himself by saying things like, “You’re making too much of a big deal about this. I’m not addicted. It’s just something I do to relax. I can stop smoking whenever I want. Besides, it doesn’t really affect me. You need to stop being such a nag about it. I’m fine,” she may eventually decide to break up with him.
By the way…
As I said earlier, there is nothing wrong with smoking weed if you want to.
Yet, if you want things to work with your ex, you will need to compromise.
Every couple needs to adapt to each other and make compromises in order to make the relationship work.
In your case, it might mean you need to stop, or at least cut back on smoking weed to make your woman happy and want to be with you again.
It’s not about letting her rule your life.
Instead, it’s about being a balanced man who can give her what she needs in a relationship with you (e.g. to feel like she can depend on you, to know that you’re not going to hurt her or yourself while driving a car when very high, to stop feeling like she has to keep you in line).
When you can show your ex that you’re the kind of man she can rely on, look up to and respect, she will be more open to giving you another chance.
Important: Don’t go and tell her that she can now rely on you and then ask for another chance.
Just show her based on how differently you now think, talk, feel, behave and act in life.
She will pick up on it.
Women are always looking out for and observing those things in a man.
When you display traits that make women feel respect and attraction, they feel it.
It’s very simple and it works.
Another reason why a woman will break up with you because you smoke too much weed is…
4. You gave her too much power over you in the relationship and now she’s trying to control you
For a woman to be able to maintain her feelings of respect and attraction in a relationship, the man has to be able to maintain his position of masculinity and not be walked all over by her.
So, if a man ends up smoking so much weed that his decision making ability becomes flimsy or wishy-washy, a woman will naturally step up and start being more bossy and demanding.
If he gives into her bossiness, she will naturally lose respect and attraction for him.
Here’s the thing…
Most women don’t want to be ‘the boss’ in a relationship with a man.
There are some women who like to dominate their man, but they are the minority.
The majority of women are not attracted to emotionally weak, wimpy men who allow themselves to be walked all over by a woman.
So, if your ex has gotten away with dominating you emotionally for too long, now is the time to stand up to her (e.g. by telling her that you’re not going to stop smoking weed for her) and take your power back.
Don’t say it in an angry way.
Say it in a confident, easy-going manner, but assertive manner.
Say it in a loving way.
Say it, knowing that, even though she may act as though she is annoyed, she will naturally feel respect and attraction for you for manning up.
The more respect and sexual attraction she feels for the new, emotionally dominant you, the less she will be able to hold on to resist giving you another chance.
Her walls will begin to crumble and then the process of getting her back becomes easier because she is open to you again.
Another reason why a girlfriend will break up with you because you smoke too much weed is…
5. She feels like you have taken her presence in your life for granted
At the beginning of a relationship when things are new and exciting (e.g. they’re having sex, going on fun dates, hanging out and getting to know each other), a woman might be more open to being with a guy who happens to smoke weed.
However, over time, she may also begin to notice that his excessive smoking makes him less charming, attentive and loving towards her than he could be.
Initially, she might be okay about that, but over time, she may begin to resent that he’s too busy lying on the couch stoned to pay her the attention she sometimes wants from him.
She may also find herself picking up after him and taking care of him because he’s too spaced out to do anything for himself.
Over time, she might begin thinking things like, “This isn’t a relationship anymore. Instead, it feels like I’m his mother or his maid. All I ever do is take care of him and pick up after him, while he spends his time smoking weed and watching TV or playing video games. I’ve had it. I feel so used by him. It’s just not fair for me. He’s taking me for granted.”
Initially, she might give her boyfriend hints about how unhappy she is and hope that he will then pick up on it and change.
Yet, if he continues to take her for granted and assumes that she’ll put up with it because she loves him so much, she will begin to feel resentful and will start disconnecting from her feelings of love for him.
If he doesn’t change, she will eventually break up with him and look for a replacement guy who can give her the love experience she wants in a relationship.
So, if smoking too much pot led to you taking your ex for granted, to get her back, you need to show her (via your attitude, actions and behavior) that you have learned from your mistakes and have become a better man as a result.
2 Mistakes to Avoid Making When Attempting to Get Your Ex Back
If you want to get your girlfriend back, it’s important that in every interaction you have with her from now on, you actively spark her sexual and romantic feelings for you.
To ensure that you do that correctly, you will need to avoid making the following mistakes:
1. Getting angry at her for not thinking the same way you do
There are many reasons why a guy might choose to smoke weed (e.g. he’s a very intense person and it helps him relax, it’s what his friends do and he likes to fit in with them, he uses it to help him cope with a medical condition, he likes to feel like a rebel, he feels as though it gives him access to deeper, more philosophically intelligent thoughts, he feels as though it makes his art form better, he enjoys seeing the world through the lens of being high on weed).
So, if his woman starts to nag him about it to the point where she breaks up with him, he might get angry with her for not being able to see things from his point of view.
For example: A guy might say to his girlfriend, “How can you be so closed minded about something that is legal now in many parts of the world? You knew that I smoked weed when we got together, but now you’re trying to change me and make me be someone I’m not. How can you not see that I smoke for my health/to relieve my stress/my music? Don’t you care about that? All you’re worried about is what you want, but you don’t care about what I want!”
Secretly, he may be hoping that his anger will shock her into realizing that she just needs to accept that he’s a heavy pot smoker and deal with it.
Unfortunately though, it almost never works out that way.
Instead, an emotional outburst like that usually only convinces a woman even more that her boyfriend is out of control.
She then feels more motivated to move on as quickly a possible and find a man who can offer her a more stable relationship and lifestyle that isn’t based on being intoxicated or high all the time.
The next mistake to avoid is…
2. Promising to quit weed for her
For example: A guy might say things like, “Please baby, don’t leave me. I promise that I will quit if you just give me one more chance. I won’t ever smoke again. I promise.”
Essentially, he’s likely hoping that if she sees that he’s willing to do anything to make her happy (i.e. stop smoking weed), she will be impressed and then open herself up to getting back together again.
In some cases (i.e. when a woman really loves her boyfriend and doesn’t want to leave him), a woman will give a guy a chance, but if he can’t stick to the promise, she will break up with him again.
In most cases though, when a woman has decided to break up with a guy, she has usually been thinking about it for quite a while and is ready to end the relationship and start trying to move on.
So, when a guy offers to quit weed for her, she actually loses more respect for him because he seems desperate because he’s willing to do whatever she wants.
Here’s the thing though…
A woman wants to be with a man that she can look up to and respect, not a guy that is so desperate to be with her that he submits to her and allows her to tell him what he can and cannot do in life.
So, if you want your ex to give you another chance, make sure she doesn’t look at the approach you’re taking to get her back as being one of desperation or panic.
Let her see that even though you want her back, you’re not going to allow her to force you into doing something you don’t want to do, but at the same time, you’re willing to meet her halfway and consider her feelings on the matter (e.g. cut down 80% right now and then eventually cut down completely and only smoke on special occasions a couple of times per year).
Do it for you though, not her.
If she senses that you’re only doing it for her because you’re in a panic now that she has dumped you, she will see it as desperate.
On the other hand, if she sees that you’ve significantly cut down on or have even quit weed because you want to do it and not because you’re in a panic after being dumped, then she will respect your emotional strength and maturity as a man.
You can then build on her feelings and get her back right then and there, or within days.