Reverse psychology is about making a person feel like you are telling them what to do, which then makes them want to do the opposite, to feel like they are in control or to spite you.
Yet, that usually results in you getting what you want anyway!
In the case of a guy texting an ex woman, he can use reverse psychology to get her back, or to at least make her open up to him again.
Here are 3 examples of how to use reverse psychology on your ex when you text her:
1. Immediately after she breaks up with you
Later that day or the morning after breaking up, you can send your ex a text like:
“Rebecca, I just want you to know that I accept the break up. You’re a great woman and deserve to be happy. So, I wish you all the best. Love, Peter.”
This immediately takes away any power that she may have hoped to gain over you by dumping you.
She sees that you’re not losing your mind and desperately chasing after her, which can make her want to show some interest in a relationship again to see if she can reel you back in.
For example: She might test you by saying something like, “Good. I’m glad you feel that way. We’re better off broken up. Let’s agree to never talk to each again, starting right now.”
She may secretly be hoping that by saying that, you will panic and admit to her that you didn’t mean you and her couldn’t talk again.
If you do that, she will then have the upper hand, so your attempt to use reverse psychology on her will have failed before it even started.
A good way to continue using reverse psychology on her is to respond with something like, “Lol…I’m not going to act like we are enemies just because we’ve broken up. So, I might say hello from time to time as a friend. Of course, you can ignore me if you want to. All the best.”
By saying that to her, you seem more emotionally mature than her and as though you are handling the break up better than she is.
She might then feel annoyed and want to prove to you that you’re wrong about her, so she plays into your hands by keeping the lines of communication open (e.g. she sends random texts to say hi, she calls you on the phone to see what you’re doing, or replies to your texts to not look childish or immature).
You can then use those interactions to your advantage and re-spark her feelings of respect and attraction for you.
A great way to make her feel attracted is to focus on making her laugh, smile and feel good to be interacting with you again.
No matter what she says or does to confuse you or upset you, just maintain your confidence and use humor to reverse the tables on her (i.e. make her feel confused and unsure of where she really stands with you).
That’s what women want anyway.
A woman wants to be constantly thinking about her relationship, rather than feeling bored by it because it’s so predictable.
The more your ex enjoys interacting with you, the more uncertain she’ll become about her decision to remain broken up.
She will then drop her guard and open up to giving you another chance.
Another example of a reverse psychology text for an ex is…
2. One week after the break up
If you’ve given your ex a week of space to calm down, it’s important that you then contact her and start the ex back process.
Remember: If you’re not interacting with her on the phone or in person, you can’t properly reactivate her feelings for you again.
Also, if you wait too long to meet up with her, she will have more time to get over you, meet someone else and move on.
So, a reverse psychology text to send your ex after a week might be something along the lines of, “Hey, how are you? I ran into (insert the name of an old girlfriend or someone your ex used to feel jealous about) yesterday and you’ll be happy to know that when I told her we split up, she said it was the best news she’s had in a while. So, don’t give me another chance! Let’s stay broken up. Enjoy your day.”
What will this do?
She will pick up on the fact that another woman (especially one she feels jealous about) is happy that you are now single.
She might also assume that you’re now interested in this other woman and will feel jealous and annoyed as a result.
She may then start thinking things like, “I bet she’s been waiting in the wings for me to break up with him so she can get her claws on him,” or “It drives me crazy to think that us splitting up is making her happy,” or “How can he even think about replacing me with a tramp like her?”
She then feels motivated to interact with you again (e.g. talk on the phone and especially see you in person), in the hopes of preventing you from hooking up with the other woman.
Of course, that’s exactly what you want.
You can then use that as an opportunity to spark her feelings of respect, attraction and love for you and get her back.
By the way…
Make sure you don’t get caught out in a lie though!
If she finds out that you were only using reverse psychology on her (i.e. to get her to interact with you again), she will likely cut you off completely and then getting her back will become a lot more difficult.
So, if you don’t have any other women in your life that you can use for this example, just text her a reverse psychology text like, “Don’t give me another chance” or, “Please keep ignoring me. It’s working! Lol…”
A text like that will confuse her and cause her to continually think about you and what you might mean by it.
As a result, she will be experiencing the feeling that women love the most; to be completely consumed by their relationship with a man.
Another example is…
3. One month after the break up
If you and your ex has been texting or calling each other, but she hasn’t been interested in meeting up yet, you can text her something like:
“Hey ex girlfriend. This break up is working out great. Life has been so much fun since. Let’s get together for a cup of coffee so I can tell you all about it.”
She will most likely respond with something like, “No. I don’t want to,” or “Leave me alone,” which is a great opening for you to then use even more reverse psychology on her.
In fact she may even ignore you altogether, but it doesn’t matter.
You can just respond by texting something along the lines of, “I had a bet going here at work that you’d ignore me or say something like that. I now know that you don’t want to see me again because you haven’t been having as much fun as me. You miss me don’t you? Admit it…lol. I don’t miss you.”
By this stage she will most likely be really annoyed with you and she may then text something along the lines of, “No, I don’t miss you. Just go away!”
If she has been missing you, she will start to feel hurt that you are happily and confidently moving on without her, which will make her feel drawn to you.
The only way to stop the pain she is feeling is to reel you back in and make you think that you have another chance with her, so she can then break up with you again.
So, she agrees to meet up.
Yet, this time around, you are going to be so much better at making her feel attracted to you that she’s not going to want to break up with you.
What she doesn’t realize now is that she is going to feel so damn good around you from now on.
She is going to feel drawn to you and completely consumed by her feelings for you.
When you make her feel that way, you can then regain the position of power in the relationship and enjoy the great times ahead with her.
3 Tips on What Not to Do
Make sure to avoid the following mistakes when using reverse psychology on your ex…
1. Sending her texts about good memories together when she doesn’t have feelings for you
Some guys assume that by bringing up good times they shared, a woman will suddenly realize her mistake and change her mind about breaking up.
She will think, “Oh yeahhhhh! I forgot! Things used to be good! I have to get back with him!”
Unfortunately, women aren’t that dumb.
Women can see right through BS and know that a guy is just trying to get her to focus on the good memories, so she forgets about all the reasons why she broke up with him.
She remembers exactly why she broke up with him and unless he changes those things about himself (e.g. stops being insecure, starts being more manly), then she isn’t going to feel attracted enough to want to be in a relationship with him.
Of course, most guys don’t realize that, so they make the classic mistake of sending good memory texts and hoping that it will work.
A guy might text something along the lines of, “Remember that time we went to the beach and we built that huge sandcastle? It was one of the best days of my life. We were so happy then. I miss those days. Do you?”
He’s secretly hoping she’ll respond with something like, “Yes, I do miss those days and I miss you too! Maybe this break up isn’t such a good idea after all. Why don’t we try again? Let’s get back together!”
Yet, even though that’s exactly what would happen in a romantic movie or book, in real life it rarely, if ever, turns out that way.
In the real world, a woman usually won’t look at a text message like that in a positive way, because she has dumped him and is turned off by him.
Instead, a woman will just roll her eyes and think something like, “He still doesn’t get it. I bet he thinks that by saying that to me, I’m going to suddenly forget about everything that went wrong in our relationship and go running back to him, just because we had some good times in the past. What he doesn’t realize is that by reminding me of all the good times, he’s actually highlighting to me how bad things turned out in the end. It just makes me even angrier with him for screwing everything up. Nothing has changed. Things used to be good, but that was a long time ago. He doesn’t even know how to make me want him again.”
Another mistake to avoid making is…
2. Accepting the break up, but then constantly texting her
If you say, “I accept the break up. I hope you’ll be happy. Bye,” make sure that you then back off and give your ex a few days of space so that things can cool down and she can start missing you.
If you don’t back off, she’ll assume (correctly) that you were only saying it to act like you don’t care.
She will see that you keep texting and trying to get her back, even though you said that you accepted the break up.
As a result, she will lose respect and attraction for you for trying to trick her into thinking that you are more confident and emotionally independent than you actually are.
So, be careful.
If you send her a text like, “I accept the break up. I hope you’ll be happy. Bye,” then make sure that you give her 3 to 7 days of space so she can believe you.
Then, contact her (preferably by calling her on the phone) and actively re-spark her feelings of respect and attraction for you and get her to agree to meet up with you in person.
At the meet up, build on her feelings of respect and attraction for you and guide her back into a relationship.
Another mistake to avoid making is…
3. Acting like a friend via text
Sometimes a guy is afraid that his ex woman will stop responding if he lets her know that he still has feelings for her and wants her back, so he makes the mistake of acting like a nice, sweet, platonic friend.
For example: He might text things like, “I just want to say hi and make sure that you’re okay.”
If she then responds with something along the lines of, “I’m great. I’m going on a date tonight,” just to test him, he may continue the charade by responding with something like, “Oh, that’s nice. I hope you have a good time.”
He’s hoping that by pretending to be her friend she will think, “Wow, he’s being such a sweet, reliable friend. He’s not even trying to get me back. How nice of him! I should give him another chance.”
Yet, it just doesn’t work that way.
Acting like a friend to your ex via text doesn’t create a spark of sexual and romantic attraction.
Instead, a woman will usually just enjoy having her ex stick around as a friend, while she hooks up with another guy and actively moves on.
So, if you want to get your ex back, don’t make the mistake of pretending to be her good friend who isn’t allowed to flirt with her and make her feel sexually attracted again.
Instead, use every interaction you have with her (via text and especially on the phone and in person) to actively make her feel respect and sexual attraction for you again.
Flirt with her, create sexual tension and make her feel like she will be losing out big time if she lets you go, rather than acting like you’re just her neutral friend now.