Here are 3 examples of what to say to your ex girlfriend to make her want you again:
1. Something funny to spark her attraction
Imagine that you’re talking to your ex girlfriend (e.g. over the phone or in person) and she says something along the lines of, “I just don’t feel the same way about you anymore. You need to accept that it’s over and move on.”
Instead of reacting by getting upset at her, walking away or even pleading with her to change her mind by saying things like, “Please don’t say that! I know we can still work things out. Just give me a chance to make things right!” and making her close herself off from you even more, just use it as an opportunity to spark her feelings for you by using humor to take away the seriousness of the situation.
For example: When your ex girlfriend says something like, “I just don’t feel the same way about you anymore. You need to accept that it’s over and move on,” you can respond by joking with her and saying something like, “What do you mean I need to move on? The reason I called you was to tell you that I got engaged last week.”
She might then say something along the lines of “Really?” or, “Are you serious?” and you can then laugh and say something like, “Yeah, absolutely! My bride is in the mail as we speak!” and have a laugh with her about that.
By approaching a potentially serious conversation in a funny way, she’s more likely to relax, smile, laugh and be more open to interacting with you again.
Using humor to get her laughing creates some positive feelings in her.
She then stops constantly thinking about everything that went wrong in the relationship that caused you and her to break up and starts thinking about how good she feels all of a sudden.
Then, even if she tries to fight it, she can’t stop herself from beginning to feel some respect for you again for having the confidence and the social skills to make her laugh and smile in a serious moment like that.
When she feels respect for you, she will also start to feel some sparks of attraction and when that happens, her guard comes down and she becomes open to interacting with you more and more to see where things go from there.
All you need to do then, is fully reactivate her feelings for you (i.e. by showing her via you conversation style, actions, behavior and the way you react to her when she tries to test you, that you’re a new and improved man) and get her back.
BTW: Don’t try to send her that example via text.
Texts are different.
Not everything you would say on a phone call or in person should be said via text.
Another example of the perfect thing to say to your ex girlfriend is…
2. Something mature to make her feel respect for you
After a break up, will usually be thinking about her ex in a negative way (e.g. he’s so annoying, insecure, jealous, needy or clingy).
To change whatever negative perception your ex has of you, it’s essential that you show her that you’ve already matured and become a better man since the break up.
This naturally makes her feel some respect and attraction for you again, but it’s not something you should present as, “Hey, I’ve changed all these things. Now do you like me?”
Just let her experience the changes in you as you talk to her and interact with her and she will naturally feel drawn to you again.
If you try to get her back by saying that you’ve changed and asking if it’s good enough to get another chance, a woman will almost always play harder to get or say, “No.”
Okay, so imagine that you’re talking to your ex and she is saying things like, “It’s really over between us. You stuffed things up between us and now I only want to move on and forget about you.”
As hurtful as that may be to you, don’t try to defend yourself or make excuses to hopefully get her to take pity on you, because it will only make her close up even more.
Instead, show her that you’re an emotionally strong, mature man by saying something along the lines of, “Hey, I totally get why you’re feeling this way. I messed up and you’re clearly at the point where you can only focus on the bad stuff that happened between us. I don’t blame you for feeling this way. If I were in your place, I’d want to move on and forget all that bad stuff too. However, I hope you can acknowledge that no one is perfect and that even though I made mistakes and you made mistakes too, that doesn’t mean we’re bad people or that we intentionally wanted to hurt each other. It simply means we stuffed up, or one of us stuffed up more than the other. We’ve learned from that, which already makes us better people. On my part, I accept full responsibility for my past mistakes. All I ask is that we try to be friends based on who we are now, rather than who we were in the relationship.”
By saying something like that to her, it calms things down and gets her thinking things like, “Wow, that was quite a mature thing for him to say. I never expected that from him. Instead, I thought he would beg and plead with me for another chance, or give me a whole bunch of excuses why he did what he did. I must admit, I respect him for being man enough to actually take responsibility for his mistakes. I wish he had been more like this when we were together. If he had, we probably wouldn’t be broken up now.”
That’s what you want her to be thinking.
When you make her feel some respect for you again, it causes her defenses to drop and she opens back up to you, even if just a little bit.
When that happens, just make sure that you continue saying and doing the types of things that will build on her feelings of respect and attraction for you and then confidently guide her back into a relationship with you.
Another example of the perfect thing to say to your ex girlfriend is…
3. Something funny and mature to make her feel sparks of love for you again
Start off by using some humor to lighten the tension between you and your ex.
For example: If you call her on the phone and she says something along the lines of, “What do you want? I don’t want to talk. I have nothing to say to you,” you can break the ice by saying in a playful way, something along the lines of, “No problem. I’ll do all the talking instead, Anyway… I got up at 6 a.m. I went to the bathroom and brushed my teeth. I then did 20 pushups and 20 sit ups. After that I was feeling a bit hungry, so I made myself a 6 egg omelet and some toast. Now I’m full and calling you to say hi. So, how are you? Oh, wait! I forgot… you don’t want to talk. Okay… so where was I?” and have a laugh about that with her.
Chances are, she will laugh at your goofiness and her guard will come naturally down.
She will no longer feel so tense about talking to you because she will see that there’s no need to be 100% serious and guarded.
That it’s okay for her to crack a smile and be a bit less uptight about things.
You’re not her enemy or some horrible guy who she can’t stand the sight of.
You’re the cool, good man that she once really loved or felt attracted to.
After saying something like that, you can then say, “Just kidding. Seriously though, I appreciate that you probably don’t want to talk at all. I mean, I now understand what I did wrong when we were together and I’m really sorry that I hurt you in the way I did. Of course, I don’t expect you to want to get back with me at all, but I just want you to know that I still care for you and I’d like us to be able to at least be friends, even if we never get back together again.”
By first making her laugh and smile and then showing her that you take full responsibility for your mistakes, she’s almost certainly going to open up to talking to you right then and there.
When she does, just focus on reactivating her feelings of respect and attraction for you by showing her that you’re a new and improved man now (e.g. more confident and self-assured, more emotionally mature, emotionally masculine, assertive and ballsy).
The more she experiences the new you, the more open she will become to meeting up with you in person and seeing where things go from there.
Then, when she feels attracted and respectful towards you again in person, getting back together will seem like a fun thing to do for her.
Common Problems Guys Experience When They Reach Out to an Ex Girlfriend
Getting an ex back is usually an easy thing to do, but guys can run into some of the following problems, which makes it a little more difficult initially…
1. She doesn’t seem excited when he contacts her
Even though you have examples of the perfect thing to say to your ex girlfriend now, it doesn’t mean she’s going to automatically respond to you in a positive way and immediately say, “Let’s get back together!”
Regardless of whether a woman currently hates her ex and doesn’t want anything to do with him, or if still in love with him and hoping they will get back together again, in most cases, she won’t act like she’s happy to hear from him when he contacts her.
Instead, she will likely pretend that she doesn’t want to talk to him, act cold, aloof and even bitchy towards him and generally make it very uncomfortable for him.
A woman will do that to see if you will maintain your confidence (which is attractive to her) regardless of how she’s treating you, or if you’ll become nervous, insecure and start doubting your attractiveness to her (which is unattractive to her).
So, make sure that no matter how she reacts, you remain confident and don’t start doubting yourself or your ability to get her back.
Instead, be confident and use humor to start rebuilding her feelings of respect and attraction for you, so she begins to feel open and drawn to you again.
Another problem that a guy might experience when he reaches out to his ex girlfriend is…
2. She takes her time to reply
It’s only natural that a guy might feel a bit tense if he calls or texts his ex girlfriend and she takes her time getting back to him.
He may begin thinking, “Texting her was a waste of time. I shouldn’t have sent her anything. I blew it by contacting her and now it’s too late. She’s just not interested anymore.”
Yet, thinking like that only causes him to lose confidence in himself and in his value to her.
He stops believing in his ability to re-attract her and gives up on the idea of getting her back.
When she finally replies, he’s put himself down so much that his lack of self-belief comes across in the way he texts her, or if they get on a phone call, it comes across in the tonality of his voice and the way he reacts and responds to her.
She then thinks to herself, “I should have just continued to ignore him. I see now that he still hasn’t changed and in fact, he seems to be even worse than he was before (i.e. more insecure, self-doubting). I made the right decision to break up with him and from now on, I’m just going to ignore him. I’ve got to move on.”
So, if you lose confidence and hope if your ex girlfriend takes too long to reply to you, you will end up turning her off even more and making it even more difficult to get her back.
Another problem you might experience is…
3. She doesn’t answer his calls
Sometimes a guy might only give himself one chance at calling his ex.
If she doesn’t answer, he then doesn’t follow up because he feels rejected or assumes that she isn’t interested.
He may then wait weeks or months in the hope that she will eventually contact him, only to completely lose her because she uses that time to move on.
Here’s the thing…
When a woman has disconnected from her feelings of respect, attraction and love for a guy, she’s won’t always make it easy for him to get her back immediately.
Instead, she might initially ignore his calls to see if he’s going to give up right away, or if he’s going to remain confident enough to keep trying.
Of course, that doesn’t mean a guy should call his ex non-stop until she picks up the phone.
Instead, it simply means you shouldn’t always give up at the first sign of resistance from her.
If you do give up too easily, you may end up losing her when you actually had a really good chance of getting her back.
Another problem that a guy might experience when he tries to talk to his ex girlfriend again is…
4. She loses interest in talking to him because he’s talking about the relationship before even re-attracting her
If you want to know the perfect thing to say to your ex girlfriend, just know that it’s definitely not about discussing the relationship or having a deep and meaningful conversation with her.
It’s all about attraction.
You have to be able to re-attract her to you sexually and romantically.
That is what makes her actually care about you again for her own reasons.
If you don’t properly re-attract your ex and make her feel some sparks of respect and attraction for you, hearing you talk about getting back together again may cause her say things like, “Forget about it. I don’t want to get back together in a relationship with you. We gave it a shot and it didn’t work out. It’s time that we just accept that we’re not right for each other and move on. Please just accept that and let me get on with my life.”
She then feels as though she is making the right decision to remain broken up with you.
That’s not the way to get a woman back.
If you want her to be interested in giving you another chance, you have to focus on making her have sexual and romantic feelings for you again.
When you do that, she automatically stops putting up walls every time you interact with her, which then allows her see the positive side of working on the relationship and giving you another chance.
Another problem you might experience is…
5. Being too neutral with her to the point where she doesn’t feel a spark
If you don’t actively make your ex feel attracted to you again (e.g. by using ballsy humor to make her laugh and smile when you interact with her, flirting with her to create some sexual tension, showing her by the way you respond and react to her that you’re a new man now), then it’s highly unlikely that she will suddenly start seeing you as the right man for her again.
So, don’t be neutral.
Be sexually attractive, not neutral.
Being neutral is being nice, friendly, passive and casual.
If you want her to want you back, you’ve got to step up your game.
Make her feel sparks of sexual attraction for you again, so she doesn’t just see you as a friend now.
If you fail to do that and she just sees you as a friend, she might decide to keep you around as a friend while she actively moves on behind your back.
So, if you don’t want your ex girlfriend to call you up one day and tell you that she’s in love with someone else now, make sure that you don’t waste your interactions with her by being too neutral or friendly.
Don’t give her the impression you’re not interested in getting her back anymore and just want to be a friendly, neutral ex now.
It’s fine to say that you and her friends, but just don’t act like a friend.
Another problem guys often experience is…
6. Being too nice to the point where he comes across as desperate and gives her a false sense of power over him
After a break up, a guy will sometimes make the mistake of being on his very best behavior around his ex girl (e.g. by being extra nice to her even when she is being bitchy towards him, letting her call the shots by doing whatever she wants to do, accepting all the blame for what happened between them, doing favors for her, offering to help her financially or with her life).
Essentially, he’s likely hoping that if she sees that he’s willing to do anything to make her happy, she will be impressed and then open herself up to giving him another chance.
Unfortunately though, in most cases, the opposite happens.
Here’s the thing…
A woman wants to be with a man that she can look up to and respect, not a guy that is submits to her and allows her to walk all over him, just so he can get to spend some time with her.
If you want your ex girlfriend to give you another chance, make she doesn’t look at your approach to her as being out of desperation.
Let her see that you are happy without her, but are also confident enough to interact with her and make her laugh and feel attracted to you again.
That is what brings down her guard and you can then get her back.