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How to Tell if a Woman Likes You
Women of all ages use subtle body language and hints in their conversation to show that they like you.
If you don't know how to tell if a woman likes you, many great opportunities with women will slip through your fingers. You'll also end up getting rejected by women who are clearly showing you that they aren't interested.
There are many signs to look for when trying to tell if a woman likes you or not.
How to Tell if a Woman Likes You: 3 Basic Signs
1. Her eye contact: Initial attraction between a man and a woman takes place when their eyes first meet. If she doesn't like you, a woman will usually avoid eye contact or won’t hold it when it happens.
If she holds eye contact with you for a few seconds and smiles in a shy, loving way or keeps trying to catch your eye contact, then she is definitely interested in you in a sexual way. You have to believe her when she tries to show her interest in you this way because most women will never directly say, "Hey, I like you - let's hook up." Instead, they will hint at it and wait to see if you have the confidence to move in for a kiss or organize a date.
2. Her body language: If you don’t know how to tell if a woman likes you, take a close look at her body language. Body language lets you know if you are getting a 'red light' or 'green light' from a woman. If she is crossing her legs, sitting with her breasts pointed towards you, touching and rubbing against you now and then, playing with her hair, showing more skin than usual, trying to draw attention to her lips, keeping her eyes focused on you and ignoring what else is happening around her, these are definite signs that she likes you.
3. Her style of conversation: If want to know how to tell if a woman likes you or not, pay attention to her style of conversation. If she seems absorbed in your conversation, asks you plenty of questions, laughs and jokes with you, then she is definitely interested in knowing you better. However, if her eyes are wandering around the room, focusing on others and putting you in the position where you have to try hard to get a response from her, then she probably isn’t interested.
These are great beginner techniques to begin your understanding of how to tell if a woman likes you. Next, you have to make sure you don't ruin her feelings for you, as explained in the next section.
Don't Get Desperate if She Doesn't Make it Obvious That She Wants to Have a Sexual Relationship With You
No matter how much she likes you initially, her feelings can change very quickly if you don't play your cards right. A lot of guys ruin a woman's feelings by behaving too keen or desperate to get somewhere with her. This only makes her play hard to get, so make sure you don't get carried away. While learning how to tell if a woman likes you, I recommend that you also learn how to make a woman like you so much that she tries to pick you up. This approach is much easier because it is then you who has the power and you can make her work harder to win your attention and affection. Have you ever noticed that the guys who try too hard to get women to like them often end up being rejected or being placed in the dreaded "friend zone"? Have you also noticed that the guys who are great with women look like they don't even care if they get the girl or not?
A lot of guys start to worry if they don't see obvious signs of interest from a woman. However, you need to relax and understand that there is a more complex game at play. For example: If you notice that she isn't using her body language to show a lot interest in you, it doesn’t mean that she doesn’t like you. She might be using more subtle body language to show her interest, because she is a shy-type.
How to Tell if a Woman Likes You: Advanced Techniques
Now that you know the basics of how to tell if a woman likes you, what should you do next? Chances are, you still need to know how to show your interest back to her effectively, as well as how to move in for a kiss without getting rejected or ruining your existing relationship. Flirting, getting her to laugh, listening to what she has to say and occasionally touching her during a conversation are great ways to show your interest in her.
First impressions are great, but to be successful you need to understand how to maintain a woman's interest and attraction long enough for something to happen. I'd like to teach you all of the steps right now. If you want to learn more, sign up here for free and I will e-mail you a link to a secret, free video series I've created to help you secure a relationship with this woman you like so much.
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By Dan Bacon, Founder of The Modern Man. Dan Bacon on Google+
(Personal photos with women)
the girl i love shows all the signs you mentioned,i went agead to ask her if she loves me and she said she would like us to continue as friends.why?
Hi George
Thanks for your question.
Yes, that’s what will happen almost EVERY time you tell a woman that you love her (or ask her if she loves you) BEFORE you’ve had sex. There is a natural flow to a human, sexual courtship and you are doing it incorrectly by talking about love before you’ve had sex.
Sign up here for free and I will send you free videos, free audio clips and free PDF reports that reveal the correct way to go from one stage to the next with a woman.
Cheers
Dan
What does it mean if you give a number at random and the girl you think likes you ask if you want that many children? Like you say 19 and she asks if you want 19 kids.
Hi Frank
Unless there is more of a back story to this situation, it doesn’t mean anything. She’s joking.
Cheers
Dan
I agree. She was probably just trying to come up with something funny to say.
I’m a woman, and HONESTLY, if I love the guy romantically, I WANT to hear him tell me, and I totally want to tell him, too (without having to sleep with him first). Actually, if he says it first, that just makes me 10 times happier. Now, if I love the guy as a friend/brother, I definitely want to tell him I love him, as long as I don’t think he’ll get confused and think I mean it in a romantic way. And if I have STRONG romantic feelings for the guy, possibly romantic love, but also have very strong feelings for another guy, I won’t be so quick to tell him I love him in that way; I want to be very careful before revealing my feelings for him, simply because I don’t want to hurt him in the long run–I want to make sure I’m ready to do right by him before hitting him with my feelings. And if I don’t feel close to the guy at all, I absolutely DO NOT want him telling me he loves me–it just makes me very uncomfortable, & it likely makes him a uncomfortable when I don’t say it back. I’d probably respond with, “What do you mean? We barely know each other.” But that’s just me. Other women may be different. I guess, on one hand, anytime you tell anyone you love them, you’re risking those feelings not being reciprocated–but the greater the risk, the greater the reward. On the other hand, when you really love someone, you love them without looking for anything in return. That way, if they return the feelings, great! If they don’t, you didn’t lose out on anything because you weren’t looking for them to give you anything in return in the first place. You express your love simply because you want to, not because you want something from them–That expression of love really can draw a woman closer to you.
Also, I find it a little irritating that you can’t smile, give a compliment to, or be nice to a guy without him thinking you want to hook-up with him.
Lol…this is so skewed towards you being comfortable and the guy having to risk everything.
If you really like the guy, you’ll be afraid to say you like him and you SAY that you’re doing that to protect HIM if you don’t end up treating him right. Yeah right! You’re doing that because you are behaving like the guys who are reading this article. You are talking about REALLY LIKING SOMEONE, but not knowing if they like you…just like these guys are. Except, while you tell the guys to confess their feelings in that situation, you say you wouldn’t do it if you were in that situation because you want to protect the guy. Lol…
As a general rule, men should not take dating advice from women, because it is always skewed towards the woman winning and if the guy ends up following the advice, most women are turned off by how nice and courteous he is.
Plain and simple guys: Escalate to a kiss (read this article: The Kissing Drug) and then sex. Then, if you don’t tell her your feelings, she will be eagerly wanting to know if you like her and aren’t just going to dump her after sex. When you tell her you DO like her, she will happy and excited and the loving relationship will begin. Do NOT talk about deep feelings prior to sex, unless she tells you that she has feelings for you FIRST.
Cheers
Dan
She said she love me but still have other men outside, how can i know if she trully like me to marry me
Hi Frank
Thanks for your question.
So, you want to marry a woman who says she loves you but still sleeps with other men? If you want to be another divorce statistic, go ahead! If you want your woman to respect you and have a committed relationship with you, sign up to my free newsletter to learn how.
Cheers
Dan
why women have more interest to be with bad guy instead of good guy.
Hi Paul
Thanks for your question.
The reason why women are more attracted to bad boys than nice guys: http://www.themodernman.com/nice_guys.html
Cheers
Dan
I’m22 and my step sister is 32 and she is a widow with two children she always share her problems with only me not even to her mom when she glance at me she smile she like staying with me she even show me her picures and give some do you think she loves me?
Hopefully she does love you–she’s your stepsister. There’s other fish in the sea, honey. Don’t even open that can of worms. Set some boundaries in that relationship. Just because a woman smiles, or winks, or whatever doesn’t mean you HAVE to pursue a relationship with her. Set some standards for yourself.
Nice one Tiffanie! Well said.
Cheers
Dan
So I met this woman via online dating last week we where talking through email for few days I then asked if she wanted to met and grab coffee. She said yes and I got her number. So last night we met for coffee, and we spent 5 hours talking and having a good time. When we were leaving I asked if she wanted to go out again and have dinner. She said she’d love to. Now I guess here’s my question is she interested in me or am I in the friend zone?
thanks for the tips,Dan!
but my lady shows half the signs ie
she keeps eye contact but does not try to catch it.
she laughs at my stupidest of all jokes
body language-she does not concentrate much on looks(though she is cute) and yes,she crosses her legs while talking to me.she is a cool and settled person,and is seldom angry.
but there are rumors that she’s committed.
please tell me what do her signs mean.
Dude! Ask her! If she’s as cool as you say she is, she’ll be cool about it. I’m just saying, a lot guys let great girls slip through their fingers because they’re just trying to “read the signs” and they’re reading them all wrong. Just talk to her about whatever’s on your mind (in as respectful way). Haven’t you figured it out by now. Woman LOVE when guys talk to them about this stuff. We want to know what you’re thinking just as much as you want to know we’re thinking. We’re the ones who have to worry about saying too much to you, not the other way around. And if she’s is interested in you but is already in a relationship, she’ll let you down in a way that won’t embarrass you.
Lol…
This is another example of why guys should NOT take dating advice from a woman.
“Mr.X” Do NOT ask her if she likes you. Be the man and escalate to touching and kissing confidently and respectfully. Have sex and the relationship will then begin. However, if you ask her if she likes you or if she wants to have a relationship, most modern women will reject you because they expect men to be savvier than that.
Cheers
Dan
i have meet girl and ifall in love she have relationshep with some other guy before and now so how to atract this girl to me
Leave her alone. If you can make her leave her guy for you, someone else can probably make her leave you for them. IF you want, you can candidly tell let her know that if doesn’t work out between her and her guy, to let you know.
there is a woman in our dance class that i patner with everytime we have our classes. She danced passionately with me.
whenever i text her, she replied back. we exchange messages several times within a day.
does this mean she likes me?
Hi Nolan
Thanks for your question.
Wow, your comment suddenly reminded me of how clueless I used to be when it came to assessing a woman’s interest in me. It’s obvious that you don’t understand attraction, how a woman will show interest and the steps you need to go through to naturally escalate to a sexual relationship. You really need to watch this video and then read the book: http://www.themodernman.com/videos/the-flow-new-edition.html Your current approach to success with women is about hoping to be chosen by the girl. That’s not how to have choice in your dating life and will only ever result in you getting lucky with random women, rather that YOUR CHOICE of women. Read: Is Getting Lucky the Answer to Success With Women? (Make sure you read the article. It will change your life and save you from a LOT of pain, heartache and rejection now and in the long run).
Cheers
Dan
I have this beautiful neighboor, last week her kids and my kids all played basketball. Her and I had a few drinks. Than she started talking about how her boyfriend. Treats her and that he is cheating on her. I’married, not happily married, but married. And I’m very attracted to her. We like each other. She shows me all the signs I need to know that she’s interested in me. We have hugged, and she has given me a big cheek kiss. I don’t know what to do. We talked earlier this evening and kinda told each how we felt for one another. But I think I’m going to stay away because I don’t want to cause any problems.
Save your marriage. The grass is always greener on the other side. Besides, if the lady keeps talking about her boyfriend, he’s still going to be in her system if and when they break up. Then she’ll just be talking about her “ex-boyfriend”, even if you and she start a relationship. You’ll get tired of it.
i am a 52 year old divorced man with a 52 year old girlfriend but i have this attractive 32 year old recently divorced coworker who is always smiling at me and laughing at my sense of humor. lately she is going to employee evening get togethers saying she would only go if i was going too. she is also sending me texts with big smile and wink smiley faces. i just dont know if she is interested or just being friendly because i am 20 years older how can i find out without blowing it with her thx matt
Hi Matt
Thanks for your question.
This is a tricky one because if it backfires, you have to live with the fallout day in, day out. That’s why we don’t recommend using the workplace as a place to pick up women. The only exception is if you meet a woman who is perfect for you and you are intending on having a serious, long term relationship. Read this: http://www.themodernman.com/dating/relationships/dating_women_in_the_workplace.html You can use the techniques I suggest in this video: http://www.themodernman.com/videos/question-and-answer-video-series-part-3.html for getting her over to your place.
Cheers
Dan
Hi, I met this women on a date site 4 years ago than we met up again later. We finally met and we are chatting and she is sending me photos. She is a pain in the butt challenge. We did have sex on the first day but she took blame cause I didn’t force it. We text. And I’m wondering cause we are both stubborn she knows I like her a lot too. She hits on me or flirts but isn’t ready for the dating stage. Does this mean that’s she’s interested or keeping her window options open?
Hi James
Thanks for your questions.
You shouldn’t allow the woman to be in control like that. You call the shots, you decide when things happen. How? You’ve got to get the girl chasing you, no matter how stubborn she is. If you let a woman play her using “dating games” she will usually bowl you right over. Take control. I recommend you watch Better Than a Bad Boy and learn how to be the type of guy that women desperately chase after.
Cheers
Dan
hi am abi i love one female and am asking 2 be my friend but she did not accepted after we spent more than 2 years.but still when am asking 2 be meet she always says ok so reality she loves me or not pls say sth
.
Hi Abi
You don’t understand women. If you want a girl to be your girlfriend and have sex with you, you don’t ask her to be your friend. Read The Flow and learn the right way to talk to a woman you’re attracted to.
Cheers
Dan
First or all, if you want her to be more than your friend, you have to ask her to be more than your friend. But I have the feeling she told you exactly what she wanted or didn’t want with you but you won’t listen. Respect her yes or no.
Hi Tiffanie
You’ve made some fairly good comments on this page, thanks. However, this comment on yours (and a few others that I’ve deleted instead of approving) is a perfect example of why men should NOT take dating advice from a woman.
A woman will say, “Tell her that you want more than friends” because that’s how SHE would like it to happen with a guy that SHE wants to be more than friends with. Why? Usually because she’s afraid of being rejected by the guy who probably isn’t that into her in “that way.” However, if a guy that she is NOT sexually attracted to asks her if she wants to be more than just friends, she will say, “No, I don’t want to ruin our friendship” because that’s ALL she sees it as.
A guy should NOT ask the woman, he should take this approach with her and NOTHING else. Kiss her or get lost: http://www.themodernman.com/dating/the-kissing-drug.html
Cheers
Dan
I hear you, Dan
All I’m saying here is that the guy should stop wasting both their time trying to be “friends” when he really wants to be more than friends. He’s either going to be dissapointed that he invested so much time into being friends when she doesn’t want more, or he’s going to realize that he could’ve been her “man” sooner if he had he taken a more direct approach. And the thing is, after the girl tells the guy she’s not interested, he’s still convinced that if he stays her “friend” a little longer, she’ll change her mind. It doesn’t work.
Well said Tiffanie.
Cheers
Dan
This girl keeps touching me and talking to me? Should I ask her out?
Hi Paul
Lol…gee, thanks for all the information on the situation! Dude, what do you think I am – a mind reader?
For all I know, she could be your office manager and she’s touching you on your shoulder when she comes to your desk to see if you’ve been working well.
If it’s a girl who is hitting on you, do this: http://www.themodernman.com/dating/the-kissing-drug.html
…oh, and no – you don’t ask girls out. That happens in the movies and when you are 13. Grown ups kiss and then escalate to sex and a relationship without having to talk about it.
Cheers
Dan
hi..i known this girl(actually were church mates) since high school but not that close enough to be called as friend..in my college times till now..she’s always telling me she loves me even in front of so many young people in our church, telling me to sit beside her, trying to piss me off, then laugh at me, but there is one guy in our church that she says she consider it at her bestfriend, and this is where my problem starts, cause i dont really beleive that they’re just bestfriends cause that girl also does to that guy or more than what she’s doing to me..and my question is, does this girl like me or she only wants to be surrounded by many guys..to be more precise this girl is the only child of her parents, and maybe shes only used to be the center of attraction..really needs your help..im xion from philippines XD
Hi Xion
The answer is simple: http://www.themodernman.com/dating/the-kissing-drug.html
Cheers
Dan
she always look at me in a way dat i think she want me to tell her something n i dont know how to tel her dat i love her
Hi Odumumsor
You’ve clearly got no idea about how to successfully attract a woman. Watch this video
Cheers
Dan
Ok so I’ve dated this girl before…we moved on but she would randomly text me to see how i was…then she wanted to go to the movies but called it a non date…i don’t know im confused cause we have a great time together…should i move on…she will put her arm on me and i think she likes me …of course i had to ask her what her deal was and that i don’t do friends…but then told her i was willing to do just friends…i guess cause i do like her…please help…
Hi Mike
Lol…mate, you need to kiss her. Read: The Kissing Drug
Additionally, it is YOU as the man who makes the rules, not the woman. She follows you, not the other way around. If you treat a woman like she is the boss, you’ll get nowhere with most women and will be used by some women.
Cheers
Dan
Hey Dan,
First off I’m a huge fan, I think you give wonderful advice. Secondly I have a Co-Worker who I’ve had feelings for for quite sometime. I have told other coworkers about my feelings towards her and over time they have told me that they believe she likes me. Initially when we first started talking, her shift would end and she would spend time with me in the break room we’d talk for 30 minutes at a time until my break was over and then she’d leave. Also, after her shift would be over she would come to my department and pretty much put a jacket over her uniform and hang out. In fact, she stayed an hour after her shift was over just to talk to me and hang out. Near Christmas, she asked me to help her load an item she had just bought from the store into her car, we had a store full of co-workers yet she came all the way to my department to ask me. Here’s the twist, I gave her a gift for Christmas and she freaked it and not in a good way, she asked me why I got it for her? And I hesitated and said ‘because we are close’ and didnt tell her I liked her. A week later I find out she’s still has feelings for her ex and refers to him as her best friend, yet she still shows all of these signs to me as well. Infact a lot of my male coworkers come to me and tell me they can tell she likes me. How should I approach this situation? And does she truly like me? Thanks a bunch Dan!
Hi Kirk
Thanks for your question and positive feedback.
It sounds like she is woman #2 in this article: Is She Hitting on You or Just Being Friendly? It also seems like you are doing what the guys in this article do: Is Getting Lucky the Answer to Success With Women? and suffering the consequences as a result.
For the record: I also want to point out that I cannot see any record of a product purchase from you. You mention I give wonderful advice, but it seems you’ve only been learning from the free articles. I just want to point that out to others because if you had at least read The Flow, you wouldn’t be asking me this question – you’d be posting a success story about you and this woman being in a loving, sexual relationship.
Cheers
Dan
Hello i love a girl and we are having a relationship going on but whenever i say i luv u she never replies back and gives d reason dat she is at home but earlier she used 2 say it bt i dnt knw wht 2 do it hurts me a lot and she always chat with her new friends but never txt me a single msg and every time she talks about an actos dat she have crush and she luvs him more what 2 i hurts me alot bt i never got angry on her or scolded her because she wuld get upset
Hi Sylvester
Thanks for your comment.
You are experiencing that problem because you’re making the mistake I explain in this article: Who Should Wear the Pants in a Relationship? Whatever you do, don’t begin making this mistake: Is She Still in Love With You?
Cheers
Dan
Hello dan i want your opinion.
These days many students we study in the university library, we are about 1500 students there. So as you can imagine there are a lot of girls there. My problem is that i don’t know how to approach a girl without understanding me that i like her. I mean when i’m sitting in a desk, and the girl i like is on an other, i can’t just go and talk to her, even if i’ll ask her something general, like i want her opinion for something or something like that. she will wonder why i asked her while there are so many people there, so she will again think that i like her. And as i know it’s not good to show that you like a girl who is very very beuatiful, as she’s going to reject you. In the case that i know that a girl likes me, by looking me all the time etc.. Then do i have to go and talk to her immediately? or do something else?
Hi John
Lol…stop pretending that you don’t like girls. If you do that, you’re living a lie and people can see it.
One of the fundamental principles we teach here at The Modern Man is to BE REAL. You never have to lie to a woman or pretend. Be real, women respect that and WANT that from a guy.
Cheers
Dan
How do you let a co worker know you like her without putting your job at risk
Hi Steve
Thanks for your question.
You don’t tell a woman you like her. You flirt and if she flirts back, she is interested. I recommend you listen to The Ultimate Guide to Conversation and learn how to flirt and talk to women in a way that naturally, easily and quickly leads to love and sex.
Cheers
Dan
How do i get a good girl, that does not Party, drink or smoke because i don’t, it happens that i land on bad girls that like me back but i do not like them back, pliz help
Hi Delick
Thanks for your question.
We provide 21 different ways to meet women in this program: 21 Great Ways to Get a Girlfriend. You’ll learn how to meet ALL kinds of women. If you sign up to our newsletter, you will get free previews of that program and will learn about how to meet women who meet your exact criteria.
Cheers
Dan
hi Dan
I work with a women I have started having feeling for but I am not sure if she feels the same way , if I ask her out and she says no I could loss my job ,I have tried to ask her out before because I thought she was hinting at wanting to do something but she just went quiet and didn’t answer, but then after about 10 mins she started asking what do I look for in a women , and when I told her ,and she has this quality she looked and smiled at me, also she makes jokes about me liking other members of staff that she knows I don’t like,
A couple of months ago she phoned me from work but on her mobile to ask me something work related, so about 2 weeks after I text her and we had a general conversation it wasn’t 1 word answers but then she just stopped messaging and when I seen her in work the next day she said she couldn’t stop laughing at what I text her , this seems to be how it goes I will text her first we will txt for about 1 hour then she will just stop texting,
was just wondering if you could help with some advice , thank you
Hi Daz
Thanks for your question.
Basically, you’re the type of guy who is afraid to approach and meet women. You’re lonely, you’re feeling desperate and you’re trying to get a woman in the easiest way possible…even though she doesn’t like you that much.
…and guess what?
She knows that. Women can tell if a guy is afraid of walking up to women he finds attractive and talking to them. It is written all over your body language and easily perceptible when observing your behavior around other women. You have a few interactions with a woman you work with and then start fantasizing at night about being in a relationship with her, while she is probably sleeping with a guy who had the guts to approach her and escalate to kissing and sex. All you have is a few texts and phone calls, while he gets to have sex with her.
If you want my advice, here it is: Learn how to make her feel sexual attraction for you. Do NOT ask her out. That is NOT the way to go through a natural, sexual courtship with a woman. Sure, you might see that happen in the movies, but guess what? Movies are ENTERTAINMENT, not EDUCATION. Sure, some movies give people some interesting realizations, but the purpose of movies, TV sitcoms, etc is to ENTERTAIN both male and female audiences. The approach you’re using is like something out of a teenage TV sitcom.
If you want to get a real education on how to go through the flow of a natural, sexual courtship with a woman, read The Flow.
Cheers
Dan
Hi dan, at work this random stranger girl I attended ( I work at the airport at a ticket counter) after I checked in her bags and printed her ticket, I told her and her friend to have a good day and after she randomly asked me “do you want another job?” I stood clueless to the question and said back to her ” no I’m ok thank you ” and after she smiled at me staring at me and afterward her and her friend giggled and they walked away. Till this day I am very confused of what that means, please help me out .
Hi Noel
Thanks for question.
Sorry, I don’t do mind reading!
Mate, you should have just asked her, “…and what would that job involve?” She was likely hinting at you being her boyfriend, who knows. Stuff like this doesn’t matter Noel. What matters is what YOU do in the moment, not the woman. If you want to learn how to be a man who takes action when a moment like that is presented to him, watch Alpha Male Power: http://store.themodernman.com/in/d2e92f
Cheers
Dan
Hi
I would like to know if there is a possibility that I could be with this one. Women that I had a crush on. Its been 8 months since I’ve known this women. Things we great between us. I often told her that I fell inlove with her she would give me that shy look. But for the past month she didn’t want to speak to me. She said she doesn’t want a bf. She wouldn’t tell me why. So I should often get angry with her and just say some silly things to her getting her upset! Instead of telling her good morning I used to say things like I think u better off without me. And eventually she just cut of all conection with me. I wanted to write a letter of apology to her. What do you think I could do to get her back. Please help
Hey Kevin
Thanks for your question.
Honestly, I laughed when I read this because the answer is so simple. You did The Flow backwards. Your attempt at a sexual courtship was backwards and that’s why it backfired. Read The Flow and start the courtship again with her properly: http://store.themodernman.com/in/58e9e6c
Cheers
Dan
can a woman still like a without smiling, but catching staring but it was without expression and then another incident i could feel her breast on my thigh, but they were no excuse it was an accident, even thought i fake i like didn’t like
what she sending me a meassage
Hi Brian
Thanks for your question.
It doesn’t matter what a woman does. What matters is what YOU do. You are the man, not her. You need to take the lead and make something happen. You need to flirt and see if she flirts back. If you don’t know how to go through the process of a natural, sexual courtship, read this: http://store.themodernman.com/in/58e9e6c
Cheers
Dan