Toxic friends: Untrustworthy friends are not friends

Toxic friends: Untrustworthy friends are not actually 'friends'

Toxic friends are those who continually have a negative effect on your life. While some of them can add some value to your life, they usually end up causing you more problems and misery than they’re worth.

What makes many toxic people so difficult to recognize is that they're often quite funny, charming or cool when you first meet them. That's how they manage to weave their way into your life, so that when their true personality traits finally reveal themselves, you're more likely to make excuses for them, cut them some extra slack or want the friendship to succeed despite their faults.

These people should be avoided at all costs and you should never hang on to a toxic friendship in fear of feeling a little lonely without him or her in your life. Even one great friend will bring more happiness into your life than ten toxic friends could. So, here are the 10 types of toxic friends that you should avoid.

10. The 'Wet Blanket' Friend
No matter what great thing has happened to you, this toxic friend will always point out the downside. Got a promotion? He'll tell you how much more work and pressure you'll now have. Entered a new relationship? This toxic friend will remind you of your past romantic failures and why this one is just as likely to end badly. Bought a new car? He'll research the statistics on why the car you purchased was a poor choice. In short, no matter what happy event lights up a positive fire in your life, he'll be the wet blanket that puts it out.

9. The "I Can Top That!" Friend
Whether a crisis has come your way, you've achieved something great or something funny happened to you, the "I can top that!" toxic friend will invariably jump in with something that happened to him that was either worse, better or funnier – at least in his mind.


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8. The ‘Steal Your Girlfriend’ Friend
No matter how in love you are with your girlfriend, this toxic type of friend will gladly give up your friendship to hook up with your lady. Guys like this are usually pretty desperate and insecure and will hardly, if ever, approach a woman that they don’t know to talk to her. They’d rather steal what you have instead of confronting their fears of approaching women.

If you tell him to stop hitting on your girl, he’ll tell you that you shouldn’t be so insecure. He’ll try to explain that if your girlfriend really wanted to be with you, she wouldn’t be interested in him.

The right type of friend in this situation is a guy who knows that he should act like a friend to your girlfriend, instead of trying to attract her. ‘Friends’ who try to attract and pick up your girlfriend are simply not cool enough to be your friend. Explain your concerns. If they change, keep them as a friend. If they don’t, ditch them without a second thought. Friendship is nothing without loyalty.

7. The "Why Does It Always Happen to Me?" Friend
Everyone goes through bad patches in their life and you should be there for a friend when needed. However, when a toxic friend's life is always full of some type of drama – usually of his own making – then it's time to put an end to the friendship or at least keep it at a distance until he/she finds someone else to complain to. If you want to be happy, you need to have positive friends in your life that will inspire you and help you to achieve your goals and not people who sap all of your energy and time with their problems.

6. The 'Moocher' Friend
A moocher is someone who always seems to want something from you and never gives you anything in return.

This friend might not directly ask you for money but he always conveniently forgets his wallet, never picks up a bill, complains if he pays a little more than you on a bill, constantly raids your refrigerator or always expects you to provide him with some form of 'hospitality' (food, booze, a place to party or a couch to sleep on). This toxic friend is simply a deadbeat who will drain more than your wallet. These are usually not the type of friends you can count of in a time of need, so don’t be afraid to move away from this ‘friendship.'

5. The 'Never Your Wingman' Friend
Whenever you and this toxic friend go out to meet women, he's always the one who hits on the hot chick and expects you to chat up her fat, homely friend while he gets the babe's phone number. Being someone's wingman and distracting the unattractive friend is a two-way street. A real friend will take turns hooking up with the hotties and distracting their plain pals.

4. The ‘Malicious’ Friend
Guys enjoy taking verbal jabs at each other in a playful way. This type of communication – called ‘ribbing’ - is generally a harmless form of communication that actually helps friends bond together. However, when you have a toxic friend who crosses the line between being funny and being nasty and malicious towards you, you have to call him on it. Let him know that while you enjoy joking around about stuff, ribbing is not meant to turn into a serious, personal attack on someone.

Unless he changes his behavior towards you, feel free to ditch him and don’t look back. He’ll only try to bring you down and no one needs that in their life.

3. The 'It's All About Me' Friend
When you speak to this type of toxic friend the conversation always revolves around him. His only interest in you goes something like this – "Well enough about me. Let's talk about you. What do you think of me?" While that might sound amusing, it's also too true. Whatever is happening in his life is much more important than what's happening in yours.

Every time you go out together you can be sure that you'll only see the movies he wants to see, you'll eat only in restaurants he likes, or only watch the teams he's rooting for. And if he should ask you to make the occasional decision, you can be sure he'll remind you often how nice it was of him to do that.

There is really no value in having friends like those in your life. Feel free to keep them as acquaintances, but we recommend only being great friends with people who actually care about you.

2. The 'Now You See Him, Now You Don't' Friend
This guy is only around when it suits him. If he has someone he thinks would be more interesting or more fun to hang around with, he'll disappear from your life.
Or, if you make plans to do something together, he’ll either not show up or he'll cancel at the last minute without a good reason.

You may go for weeks or months without seeing this toxic friend or hearing from him. He won't return your phone calls and you'll think he's vanished. And when he reappears (usually because his other ‘friends’ got wise to his toxicity and no longer want to hang out with him) he'll tell you all about the wonderful adventures he had when he was out of touch. And if you ask him why he didn't ask you to join him and his friends, he'll say, "It slipped my mind."

This type of ‘friend’ doesn’t really care about you and is better kept as a casual acquaintance until he becomes a better man and deserves more of your time.

1. The 'Blabbermouth' Friend
Your first indication of trouble with this buddy is that he's always talking about your other friends behind their back. He loves to gossip, talk about other people’s relationships and shares what he thinks they're all doing wrong in their lives. He repeats things that he was obviously told in secret ("Listen, I told John I wouldn't tell anyone about this, but I'm sure he wouldn't mind you knowing.").

If you think that you'd never be the target of his type of disloyalty, think again. The minute you're out of sight, you can be sure he's telling anyone who'll listen about anything you've shared with him and what his true opinion of you actually is.

The only antidote for getting these types of human poison out of your life is to avoid all contact as soon as you diagnose your toxic friendship. Find more real friends and your life will become happier than you could ever imagine.