Okay, so you begged your ex girlfriend to take you back and now she’s ignoring you.
Don’t worry; you can recover from that.
You’ve just got to let her see that you’ve learned from the experience of begging for another chance and understand that it would have been a real turn off for her to see you behaving like that.
For example: You can say something along the lines of, “Hey, I know I stuffed up. I got so upset over the idea of losing you that I reacted like an immature child. I get that now. I understand why my behavior would make you feel like you don’t want to be around me anymore – I mean who wants to hang out with a wimpy, needy guy, right? However, something I’d like you to understand is that neither one of us is perfect. Yes, I reacted badly, but that’s over now. I made a mistake, but I’ve learned from it and moved on from there. I’m not that guy anymore. We all learn from our mistakes and become better people as a result. I don’t expect you to take my word for it and believe that I have fully changed, but if we can just try to be friends for now, I’ll prove it to you via my actions. You will see for yourself that I really have changed. I’m not asking you to take me back at all. Instead, I’m just that we stay civil with each other and remain open to saying hello every now and again.”
If she continues to complain about the fact that you begged and how much it turned her off, just use some humor to get her laughing and to get rid of the seriousness of the conversation, “Oh well, so I begged for another chance. At least I didn’t get down on my knees and beg. I was still a respectful beggar. I was a standing beggar. That’s much cooler than begging on your knees. I was a pretty damn cool beggar” and then have a laugh with her about it.
The point of using humor is to get rid of the seriousness of the situation and make her feel attracted to your ability to make her laugh when she is being so closed off to you.
Women are naturally attracted to guys who can do that, so a small spark of attraction will be created between you and her at that moment.
Even if she tells herself, “Don’t let him make you laugh and feel good. He’s trying to make you change your mind about him and give him another chance,” she just can’t stop herself from beginning to feel some respect for you again for having the balls to admit your mistake and then get her laughing and smiling when she was being cold, bitchy and closed off towards you.
By the way…
Only saying that to your ex girlfriend isn’t the magic solution to convincing her to come running back into your arms.
It’s simply the first step in showing her that you have realized your mistake and have already begun to change and improve as a man, which then makes it easier for her to reconnect to her feelings of respect and attraction for you.
You essentially open the door to getting back together.
Then, from that point onwards, you need to continue re-sparking her feelings of respect and attraction for you, by displaying some of the traits and behaviors that are naturally attractive to women (e.g. maturity, confidence, emotional strength).
You can make her feel attracted to you again based on how you talk to her, react to her and think, feel, behave and act.
Whether you’re sending her a text, e-mail, messaging her on social media, calling her on the phone, or meeting up with her in person, you have to keep showing her that you’re not longer that guy who begged her to take him back.
You are a more emotionally strong, emotionally mature and emotionally attractive man now and it would be a mistake for her to not give you another chance.
Don’t tell her that; show it to her.
Where Guys Go Wrong When Their Ex Girl is Ignoring Them
Sometimes, a guy might ask himself, “Okay, so I begged my ex girlfriend to take me back and now she’s ignoring me, so what do I do now? Should I ignore her too? Should I send her texts to remind her of the good times? Should I apologize in a letter or e-mail?”
There are so many optional ways of trying to get an ex back, but most of them don’t work.
You have to do this right.
You have to make sure that you don’t make these kinds of mistakes.
If you do, you have to stop making those mistakes and start doing the right things immediately.
The first mistake that a guy might make while his ex girl is ignoring him is…
1. Not improving his ability to attract her before he next interacts with her.
One of the main reasons why a woman breaks up with a guy is because she has lost a lot of respect and attraction for him over time and he eventually becomes too much of a turn off for her to justify remaining in a relationship with him.
- He becomes emotionally insecure in the relationship with her and starts being clingy and needy (e.g. needing her to reassure him of her love and attraction for him, telling her that he couldn’t cope or live without her support).
- He allows her to dominate him with her confident personality and ends up being a wimpy, pushover guy that she just can’t feel attracted to anymore.
- He crumbles when faced with challenges in his life.
- He stops making her feel feminine and girly in his presence and treats her more like a neutral friend, or a big sister.
- He stops making her feel safe and protected because he has no real purpose and direction in his life.
Here’s the thing…
Even when a guy behaves in some of these unattractive ways, most women will stick around in the relationship for a while in the hopes that he will change.
To speed up the process of change, she will begin to drop hints, make suggestions and sometimes even have arguments with him over seemingly insignificant things, as a way of letting him know that she’s not happy.
If he fails to pick up on her clues, or simply assumes that she’ll stick with him even if he doesn’t change, she will start thinking, “I have no future with this guy. He’s stuck in a rut in his life and making the same mistakes over and over again. He doesn’t even know what he’s doing wrong, so he won’t be able to change. I need to get out of here and find a guy who knows how to be a man. I am sick of waiting for him to be the man that I need.”
Then, when she decides to break up with him and he reacts by begging and pleading with her to take him back, she might think, “Hhhh…he still doesn’t get it. He’s making the same mistakes and hoping that things between us will somehow change by magic. I’ve made the right decision in breaking up with him because he clearly doesn’t get it and isn’t even trying to learn and become the man that I need,” and she then simply cuts him out of her life and just ignores him.
So, if you want your ex girlfriend to stop ignoring you and open herself up to the idea of taking you back, you have to make sure that you’ve improved your ability to attract her (i.e. by improving on the things that caused her to break up with you in the first place) before you interact with her.
If you attempt to get her to take you back without first giving her what she wants from you, she will simply keep ignoring you and pushing you away.
For example: If a guy got broken up with because he was too insecure, self-doubting and needy in the relationship, he needs to show his ex girlfriend that he’s now more confident and emotionally mature than before.
Another example is if a guy got broken up with because he was too timid in the relationship and allowed his ex to dominate him and push him around.
In that case, he needs to show her, via his actions, behavior and the way he responds to her, that he’s now emotionally strong and can stand up for himself, regardless of how badly he wants her back.
Of course, that doesn’t mean that he must be rude or overly domineering, controlling and bossy.
It simply means that he is now being emotionally strong and takes on the role of leading the way to a better relationship for him and her, rather than being so timid, hesitant and self-doubting.
2. Discussing his “feelings” with her when she has lost respect and attraction for him.
When a guy makes the mistake of begging his ex girlfriend to take him back, he might think that if he explains his reasons why and tells her how much she means to him, she will forgive him.
He might then say to her, “I know you’re mad at me for behaving the way I did, but you have to understand that I only reacted that way because I care about you so much. I just couldn’t accept that what we had together is over. Please don’t throw our love away. I can’t stand the thought of living without you. Just give me a chance to show you that I can be the guy you want me to be.”
Yet, here’s the thing…
A woman doesn’t care how much a guy cares for her if she has lost respect and attraction for him.
Even though he wants her to see how much he really cares for her, she’s usually not going to care that much because she simply doesn’t have feelings for him anymore.
It annoys her that he wants to talk about his “feelings” for her when she doesn’t even have feelings for him.
She may then say things like, “You’re so selfish” and, “All you care about is yourself,” and that will really confuse him because from his perspective, all he cares about is her and getting her back.
Yet, what he doesn’t realize is that she just isn’t going to care about what he is feeling, until he can start making her feel what she wants to feel.
Nothing about his actions are showing her that he’s changed anything about himself since the break up.
He’s just going on and on about his feelings, but he’s not triggering her feelings for him.
So, if you want your ex girlfriend to take you back, don’t waste time discussing your feelings because if she’s not feeling a lot of respect and attraction for you right now, it’s just not going to matter to her.
What will change her mind about you is if you re-spark her feelings of respect and attraction for you by making her feel some respect, attraction and love again.
Then, she can’t stop herself from feeling drawn to you and wanting to interact with you more and more.
3. Thinking that being extra nice to her will help.
Sometimes, a guy will think that that if he’s extra nice to his ex girlfriend, it make her feel so guilty for breaking up with him that she will just have to give him another chance.
He might decide to do whatever she wants him to do, make himself available to her 24/7, help her with her housework (or homework), run errands for her and possibly even pay her bills.
Yet, here’s the thing…
Even though a woman might really appreciate that her ex is being so nice and doing all those great things for her, it’s not the thing that’s going to make her change her mind about him. Why?
Niceness doesn’t make a woman feel turned on and aroused.
Women only see niceness as charming and sexy when it’s coming from a confident guy who makes her feel respect and attraction in other ways.
If a woman doesn’t feel respect and attraction for her ex and he’s being super nice to her, she’s going to see right through it.
She will know that he’s just trying to suck up to her because he has no idea how to make her feel sexually attracted, aroused and respectful towards him.
Rather than thinking, “Maybe I should just get back together with him seeing as he’s being so nice,” a woman will usually just enjoy being spoiled by him, while at the same time keeping herself open to hooking up with another guy who can give her what she really wants in a relationship.
There’s nothing wrong with being nice to her, but just make sure that you’re not using that as your main strategy to get her back, because it doesn’t work.
What does work?
Getting an ex back is mostly about making her feel respect and sexual attraction for you.
That is what counts because those are the “feelings” that matter to her the most.
Feeling nice, supported, appreciated and so on is great, but it doesn’t get her wet and horny.
If you want your ex back for real, you have to make her respect you as a man and feel sexually attracted to the way that you now think, talk, feel, behave and act.
4. Thinking that giving her time will change the situation.
There’s an old saying of, “Time heals all wounds” and it usually is true.
Yet, when it comes to getting an ex back, it just isn’t the best way of thinking.
Watch this to understand why giving her loads of time usually isn’t the answer…
Time may heal the “wounds” that she suffered during the relationship (e.g. disappointment, loss of attraction, loss of respect), but it will rarely make her come running back to you.
When a woman is sitting home alone after a break up and thinking about her ex, she’s usually feeling a lot of negative emotions such as anger, contempt or indifference.
If she doesn’t hear from her ex for a long time, she will usually think something like, “After all that begging and pleading my ex hasn’t even bothered to see how I’m doing. Huh? Clearly I didn’t mean that much to him after all. Well, that’s it then. That chapter of my life is now closed and I’m moving on.”
Giving an ex too much space usually causes more problems that it solves.
- She starts going out with her single girlfriends to meet new guys.
- She starts believing that you’re over her, so she moves on by having sex with new guys and falling in love to make herself feel better.
- She assumes that you not contacting her means that you don’t care about her or the anymore.
- She assumes that you are still the same old immature guy who begged and pleaded and now doesn’t even now how to fix the problem and get her back.
- She stops feeling the pain of the break up and realizes that she’s perfectly fine without you in her life.
- She gets annoyed with you for not making an effort to contact her and then she becomes more stubborn and closed off towards you if you decide to contact her later on.
Giving a woman space can work in some situations, but in most ex back cases that I’ve worked on, a guy just need to actively get the woman back by calling her, meeting up with her and guiding her back into an even better relationship than before.
When She Feels Attracted to You Again, She Won’t Be Able to Fully Ignore You
If your ex girlfriend is ignoring you because you begged her to take you back, it might feel like you’ve lost her forever and that she will never change her mind.
She can and she will.
When she feels respect and attraction for you again, she will naturally and automatically reconnect with her original feelings of love for you.
So, from now on, just use every opportunity you get to interact with her (even if to begin with it’s just sending her a text message, or via social media) to re-spark her feelings of respect and attraction for you.
The best way to do that is by making her laugh, smile and feel happy to be hearing from you.
Let her see that you’ve moved beyond the level that you were at when she broke up with you and that you can now give her the attraction experience she wants.
If she can see that you have already begun to change and that you’re no longer the begging, immature guy that she remembers, her feelings for you will automatically change.
She will begin to see you in a more positive light and then ignoring you will seem petty or “wrong” to her.
She will feel the need to text you, talk to you on the phone and see you in person.
If you keep making her feel attracted, she will want to kiss you, hug you and have sex with you again.
So, don’t worry about the past; now is all that matters.
You can change how she feels now.
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