Here are 8 different ways to make your ex want you again:
1. Focus on the 5 main things that would make her want you again
Those 5 things are:
1. Renewed respect
Some of the things that will make her feel renewed respect for you are:
- Quickly learning from your mistakes and becoming a better man as a result (e.g. more confident, emotionally open, not taking everything so seriously anymore, more assertive).
- Not feeling nervous or unsure of yourself when she’s being offish or saying she will never want you again.
- Responding differently to what she expects (e.g. she expects you to get annoyed or upset when she tells you to leave her alone, but you actually remain calm, relaxed and use humor to diffuse the situation and make her want to be around you more).
The more respect you make her feel, the more she will open back up to you.
2. New feelings of attraction
A woman’s attraction can be created or sparked and brought back to life, based on how you think, talk, behave, feel and act around her.
For example: Here are some of the ways you can create new feelings of attraction in your ex and make her want you again…
- Use playfully challenging humor and allow sexual sparks to fly between you and her again, rather than being the nice, polite gentle guy she’s grown used to (and bored of).
- Make it clear to her via the way you talk and interact with her that you still find her sexy and desirable, rather than treating her like a neutral friend.
- Stand up to her in a loving, but assertive way so she can see you’ve manned up and are now able to handle her confident, independent personality, rather than letting her control the dynamic of the conversation or interaction.
3. Reconnecting with her feelings of love
That happens naturally without any effort on your part when a woman is feeling respect and attraction for you.
4. Sensing that a relationship would feel even better than before
Based on your approach to her, she can sense that you are now able to create a more ideal relationship dynamic (i.e. you treat her well and make her feel loved and appreciated but also motivate her to be a good woman back to you), which will result in her being happy with you rather than miserable.
5. Realizing that she could lose this better version of you
You have leveled up and are now a better version of yourself.
So, when you interact with her from now on and she notices that you have become the kind of man she always wanted (and that other women want), it motivates her to get back together, rather than risk losing you.
2. Get clear on the subtle things about your approach to her that turned her off
In most cases, a man knows some of the bigger reasons why his ex broke up with him (e.g. they’re having financial problems, she doesn’t like his friends, she wants to settle down and he doesn’t or vice versa, they keep getting into fights).
Yet, there are also many, more subtle things that turn a woman off that she rarely tells her man about.
For example: Some of the subtle things that can turn a woman off and cause her to break up with her man are…
- He was too quick to criticize her.
- He was too nice all the time so she never felt like she had to do anything much to impress him. As a result, she felt bored and unchallenged in the relationship.
- He needed too much emotional support from her so she ended up feeling like she was always taking care of him like she would a child.
- He struggled to handle the natural changes in her mood (e.g. he needed her to be consistent like him, behaved in an annoying way to get attention or a reaction out of her, was unable to turn arguments or disagreements into something that brought them closer together, didn’t know how to properly flirt with her).
- His body language was weak, unsure, nervous, stressed, needy, desperate, or feminine.
- He didn’t have the emotional masculinity to be the leader in their relationship so she had to do it.
These are just a few examples and may or may not apply to your relationship with your ex.
The important thing is to understand why she was really turned off by you, so you can then make the right changes that have the most impact on her.
3. Attract her via social media before contacting her
To do that you need to make sure that you delete any recent photos of you on your own, of your pet/house/car, or memes with depressing themes.
Replace anything that can be interpreted as you being lonely or sad with photos of you having fun with other people, looking confident, happy and content.
Important: Your photos must be recent (i.e. since the breakup) and of you with other people, smiling and looking happy.
Forget the sunsets, your coffee, your plate of food at the new restaurant, or even of you by yourself, no matter how good you think you look.
Regardless of how good you look in a selfie, or how great the sunset or tasty the food, it simply won’t have the desired effect (i.e. sparking her curiosity and making her want to interact with you) if you’re on your own.
Some women will actually ignore an ex if he seems lonely, lost or sad without her.
Some reasons why are:
- She wonders if it’s because other people don’t like him now due to him having lost so much confidence after being dumped by her.
- She assumes he can’t work up the courage to get out and have some fun without her.
- She sees it as a sign that he’s still grieving the loss of her in his life and is still needy for her.
- It makes him come across as being anti-social or a loner now.
Then, even if none of those things are true, she believes she’s better off without him and continues moving on.
On the other hand, a lot of women feel attracted to men who do the opposite (i.e. are happy and enjoying life without her).
Some reasons why are:
- It shows her that him contacting her, isn’t out of feelings of neediness or desperation. As a result, she naturally feels more comfortable replying to him (i.e. because she doesn’t have to worry about him pressuring her into getting back together again).
- She feels drawn to the fact that he has become so confident since the breakup and has been able to handle things so well.
- His value goes up in her eyes (i.e. he’s now more of the kind of man that other women would like and feel attracted to), so she suddenly doesn’t want to lose him.
So, make sure that you focus on genuinely having fun with other people and then posting photos of those good times, so she can see them if she happens to look after you contact her.
4. Make her realize that you are a better option than her risking more time dating other guys
Dating isn’t always easy for both men and women.
According to some studies, 60% of unmarried relationships break up within 2 months and 70% end within 1 year.
So, a woman will almost always prefer to get back with an ex that she already knows, than to start over with a completely different guy, spend months getting to know him and then end up breaking up anyway.
However, she won’t get back with her ex, if she’s not convinced that he’s a better option compared to finding a new man.
In the case of your ex, it’s up to you to show her that you are (a better option).
Not by telling her, but by showing her via your actions, behavior and the way you look and respond to her.
Let her see that you’ve leveled up as a man and can now offer her a completely different relationship experience.
Change how she feels about the old you by letting her experience the new you.
When you change and improve on the things that caused her to lose touch with her feelings of sexual attraction and romantic love for you (e.g. you’re no longer the clingy, needy guy she fell out of love with, you’re more assertive and emotionally masculine), her feelings for you will also change.
It happens naturally and automatically, even if she doesn’t want it to or if she tries to fight it or hide it.
5. Make sure that you only want her back, but don’t need her back
It may sound the same, but it isn’t.
Wanting her back means that you still love her and would like to experience the true power of new love in a relationship with her again.
On the other hand, needing her implies that you’re unable to cope with the emotional pain of being without her.
You can’t move forward with your life because you’re lonely and sad and the future seems hopeless without her.
Unfortunately, neediness is a huge turn off for most women.
It isn’t romantic to them and doesn’t make them feel flattered.
That only happens in the movies or in romantic stories.
In the real world, neediness in a man implies that a woman will have to take on the responsibility of supporting him emotionally and making him feel worthy, happy and full of self-esteem.
If a woman has to do that, she feels like his mother or teacher.
Yet, she wants to feel like his girl.
So, if you want to make your ex want you again, focus on getting to the point where you truly believe that you don’t need her to feel happy and enjoy your life.
You can’t pretend that you’re happy though.
You have to genuinely feel happy, content and emotionally fulfilled without her.
If you try to fake it, she will sense it via your body language, or by what you say and she will remain closed off.
6. Call her and if she doesn’t answer, send her a confident voice text
Texting may be easier and more convenient, but a call or voice text is much more effective in getting a favorable response from an ex woman.
It’s a lot more honest than a bunch of words on a screen.
A call or voice message doesn’t allow a guy to hide any feelings of insecurity or neediness he may be feeling.
Likewise, he can’t fake being confident, relaxed or at ease.
Instead, it’s right there in the tone of his voice.
Another reason why hearing a guy’s voice is so much more effective in attracting a woman is because it takes a lot more courage to talk to her than it does to hide behind typed words.
Courage, confidence and emotional strength are all qualities that are instinctively attractive to women.
In many cases, a spark can immediately happen on a call or because of how a guy sounds in voice texts.
On the other hand, the negative consequences of typed texts are:
- They can easily be ignored.
- They don’t have much of an impact (e.g. it is neutral or boring, so it doesn’t inspire her to want to talk to him over the phone or see him in person).
- It can result in texting back and forth until misunderstandings happen (e.g. she interprets something the wrong way, gets annoyed and decides to stop replying or asks him to leave her alone and not contact her again).
- It can cause her to feel as though he’s not really that interested if he can’t talk to her over the phone or in person.
So, at the very least, use voice texts to open the lines of communication with your ex.
Then transition to a phone call.
She will already have heard your voice in the voice text, sensed your confidence and that you’re not being needy and as a result, will be a lot more open and curious to talk to you.
7. Take control of the situation and lead the way, rather than relying on her to do it
Sometimes a woman will be missing her ex, but be afraid to contact him because she is worried he might reject her (e.g. because she broke up with him initially, he’s not interested anymore, he’s moved on and has a new girl already).
So she forces herself to move on, even though there’s a good chance she would get back together with him if he made a move.
Likewise, a guy might re-attract his ex-on a call or in person, but then just wait for clear, obvious signs from her that she is interested in getting back together again.
In almost all cases, he won’t get them.
Regardless of how attracted she feels, or how much she wants to reconcile, a woman will usually wait for the man to take the lead and guide them both back into a relationship.
If he doesn’t, she will often prefer to force herself to get over him and move on with a new man, than make a move and risk being rejected or ending up in a relationship with a timid man who doesn’t have the balls to go after what he wants in life.
So, don’t be that type of man.
Be courageous and emotionally masculine enough to lead the way and get the relationship with your ex back together again.
8. Follow a proven plan, rather than just doing whatever comes to mind
Many of the things a guy will try to get an ex back just won’t work.
Most of those things come from a place of insecurity, desperation, or a lack of awareness of what attracts women.
For example: Some ineffective things a guy might do to try and get his ex to want him again are…
- He starts begging and pleading with her to change her mind, which makes her perceive him as emotionally weak and turns her off even more.
- He makes promises to change and become the man she wants him to be if she will just give him another chance.
- He uses the No Contact Rule (i.e. cuts off all contact for 30 or even 60 days) in the hope that she will miss him and come running back.
- Sends her walls of text or long emails telling her how much he loves her and how he can’t live without her. Yet, that usually causes her to see him as selfish because he’s only thinking about what he wants rather than what she wants.
Of course, in most cases, these things don’t work, so he gives up on the chance of getting his ex back.
Don’t let that happen to you.
There is a proven plan you can follow that will help you make your ex want you again sooner than you may have thought possible.
So, stop wasting time and start doing the things that will get her back today.
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