Here are 5 reasons why a woman will say that to her ex boyfriend:
1. She is genuinely busy and only wants to have casual sex, rather than having to deal with the pressures and obligations of a committed relationship
After a break up, a woman will usually try keep herself busy (e.g. focus more on her career or studies, party with her single friends, travel, try new things that she couldn’t do because of her relationship) as a way of hopefully getting over her ex and moving on.
While doing that, she might realize that even though she likes her ex and misses him, she actually enjoys the freedom of being single again.
Additionally, if she has a lot going on in her life, she may find that she doesn’t have the time or energy for a committed relationship right now.
So, if her ex tries to convince her to give him another chance, she says something along the lines of, “I’m sorry, but I can’t. Maybe sometime in the future we can get back together again, but for now, I can’t handle everything in my life and be a good girlfriend to you as well. You deserve better. I just can’t offer you what you want. I’m just too busy to be in a relationship right now.”
If her ex can honestly accept that she doesn’t want to be in a committed relationship where they see each other all the time, text regularly and so on, then she may open up to having casual sex with him from time to time.
Then, if he approaches the attraction process correctly, he can seduce her back into a relationship with him.
Yet, if he pushes for a committed, boyfriend-girlfriend relationship and seems to only want that, then she will most likely continue rejecting him.
Then, as a way of moving forward without her ex, she will feel motivated to hook up with another guy who isn’t interested in being in a relationship and is happy to enjoy the benefits of sex without commitment.
If she happens to really like the new guy, she may even get into a committed relationship with him and then it will be a different ex back case altogether.
So, before your ex moves on, you should start approaching the ex back process in a new way.
Rather than pushing for a relationship, you should use every interaction that you have with her from now on to make her experience new feelings of respect, attraction and love for you.
You can’t achieve that by using the same approach you’ve been using.
You have to use a new and different approach to attraction.
An approach that will make her feel like she would be the one who ends up regretting losing you, if she doesn’t give you another chance.
The more you are able to attract her in new and interesting ways that she hasn’t experienced with you before, the more she will feel like she shouldn’t let go of what she has with you.
Based on you being able to easily re-attract her, she will begin to worry that other women will now find you so much more attractive.
The fear of you meeting a new woman who is potentially as pretty or prettier than her, can make her feel compelled to just open back up to you and give the relationship another chance for now, rather than ending up feeling like she got rejected and left behind by you.
However, if you continue pushing for her to commit to a relationship before making her feel that way, then will likely just keep saying that she is too busy for a relationship.
Eventually, she will stop replying to your texts or answering your calls and may even get to the point where she blocks your number for a while, so she can start moving on with new guys.
Don’t make that mistake.
Another possible reason why your ex said that she likes you, but is too busy for a relationship, is…
2. She doesn’t feel enough attraction for you anymore to be motivated to have a relationship
She may have some feelings for you, but not enough to make her want to get back together.
This often happens when the relationship started out well (e.g. they had an unique connection, he was a good guy to her, the sex was good, they enjoyed a lot of fun and interesting times together), but then, over time, it ended up feeling more like a friendship than a romantic, sexual relationship.
In other words, the attraction was there initially, but it then fizzled out and remained that way for quite a while.
Some women will put up with that kind of relationship dynamic for years (i.e. no spark, no strong desire), whereas some will only put up with it for weeks or months and then leave.
Whatever the case is though, at some point, a woman will begin to wonder things like, “Why don’t I feel as attracted to him as I used to? Should I stay in this relationship even though I don’t feel like I’m in love now? Would I be better off being single for a while, or trying a new relationship? Will he ever change? Should I wait for him to change? Can he change?”
If a woman senses that her guy either has no idea how or what to change, or he doesn’t seem motivated enough to change, she will usually go ahead and break up with him.
Yet, just because she breaks up with him, it doesn’t mean that all of her feelings for him are completely gone.
In many cases, the woman still likes her ex and thinks of him as a great guy.
It’s just that she doesn’t feel enough attraction and love for him to justify getting back into a sexual relationship.
In other words, she likes him as person, but she doesn’t feel those all important sexual and romantic sparks with him.
As a result, she doesn’t see the point to getting back into a boyfriend-girlfriend relationship with him.
She could and it would be convenient and easy, but she knows that he probably won’t change and as a result, her feelings won’t really be any different to before.
So, she feels confused about what to do.
In many cases, to try and work out what she should do, she will open herself up to texting with him, talking on the phone and even meeting in person.
Yet, if he still doesn’t know how to give her the kind of attraction experience she wants, she will continue rejecting him and then try to move on with a new guy instead.
Watch this video to learn more about how to give your girlfriend the attraction experience she really wants…
After helping new men get ex women back for many years now, I’ve found that when a man is in a situation like yours (i.e. your ex likes you, but is too busy to be in a relationship), he can easily change her mind by changing his approach to attraction.
For example: If he was too neutral with her and treated her more like an equal friend, he now starts being more masculine in the way he speaks, thinks, feels and behaves, so she can then feel more feminine in comparison to him.
When a woman feels very feminine in comparison to a man’s masculinity, she automatically feels magnetically attracted to him.
It’s a primal, instinctive attraction that applies in today’s world, regardless of how “strong” or independent a woman is.
At the end of the day, a woman wants to feel girly and feminine in comparison to her man’s masculinity.
She may not be willing to admit that, because she doesn’t want a guy to feel too empowered to be manly, but she will react to it with attraction, respect, love and devotion.
Not many guys truly understand how a woman’s attraction works and as a result, they struggle to attract new women or keep relationships together their entire life.
Don’t let that happen to you with your ex, or with your future relationships.
Now is the best time for you to truly understand attraction and use it to re-attract your ex back into a relationship that is even better than before.
Another possible reason why your ex said that she liked you, but is too busy for a relationship, is this…
3. It’s just an excuse to hopefully convince you to give her some space while she moves on behind your back
When a guy gets broken up with against his will (i.e. his girl wants to break up, but he doesn’t), he will naturally feel compelled to get her back to stop the painful emotions he is experiencing.
He might then end up texting, calling, messaging, e-mailing and even showing up unexpectedly at places where he feels he can bump into his ex girl and try and convince her to give him another chance.
As a result, the girl can end up feeling quite pressured and smothered by his approach to getting her back.
So, to hopefully get him to give her some space, a woman might say something along the lines of, “Look…I like you, but I’m too busy to be in a relationship at the moment. You’re a great guy, but I just can’t be in a relationship. Maybe sometime in the future when things have calmed down for me, then okay we can get back together again. For now though, I just need some space. I need you to respect that. I need time to get my life under control. Now is not the time for me to be in a relationship. You need to give me some space.”
Since she is saying that they can get back together in future, the guy might then back off for a little while, thinking that he’s eventually going to get her back.
In the meantime though, the woman will almost always (I’d estimate at least 95% based on the 1,000s of ex back cases I’ve dealt with) use the time apart to quickly find herself a new man.
She will do that to create an additional barrier in between her and her ex getting back together (i.e. she can say that she has a new boyfriend now and he doesn’t want her speaking with her ex), or to hopefully make her ex feel turned off by the idea of another man sleeping with her, which will then make him give up on getting her back.
It’s a pretty common tactic women use to get out of a relationship and reduce their ex’s motivation to get them back.
Yet, on the surface, she is just saying, “I don’t have time for a relationship now. Give me some time to get my life under control and after that, we can probably get back together.”
It seems totally innocent and fine.
Yet, when her ex contacts her after a few weeks or so to ask something like, “Hey, how are you? Have things settled down in your life, or? I’ve been missing you. Are you ready to give our relationship another try?” she will be able to say something along the lines of, “I’m sorry, but I have a new boyfriend now. I really didn’t intend for things to turn out this way, but it just happened. You’re a great guy and I hate the idea of hurting you, but I met someone else and now I’m with him. Please accept that and move on.”
At that point, many guys will feel angry at their ex for leading them on.
Hopefully you won’t have to go through that horrible experience now that you’ve read about it and know what can happen if you wait too long to get her back.
If you want your ex back, you don’t allow yourself to fall into the trap of giving her too much space in the hope that she will remain single and then some day, she will suddenly be less busy and then want to be with you.
Of course, that doesn’t mean you should chase after her in a needy, desperate way and turn her off in the process.
Instead, simply stick around as her “friend” so you can use interactions that you have with her (e.g. via text, social media, audio or video phone calls, in person catch ups) to re-attract her.
Make her feel the type of attraction that causes her to feel as though she will be the one losing out if she let you go.
Let her fear that you might be the one that got away for her and that she might end up regretting it and missing you her entire life.
Of course, don’t tell her that (that won’t work).
You have to make her feel it (that is what works).
Another possible reason why your ex said it is…
4. The relationship took up too much of her time because of how much you liked to text, talk on the phone or hang out
Although it can initially be fun for a woman to text, chat and hang out with a new boyfriend all the time, her instincts will eventually kick in and tell her that something isn’t right, if her boyfriend continues to behave in that way.
A woman’s instincts push her to be with a man who has purpose and ambition outside of a relationship with her.
Her instincts also cause her to lose interest when a guy makes his whole life about her and spends so much time with her (or on her via text) that he neglects following through on his true potential as a man outside of the relationship.
She may not be able to explain it clearly to a guy, but she will say things like, “I just don’t feel the same way anymore” even if the relationship was totally amazing initially.
She goes from being completely in love with him and happy, to, “I just don’t know how I feel anymore.”
It’s very confusing for guys who don’t understand how a woman’s attraction really works.
As a result, a guy who is unaware, will often make the mistake of constantly texting his girlfriend, spending all of spare time with her and letting her see that his life has essentially become all about her.
From his point of view, he’s being a great boyfriend because he is so committed to her, so in love with her and so connected with her.
Yet, from her perspective, she increasingly begins to feel as though he is a needy, clingy boyfriend who isn’t rising through the level of his true potential as a man outside of the relationship with her.
Additionally, his approach to the relationship takes up so much of her time and she instinctively feels as though it’s not leading to progress in life.
They’re just hanging out and wasting time.
In addition to her instinctive reaction, that approach to a relationship can also cause a woman to feel resentful towards her guy for leading her along a path of essentially wasting time.
As a result, she begins to disconnect for her feelings of respect and attraction for him, which then makes her start to fall out of love with him.
When that happens, a woman will usually then decide to break up with her boyfriend and try to find herself a man who will be more focused on making progress in life.
If her ex then tries to get her back (without even realizing where has been going wrong), she might say, “I really do like you, but I’m just too busy to be in a relationship” to avoid hurting his feelings, or having to explain why she is feeling that way (if she can) and then having to deal with him saying, “Okay, please give me another chance. I will change. I will focus more on my goals, I promise. Just give me a chance.”
Many women don’t want to put their boyfriend in a position where he is desperately offering to change and be what she wants, because that is also unattractive to women.
Women are attracted to men who able to be a man, without needing a woman to help them and guide them (i.e. take on a big sister or mother role, or behave like a mentor or teacher).
So, if you made the mistake of focusing way too much on her and neglecting your progress as a man, then you need to start getting clear on what your biggest goals, dreams and aspirations are as a man.
You don’t have to achieve any of them right now, of course.
You just need to get clear on them and start moving towards them, so the next time you talk to her (hopefully within a few days. Don’t leave it too long or she may move on), she can sense that you have already begun to change and become the sort of man she really wants and she didn’t even have to tell you what to do.
That is such a relief for a woman to see.
It takes all the pressure off her shoulders when she can see that you’ve manned up, without having to turn to her for help (which she won’t want to give anyway).
It shows her that you are the sort of man who will become more of a man over time because you get it now.
Women know how rare it is to find a man like that and when they do, they hold on tight.
When your ex senses this change in you, she will then begin to crave your time and attention and put in the effort to contact you.
So, here’s what you need to do:
- Stop contacting her for a few days (or a week at the most).
- Improve your ability to attract her during interactions.
- Interact with her and re-attract her. Arrange a catch up if you sense she wants it. If not;
- Give her a few more days of space and contact her again. Arrange a catch up.
Another possible reason why a woman will tell her ex that she likes him, but doesn’t have the time or energy for a relationship at the moment is…
5. She is studying for a degree that requires a lot of work, or is involved in a demanding career where she works many hours per week
Sometimes a serious, committed relationship and all of the responsibilities that can go with it (e.g. texting, seeing her boyfriend regularly) can just be too much for a woman who is honestly busy with her life.
That doesn’t mean you have to give up on her though.
Instead, simply agree to be friends with her for now and use that friendship (and the occasional interactions that go along with it) to make her miss you and want you back.
In other words, don’t be an innocent non-flirtatious friend who wants to “be there for her” or anything like that.
Instead, be a sexy, appealing who she can’t stop thinking about in a sexual way.
The more attracted she feels to you, the less she will want to lose you.
She will then feel motivated to find a way to career (or studies) and her relationship with you.
Mistakes to Avoid When Getting a Busy Woman Back
The reality is that, even if a woman is busy, she will go out of her way to make time for a man who makes her feel the kind of irresistible attraction that every woman tries hard to find in a relationship.
You know the feeling when it comes to women.
Maybe even with your ex.
That unstoppable, never ending desire to just be with her in every way.
You can make your ex feel like that about you, but to do so, it’s important that you avoid the following mistakes…
1. Trying to work things out with her via text, which just makes her feel more stressed and overwhelmed with the workload of her life
Trying to work relationship problems out via text is exhausting.
There’s just so much that could be discussed and when it does begin to be discussed via text, there are almost always misunderstandings of what the other person actually means.
Then, there more explanations are needed, apologies come in, attempts to recover from the texting mistake come in and so on.
It can turn into a lot of effort, which is something that a busy girl doesn’t want to have to put in, especially after breaking up with a guy that she no longer has enough feelings to be with him.
This can result in a girl wanting to block her ex’s number or social media profile, so she can try to get on with her life without him.
So, if you want to get your busy ex back, don’t try to discuss things with her via text, mend the relationship or even just have ongoing, friendly chats about random things that go on and on.
What should you do instead?
Call her (video or audio call).
A call cuts through all the texting misunderstandings and allows you to instantly begin attracting her based on your confidence, masculinity, humor and so on.
When she can sense (audio call) or see (video call) that she feels comfortable talking to you and also feels attracted to you, then she realizes that catching up in person would most likely feel good too.
As a result, she is so much more likely to agree to catching up in person if you call her (and re-attract her on the call), rather than if you keep texting her and end up making her feel like interacting with you is stressful, time consuming and frustrating.
The reality is that if you hide behind texts, it just adds to her stress levels and then she feels like blocking your number, so she doesn’t have to deal with you anymore.
Don’t put yourself in that situation.
If you do, then you probably won’t be able to talk to her again (or for a long time), which will make it difficult to get her back.
Another mistake is…
2. Not realizing that she would most likely be happy with a friends with benefits relationship, if you could just adapt to that for now
Having an all or nothing mentality (i.e. she either accepts a committed, boyfriend-girlfriend relationship with you or nothing) with your ex will push her away if she is secretly just interested in a friends with benefits (i.e. casual sex sometimes, no commitment) relationship at the moment.
Don’t push away an FWB opportunity with her.
Allow it, so you can then have an excuse to see each other and as result, you then have an opportunity to re-attract her further and make her feel like she doesn’t want to lose you.
3. Trying to make her feel sorry for you based on how confused you are by her behavior
Sometimes, a guy makes the mistake of thinking that if he shows his ex woman how much pain and confusion he’s feeling based on her reason for leaving the relationship, she will feel so bad about it that she will decide to stick with the relationship.
Yet, it almost never works out that way.
Here’s the thing…
It’s a woman’s natural instinct to be more attracted to the kind of guy who has the emotional strength to cope with the problems and challenges that life throw at him, compared to a guy who breaks down emotionally and seeks pity (especially from women).
So, when a guy is looking for pity from his ex woman, she actually feels turned off by him.
She then feels glad that she broke up with him when she did and motivated to find herself a man who doesn’t seek, need or want pity from a woman.
Always remember this: A woman doesn’t want to be in a relationship with a man out of a sense of pity, or guilt.
A woman wants to be with a man because he makes her feel good.
When a woman is with a man who makes her feel good, she won’t want to end a relationship due to being busy because she knows that another quality woman will get with him in a heartbeat.
If that happens, she will be the rejected one who has gotten left behind.
So, to avoid that emotional pain, she will go out of her way to spend enough time with her boyfriend to keep the relationship alive.
On the other hand, if her boyfriend is seeking pity from her due to her leaving him based on being too busy, she will feel turned off and smothered by his neediness.
Another mistake to avoid is…
4. Not focusing on using humor to get her enjoying the interactions she has with you
If a woman is busy, she will usually feel stressed and pressured by all the things going on her life.
Instant relief from all of that pressure is laughter.
If you can approach your interactions with her from no on, with a focus on making her laugh and feel good, she will naturally want to interact with you more and see you in person because you are her relief from all the stress.
On the other hand, if you call or text your ex and annoy her by saying something like, “I don’t understand why you are doing this. You said you like me, so why don’t you want to be with me? I promise that I won’t take up so much of your time anymore. I just want to be with you. Please…let’s give our relationship another chance,” chances are high that she will feel stressed because you are pushing for something she doesn’t want right now.
Additionally, if you interact with her and just try to be her friend and “be there for her” or have serious conversations about things, she probably won’t feel the all important sparks of sexual and romantic attraction needed for her to want to be with you physically.
Then, if another guy comes along and sparks her sexual and romantic feelings, don’t be surprised if she says something along the lines of, “I really wasn’t looking for a relationship because I was busy, but he swept me off my feet. I’m sorry, but I think it’s better if we stop talking to each other. I wish you all the best.”