It depends on whether or not you really do love her, miss her and want to make something work with her.
Here are 4 options for you.
Option 1: Re-attract her, hook up with her sexually and then walk away
Sometimes, a guy just wants to know that he can get a cheating ex back if he wants to.
However, deep down, he might not really want to be in a relationship with her, because he knows that if she cheated on him once, nothing will really stop her from doing it again.
In a case like that, re-attracting her, hooking up with her and walking away is all he needs, to be able to move on without having hang-ups about what happened.
So, if you feel that you want to prove a point to yourself by re-attracting your ex, hooking up with her sexually and then walking away, go ahead and make it happen.
Start by calling her on the phone and using some humor to make her smile, laugh and feel at ease when talking to you again.
Additionally, throw in a bit of flirting, so that you create some sexual tension between you.
The more attracted you make her feel on the call, the more open she will become to meeting up with you in person.
Then when you see her in person, continue to say and do the types of things that will make her feel attracted to you.
Build up the sexual tension between you so she wants to kiss and have sex with you again.
For example: Imagine that you and her are sitting together having coffee at a local café and she’s drinking a latté.
To flirt with her and thereby create sexual tension between you, you can say something along the lines of, “You look so cute with that foam mustache on your top lip.”
Then add, “Let me get that for you,” and then lean over, hold her chin gently with one hand and wipe her mouth with your napkin with the other.
Do that while looking into her eyes and then back to her lips, giving her the impression that what you really want to do is kiss her.
She will likely blush and feel a bit self-conscious, while at the same time also feeling attracted to you and possibly even begin thinking things like, “I wish it was more than that napkin touching my lips. I can’t believe I’m thinking this but I wish he would just kiss me.”
At that point, lean back and continue talking normally as if nothing happened.
Then, once you sense things have calmed down between you, flirt with her again (e.g. lean in closer to her and say, “Mmmm… you smell good,” or “That lipstick you’re wearing looks totally kissable,” alternatively, touch her hand in passing or lean forward and gently move her hair out of her face) and then relax back into ordinary conversation once more.
By this stage, she will likely be more than willing to release some of the sexual desire in her with at least a hug.
Then, once you have her in your arms, slowly and confidently lean in and give her a kiss as well.
From there, if she seems willing suggest going back to your place or hers and hook up with her sexually.
Then, when she seems relaxed and possibly even hinting about you and her getting back together again, you can say something along the lines of, “Sorry, but I don’t want to be in a relationship with a woman who has a habit of cheating. I deserve better. Thanks for the catch up, but I think it’s better if we go our separate ways,” and just walk away, knowing that you ended things on your terms, not hers.
Alternatively, you can go with…
Option 2: Re-attract her, hook up with her sexually, enjoy a new relationship and make her fall back in love with you, then break up with her when you’re ready
In some cases, a guy might feel that he wants to teach his ex girlfriend a lesson for cheating on him.
So, rather than just move on after she got dumped, he might decide to re-attract her, get her back and then when she is vulnerable and in love with him again, dump her to get his revenge.
So, if you feel that you want to hurt your ex for cheating on you, this may be the option you want to take.
That means, you really have to think, act and behave in ways that will re-spark her sexual and romantic feelings for you and make her want to be your girl again.
For example: You need to be…
- More confident and self-assured than ever before, so that nothing she says or does can get to you.
- More of a challenge than you used to be (e.g. don’t agree with everything she says or wants you to do, don’t reply to her calls or text messages right away, don’t always make yourself available to her when she wants you), so she feels as though she has to now work hard to impress you.
- Charming and charismatic during interactions so her guard naturally comes down.
- More emotionally masculine than in the past so that you make her feel feminine and girly in your presence, rather than being too nice or gentle and not creating enough of a masculine/feminine dynamic between you which results in her perceiving you only as a friend.
The more you make her feel attracted in new and exciting ways, the more she will want to get back into a relationship with you.
Then, hook up with her sexually and blow her mind in ways that you never have before (e.g. take longer with foreplay and build up the sexual tension by kissing, touching and teasing, try something that you’ve never tried before such as a different position or by building her up and then pulling away just before she climaxes and then starting all over again).
Make her want you both physically and emotionally more than she ever did before.
Then, once she has fallen back in love with you and feels as though you and her might have a future together, you can dump her to get your revenge on her for cheating on you.
For example: You can wait for a special occasion like her birthday and then say something like, “I have something important I want to say to you.”
She will then likely begin thinking things like, “I wonder what he wants to tell me? Is it possible that he’s going to ask me to move in with him/marry him? I feel so excited!”
Then, when she’s all eager and happy, you can say something along the lines of, “This has been a log time coming, but I think today it’s time for me to make it official. I’m breaking up with you. You’re a disloyal, cheating bitch and I definitely don’t intend to waste my life with you. Maybe some other sucker will fall for your conniving ways, but that guy is not me. It’s over. Bye,” and leave her feeling broken, knowing that you have gotten your revenge on her.
Alternatively, you can choose…
Option 3: Re-attract her, hook up with her sexually, enjoy a new relationship and make her fall back in love with you, then stay together
If you truly believe that your ex is the love of your life and that you can genuinely forgive her for cheating on you without throwing it in her face every time you have a fight, then one of the best decisions you will ever make is to focus on getting her back for another chance at the relationship.
You can easily do that if you want to by using a different approach to attraction than before, so you can regain her respect, attraction and love.
When your re-spark her sexual and romantic feelings for you, she will naturally open herself up to the idea of you and her being together as a couple again.
So, how do you go about reactivating her feelings for you?
That depends on what turned her off before to cause her to cheat on you with another guy and what she really needs to experience with you to feel a renewed sense of respect, attraction and love.
For example: Here are some of the changes that your ex might want to see in you, so she can feel attracted to you again.
- You now maintain your confidence around her at all times, rather than letting what she says or does affect how your feel (e.g. you become insecure and unsure of yourself, you feel jealous, you feel hurt by her words or actions).
- You no longer allow her to push you around and get away with disrespecting you or behaving badly (e.g. throwing tantrums, sulking) like you used to. Instead, you can now see her for what she is (i.e. an emotional woman) and you can laugh at her in a loving way when she’s being a brat, rather than get upset or feel annoyed by her behavior.
- Rather than just having the same, comfortable sex you and her have been having all along, you’re now bolder with her, making it an experience that she can’t stop thinking about.
- You’re more emotionally dominant than her now, rather than letting her wear the pants in the relationship.
- You now truly believe in yourself and in your value to her, rather than feeling like she’s doing you a favor by being with you.
- You’re now more of a challenge to her and you make her feel as though she has to work hard to impress you and hold on to you, rather than like she doesn’t have to put in any effort at all.
- You now make her feel so sexy and desirable when she’s with you, that no other guy can make her feel the way you do.
By making some simple adjustments to your approach to attraction, you can then easily re-attract your ex and get her back.
From there, you need to focus on creating the kind of relationship dynamic where you’re good to her, make her feel loved, appreciated and desirable, while at the same time she feels motivated to be a good, loyal, loving woman to you.
When that happens, you can be assured that not only that the relationship will last, your ex will also never be tempted to cheat on you again, because she won’t ever want to lose you.
Alternatively, you might decide to go with…
Option 4: Attract new women and forget about her
Another decision you can make is to forget all about your cheating ex and move on without her.
Yes, maybe you still have feelings for her and maybe you want her back, but you don’t need her back to feel happy and fulfilled in your life.
So, rather than sitting around asking things like, “My girlfriend cheated on me and she then got dumped. Should I get her back?” you can instead focus on getting out, attracting new, beautiful women, hooking up with them sexually and forgetting all about her.
The more fun you begin to have without your ex in your life, the more you might come to realize that you’re actually better off without her.
You may begin noticing that there are many equally beautiful women out there who find you attractive and you can have your pick of them.
So why settle for a woman who is disloyal and has already broken your trust once before?
Eventually, you might even find another woman that you perceive as being perfect for you, fall in love with her and move on with her, ensuring that the only thing that remains of your ex is just a distant memory.
By the way…
Some of the ways you can get over your ex, begin meeting new women and move on are…
- Going out to clubs, bars and parties with your single friends to meet, attract and hook up with new women.
- Asking women that you’ve always been attracted to out on dates (e.g. someone at university or work, a woman in your neighborhood or apartment building, a friend of a friend).
- Joining a group activity where you are likely to meet new women (e.g. cooking, dancing or yoga classes).
- Volunteering for something that you feel strongly about (e.g. at an animal shelter, a community fundraiser, a political event, a religious event).
The more you put yourself out there, the more chances you will have to meet and hook up with new women.
Of course, it’s important that you know how to attract them and make them want to be with you.
Sometimes, a guy makes the mistake of interacting with other women and spending most of the time talking about his ex and how she cheated on him and how broken he feels about it.
That’s not going to help you move on.
This is why, you need to be sure that you are ready to let her go and move on with another woman.
If you’re not ready to do it, you might find yourself drifting from woman to woman for months and even years without ever being happy or content.
Instead, you always seem to find yourself thinking things like, “I wish things had turned out differently. I really miss my ex and I think she was the one for me.”
Don’t let that happen to you.
If you decide to move on, be certain that it’s the right thing for you to do, so that you never have any regrets about it later on.
On the other hand, if you don’t feel like it’s the right decision for you, then don’t do it.
Do what feels right.
That’s the only way you will be happy and content in your life.
The choice is yours.
Where Some Guys Go Wrong When Considering Getting Back With an Ex Who Cheated
If you decide that you want to get back with your ex, then you need to use the kind of approach that will quickly reactivate her sexual and romantic feelings for you and make her want you back too.
This is why it’s very important that you don’t make the kind of attraction mistakes that will end up turning her off even more.
She then doesn’t want to get back together again and prefers to move on with another man who isn’t you.
For example: Some of the mistakes to avoid that guys make in a similar situation to yours are…
1. Waiting too long to make a move and she then moves on with a new guy to make herself get over being dumped
In some cases, a guy spends a lot of time being afraid to make a move to re-attract an ex girlfriend who cheated on him and then got dumped.
In his mind he might be thinking things like, “What if she doesn’t want me anymore? Then not only will I be a fool for being cheated on, I will also be labeled desperate for chasing after her and being rejected. Maybe I should just wait for her to give me some kind of sign that she’s open to getting back together again and then I’ll make a move and at least I won’t embarrass myself.”
He might then wait and wait for a sign that never comes.
In the meantime, his ex could be thinking things like, “I really stuffed everything up. I had a great guy and then I went and cheated on him with a jerk and now I got dumped. Unfortunately, I can’t go back because it looks like my ex isn’t interested in me anymore, and I don’t blame him after what I put him through. I guess it’s time to accept that what I had in the past is over and move on and find another guy, and hopefully this time I won’t mess everything up.”
She may then just move on and find herself a new man to help her get over being dumped and her ex misses out on getting her back, because he didn’t have the courage to make a move sooner.
So, don’t let that happen to you.
If you are willing to forgive your ex for cheating on you and get back into a relationship with her, don’t sit around waiting for her to come back to you, because you will likely lose her for a second time.
Take action now.
Call her on the phone or meet up with her in person, reactivate her sexual and romantic feelings for you and get her back into a relationship with you that’s so much better than it was before.
Another mistake that guys make in a situation similar to yours is…
2. Not knowing that it will feel good for her to get back with him now that she has been dumped
Sometimes, a woman will resist getting back with a guy she cheated on, because she feels bad about having sex with someone else and hurting him, while he didn’t do anything wrong.
Additionally, a woman might worry that if she does give him another chance, he will continually throw her mistake in her face and use it against her to control her with guilt in the relationship.
So, if you can genuinely forgive your ex woman for what happened and then also reactivate her feelings of respect and attraction for you, she will feel like she won the guy lottery.
She will realize that she’s got the kind of guy that she needs to hold on to and cherish.
As a result, she will then put in the effort to be a good woman to you, treat you well, love you, respect you and most of all be loyal to you.
Then, when you’re a good guy to her too and you don’t punish her emotionally for her mistake, you will be able to build a happy and long lasting relationship together.
So, don’t be afraid to make a move.
She will likely be so grateful to you that you did.
Another mistake that guys make in a situation similar to yours is…
3. Not preparing himself to be more attractive emotionally and in the bedroom
Getting back an ex who cheated is not just about saying, “I forgive you. Let’s get back together again.”
Instead, a guy needs to be able to give her a new and improved attraction experience, both emotionally and sexually.
If emotionally he was needy and clingy before, he now needs to be more of a challenge to her so she feels as though she now has to put in the effort to impress him and keep him interested in her.
On the other hand, if he was sexually too boring and predictable (e.g. sex twice a week in the missionary position), he now prepares to blow her mind by being a different, more considerate, more exciting lover than before.
If he doesn’t change and then tries to get her back, she will usually just reject him and say things like, “Look, it’s over between us. Please accept that and move on.”
Alternatively, if she does give him another chance and then notices that he’s still the same guy as before, she will either break up with him and move on, or cheat on him again.
This is why it’s so important that you prepare to re-attract your ex in the ways that are important to her.
When she sees that you’ve really put in the effort to become a better man, she will naturally feel a renewed sense of respect and attraction for you.
It then becomes easy for you to fully reactivate her feelings, get her back and keep her in a happy relationship with you.
Another mistake that guys make in a situation similar to yours is…
4. Walking away from an opportunity to get her back and then regretting it for the rest of his life
It’s quite possible that your ex has learned her lesson and truly regrets cheating on you.
However, you will never know unless you take the chance of getting her back.
If you don’t, you might always wonder, “What if…” at the back of your mind.
Don’t let that happen.
Call her on the phone or meet up with her in person, reactivate her feelings for you and give yourself a chance to be back with her.
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