What does it mean when a woman says she is not ready for a relationship?
There’s usually just one main reason why (she doesn’t feel enough sexual attraction for you, which you can easily change and I’ll explain how in a minute), but there can also be a few other reasons why a woman will say that she’s not ready for a relationship with a guy.
It could mean that she’s the type of woman who has trust issues because of a difficult childhood (e.g. her father abandoned her), or because she’s had a lot of problems in relationships with other guys in the past.
It could also mean that she is the type of woman who is only interested in casual sex and dating at this point in her life.
As surprising as that may sound to some guys, a lot of women now enjoy the freedom of having sex with different guys, without ever getting into a serious relationship with any of them.
According to a study in the USA, 55% of couples admitted to having had sex on their first date and a European study found that 70% of women had experienced a one-night stand.
In other words, sex now happens all the time and usually very quickly (or immediately) after a man and woman meet and feel attracted to each other.
So, this particular woman that you like may be trying to tell you that she only wants casual sex and doesn’t want you falling madly in love with her and then asking her to marry you.
Another reason why a woman will say she is not ready for a relationship is because she is young and wants to focus on school or her university studies, rather than being swept away into a lifelong relationship with a guy.
All that being said, in most cases, the main reason a woman will tell a guy she is not ready for a relationship, is because she is trying to reject him without hurting his feelings.
She knows that he really likes her, but because he hasn’t done anything to make her feel attracted to him (i.e. he’s just been a nice friend to her), when he brings up the subject of them possibly being a couple, or if he suddenly tries to kiss her or initiate sex, she has to think of a reason to reject him; without being too mean about it.
So, rather than saying, “Hey, look…you’re a nice guy, but I don’t have any feelings for you because you haven’t said or done anything to turn me on. All you do is treat me nicely, which is great if you want to be my friend, but it’s not going to make me want to have sex with you,” she will just say something vague like, “I’m not ready for a relationship right now.”
In most cases, the guy will then think that he might have a chance with her if he can just wait a bit longer, continue to treat her nicely and be an even better friend to her.
Yet, if he doesn’t do anything to make her feel sexually attracted to him, he will most-likely see her getting in a serious relationship with another guy within days or weeks of saying to him, “I’m not ready for a relationship. I need time.”
Why would she say that and then get into a relationship with another guy?
The other guy will bypass her logical reasoning of not wanting to be in a relationship by making her feel sexually attracted and turned on by him during their interactions.
He will then have sex with her and after they have that intimate connection in bed, if he also has the ability to make her feel like she’d be lucky to be in a relationship with her (i.e. he is a challenge), she will then begin to try to convince her to have a relationship with her.
She didn’t want a relationship and now she’s trying to convince another guy to get into a relationship with her. How is that possible?
Watch this video to understand why women react in that way to guys who are a challenge to win over…
As you will discover from the video above, most women are bored at how easily impressed and interested 95% of guys are in having sex and beginning a relationship with them.
It’s so damn easy for an attractive woman to get laid or get a guy interested in a relationship.
So, after she gets bored of experiencing the instant, “Yes! I like you” reaction from 95% of guys, a woman will naturally begin to feel more attracted and excited to meet a guy who is more of a challenge to win over.
Yet, most guys aren’t aware of the reality that women live in.
So, when she hooks up with the new guy, it’s only natural for her male friend to feel confused, hurt, betrayed and even angry at what has just happened.
After all, he’s been so nice to her and they got along so well. So, what is her problem? Why would she do that to him? The bitch!
No, she’s not a bitch. She’s simply reacting to her feelings of attraction. A woman will naturally be interested in having a sexual relationship with a guy who makes her feel sexually attracted, rather than a guy who just makes her feel friendly emotions.
Watch this video to understand why…
Feeling confused about why a woman would behave in that way, a guy who has been rejected might call her a bitch behind her back, or feel as he’s just not good enough for women.
He might think, “It’s because I’m not good looking enough. If only I looked like a model, then women would like me” or “A woman like her wouldn’t date a guy like me. What was I thinking?”
Yet chances are, if he looks at the guy she ended up dating, he will most-likely see that he’s not any more better looking than himself.
Instead, the other guy simply has a more attractive personality than he does (i.e. he is more confident, has a more masculine vibe, can make her laugh by using the type of humor that women secretly love, etc).
If he doesn’t understand how a woman’s attraction for a man really works, he might think, “What does she see in him? He’s so ugly! I just don’t understand. What has that guy got that I don’t?”
What he doesn’t realize is that he could just as easily have been that guy to her. He could be the one dating her right now; if only he had done the right things to trigger her feelings of attraction for him.
Watch this video to understand how a woman’s attraction for a man really works and how you can use it to make sure that this woman wants to be with you and not some other guy…
First and Foremost, a Woman Wants to Feel Sexually Attracted to You
In most cases, for a woman to want to kiss, have sex and be in a relationship with a guy, she first needs to feel enough sexual attraction for him to justify taking the relationship to that level.
Sometimes, a woman who lacks experience with guys or who is desperate for some attention, will go ahead with kissing and sex just for the fun of it.
However, if a woman is attractive and has had experience with guys before, she will usually reject a guy until he has made her feel a sufficient amount of sexual attraction.
So, when a woman tells a guy that she is not ready for a relationship, what she’s really saying is, she’s not ready for a relationship with him at the moment, but she could be if he changes her approach.
His approach is off because he’s usually making one or more of the following mistakes:
1. He wants to be in a relationship with her, but he’s pretending to be her friend.
Some guys feel shy, nervous and insecure around women they like because they don’t know how to get her to feel as they do.
Without having much of an idea of how to make his crush feel sexually attracted to him and turned on by him during interactions, a guy will usually try to “grow” on a woman by pretending to just be a friend and hoping that, over time, she will come to like him because he’s such a good guy to her.
Rather than make his intentions clear right from the start (i.e. make her feel attracted and then say something like, “You’re sexy…I like you”), he assumes that by being a great friend to her, she will eventually wake up one morning and she’ll realize that she’s madly in love with him.
Of course, that’s how it works in Hollywood movies.
It’s so sweet, isn’t it?
Awww, the nice guy friend gets the girl in the end. Awww…how sweet.
Yayy!! Let’s go skipping and dancing! Oh, look at the rainbows! Oh, everything is so sweet and nice in fantasy land.
In real life, a woman will simply wait for a guy to trigger her feelings of sexual attraction. If he isn’t able to make that happen, she will remain “switched off” and place him in the same category as a brother or a favorite cousin – nice, but definitely not relationship material.
2. He’s being way too nice to her.
Just because a woman likes a guy as a person, it doesn’t mean that she will then feel sexually attracted to him.
Of course, there’s nothing wrong with being nice to a woman. In fact, when a guy has made a woman feel sexually attracted to him first (e.g. by being confident, charismatic, having a masculine vibe, etc) and he is then nice to her, she will see him as being a charming guy.
As you may have noticed, women love charming guys and hook up with them for sex and relationships, but nice guys just get to be a friend.
A mistake that some nice guys make is to assume that if he is extra polite to a woman, does whatever she wants and pays for everything, she’ll then be impressed by him and give the go ahead for a sexual relationship to begin.
That’s just not how it works.
Women don’t decide which guy to have a sexual relationship with based on who is the nicest and most well behaved around her.
If that was how human attraction worked, men would have to lay down on the ground and be walked all over by women in high heels to be considered worthy enough.
It would turn into a competition between men of who can be the nicest, sweetest, most polite guy in the world. Guys would go to all sorts of crazy extremes to show women how nice they were.
Can you imagine it?
Women rewarding men for how nice they are? Some nice guys who read this will want that world to exist, but it doesn’t.
In the world that you and live in (whether you and I like it or not), women want to have sex with guys who have the personality traits and behaviors that turn them on (e.g. confidence, charisma, masculinity, etc).
You can literally attract women in more than 100 different ways by displaying certain personality traits and behaviors that are naturally attractive to women.
Watch this video to understand how it works…
As you will discover from the video above, a woman’s attraction to a man works in a completely different way than most guys realize.
When you attract women in other ways (e.g. by being charismatic, charming, confident, funny, etc), she will then look at your physical appearance in a more positive light.
Even though a guy might not have male model features, she will look at him as being handsome, appealing and attractive because she is feeling a lot of attraction for him in other ways.
It’s weird, but that’s how attraction works.
If you don’t accept that now, you will eventually realize it and regret wasting more of your life thinking that you’re not good enough.
You are good enough for the majority of women on this planet. All you’ve got to do is be able to trigger their feelings of attraction by displaying the personality traits and behaviors that are naturally attractive to women.
3. He’s nervous and insecure around her.
Most women are attracted to emotionally strong men and are repelled by men who are emotionally weak.
An emotionally strong man will have a lot of confidence, self-esteem and belief in himself, whereas an emotionally weak man will be insecure and won’t be able to maintain his confidence when challenged (e.g. when a woman plays hard to get).
When a guy is confident in himself and his value to women and the world, he is not going to feel nervous or insecure around women; even if they are really beautiful.
He never thinks, “Wow! She’s so beautiful; she would never date a guy like me.”
Why? A confident guy will know that women are attracted to men for reasons other than looks or money. He will have seen that women are naturally attracted to his confidence, compared to how turned off they are by insecure guys.
On the other hand, when a guy is nervous and insecure, everything about his behavior says, “I don’t believe I’m good enough to have the woman I really want.”
A woman can easily sense when a guy doesn’t believe in himself and thinks that she is more valuable than he is. She will see it in his body language, notice it in his conversation style and pick up on it based on the way that he behaves when he’s around her.
4. He’s letting her dominate him.
Some guys assume that if they do whatever a woman wants to do and let her take the lead, she will be happy that she has total control over a guy and will then want to be in a relationship with him.
Yet, being a pushover like that is the fastest way to make sure that the woman doesn’t respect him. When a woman doesn’t respect a guy, she will find it very difficult to maintain any feelings of sexual attraction for him.
A woman wants to be with a masculine guy who can take the lead and allow her to be feminine. If a woman has to take on the masculine role around a guy, she won’t be able to relax and be a feminine woman, which is definitely not a turn on for her.
Although on the surface it might look like a woman wants to have total power and control over a guy, in reality, women don’t respect guys that they can easily push around.
A woman wants to be with a guy that she can look up to and respect, not a guy that she looks down on regrets hooking up with.
When You Make This Woman Feel Sexually Attracted to You, She Will Then Be Ready to Start a Relationship
If you’ve already made some of the above mistakes and she has given you the “I’m not ready for a relationship,” speech – don’t worry about it.
You can fix it and recover from the bad first impression that you’ve made on her.
You have not ruined your opportunity with her at all.
From now on, the main thing that you need to do is to start making her see you in a different light, by triggering her feelings of sexual attraction for you.
Attraction comes first and everything else (i.e. kissing, sex and a relationship) naturally follows on after that.
When you make her feel feminine and girly around you, it’s only natural that she will start seeing you differently because she will be feeling attracted to your masculinity.
Remember: You can make her feel attracted in more than 100 different ways by displaying certain personality traits and behaviors that women are naturally attracted to.
When you make her feel a lot of attraction for you, she will naturally change her mind about not being ready for a relationship.
She’ll go from saying she is not ready for a relationship, to coming on to you and trying to get you to kiss her or have sex with her.
You can change how she feels.
You really can do it.
From now on, you’ve just got to change the way that you’ve been approaching your interactions with her.
Focus on making her feel sexually attracted to you, rather than trying to get her to like you more as a friend or as a person.