Ending a relationship with your girlfriend can sometimes be a difficult decision to go through with, especially if you and her have shared true love and enjoyed many great times together.

Breakups can also be painful for both people, but that shouldn’t stop you from doing it if you feel it needs to be done.

Sometimes a breakup just needs to happen and will then be of benefit to you both in the long run.

It may be hard to see now, but if you honestly feel like she isn’t the right girl for you, then you will thank yourself in the future for having the guts to end it when you did.

If you don’t, who knows what might happen.

For example: What if you accidentally get her pregnant and then have to pay her child support for life, or have to live with her and raise the child, even though you’re not in love with her?

Not fun.

So, if you don’t feel like she’s the girl for you, here’s how to do it.

Breaking Up a Casual Dating Relationship

If you’ve only dated a girl a few times, haven’t met her family or friends and are simply involved in what would be considered a casual dating relationship, the breakup should be pretty simple.

Just tell her, “I think you’re great, but I just don’t think this is going to work out. I want us to stop seeing each other because I don’t want to lead you on, or for us to get more involved in a relationship that is most-likely going to end soon anyway. I wish you well and I’m sure you’re going to find a great guy who’s right for you.”

Keep it short and sweet.

If she really likes you, she might offer to give you some space for a while or to remain your friend.

Just tell her you think it’s best that you and her stop seeing each other and if your feelings change in the future, then you will call her.

If not, she should move on.

Breaking Up a Long-Term Relationship

Breaking up a long-term relationship is where things get tricky, especially if you want her friends and family to still like you.

You need to be direct about what you want (i.e. for you and her to break up completely), but tell her that you still love her and respect her.

Let her know that you’ve realized you and her aren’t a perfect match and you want to break the relationship up now, rather than living a lie.

Tell her that you’re willing to be seen as an asshole by her right now for breaking up the relationship, but you’re doing it because you feel like it’s the right thing to do.

The “We Can Stay Friends” Approach

Some guys try to use the, “We can remain friends” approach thinking that it will soften the blow.

Yet, it rarely works.

Offering to be her friend simply leaves the door open for a clingy woman to think that there is a chance of reconciliation if she just plays her cards right.

In cases like that, she will usually hope that you just need a short break from her and will want her back if she gives you space and takes on the role of a great friend.

So, if you want the relationship to be over, you need to make a clean break and be firm that you want out of the relationship for good.

You have to be clear and tell her, “I don’t want this to become a messy breakup for us both. I care about your feelings and mine and don’t want to give you the impression that I will change my mind.”

She might then accuse you of being selfish for breaking up with her like that and ask how you could be so cold, but really – you’re doing both you and her a favor.

If you’re not a compatible match, it’s better to make a clean break than to drag things on for months or years, which will often just be a waste of time for both of you and end up hurting both of you even more.

As I mentioned earlier, the last thing you want to do with a woman who isn’t right for you, is accidentally get her pregnant and then be stuck with her for life.

Additionally, there’s also the risk of you staying with her at her request, falling back in love with her and and then having her break up with you as a way of gaining emotional control over you, or getting revenge for attempting to break up with her.

If your gut instinct is telling you to break up with her, just do it.

Believe me, you will KNOW when you are truly in love with a woman.

When you are in a relationship with a woman that you truly want to be with, you will not be thinking about breaking up with her.

Breaking up will seem like the silliest, most irrelevant, unnecessary thing to ever do in the relationship.

So, if you have a persistent feeling that this girl isn’t for you, then she isn’t.

Don’t pretend to want to be her friend and don’t take on the role of her friend.

Doing so may lead you back into the relationship if you ever start to feel lonely because you’ve been unable attract new women.

Don’t Make Her Hate You

When a guy can’t work up the courage to break up with a woman on his own, he will sometimes begin to behave like an asshole to her.

He will treat her badly, make her feel like crap and hope that she breaks up with him because of it.

After helping countless guys to get their ex woman back, I have come across many cases where a guy wanted to break up with a girl, but then drove her away by being an asshole or rejecting her desire for him to commit to marriage, or to move in together.

Then, when the woman had enough of being treated that way and broke up with him, he struggled to pick up new women and then began to miss her.

She then had all the power and he started begging, pleading and offering the world to come back to him.

To avoid that type of messy outcome, just be a man about it.

Tell her that you love her, respect her and think she is beautiful, but you just don’t want to be in a relationship with her.

Tell her that you know deep down that you and her shouldn’t be together, even though you’ve had great times in the past.

Tell her that she will probably hate you for a while for breaking up with her, but she will likely end up appreciating you for breaking up a relationship that needed to end.

She may not be able to see that now because it hurts to get broken up with, but she will eventually see it.

Pick the Place

If you think she is going to behave badly (scream, cry, throw things, etc), you should likely pick a place that’s at least semi-public (restaurant, park, or any place where there are others around), so she’s less likely to go crazy and make a scene.

On the other hand, if she is normally composed, then choose a more private space to end it, but preferably not in your apartment because if she doesn’t want the breakup, it will probably take hours to get her out of your place.

If she has her own apartment, go there and do it so you can make a fairly easy exit after all is said and done.

Let Her Vent

You’re breaking up with her and chances are she’s going to have a few nasty things to say to you.

As long as she isn’t getting violent or overly crazed, let her get what she wants to say off her chest and hear her out.

She’ll probably tell you that you’re selfish, that she now hates you, that you’ll never find another woman like her, that you’re ugly and all those kinds of things.

That’s okay; she needs to vent and may simply try to make you feel insecure so you stick with her.

Just don’t take what she is saying seriously because she will be highly emotional and will probably say many horrible things to you in the heat of the moment.

When she’s had a chance to vent, you can say, “I’m sorry for making you feel upset. I understand if you want to see me as an asshole right now, but I do love you and care about you. I’m going to go now, so if you want to scream at me some more over the phone, I will answer your call and let you vent. If not, I will just hope that you’re happy without me.”

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