If you want to get your ex back now, you need to show her that you are the guy that she really wants to be with.
How can you do that? You need to begin sparking her feelings of respect and attraction for you.
To make her feel attracted to you again, you can focus on being confident and making her laugh and feel light-hearted whenever she interacts with you.
A lot of guys make the mistake of being too serious, concerned or nice when interacting with an ex. You’ve got to make sure that you’re triggering her feelings of attraction and using humor to make the dynamic between you feel more enjoyable and positive, is one of the ways that you can achieve that.
Don’t take what she says so seriously. Try to put a positive spin on things, make her laugh by making light of what she is saying and get her to see the brighter side of life. When she is smiling and feeling good, she is feeling attracted to you.
To make her feel respect for you again, you need to begin to truly change the things about you that really caused her to break up with you.
Often, a guy will get dumped by a woman because he hasn’t been enough of a man for her, so he needs to show her (via his body language, actions, vibe, conversation style and attitude) that he has already changed and become more of a man.
Watch this video for more info…
As you will discover from the video above, if your want to get your ex back now, you need to focus on making her feel the type of respect and attraction that she needs to feel to justify giving you another chance.
Are You and Her Now Finished Forever?
When a woman initially dumps a guy, it feels so permanent, but it isn’t.
Human emotions change all the time and you can actually make her change the way she feels by changing how you talk to her and how she perceives you. I’ve already helped hundreds of of guys get back with their ex-girlfriend, fiance or wife…it’s actually pretty easy.
You can get your ex back now as well, but you have to do it right and the right way to do it is to make her feel the emotions that will cause her to suddenly want to see you and be with you. That is something that I am ready to help you with right now.
Stop Using Lame Techniques That Don’t Work
Unfortunately, the majority of guys who ask me for advice on how to get an ex back have already tried and failed because they are either:
- Using crappy advice from amateur sites online (e.g. the No Contact Rule where a guy stops contacting his ex and hopes that it makes her miss him and forgive all of his mistakes).
- Listening to random people on forums, who are just as emotional and confused as they are about how to get an ex back.
- Reacting badly to the break up (e.g. begging, pleading, trying to convince her to take him back) and making turning her off even more.
Whatever the case for you, just make sure that from this moment onwards, you do it right.
If you keep ruining her feelings for you and driving her further away, it will make it difficult for you to get her back later. Not impossible, but difficult.
Remember: There is always a chance to get your ex back, if you do it right. One of the quickest ways to learn how to do it right is to learn from the mistakes made by those who do it wrong.
Don’t Beg and Plead With Her to Give You Another Chance
A common reaction from guys is to beg and plead to a woman to give them another chance.
A guy will promise her the world, tell her that he will “do anything” to get her back, change her mind or get another chance. As you may know now (possibly after begging and pleading to your ex), women do not find begging and pleading to be an attractive trait in a man and any kind of desperate behavior is a complete turn off.
Desperation makes a guy appear weak and insecure and that state of being in a man is unattractive to a woman. She literally stops feeling sexual attraction for the guy and the more he does it, the more respect she begins to lose for him. Eventually, she closes off the side of her that loved him and makes it unavailable to him.
A woman wants to feel like her man loves her and wants her in his life, but he would be happy with or without her.
A guy like that will accept the break up, go and fix his issues (e.g. insecurity) and improve himself (i.e. improve his ability to make her feel attracted to him) and then arrange to meet up with her so she can feel a renewed sense of respect and attraction for him.
However, when a guy falls into the trap of begging by saying things like, “I’ll do anything. Just tell me what it is you want and I’ll do it. I promise I can change,” then he’s not only making himself out to be an emotional wimp in his ex’s eyes, he’s also highlighting the fact that he doesn’t know what mistakes he made.
Why is this important? A woman doesn’t want to have to teach you how to be a man. She wants you to know what to do, instead of her feeling as though she has to “mother you” or “baby you” through the process.
She knows that unless you know what went wrong in your relationship, you’ll likely just keeping making the same mistakes and annoying her even further.
You can promise her the world to her, but it won’t mean anything to her because she doesn’t want to share her world with you if you don’t understand her and how to be the man she needs.
To get your ex back now, you need to be an emotionally and mentally strong man who is secure in who you are and what you’ve got to offer her. You need to be a man who knows what women want, without them having to spell it out for you.
Women don’t want to be your leader, your boss or your guide in life. If you need help and mentoring from other men, then get it, but don’t ever ask a woman to be your mentor. She does not want to take on that role.
Don’t Put Her On a Pedestal
Some guys get so caught up in the painful emotions of being rejected and broken up with that they begin to glorify the woman breaking up with them. A guy will say, “There’s no other woman that can compare to you” or, “Without you in my life, life is not worth living.”
Guys who do this make the mistake of thinking that proclaiming undying love for her and putting her on a pedestal will somehow flatter her into wanting him back. It won’t! In fact, it will have the opposite effect. Why?
Women do not want to be your purpose in life and they do not want to be told that without them, your life is worth nothing. That is what actors say in the movies for entertainment purposes, but in real life, women do not want men who are hopeless without them.
Women are not flattered when you glorify them by putting them on a pedestal above you. Using that approach will effectively throw a bucket of cold water over any residual feelings she had for you because it shows you to be a completely weak, insecure and desperate guy who has nothing going for him.
If your life is so empty and meaningless without her, you’re not the confident, masculine man she wants. She wants to be with a man who knows how to make her feel like a woman; being insecure and needy will not make her feel the way she wants to feel.
To get your ex back now, you need to use attraction techniques to make her feel sexually attracted to you again. When you use those techniques on her, she will know that you can make other women feel that way and she will worry about another girl taking her from you.
However, if she gets the impression that you want to get her back because you can’t attract other woman, it will make her want to be away from you even more.
Women (especially those in a position of breaking up with a guy), do not want to feel as though they are doing the guy a favor by being with him. A woman wants to be in a relationship with a man who make her feel attraction and whom she respects.
You’ve got to make her feel that way about you.
It’s the only real, proven way to get an ex back and I’ve already helped hundreds of guys to get their ex back that way via my program, Get Your Ex Back: Super System
Don’t Brag and Try to Make Her Jealous
Intentionally bragging about being with other women (or having other women interested in you) in a deliberate attempt to make your ex jealous is an approach that’s going to backfire, if you’ve actually been sitting alone at home feeling sorry for yourself.
Putting on any kind of act and pretending to be something you’re not is never a good move because women are experts at reading body language and she’s going to know you’re faking it. If she can’t tell by your body language, she will ask you to show text messages from the woman or might even say, “Fine. Be with her!” and then stick to that to see what you do.
One of the golden rules that we teach here at The Modern Man, is that you never need to lie to a woman. There is so much power in honesty and so much potential weakness in lying to someone.
Of course, if you really have been out socializing with other women and other women are showing an interest in you, she’s certainly going to begin questioning whether she made a mistake when she let you go.
It has to be real though. You can’t lie about hooking up with other women and think that it will get her back. If she finds out that you were lying, she will break up with you for good.
Doing it Right
To get your ex back now, you need to show her that you’ve learned from the experience of being dumped and that you’ve already taken action to become a better man. Telling her that you will change usually isn’t enough for most women. Instead, they want to see that you already have changed.
Are you willing to do whatever it takes to get your ex back now?
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In need of advice! I am 18 years old and I dated this girl nearly 2 years. We were both madly in love with each other and had a great relationship, towards the end it started to get a little rough with all the fighting. We ended up breaking up cause she was going away to college. I was referred to this site from a friend because I need help on what I should do. I would say I am a very good looking man with no problem with my confidence it’s just that I’m stuck on this girl because she was my first love. I can easily move on to many good looking women that want me but the thing is I do not want to loose this girl. I have had sex with two other women since her. The thing Is here friends I go to school with some how found out and told her. She confronted me about this and I lied saying nothing happened with either if the girls because I do not want to loose her. We still keep in contact every once and awhile. I know she still loves me cause she’ll call me to see how everything is going and I will do the same. The only thing is that every time we talk she asks if I have hooked up with any other girls. I always say no even If the answer is yes. Does this turn her off because it makes her feel like I need her? The reason being that I need advice on what to do is because since she is a little more advanced than me with sexual partners and is a little older. She tells me she wants me to go out and have sex with girls to experience other girls and not just her. She has also said that we will not be having sex if I’m having sex with other girls. But I still want to have sex with her because our sex is great but I also want to have sex with many other women at the same time. Now the thing is I’m confused because I don’t know if this is a trap for her to feel comfortable to hook up with guys in college, which I don’t want or for her to really just want me to kinda catch up… When she does ask if I have hooked up with other girls should I be honest? Should I lie? If she asks who they are do I tell her? Do I stay faithful even though we are not dating? What do I do because I do want to go out and have safe sexual relationships with hundreds of girls and be a master of the pick up game. The thing is in the future I can see myself with this girl getting married. We have discussed that we both want to do that in the future which is why I don’t want to loose her. A problem is that she has told me she knows that I’m scared to loose her because I have told her no other girls Is like her and all that garbage. So I know that makes me look weak. I SERIOUSLY NEED HELP! How can I fix this problem and make things to where I won’t loose her and still have fun? I would appreciate it if you got back to me as soon as possible. Thanks.
Thanks for your question.
Yes, you should tell her about the other women you’re sleeping with when she asks. She only says that she doesn’t want you to sleep with women because she can’t stand to feel the pain associated with that. However, you HAVE to make her feel that pain or else she isn’t going to want to get back with you.
You should watch my system http://store.themodernman.com/products/get_your_ex_back_super_system.html – there is a lot you need to learn, do and say if you want her back for real. You can try to work it all out yourself if you want, but there’s a reason why 1,000s of guys are learning from me. What is that reason? Getting an ex back is complicated! Most guys make ALL the same mistakes when trying to get an ex back and my system will help you avoid all that so you don’t ruin things further. It will also teach you how to get her crawling back to you and apologizing for breaking up with you in the first place.
Alot of these other websites regading “Getting Back Your Ex” say being friends etc will kill any chance of them seeing you as a guy/lover to come back to. Why is your approach different Dan in building a friendship with ex…?
Thanks for your question.
A friendship is not recommended. I explain what you need to do in this video: http://www.themodernman.com/videos/the-3-stages-she-went-through-before-breaking-up-with-you.html
Hey Dan I need advice. I’m 19 years old and the love of my life left me because she said she needs to “find herself” but I know it was an excuse. We’ve been together since we were 15, I saw her twice after she made her decision we had sex one of the times. But it seems like it does not matter what I say she won’t give in. What can I do to get her back?
Thanks for your question.
Usually, when a woman says that she has to “find herself” it is due to her being made to feel like the man in the relationship. You have either been behaving too feminine, making her wear the pants in the relationship or are hiding from your true potential as a man behind her and the relationship. In other words, she feels like she is being forced to be the leader for you and her, to protect you and guide you through life.
When a woman feels that way, she will become confused and usually say, “I need time to find myself.” She will know that something is wrong, but in most cases, she won’t know how to explain it or fix it.
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