Rebound relationship: The relationship that you have immediately after breaking up with your long-term girlfriend or wife.
Rebound relationships can work, but according to a number of studies, approximately 65% will fail within 6 months.
In most cases, this happens because the new person (the rebound) is simply filling in the gaps that the ex left wide open. However, just because the rebound is filling in those gaps, it doesn’t mean that they are a perfect match.
After spending years of my life helping guys to get a woman back after a break up, I’ve found that a lot guys get into a relationship by getting lucky and scoring with a woman as the rebound, but when the initial fun and excitement of the relationship wears off, they find themselves dumped.
Breaking up with a woman you truly love can be one of the toughest experiences to go through in life.
In a serious relationship, you will usually invest a lot of your time, energy and emotions trying to make it work.
Eventually, much of your life may revolve around her and big decisions that you used to make on your own when you were single, are now often made with her buy-in or with her interests in mind.
No matter what happened during the relationship, no matter how “good” or “bad” you were together and no matter what caused the breakup; when it is all over, you are usually left feeling battered and bruised.
If you’re like 65% of guys out there, the next relationship you get into (the rebound relationship will fail unless you put in some time and effort to learn from your mistakes in the relationship and become a better man.
If you don’t learn from your mistakes, you’ll probably meet a girl and she’ll seem like she’s great for you initially, but it just won’t work because she will eventually lose respect and attraction for you (like your ex did) and then fall out of love with you.
If you’re interested in learning from your mistakes after being dumped by a woman, watch this video…
As you will discover from the video above, a woman will usually go through 3 stages before breaking with a guy, whether he is a rebound or a man that she naturally fell in love with.
If you want your relationship with a woman to last a lifetime, you have to actively guide both you and her into deeper feelings of love, respect and attraction for each other.
It’s not a woman’s role to do that for you and if you don’t take on that role, most women (not all) will get sick and tired of being unhappy in the relationship and they will leave.
Two Reasons Why Most Rebound Relationships Fail
1. You and your new girlfriend were attracted to each other for the wrong reasons
If you are feeling insecure are emotionally weak after a break up, you will naturally attract women who feel comfortable around guys like that.
Women who accept insecure, emotionally weak men usually have low self-esteem and only feel safe being in a relationship with an emotionally weak man who needs her more than she needs him.
Trying to avoid the pain of being dumped by a man she really loves and wants, she will accept a man that she knows isn’t good enough for her at the time.
She figures, “If we break up, it won’t be a big deal because I’ll never truly love him anyway” and if he eventually dumps her, she won’t be too concerned because she was never truly attracted to him anyway.
The only way he will be able to get her back is to become emotionally strong and improve his ability to make her respect him as a man and feel attracted to him. If he tries to get her back from a place of emotional weakness, it just won’t work and here is why…
As you will discover from the video above, a woman will only be interested in taking you back if you can make her feel a renewed sense of respect and attraction for you.
If you were dumped for a rebound guy, read this: How to Get Your Ex Back When She Has Moved On
2. You’re not ready to go from one serious relationship to another
Going from one serious relationship to another is usually a big mistake because you need to learn from the previous experience.
If you have given yourself a chance to fix your issues (that caused or significantly contributed to the break up) and improve yourself (to be even more attractive to women and to be able to keep a relationship together), you will naturally bring all that baggage with you into the new relationship.
This will definitely lead to problems and once again, the relationship will fail within weeks, months or years.
Give Yourself a Chance to Heal, Learn and Grow From the Experience
Most rebound relationships are destined for failure because the guy is still going through the “break up” process mentally and emotionally.
He will either not be truly himself emotionally (usually to protect himself from getting hurt) or he will be a mess of emotions and turn the woman off. If he doesn’t give himself a chance to heal, learn and grow from the experience and instead jumps into a new relationship, he will most-likely fail in that relationship too.
To successfully keep a relationship together, you need to be the type of man that a woman wants to stay with and you also need to choose the type of woman that you will want to stay with, even when she starts getting older.
The healing process consists of several stages, which include the following:
He can’t admit that it’s over and keeps calling her trying to keep it together or get another chance, even though he knows that it’s over, or he is the one who broke up with her and still can’t believe she did whatever she did to make him break up with her.
He may think that all women are like her and that it’s all too difficult. Guys like this will swear to never want a woman or sex again and will say things like, “I don’t care. I’ll just stay alone. Women are all bitches and can’t be trusted.”
He feels angry about the break up and feels anger at his ex for leaving him or making him leave her. He could also be angry at whatever it was that caused the break up (her mother, friends, the guy she cheated with, etc.)
After the anger stage he may start to plead with her and promise that he will do whatever it takes to change; “I can change.” Alternatively he may bargain with himself “I will never date a woman like that again.”
Next he may feel that nothing will ever change for him and that he will be single and alone, forever. If he thinks like that on a regular basis, he will naturally begin to feel depressed.
He accepts that the relationship is over and that he will be okay. He is now ready to move on with his life and to move on to new and better relationships.
Fixing Yourself First
Grieving and taking some time to process what happened, where you went wrong and want you need to improve about yourself (to avoid it happening with the next woman) is a natural part of healing after a relationship break up.
After you fix your issues and improve yourself, it is important that you get out there and start having some fun with new woman.
If you’ve done it (fixing your issues and improving yourself) correctly, then you will be going out there with confidence and belief in yourself, which will naturally make women feel attraction for you.
However, if you go out there will a bunch of insecurities running through your head as you speak to women, the quality women will naturally be turned off by your emotional weakness.
Getting Your Mojo Back
When you and your woman finally part ways and you realize that you’re on your own, you may begin to feel a bit worried that she will be able to move on a lot quicker than you and you may not be able to find a woman like her ever again.
You may begin to doubt yourself and wonder if you have what it takes to approach and attract women out there in the dating scene.
The fastest way to get your mojo and confidence with women back is a two-step process:
- Fix your issues and improve yourself.
- Have sex with women who are hotter than your ex.
However, if you just want to get your ex back without having to hook up with new women, then I recommend that you watch and follow the steps from my program, Get Your Ex Back: Super System