When you’re going through a break up, most people will say, “Don’t worry, there are plenty more fish in the sea” or “better things are just around the corner.”
Yet, that doesn’t really help to fix the problem.
Yes, there are many other women out there, but what is the real secret of how to move on from a break up after losing a woman you love?
Essentially, you need to regain confidence in your ability to attract other women and then hook up with a woman who is more attractive to you than your ex-girlfriend.
Are you confident in your ability to attract a new, beautiful woman?
Watch this video to understand how a woman’s attraction for a man really works and how you can use it to move on from a break up, attract a beautiful woman and become an even better man than you are right now…
As you will discover from the video above, you can attract women in many different ways.
To be able to move on quickly, you need to have confidence in your ability to attract other women and then follow through on that by attracting and hooking up with a new, beautiful woman.
The Best Way to Move on
Most people will tell you, “Give it time. You will find a nice girl” or “Don’t worry…time heals all wounds. You will be fine.”
It’s very easy to say something like that, but it’s not as easy for a guy to live through the emotional pain of losing a woman and not being able to find a replacement woman who makes him feel like she did.
No matter what anyone else tells you, the best way to get on with your life is to have sex with another woman who, in your eyes, is more attractive than your ex.
Hearing that, you might be thinking, “Okay, that sounds good, but my confidence is at an all time low because of the break up, so I don’t see why a beautiful woman would want to sleep with me” or “Sounds great, but my ex broke up with me because I wasn’t good enough for her, so why would an even hotter woman be interested in me now?”
This problem is what I call the, “The Dumped Guy’s Dilemma” and it goes like this:
Women are mostly attracted to a guy’s confidence. Yet, a dumped guy usually has a lack of confidence around women due to the break up, so most women that he meets aren’t interested in him.
Feeling lost and desperate without his ex, he pines/yearns for her when he realizes that she was a great woman and it is going to be difficult for him to find another woman like her.
He might go out on dates with less attractive women (because that’s all he can get now due to his lack of confidence), which just reinforces his desire and need for his ex.
In this state, most women aren’t going to be as appealing as his ex. He’ll look at other women and triggers of pain and rejection will be set off in his mind, but when he thinks of his ex, he will feel safe and want to get back with her.
So, what is the solution?
You’ve got to rebuild your ability to trigger feelings of sexual attraction in the women you meet. If you don’t do that, you will likely go through the next few years of your life wondering why women don’t like you and coming up with all sorts of reasons and excuses why it might be happening.
Yet, it will all come down to one, simple thing, which is explained in this video…
Pitfalls to Avoid When Trying to Move on From a Break Up
The truth is, you can become the type of guy that other women really want to be with.
To quickly get to that point, make sure that you avoid the following classic pitfalls that cause a lot of guys to get stuck in years of depression and loneliness following a break up…
Pitfall #1: Focusing on all the positives of the ex-relationship
When I had to break up with my girlfriend a couple of years ago, it was one of the most difficult decisions I had to make in life.
She was perfect in almost every way except for the fact that she would lie to me sometimes.
She wanted to start a family with me and get married, but something in my gut told me to get out of the relationship. When I got the point of truly wanting to break up with her, I created a list of Pros and Cons (Positives and Negatives) about her.
There were so many positives (e.g. she was beautiful, we had amazing sex, she got along well with my friends, etc), but the negatives were enough to make me question whether I should truly commit to her (e.g. she lied sometimes, her parents weren’t nice people, she cheated on her ex boyfriend, etc).
To be able to break up with her and then move on after the break up, I had to consciously focus on the negatives and ignore the positives.
I didn’t want to start a family with a woman who had a history of telling lies to people. So, I dumped her.
The next night, I was having sex with a hot woman and then I went through a phase of dating multiple women at once until I finally met my new girlfriend who I am still with to this day.
Now, I can look back and see that it was a smart decision to break up with my ex. I have no doubt that her lack of integrity would have caused problems for us in the future.
My new girlfriend is squeaky clean. Not only is she a woman of integrity, but she is also beautiful, classy, sexy, cool, intelligent, down to Earth and comes from a good family.
So, if you want to be able to move on from your break up, make sure you don’t sit around thinking about all the positives traits of your ex girlfriend.
Make a list of her positives and negatives and have a good hard think about the negatives.
Not sure what to list as a positive or negative about her? Answer the following questions and you will:
- Is she trustworthy?
- Did she have habits that seemed cute at first, but then started to get on your nerves?
- Did she always treat you with respect?
- Did she always make you feel good about yourself, or did she “play games” and make you doubt yourself at times?
- What are the worst things about her character?
- What does she lack that you expect in a girlfriend?
When you switch your focus away from the positives, it probably won’t take you very long to come up a list of negatives.
From there, you will need to keep those negatives at the forefront of your mind until you feel like you’re happy to move on from that relationship and find a better woman.
Focusing on the positives will keep you stuck in the “good old days,” but if you believe that she wasn’t the right girl for you, try to remember that by staying focused on the negatives for now.
Later on, when you’ve moved on without her and are happy, you will then be able to look back on the positives without wanting her back.
Pitfall #2: Adopting a defeatist attitude
Asking, “Why would an even hotter woman be interested in me?” is a great example of a defeatist attitude.
If you adopt that type of attitude, you are expecting things to go wrong. Sure, your relationship broke up, but that doesn’t mean that other beautiful women won’t be interested in you.
Here’s the thing…
Women are attracted to confident men who believe in themselves and are turned off by insecure men who doubt themselves. So, if you’re thinking that women aren’t going to be interested in you, women will pick up on that and reject you because of it.
A big part of the process of how to move on from a break up is to ensure that you get rid of any defeatist or negative attitudes. A defeatist attitude will slow you down and make the recovery process longer and more painful to go through.