Okay, so there’s a woman that you really like and you want to start a sexual relationship with her, but you’re not sure if she feels the same way.
How can you find out if she likes you?
The Golden Rule
The Golden Rule is that if you have made a woman feel sexually attracted to you, then she will be interested in you.
The more attraction that you can make her feel for you, the more interested she will be.
- If she is not attracted to you, she isn’t going to be interested.
- If she is a little bit attracted to you, she will be a little bit interested.
- If she is very attracted to you, she will be very interested.
Yet, even when a woman is very attracted and interested in you, it doesn’t automatically mean that she is going to openly show that to you!
Not All Women Make it Completely Obvious When They Like You
Sometimes, a woman will stop talking to a guy to test his level of interest or to test his confidence level. She wants to see if he’s going to become nervous when she pulls back her interest or if he will lose interest in her. How interested is he and how confident is he when a woman plays a little bit hard to get?
Sometimes, a woman will talk to a guy and get him really interested in her, even when she has no plans at all to hook up with him sexually. Often, the woman will want to use the guy’s interest in her as a confidence booster; to make her feel better about herself, to improve her self-esteem or to look good in front of others.
Sometimes, a woman will want to avoid looking “too easy” to a guy. She will want him to be able to trust her in a relationship if they do end up hooking up, so she wants to show him that she’s not an easy target who gives herself up very easily. A woman like that will play hard to get and behave shy about the idea of going on a date, so the man can feel like he is getting a great woman that he will want to stay with.
What to Do if You Can’t Work Out Whether or Not She is Interested
Each woman will show her interest in a guy in a slightly different way. Sometimes, the woman will be challenging. Sometimes, the woman will be easy.
So, what should you do?
- Focus on making her feel attracted to you.
- Confidently attempt to escalate things to the next level (e.g. phone number, kiss, date or sex).
- As long as she keeps showing interest in talking to you and interacting with you, keep going with that until you get to the end result. Be the strong one for the both of you. Sometimes, the woman is shy or worried about being rejected and needs a guy who can be strong enough to deal with her issues.
Don’t waste time and energy worrying about whether not she is interested in you. Focus on making her feel attracted to you and she will be interested.
Waiting and Hoping For Obvious Signals
The main reason why you shouldn’t wait around hoping for obvious signals from her is that it can cause you to appear nervous, self-doubting or awkward around her. Those are behaviors and personality traits that turn a woman off.
Waiting for obvious signals from her may also cause you to act like a friend around her, because you’re worried about showing interest in her and being rejected. However, behaving or acting like a friend around her is not what causes a woman to feel sexually attracted to you.
What is Attraction and How Can You Make a Woman Feel Attracted to You?
The dictionary definition of attraction is:
Attraction (noun): A quality or feature of someone that evokes interest, liking or desire.
In my programs, I teach guys how to attract women in more than 100 different ways. An example of a way to attract a woman is by using humor, which is just one of the ways that you can attract women. You might have heard women say that they like a guy who can make them laugh.
Humor is one of the best ways to make women feel attracted to you. However, not all types of humor make women feel attracted to a guy. If a guy is just using a friendly and polite type of humor when talking to a woman, it is not going to make her feel attracted. The type of humor that makes a woman feel attracted is what I call, Playfully Arrogant Humor.
By using Playfully Arrogant Humor, you’re not being arrogant; you’re being playfully arrogant and that is what’s funny about it.
Just in case you’re feeling worried about the word “arrogant,” I want to point out that I’m talking about playfully arrogant humor, which is actually the type of humor that talk show hosts use.
Talk show hosts like Jimmy Fallon, Stephen Colbert, Johnny Carson, David Letterman, Jon Stewart, Arsenio Hall, Conon O’Brien and even women like Ellen Degeneres and Giuliana Rancic all use what I call, Playfully Arrogant Humor.
I’m going to give you a couple of examples of Playfully Arrogant Humor in a minute, but, before I do that let me just tell you something even more important about Playfully Arrogant Humor…
The reason why talk show hosts use Playfully Arrogant Humor is that it’s the type of humor that makes most people like you. The talk show hosts wouldn’t use that type of humor if it made most people hate them because no-one would watch their show.
When you use Playfully Arrogant Humor, it makes women feel attracted to you and it makes most people like you. So, don’t be afraid of the word “arrogant” and don’t be afraid to use Playfully Arrogant Humor; it’s one of the best things that you’ll ever do in life. It makes life so much more fun, it makes more people like you and it makes women feel attracted to you.
Most guys stick to polite and “safe” type of humor around women because they are offending women or saying something that might make the woman angry or annoyed. As a result of that “nice guy” approach, the guy ends up being very nice, polite and reserved around her…but, that isn’t what makes a woman feel attracted to a guy.
A guy who has the confidence, social intelligence and masculinity to be able to use Playfully Arrogant Humor is the sort of guy who is going to make her feel attracted. He’s also the guy who will make her feel really good because she’s going to be laughing and having a fun time interacting with him.
Two Examples of Using Playfully Arrogant Humor to Attract a Woman
Imagine that you’re talking to a woman you like and she touches you on the arm. How can you make her feel attracted to you by using Playfully Arrogant Humor?
When she touches you on the arm, look down at where she touched you and then look back up at her with a smile and say, “What’s with that? You’re a bit touchy-feeling today, aren’t you?”
By saying that with a smile, you’re being playfully arrogant. You’re not being an arrogant guy; you’re just joking around and pretending to be arrogant by assuming that she’s trying to seduce you and hit on you. That’s what is funny because most guys will never have the courage or social intelligence to react in that way.
Women feel attracted to a guy like that. Why? Using Playfully Arrogant Humor requires confidence and confidence is extremely attractive to women. It also requires you to think in a masculine way, where you are the man and she is the woman.
A lot of guys will interact with a woman and will put her in the more powerful position; they’ll put her in the position of dominance. The guy will try to do whatever he can (even if it means giving up his power and being a pushover around her) to hopefully impress her. Yet, behaving in that way is not what makes a woman feel turned on by a guy. Most women are turned on by guys who are the more masculine one, so she can then be free to feel girly and be the woman in the dynamic between them.
Another example of using Playfully Arrogant Humor when interacting with a woman you like, is while having drinks with her at a party, social function or at a bar.
Imagine that you’re out having drinks with the woman you like and she asks, “Do you want to get another drink?” Being the friendly, innocent, nice guy who isn’t going to make her feel any attraction, you would just say, “Sure, let’s get another drink” and miss out on a perfect opportunity to make her feel more attracted to you.
However, if you use what I call Playfully Arrogant Humor, you would smile and confidently say something like, “Another drink? You trying to get me drunk, are you?” It’s about her trying to hit on you. You’re being playfully arrogant about it and she’s going to find it funny and feel attracted to your confidence, masculinity, etc.
Her: Hey, do you want to get another drink?
You: What? You trying to get me drunk, are you?
What’s happening is that you’re suggesting that she’s trying to get you drunk so she can kiss you and sleep with you. She’s trying to take advantage of you.
It would be arrogant to go around thinking that any woman who suggests getting another drink, wants to sleep with you, but since you’re being playfully arrogant…that is what’s funny. It’s a funny joke in the moment. It’s not overly serious, it’s just a bit of fun.
You’ve got the confidence, the social intelligence and masculinity to say something risky like that, rather than being a boring, nice gentleman or a friendly guy who’s just pretending to be her friend and is acting nice and polite around her. Your using the moment to make her feel more attracted to you, rather than using the moment to pretend as though you just want to be friends.
There is a reason why talk show hosts use that type of humor: It makes people laugh hard and really like them. Don’t be afraid of it. Embrace the opportunity to make her feel attracted to you.
Using Playfully Arrogant Humor
To make it clear about how using this type of humor makes a woman feel attracted to you, have a look at the dictionary definition of attraction.
Attraction (noun): A quality or feature of someone that evokes interest, liking or desire.
There are many different qualities and features that you can present to women that make them feel naturally attracted to you. Using humor is just one of those qualities.
How does Playfully Arrogant Humor make her feel attracted to you? You are presenting traits (features or qualities) that naturally attract women, such as: Confidence, masculinity, the ability to make her laugh and social intelligence.
If you just use polite, guarded, reserved, nice guy type of humor, it doesn’t make her feel attracted to you because you’re not displaying a lot of confidence and you’re not displaying masculinity.
If you’re too afraid to use Playfully Arrogant Humor with women, then you’re most likely in the mindset where you feel like you need to be nice to women to get them to like you and then hopefully get a chance with them.
To successfully pick women up and have your choice of women, you’ve got to be the sort of guy who makes women feel attracted to you, not just like you as a person because you’re such a good guy. There’s nothing wrong with being a good guy, but you’ve got to be the sort of good guy who also makes women feel attracted to you.
Making women see you as a friendly, nice, innocent guy isn’t what makes them feel sexually turned on. However, when you display many traits that naturally attract women (e.g. confidence, masculinity, social intelligence, etc), it will attract her to you and turn her on.
Confidence, masculinity and social intelligence are not the only traits that you can display. I teach more than 100 different ways that guys can naturally attract women. Attracting women is actually a very simple and easy thing to do, once you understand it.
You don’t have to become a bad boy or a jerk or do things that are rude or mean to women to attract them. However, you do need to display personality traits and behaviors that are going to naturally attract women to you. My approach to women is about being a good guy, but being a good guy who is also attractive to women. That is the big difference.
Instead of wasting time thinking about whether or not a woman is interested in you, what you need to do is focus on making her feel attracted to you. The more ways that you can make a woman feel attracted to you, the more interested she is going to be in you.
Once attracted to a guy, each woman will show her interest in a guy in a slightly different way. Some women will play hard to get. Some women will make it easy. So, what you need to do is simply focus on making her feel attracted and then confidently move things forward.
If she gives you an absolute, “No! Go away! Leave me alone” response then you know that she’s not attracted to you and she’s not interested in you. However, if she keeps trying to talk to you, is open to talking to you and is open to interacting with you, then it means that you have an opportunity to make her feel even more attracted to you.
The more attracted you can make her feel, the more interested she’s going to be in you.
Use The Flow to Make Her Your Girlfriend Now, Before You Miss Out on Your Opportunity With Her
If there’s a woman that you really like and you want to make her feel sexually attracted to you, I welcome you to try the proven techniques from my book, The Flow.
When you use The Flow on this woman you like, the dynamic between you and her will instantly change because she will feel attracted to you in so many different ways.
There are so many different ways to make women feel attracted to you and in The Flow, for example, I explain and provide examples of the 9 personality traits that naturally attract women. The ability to use humor and make her laugh is one of those traits.
In The Flow, you will find so many examples of how to use Playfully Arrogant Humor when you approach women, when you start talking to them, when you’re a few minutes into the conversation, when you’re getting to know her, when you’re on a date, when you’re calling her up and when you’re in a relationship.
There are so many different examples for you, so know how to make a woman feel attracted to you in any moment and you also know how to make her feel really good around you. She enjoys interacting with you, she wants to be around you and she wants to be with you.
As you read through The Flow, you will discover so many different examples of how you can make this woman that you like feel really attracted to you and want to be with you.
You can actually make her feel excited about the idea of being with you. You can make her feel turned on while interacting with you. It’s very easy to do and women love to be in the presence of a guy who has the ability to make them feel that way.
“Is She Interested in Me?”
Wasting time worrying about whether or not she’s interested in you, is the wrong approach to use with a woman.
What you need to do is make her feel attracted to you. When she is attracted to you, she’s going to be interested in you. The more attracted you can make her feel, the more interested she is going to be.
In The Flow, I also explain how to go from just talking to her and getting her attracted to you, to a phone number, to kiss, to sex and starting a relationship. You simply go through the flow with her. Things flow from one step the next. That is how it works. It’s very natural and easy to do.
It’s not like being the friend, hanging around her and hoping that something develops over time. When you know how to attract women, you can do it very quickly during a brief interaction. You may have noticed that when some other guys interact with women, they are able to create instant sexual chemistry between themselves and the woman.
You can do that too.
It’s actually a skill that you can learn.
Getting Out of the Friend Zone and Into a Relationship With Her
If you want to get out of the friend zone with the woman you like and you want to start a relationship with her, I welcome you to read my book, The Flow. When you start using the techniques from The Flow, she will feel attracted to you, she will be excited to hook up with you and you’ll start a relationship with her.
It’s actually very simple to do.
It’s not rocket science.
It’s very natural for a man and a woman who feel attracted to each other to hook up and start a sexual relationship. However, if you’re not making this woman feel attracted to you, it won’t make any sense to her to want to start a sexual relationship with you. It will only make sense to stay friends.
When you attract a woman, it’s only natural that things can then change from being friendly to sexual. If you want to make it happen with the woman you like, I welcome you to read my book The Flow and put it into action. I hope to see you post up a success story on the site soon!
Want to Know the SECRET to Success With Women?
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Mine it’s not a comment but a problem…There is this girl i love,i only one’s saw her in a programme and i fall for her.I got her username and we do chat,i told her how am feeling about her but she refuse.Alot of times i would invite her for a date but she never turn out…Please Mr Dan,i need your advice on what i should to make this girl to have a date with me,because i believe in just a single date,i will win her heart.Thanks…
Thanks for your question.
Ahh, you made the classic mistake of telling a woman your feelings too soon. Watch this: http://www.themodernman.com/blog/should-you-tell-a-woman-that-you-have-feelings-for-her.html
How to recover from the first bad impression? Watch this: http://www.themodernman.com/blog/how-to-recover-from-a-bad-first-impression-youve-made-on-a-woman.html
Dan dude is this the only type of humour that turns on women? Or does it not matter end of the day as long as you take some risks and say some stuff that gets a laugh its all good in the hood. I know you only gave two examples out the hat but it seems like playfully arrogant humour is mainly about sexual innuendos or teasing.
Thanks for your question.
Humor that takes some playful risks is attractive to women because it shows confidence, so you are essentially talking about the same type of humor. However, the type of humor that attracts women the most is where you are showing confidence in yourself and your sex appeal to her. That doesn’t mean using sexual innuendos all the time though.
Most of the humor I teach in my programs (not in the free stuff on the site) is more subtle and isn’t directly about sex, but it gets the woman feeling sexually attracted to you.
BTW: If using humor like this feels a bit new to you, just know this: As you go through life, you will grow and develop as a person. Who you are right now is not the end of the story. You will develop a more complex personality over time, so don’t be worried about adding to who you are – it’s going to happen now or later in life.
Right now, if you are single or unsuccessful with women, the thing to do is add things to your personality, conversation style and behavior that are going to ATTRACT women. It’s not about changing your inner self or letting go of your old self, but it is instead about rapidly growing and becoming a more attractive man to women NOW, rather than leaving it until it’s too late.
Hello Dan, I’m glad to have found The Modern Man. It has brought a great developement to my approaches to women. I still long to know more cos I haven’t gotten the real attractive woman I want. I often ruin things with my conversation style. I think I need to get the book ‘The Flow’. But I can’t afford the cost. Any price reduction? Please!
Thanks for your positive feedback. I’m glad we have crossed paths also. I look forward to guiding you to total success with women.
About the price of The Flow: It’s already discounted at the moment! I really should be charging a lot more for it (it saves guys years of pain and frustration and gives them all the answers), but I keep the price low enough to allow most guys to afford it. I hope you can put in the effort to save up enough money for it. Believe me, it’s more than worth it and you will know that once you read it and begin using the advice in your life.
What’s the difference between a normal guy going through the flow with a woman and an alpha male guy using it? I mean I know she’s gonna be more attracted to the latter obviously.. but I’m just a regular kind of guy, I’ve never been the loud one of the group or had that sort of high status in a group of friends, social group, etc.
Thanks for your question.
Good question. A lot of guys assume that being an alpha male means being loud, obnoxious, bossy or mean. Yes, there are alpha males who behave that way, but the majority don’t. What I teach is how to be a good guy alpha male. In other words, you’re confident, strong (mentally and emotionally) and you’re a good guy.
Having high status around other people also doesn’t mean that you have to put other people down, look down on others or be selfish with attention in groups. High status is a state of mind. At The Modern Man, we teach what we call “Relaxed Confidence” which means that you don’t need to go around boasting or showing off. It’s just a relaxed, easy-going, self-assured belief in yourself.
If you allow yourself to have that belief in yourself, most of the people you meet in life will simply accept it and see you as a guy who has high status in social situations. However, if you go through life not allowing yourself to feel worthy, most of the people you meet in life will accept that too and see you as a guy who has low status in social situations.
Being alpha is a state of mind. It can be communicated in through your body language, behavior, actions, vibe and conversation. All of our programs include examples of how to be a good guy alpha male. It’s a complex thing that a guy either knows how to do or doesn’t:
Well don,i really appreciate the good job,the fact that women are so complicated and you find a manual for them I think you are the boss,i am in Jamaica and I read your emails a lot sorry I can’t really buy your books yet but these articles work.
Thanks for your sign of appreciation brother.
I’m glad the articles are helping out. More coming soon!
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