Pleasing a woman in bed is easy, as long as you don’t worry too much about it and just do whatever you feel like doing at the time.
Having that type of confidence in yourself and the balls to do whatever you want is what impresses women the most.
Women don’t need you to be superman in the bedroom and do all sorts of new and amazing things every time. Instead, most women just need you to be confident, present and willing to do whatever you want with her without worrying so much about it.
I know this because I’ve had sex with more than 250 women and I’m now a very happily married man with a sexy young wife.
One of the main things that women have always enjoyed about being in the bedroom with me is that I am right there with her, rather than being all up in my head due to over-thinking things or being insecure.
I have the confidence to just there being masculine, loving her, appreciating her, devouring her and doing whatever I want.
If you can do that in the bedroom, I assure you that you won’t ever be a disappointment to a woman again.
5 Things That Women Want in Bed
As long as you get these 5 fundamentals right, you really don’t have to worry about your performance in the bedroom because you will already be more than good enough for most women.
The first thing that a woman wants to experience in bed is…
1. To feel sexy in your eyes
Making a woman feel sexy is extremely important whether you are having sex with her for the first time or are deep into a long term relationship or marriage.
To make her feel sexy, simply look at her, talk to her and touch her in way where you are unapologetic and unashamed of your ravenous attraction for her.
Try to think about it from her perspective…
She knows that the most attractive thing to a man is a woman’s appearance, so if a man doesn’t really make it obvious that he finds her to be physically attractive, she will naturally question herself and feel a bit insecure.
On the other hand, if she can see, hear and feel the man’s attraction for her (e.g. by the way he is touching her, looking at her, the sounds he makes when he touches her or looks at her), it will allow her to relax and enjoy herself rather than having to worry about whether or not she looks good enough.
A man can also make a woman feel sexy and desirable by what he says to her in the bedroom when leading up to sex or during sex.
For example: You might say, “Wow, look at you…you’re so damn sexy” or “I find everything about you to be sexy, especially your body and your pretty face.”
Making a woman feel sexy in your eyes allows her to relax into just feeling her emotions and enjoying the experience, rather than having to think or worry about things.
If a woman is feeling insecure (e.g. she’s worried about the little bit of extra weight on her stomach, her butt, her thighs, the fact that she isn’t wearing make up), then she will find it more difficult to surrender to her emotions and lose herself in the moment so she can then orgasm or simply enjoy the experience.
2. To feel your presence and attention
It’s a huge turn on for a woman when a man has the balls to be present in the moment where he focuses his attention on her and his attraction for her, rather than being all up in his head and worrying about his performance.
If you can just turn off your thoughts or disconnect from your thoughts to allow yourself to be present in the moment and put your attention on her, it will turn her on because she will feel like she’s under the spotlight of your masculine attention.
When she feels like you are present and focused on her, it automatically flicks a switch in her mind where she feels more feminine and submissive, which turns her on at a deep and primal level.
She can then relax into your masculine direction and surrender herself emotionally so she can fall deep into mental and emotional pleasure, which will then either lead to orgasm or enhanced physical pleasure.
3. To feel feminine in comparison to how masculine you are being
You don’t always have to be super masculine or dominant, but simply add that stuff in sometimes.
Likewise, being more masculine in the bedroom doesn’t mean that you have to go to extremes with an aggressive masculine approach (e.g. choking, slapping, hitting, whipping). If you and a woman are into that sort of thing, then go ahead and do it because it will be enjoyable for both of you.
However, most guys won’t ever need to do go to that extreme because the majority of women don’t want things to get too rough or aggressive in the bedroom anyway.
Instead, most women just want a guy to be masculine in the way he approaches sex, rather than being neutral (e.g. holding back from doing things, being more like a nice friend rather than being her man and allowing her to be his woman, suppressing his masculinity because he’s worried that she might not like it).
Some guys even go as far as being a bit feminine in the way that they use their body language and the sounds they make during sex, which is a huge turn off for a woman who wants to feel feminine (95% of women).
If you want to please a woman in bed, you must remember that the most fundamental thing that women are attracted to about is masculinity, not femininity or neutrality.
It is the difference between a woman’s femininity and a man’s masculinity that creates and maintains a spark of sexual attraction and desire.
Women are programmed to feel naturally attracted to your masculinity whether they act like they don’t like it or not.
Some women will say, “Why are you bending me over? I don’t want to bend over” or “Why are you pushing on me like that? Why aren’t you more gentle with me?” but in almost all cases, the woman is simply testing to see if you will remain masculine, or if you will crumble under pressure and assume that she is more dominant than you.
If you just laugh (in a loving way, not a demeaning way) and continue on, she will be moaning and enjoying it seconds later.
However, if you crumble and say, “Sorry. Okay, what do you want me to do?” she will feel turned off at a deep level because you lack the ability to be masculine during a simple test like that.
So, regardless of whether a woman puts on an act of wanting to you to be a soft, gentle wimp in the bedroom, just know that what she really wants is for you ignore her tests and just embrace your role as a man of being the more dominant one.
4. To feel properly turned on by you
Men and women get turned on for different reasons, so if you want to please a woman in bed, you must understand and accept that.
For example: Once a man has an erection and he slides it into a woman, it’s pretty for him to happily bang away until he gets to the point of ejaculation.
He will then experience an orgasm, feel relieved and then relax and just enjoy the after effects.
Yet, unless a woman is highly orgasmic, she will need to be properly turned on by you in the lead up to sex or during sex to get to the point where she can have an orgasm.
Getting a woman properly turned on prior to sex does not require you to have loads of foreplay, lick her out every time or kiss for 5 or 10 minutes.
You can do that stuff sometimes when you want to, but you can also get a woman properly turned on before sex by simply doing the fundamental things that I’ve outlined so far in this post.
Some examples of how to get her turned on prior to sex or during sex:
- Display masculinity in how you think, talk, feel, behave and take action.
- Touch her, hug her or grope her in a masculine way.
- Let her feel your presence and feel like she is under the spotlight of your masculine attention.
- Be patient during sex and mix things up by going fast and banging away and then going slow and letting her experience your presence.
When you do that for a woman, she will naturally begin to have all sorts of sexy and naughty thoughts about you in her mind, which will make everything else that you’re doing feel so much better to her.
5. To experience some variety
Most women don’t expect loads of variety when it comes to sex and they are more than happy with just some variety.
This applies whether you are having sex with a woman for the first time, during the dating phase or deep into a relationship or marriage.
Some women are mad about sex and want loads of variety and to do all sorts of weird stuff, but the majority of women are just fine to have sex with a man who they respect, feel attracted to and feel in love with.
Each couple will require a different level of variety, which is something that you will need to judge for yourself and your woman.
For example: A perfectly happy couple might have slowly gotten into a routine of having sex in bed a couple of nights per week just before heading off to sleep.
It might then become boring and too predictable for the woman or for both of them, so to break the routine by adding in some variety, they could have some drinks on a Friday or Saturday night before going to bed to make things a bit more fun.
Another example is with a couple that normally starts of their sex routine by the woman getting the man erect by jerking him off.
Over time, that might become a boring process to go through, so every now and again the man simply needs to start by giving her oral sex or by slow kissing for a 30 seconds to a minute so they both get into the mood.
Variety can also be the style of sex that a couple has.
For example: There’s nothing wrong with having a quickie every now and then where you just get in there and bang away until you finish, without worrying about getting her turned on or giving her an orgasm.
That is totally fine as long as there is also some variety where you sometimes take your time while having sex with her, or you have some drunken love or start with kissing or fondling type of foreplay where you are rushing to get the job done.
Pleasing a Woman in Bed
As long as you do the 5 fundamentals that I’ve outlined in this post, a woman will almost always feel more than satisfied with her sex life with you.
Don’t feel pressured by the things that you might read in online magazines where some random writer says that you must tie a woman up, give her anal, make her squirt and give her mind-blowing orgasms every time otherwise she will leave you.
If you and her want to get into those things because it interests you, then go ahead and do it. Both of you will enjoy it because it’s what you want to do.
However, the point of my post here is to let guys know that you always don’t have to extremes to give a woman what she wants in bed.
As long as you add in some variety and you are confident enough to experiment with things that match you and your woman, then everything will be fine.