Winning back your ex is no different to winning at anything else in life.
To be a winner, you need to beat the competition. Right now, she is looking at other guys as being a better option than you, but you can change how she feels about that.
She will reconnect with her feelings for you and begin to see you as being other guys if you can…
1. Get her respect back
The most important part of winning back your ex begins with getting her to feel respect for you again.
For example: If a woman dumped a guy because he was too insecure, she’s not going to take him seriously anymore unless he can show her (i.e. by talking to her on a phone call and meeting up with her in person) that he really has changed.
It’s not enough for a guy to say, “I promise that I will change if you just give me a chance.” Those are just mere words and when a relationship has broken up, most women aren’t willing to just accept that and get back together.
Some women do initially accept it (e.g if she is inexperienced with relationships or still really loves her guy and wants to make it work), but most women know that if a guy says that he will change, it’s not the same as him actually changing, improving and truly fixing his issues.
So, how would a guy convey that he is no longer insecure when he talks to his ex over the phone or in person?
On the phone, it will come through via his tonality, attitude, conversation style and how he reacts to what she says or does on the call.
In person, it will come through via his tonality, attitude, conversation style, body language, vibe, behavior and how he reacts and responds to what she says and does.
If you’re unsure how to handle yourself on a phone call or at an in-person meet up with your ex to get her respect back, all of the examples of what to say and do are provided in my program, Get Your Ex Back: Super System
2. Get her to feel attracted to you again
Once your ex feels that she can respect you again, she will automatically become open to feeling attracted to you again.
For example: If you are being confident and getting her smiling and laughing, she will feel attracted to you because of that.
Watch this video to understand how a woman’s attraction for a man works and how you can use the power of attraction to win back your ex…
As you will discover from the video above, you have a lot of direct control over how much attraction your ex feels for you.
For example: If a guy meets up with his ex girlfriend, fiancé or wife and he is feeling nervous, insecure and unsure of himself, he will naturally be turning her off.
Why? Women are naturally attracted to the emotional strength in men (e.g. confidence, high self-esteem) and turned off by the weakness (e.g. insecurity, low self-esteem).
If you don’t feel like you will be confident enough to reattract your ex, I recommend that you go through the emotional transformation process provided in my program, Get Your Ex Back: Super System
After going through the full 10 hours of video from the program, most guys are ready to contact their ex, get her respect back on the phone, begin reattracting her and secure a meet up.
Some guys need to give themselves a couple more days to get to a place of emotional strength, but most guys are ready to meet up with their ex and get her to feel a renewed sense of respect and attraction for them.
3. Get her to reconnect with her love for you
If a woman doesn’t respect a guy, she won’t be able to feel proper attraction for him and when in a relationship, she will then begin to fall out of love with him.
So, when you get your ex to feel a strong, renewed sense of respect and attraction for you, she will naturally and automatically begin to reconnect with her old feelings of love for you.
When that happens, she will be able to look back at the problems in the relationship with a more light-hearted, forgiving perspective where it’s no longer such a big deal because you really have changed.
What to Say to Begin Winning Back Your Ex
The fact that she’s now your ex suggests that you’ve already won her love in the past, but have now lost it.
So, part of the process involved in winning her back is to understand what really went wrong and what what caused her to fall out of love with you and choose to end the relationship.
If you are trying to win her back, but you don’t really, truly know what she wants, then most of your efforts will be ignored and she might even see it as annoying that you’re still trying to get her back even though you don’t even understand what she really needs you to change.
For example: Sometimes a guy will get dumped by a woman because his approach to love is too insecure (e.g. he needs her to continually reassure him of her love and devotion, he is too protective, etc).
If he tries to win her back by declaring his undying love for her and saying that he will do anything to make her happy, she might appreciate it, but she’s going to feel annoyed and turned off by the fact that he’s not directly addressing her main problems with him.
She would be much more impressed and respectful of him if he could relax, smile and say in a light-hearted way, “I get it now. I was being too insecure with you. It was silly. I look back on it now and I laugh at how immature I was being, but I’m happy that the insecurity is now a thing of the past. I’m obviously not like that anymore, but I get it that you probably don’t want to believe me right now. You probably think I still haven’t changed, right?”
Then, let her explain herself and take it from there.
For example, if she said, “I don’t know…” then he can say, “Well, I know. I know that I was being silly before. That’s what often happens when a guy loves a woman so much, but just didn’t know how else to express it. I know now that I should have just relaxed and let us love each other, rather than being such an insecure idiot.”
She will then be able to see that he does get it and that he really has begun to change, or already has changed.
Of course, the conversation that you have when winning your ex back will need to be tailored to you and your relationship problems with her.
In my program, Get Your Ex Back: Super System, I provide examples of what to say that get any woman to relax, begin to forgive her ex and open back up to him. So, if you need that kind of help, I recommend that you begin watching my program right away and follow the steps until win her back.
Being a Man That She Can Look Up to and Respect
A very important part of winning back your ex is allowing her to see that you are now the sort of guy that she can look up to and respect.
To help you understand more about getting a woman to look up to you and respect you when in a relationship, here are some examples…
1. Leading the Way
Many guys make the mistake of thinking that a woman will be happier if she gets to wear the pants or lead the way in a relationship.
Modern women may be independent and may even go around saying that they can do anything that a man can, but they are still instinctively attracted to and respect of a man who takes on the alpha role in a relationship.
Taking on the alpha role doesn’t mean being overly domineering, controlling her, bossing her around, making all the decisions all the time or anything like that. It’s simply about being the emotionally stronger one who takes on the role of leading the way to a better life for you and her.
It’s fine if she makes decisions at times or even takes the lead, but for the most part, she wants to see that you are leading the way and there is an opportunity for her to relax into feeling like a real woman.
Regardless of what the unhappy, feminist women on TV shows like The View say, what makes a woman feel like a real woman around a man is when he is more masculine than her.
When a man is more masculine in the way he thinks, feels, behaves and takes action in life, it allows a woman to relax into thinking, feeling, behaving and taking action like a feminine woman.
In other words, she has the opportunity to be girly, get emotional, focus on the love she feels for you, put time and effort into looking pretty and so on.
This doesn’t mean that she can’t follow through on her career dreams or anything like that. It just means that she can feel girly and feminine while she is doing it, which is what women really want to feel like.
Some guys just don’t understand that about women, so in a relationship, a guy will essentially let the woman take control, boss him around or make decisions about most things.
When she breaks up with him, he will continue to put her in control by saying things like, “Just tell me what you want me to do, I’ll do anything, just give me another chance,” not knowing that he is turning her off in the exact same way that caused her to want to break up with him in the first place.
She doesn’t want to have to teach him how to be the man she needs. She wants a ready-made man who already understands what it takes to be the man in a relationship, rather than having to guide him and teach him.
If she has to teach him, she won’t feel like a feminine, girly woman in comparison to him. Instead, she will like a mother figure, big sister, friend or teacher.
To win back your ex, you need to show her that you now have the ability to be masculine in a way that makes her feel feminine. She needs to be able to see that she can relax and trust that you really are the man now.
When she sees that, she will begin to respect you again and when that happens, she will become open to feeling attracted to you again. When that happens, she will naturally begin to reconnect with her old feelings of love for you.
2. Appreciating her
For a relationship to last a lifetime, mutual love and appreciation must be deepened over time, rather than falling into the trap of taking each other for granted.
Some guys are excellent at showing a woman how much they care during the dating phase of the relationship, but after the first year or so, many guys begin to take their woman’s love and devotion for granted.
For example: He might begin to pick on her privately or in front of other people, he might become mean and selfish or he might come to expect that she has to serve him and do whatever he wants now that they are in a relationship.
Some women will put up with that type of treatment for a while, but when she has had enough of being treated like crap, she will eventually begin to open herself up to meeting other guys or developing feelings for nice, sweet guys (e.g. at work or university) who treat her well and give her lots of compliments.
To win an ex back in cases like this, a guy needs to be able to fully understand where he messed up with her, improve his relationship skills (or relationship intelligence) and then communicate to her with his new, more mature and loving perspective.
For example, he might say, “I now know that I didn’t love you the way that you deserved. I was too selfish and cared too much about what I needed, rather than giving you the appreciation you deserved. Of course, we are broken up now, but I do want you to know that I am sorry for being such an asshole. Although you might not care because you hate me right now, I just want you to know that I’m no longer that immature guy who wasn’t man enough to love you the way you wanted and needed. I’m sorry for that.”
In most cases, that will begin to get a woman’s respect back. It’s not the only thing that needs to be done though.
As explained earlier, you need to get a woman’s respect back and then she will begin to allow herself to feel attracted to you again. When that happens, she will begin to reconnect with her feelings of love and will be much more willing to give the relationship another chance, or at least meet up with you and see how she feels.
What is Your Plan to Win Back Your Ex?
The process of winning back an ex is confusing for most men.
I’ve literally spoken to successful businessman, pilots, lawyers, doctors and other very intelligent, successful men who had no idea what to say or do to get their ex girlfriend, fiancé or wife back.
So, if you are unsure about how to go about winning back your ex, don’t feel as though it’s only you who is feeling lost about what you should do. Most guys have no idea what to do and it’s so easy to make classic mistakes that push your ex away even further.
If you are serious about getting her back, I recommend that you use my proven to work system, Get Your Ex Back: Super System and I’ll guide you through the exciting process of winning her back.