In this video, Dan Bacon addresses the common scenario where a woman plays hard to get when a man is interested in her. He explores the various reasons why women exhibit this behavior and offers insights into how men can handle it effectively.
Dan starts by emphasizing that this situation applies when you’ve met a woman you’re highly attracted to, both physically and personality-wise. However, she begins to display signs of playing hard to get. Rather than immediately walking away from such a situation, Dan explains how men can navigate it to ultimately achieve their dating or relationship goals.
He proceeds to list several reasons why women may play hard to get:
- Insecurity: Some women use this tactic to boost their self-confidence by seeing if a man remains interested despite her initial disinterest. Sometimes a woman will do that by talking about other guys who like her, to see if he remains interested.
- Testing Your Interest: Women want to know if a man is genuinely attracted to them and not just seeking a casual fling.
- Evaluating Your Character: They want to observe how you react when faced with resistance, testing if you remain true to your persona, be it a “nice guy” or a “bad boy.” Sometimes a woman will talk about other guys who like to her, to see if you become angry, overly-protective, insecure, etc.
- Assessing Relationship Dynamics: Women may be testing whether you’re the type of guy who chases or if the relationship will be balanced.
- Testing Your Ability to Handle Challenges: They want to know if you can remain confident and composed when things get a little difficult.
- Seeking Appreciation: Playing hard to get can make you appreciate her more, seeing her as a special and unique individual.
- Avoiding Casual Hookups: Some women want to demonstrate that they are not easy to hook up with and can control their emotions.
- Awkwardness in Expressing Feelings: Some women find it challenging to express their interest openly and resort to playing it cool instead.
- Avoiding Previous Mistakes: They might have experienced men losing interest when they showed too much interest too quickly.
- Gaining Power: After being in a relationship where they felt powerless, they may want to regain control and rebuild self-esteem.
- Not Ready for Commitment: Some women may not be looking for a committed relationship at the moment, while others are but fear appearing too eager.
Dan then emphasizes the importance of having independent confidence rather than dependent confidence. Independent confidence means feeling self-assured regardless of how a woman behaves, while dependent confidence relies on her actions to validate one’s confidence.
He provides examples of how to apply independent confidence in different dating scenarios, such as texting or going on a date. Dan encourages men to maintain their confidence and not lose it if a woman plays hard to get, highlighting that women are often attracted to men who exude this kind of self-assurance.
In conclusion, Dan Bacon advises viewers to focus on building independent confidence, allowing them to handle situations where a woman plays hard to get with composure and attract women who may initially seem difficult. He also recommends reading his ebook, The Flow for comprehensive guidance how to attract women for dates, sex and relationships.
Watch All 11 Videos
- Part 1: What do you say to a woman after the conversation starter?
- Part 2: How do you overcome the initial fear of rejection when you want to approach a woman or ask her out?
- Part 3: How do you get out of the friend zone with a woman and start dating/having sex with her instead?
- Part 4: Why do women always go for bad boys?
- Part 5: Why do women play hard to get, especially after you’ve shown them that you’re interested?
- Part 6: How do I get the confidence to approach women?
- Part 7: Why does she always talk about other guys who like her?
- Part 8: How do I tell a woman that I have feelings for her?
- Part 9: How do you approach women during the day? (Bookstores, malls, etc)
- Part 10: Can I recover from a bad first impression I made on a woman?
- Part 11: How do you pick up beautiful women who play hard to get?
Learn From My Advanced Training Programs
- The Flow
- The Ultimate Guide to Conversation
- Mastery Methods & Mindsets
- Dating Power
- 21 Great Ways to Get a Girlfriend
- Confessions of a Natural
- Better Than a Bad Boy
- The Modern Relationship
- Coaching Call Breakthroughs
- Alpha Male Power
- Get Your Ex Back: Super System
Share Your Thoughts
If you enjoyed this video, have a question or want to comment on anything – PLEASE DON’T BE SHY. Go ahead and leave a comment below!
Want to Know the SECRET to Success With Women?
Watch this hidden video where Dan exposes his BIGGEST secret to success with women, which allows you to easily get laid or get a girlfriend.
This video is only available here and you can watch it for free right now.
Very Informative. Good advice for the impatient and it sorts out the rhetoric that comes with dating. One could say its not what she says but doesn’t say.
Hi Justin
Thanks for your comment.
Yes, another thing to note: Don’t LISTEN to everything a woman SAYS. Women will often say one thing and DO another. Especially in the case of escalating to sex. Read this article for more info:
http://www.themodernman.com/dating/sex/sex_talk_when_no_means_yes.html
Cheers
Dan
Hey I have a question. What is the best way to talk to a group of women? I have found it’s easier to keep a conversation with one girl than to entertain a group of girls that always seems to stick together.
Hey Tim
Thanks for your question.
It’s a complicated thing to answer in a comment reply, but basically:
1. If she is close friends with the people in her group, then you’ll need to address all of them initially and have a chat as a group. Once you’ve established yourself as a cool guy and added value and positive energy to the group, her friends will back off and let you chat more with the girl you like…OR, if you like a few of the girls in the group there is a way to get them to all begin competing against each other for you attention. Watch Dating Power for more info.
2. If she isn’t close with her group (e.g. after work drinks with colleagues / co-workers that she doesn’t really like anyway), it’s best to address everyone initially in a cool, easy-going way and then focus in on your girl. Then get alone with her away from the group, so she can open up and be herself.
I explain how to approach and hit up groups in Dating Power http://store.themodernman.com/products/dating_power.php and we give further examples in The Ultimate Guide to Conversation http://store.themodernman.com/products/the_ultimate_guide_to_conversation.php and 21 Great Ways to Get a Girlfriend (in the section on house parties) http://store.themodernman.com/products/21_great_ways_to_get_a_girlfriend.php
Cheers
Dan
Hi Dan,
My question is, How do you get a girl to like you in a nightclub where noise levels are higher, are there specific tactics for a club environment?
Davidson.
Hi Davidson
Thanks for your question.
Another complicated one to answer in a comment reply, but basically:
– NEVER, ever, ever worry about the conditions of the environment (i.e. too noisy, too many people, too hot, too cold, etc). Just focus on approaching and talking to women…EVERYTHING else (I repeat EVERYTHING else) is irrelevant.
If you EVER start worrying/complaining about the conditions of the environment, you will go into a state of mind that will put you off approaching. Just IGNORE all of that and approach.
– In clubs, you need to focus more on smiling, having sexual body language, making good eye contact, using “Power Moves” and escalating to kissing. All of this is demonstrated on stage in Dating Power: http://store.themodernman.com/products/dating_power.php
– Don’t worry about trying to TALK a lot with the woman/women. Just have fun, use good body language and escalate.
These days, clubs are my FAVORITE place to pick up. I used to HATE them because of the noise levels, but now that I know how to do it – I LOVE IT. So easy to pick up hotties in clubs when you know what you’re doing.
Cheers
Dan
I’ve noticed that some women make comments to me about how much they weigh or that they think they need to lose weight (and they get specific quite often), or maybe that they feel ugly since they aren’t wearing make-up. What are the implications of this? Thanks
Hi Johann
Thanks for your question.
Check out the article I wrote on that topic here: http://www.themodernman.com/dating/relationships/should_you_always_be_honest_with_a_woman.html
Cheers
Dan
Could you make a comment regarding being stern with women? Once in a long while I really let a woman know what I’m thinking but without raising my voice. Thanks
Hi Johann
Thanks for your comment and question.
Yes, it is definitely important as long it is done in a loving way, rather than you losing control of your emotions and becoming unnecessarily angry. In approx. 1 month, we will be releasing a recent video of me doing a talk about Relationships at a seminar in Sydney. One of the things I explain is how to be stern with women in a way that keeps you in the “one up” position in terms of dominance when in a relationship. Keep an eye on your e-mails for the announcement.
Cheers
Dan
Hi Mr.Bacon (still doing this ^^)
These Dating Advices are really good, thanks for uploading them and keep doing it.
I had the worst night tonight.
I went out with the girl I’m attracted to tonight with a couple of common friends for a nice dinner. I acidenlty put this charmfull guy next to her at dinner while I was placed diogonly. I’ve ask her before if she’s looking for some other guys than me but she said she didnt and I also said it would hurt me if she was with someother guy. However, I notcied this guy started flirting with her and she fell for it. He was pretty cool and made the right moves, didn’t pay much attention to her.
Later that night we went out clubbing and while I was hanging around I saw her suddenly kissed his neck and later on the dancefloor making out with him. So, I got hurt and went away beacause they were closing soon. So I waited outside instead beacuse we live in the same area of the town, so I would get some company home. But I never saw them, I must missed em.
So I texted her ‘thanks for the company home’ which she repleid ‘but you were’nt around :P’.
I know I’m a handsome guy, but there’s seems to be somekind of problem, not enough attraction.
Seems you can’t trust women at all.
So I’m not going to take contact with her for awhile.
I really need some advice.
I’m really hurt. You’re lighting my day Dan, thanks.
Hi Stuart
Thanks for your positive feedback and question.
This is EXACTLY what I’m talking about when I tell guys that they’ll be slammed further into the friend zone if they don’t escalate to kissing and sex. All if EVER takes is another guy to come along and escalate to kissing and sex and you are GONE…out of the picture…just a friend.
…and yes, as you’ve experienced – it HURTS.
Stuart, you need to learn how to escalate otherwise you’ll be rejected and tossed aside like that again and again throughout your life. You need to learn how to get out of the friend zone by escalating to kissing and sex. NO AMOUNT of talking and hanging out will EVER come close to a kiss. The first kiss changes things from being FRIENDLY to being SEXUAL and removes you from the friend zone. If you’re being friendly with her, you’re a friend. If you’re being sexual with her, you’re a boyfriend.
You said, “He was pretty cool and made the right moves…” why didn’t you make the right moves? What have you been waiting for? I recommend you watch Dating Power immediately. We provide tested, rejection proof techniques for moving in for the first kiss as well as explaining the 8 signs that show you a woman is ready to be kissed.
Cheers
Dan
Hey dan
great stuff my bud, i hsvent read your book as i am far away in africa zimbabwe but id just like to know.. how do i start a convo with a girl where the intent is to end up kissing her etc. i have lots of girlfriends but i’ve only kissed some of them because they like me and not because im the modern man..please help a brother out.. thanks
Hey Ted
Thanks for your question.
If you want the conversation to lead to kissing and sex, you need to make sure you ATTRACT the woman initially rather than trying to become her friend first and then hope that something happens. The golden rule: Don’t act like a friend and you won’t be seen as one. The next time you’re out at a bar or party, watch the guys who are good with women – you’ll see that they aren’t trying to become the woman’s friend. Instead, they are flirting and creating a sexual vibe between themselves and the woman, while also being friendly and easy-going with her.
Also, I give a free technique on moving in for a kiss in the sample video of Dating Power.
Cheers
Dan
There is a girl I like in church. How do I start a conversation with her? She is always around her friends. How do I pull her away from the crowd?
Hi Daniel
Thanks for your question.
It is easy to start conversations with women when you are NOT trying to pick them up. If you approach women and try to sneakily pick them up and “pull her away from the crowd” as you said, it will feel difficult because you will know that you’re scheming. Instead, go over and be social with her and anyone else there. Display the traits that women find attractive (confidence, masculinity, humor, etc) and she will be attracted.
I recommend you listen to The Ultimate Guide to Conversation and learn how to make women attracted to you and fall in love with you during conversation. We teach a natural style of interacting with women, without all the tacky pick up tricks.
Cheers
Dan
There is this girl who is younger than I am. I love this girl but she seems to reject my attentions. When I text her, she says that I am bothering her and to stop or else. recently I texted her that I loved her and I complimented her on her new shoes and told her that the shoes made her feet more beautiful. She told me to stop bothering her. I immediately apologized and told her that I was sorry and that I would never do it again. Her answer: “Okay, it better be so, LOL.” In any other conversations she answers well and converses well but if I try to tell her that I love she changes the conversations or gets angry. What do I do?
sincerely.
Flores
Hi Dan,
I met this woman i like we see each other everyday for the past 2 months,we work at the same building but different floors,we both will be waiting for the lift with few others office workers,but this particular woman does not get into the lift when she sees me, this has happened a fewtimes.I think she does not like me.Kindly advice.
Thank You.
Best Regards
John
Hi John
Nothing will happen if you continue living in fantasy land where you imagine what might happen or what she might be thinking. Approach her and follow The Flow. She will either show you that she is attracted (in which case proceed through the steps of The Flow) or she is not. If she isn’t, there is no harm done. All you did was talk to her.
Cheers
Dan
Girls don’t always ‘play mind games’ to see weather the guy likes her. It’s also to see how strong their social status is, right?
Thanks, Kim.
Hi Kim
Yes.
Playing hard to get quickly shows a woman how desperate a man is.
Cheers
Dan
Hi Dan,
So if your at a bar that has some pools tables. Is it worthwhile to ask a women to play pool upon initially meeting her? And if so are there some body language tips or other attraction methods to build up attraction during a the game?
Jake
Hi Jake
Thanks for your question.
Yes, that is a great way to break the ice. I’ve used that approach many times and it always goes well. The body language you should use is demonstrated in Alpha Male Power.
Cheers
Dan
Hey Dan,
Really enjoyed the video, it really shows how to understand women better. I was wondering how do advise dealing with competition from other guys on a girl you want? How do you prove to be the best choice?
Thanks
Hi Austin
Thanks for the positive feedback.
Other guys aren’t competition when you make a woman feel intense sexual attraction for you. Read The Flow to learn how to do that.
Cheers
Dan
Dear Dan I struggle to get this girl to like me again I don’t know what happen she was the first one to come to me but as soon as I made a move she withdrawn back,what did I do wrong help please,just recently I text some inspirational mssg she told me she is lazy to read it,I’m pissed off by her I think I should delete her number nd have nothing to do with her
Hi Edward
Thanks for your question.
Texting inspirational messages is not what attracts or excites women. Read The Flow and learn how to talk to women in person, on the phone and via text. Note: There aren’t many examples of texts, but the phone call examples can be used for text and Facebook messages. You’ll know what I mean when you read the book – at the moment, you just don’t understand how to talk to women in an attractive way. Once you do, it won’t matter if you’re talking via text, phone, Facebook or in person – women will love talking/chatting with you.
Cheers
Dan
Hey Dan, advice please. I like this girl she likes me I know, but then she tries to come across as if I’m her friend. I don’t want to be put in that situation I want to escalate things more I’m at her place just hanging out tonight but it’s all neutral. What do you think because I kinda feel like I’m holding back. What do you think?
Hey Jordan
Thanks for your question.
Exactly…YOU are holding back. Remember, you are the man and she is the woman. You lead, she follows. If you don’t know how to escalate to kissing and sex in a way that ensures you won’t be rejected, I recommend you watch Dating Power: http://store.themodernman.com/in/ff7fdd
Cheers
Dan