• patrick s

  Wife is with another man after the separation, been a month or two. She now tells me that she misses me she loves me and would love to get back together but still scared and hurt, she feel safe with this other man what do I do we spend a lot of time together on the phone and in person when he’s not around when he’s around I don’t exist.

  • Dan Bacon

    Hey Patrick

    Thanks for your question.

    Sorry to hear about the separation and your wife being with another man now. That must be a tough thing to be going through.

    The first thing to tell you is that chatting to her on the phone like you have been is not going to get her back properly. In fact, it often just makes the other look more attractive to you. You end up becoming the SOURCE of the sexual tension between her and him. If you don’t know how sexual tension works: Sexual tension happens when there is attraction between a man and woman, but there is an obstacle preventing them from having sex (e.g. the farmer’s daughter is flirting with a farmhand worker, but the farmer is protective of his daughter. The steal glances at each other and the sexual tension builds).

    You need to make your wife feel respect and sexual attraction for you. Being her “friend on the phone” isn’t going to make that happen. At the moment, you’d only be making her feel special because she’s got two men who want her. However, that doesn’t draw her to YOU, it draws her to him. You need to stop using the approach you are using. I can only imagine how horrible it makes you feel to hear your wife talking about being with another man. You’ve got to stop doing it and start doing the things that will draw her back to you. If you want to learn how to do that, let me help you. Watch my video program Get Your Ex Back: Super System and you know exactly what to do and say to get her back with you.

    Cheers
    Dan

• Vee

  Hello, I will try to make this quick. I seen my ex rescently out and we ended up hanging out for a while, I broke up with her three years ago. I asked if she would like to catch up for a lunch, we met and we ended up drinking rather than eating for six hours, I no that she has been seeing someone but it never came up when we went out, I kept it real lite and sweet.. I think that we had a great time together and we hav been texting each other but it seems that I initiate everytine. She responds quickly but I feel like I should see if she reaches out? Do u agree with me waiting on her to reach out?
  Thank you for your time!!!
  V

  • Dan Bacon

    Hey Vee

    Thanks for your question.

    Whether you text or she texts first is fairly unimportant, compared to what really matters. If you’re focused on texting, then you simply don’t know what really matters in terms of getting her back. If you need to learn (it sounds like you definitely do), my program is there for you.

    Keeping things “light and sweet” is not the answer either. You should have escalated to kissing and sex and then done a really good job of that, as I teach in my program Ultimate Make Up Sex.

    Cheers
    Dan

• Ronan

  Hello,

  I am writing to get your valuable advice. I’m separated from my wife for 5 months now and really want to get back with my wife and two young sons. I have been emotionally detached from my wife for quite some time and she told me that she wasn’t attracted to me or in love with anymore. I closed a business last year and found it difficult to get back to work and so wasn’t contributing financially to the household. I recognise that my wife lost respect for me as you stated in your video. We are going to counselling but she doesn’t want to reconciled our marriage and only wants to talk about a structure for me to visit our boys in her house. Can I win her respect, attraction and love back? I have told her that I still love her and want to be a complete family again but she is not interested. She will get a legal separation as the next step if I don’t stop requesting reconciling our marriage. What should I do?

  Feeling lost.
  Ronan.

  • Dan Bacon

    Hey Ronan

    Thanks for your question.

    Definitely. You’ve got to step right into action with this. I hate to hear about marriages that are on the rocks and the guy is wondering whether or not he should get my program. Get it, watch it and put it into action immediately. If you don’t do what I suggest in the program, don’t be surprised if she finds herself a new man soon and destroys your confidence.

    BTW: Counsellors are usually useless for keeping a marriage together in these circumstances. I’ve spoken to 100s of guys via my phone coaching http://www.themodernman.com/phone_coaching.html who say that the counsellor actually make things worse, by making it all his fault, rather than the fault of the husband and wife. Essentially, you need to shock your wife back into loving you and feeling attraction for you and that is what my system will show you how to do.

    Cheers
    Dan

• Winston

  Hi Dan,

  My ex girlfriend broke up with me, saying her feeling has faded since we always got into quarrels and arguments, and i always made her cry. We had been together for one and six months, and we broke up on 10 November.
  Since then, i had no contact with her for 2 weeks and reflected on myself, improve on my temper and my characteristics, i’m willing to change and do anything for her.
  I have been texting her after our break up, but she will just ignore me or she will tell me to move on. She blocked me from messaging her, Phone calls and all social networks.
  Just recently, she said text me saying “You will find someone better”, so i actually gave her a surprise visit, hugged her and cried. She explained to me that she loved me last time, but, she got no love feeling for me anymore and she chased me away.
  After i left her house, she actually asked her best friend for advise on what could she do. Her friend advise was to give it a try to see if the feeling can be salvaged by within this few hours of hanging out. So she tried to had a lunch with me and hangout for 2 hours. After the lunch, she told me to leave her alone. The next day, she text me saying,”I tried to find back the love feeling, but, i couldn’t.”
  Her best friend later text me saying that my ex-girlfriend stand firm on saying that she totally got no feeling for me anymore and do not even want to try to get back to me.
  I’m totally devastated.
  Christmas is approaching, i wanted to make a Doraemon Dream House (She always wanted to) in her bed room for her, as a gesture.
  I’m not really sure what to do.
  Please advise me. Thank you!

  Warm regards,
  Winston Wong

  • Dan Bacon

    Hey Winston

    Thanks for your question.

    She has no feelings for you, so you then go and CRY in her arms and now want to build her a little toy house in her room? Honestly mate, you sound like a girl. The reason she no longer feels attraction for you is that (by the sound of it), there’s hardly any masculinity to you. Women are attracted to the masculinity and emotional strength of men, not the weakness.

    Read: http://www.themodernman.com/relationship/is-it-okay-for-men-to-cry.html

    Also, don’t waste your money on a stupid doll house for her. Invest in yourself and become more of a man by getting my program. Why waste your money on silly junk that isn’t going to change YOU one bit? It is YOU she broke up with, so fix YOU, not a doll house. Getting this comment from you reminds me of how silly I used to be when I had no idea about masculinity and being a man. Read: http://www.themodernman.com/success/how-to-be-a-man.html

    Cheers
    Dan

• Chirs

  Dear Mr. Dan,

  We are in relationship since 7 months even never we doesn’t have sex, she is chatting with me very rarely, when she have hard time then she asking me to help or suggestion, if she is happy she is not talking with me and she if I text her she not replying me, when we being in love she crazy with me. Slowly she day by day she refusing me. But now I am really crazy event I can’t work I am totally stuck every day we seen each other we are working together even she is not greetings me always I am the one greetings her just she replying even she doesn’t look my eyes. The reason she saying me we are working together that’s why she don’t want relationship she want to make boy friend from outside etc.
  I have spend much money when she had hard time, and she was using my phone and number as well now days she telling me to get your phone like that I told her I don’t need this I give gift from my heart. Nowadays she delete from black berry messenger and even she is using new number. I brought her some clothes she is wearing always.
  I have been in holidays for month once I back to office even she dint ask me how is your holidays etc.
  In this Christmas I have purchase gift for her rose red wine chocolates and Christmas greetings card I ask her I have small Christmas gift I will come to night in your home she agreed. I went her home but mobile switch off I wait 2 hour no response. Then I came back home my heart totally break.
  I took this gift pictures and I send her in face book this was gift for you I went there your home and waited but no response then she replied me please do not disturb me and Please stop !!!
  I reply I am not disturb you I brought gift for you with deep love and respect I always respect her and love her much.
  She reply me (I don’t need anything this message I m receiving last or else I will block in face book.
  Now i am totally stuck I can’t do work plan nothing I don’t want to met with other friends I want to stay alone drinking alcohol and I am always reading her message pictures etc it so really hard for me.
  Now I am planning to end form this company and join other company its work to get back her in my life. Please advise

  • Dan Bacon

    Hey Chris

    Thanks for your comment.

    Man, you are the classic example of a guy who gets controlled by a woman. You’re buying her stuff, declaring your love to her and she’s practically spitting in your face. You need to stop being a little dog for her to pull around on a leash and to sit when she commands it.

    Read:
    http://www.themodernman.com/dating/relationships/who-should-wear-the-pants-in-a-relationship.html
    http://www.themodernman.com/success/how-to-be-a-man.html

    Cheers
    Dan

• Kyle Ellis

  Hey Dan,

  I’ve recently broke up with my girlfriend of one and a half years. She said that she just doesn’t feel the same way anymore. So I went No Contact. Its only been just over a week since the breakup. I saw your video about how no contact doesn’t work. So can you help me get her back? I’ve already been through that begging/needy stage and like you said I regretted it instantly. Oh and also I found out she is starting to see another guy, this crushed me when I found out. Is there still away to get her back? Hope you can help. Thanks

  • Dan Bacon

    Hey Kyle

    Thanks for your question.

    The answer is: Of course! That is what the whole system is about. A woman who breaks up with a man no longer feels the same way about him – that is standard. However, what a lot of guys don’t realize is that they can reignite the woman’s feelings and that is where my system comes into it.

    Don’t waste another day Kyle – in your case, it will likely take a few days to a couple of weeks to properly get her back, so get started now.

    Cheers
    Dan

• David

  Hi,

  Just need some advice.. So me (30) and the ex (26) met about a year ago and fell in love.. After about four months she confessed to me she lied about having kids (she has two) so i broke up with her. Five months later we reconciled and things were great, after 4 months she broke up with me saying she lost feelings over the last month (i had deaths in the family and issues at work which got me depressed and i was drinking too much).. After 3 weeks nc, she contacted me saying she missed me and that just to give her time to get her shit together ( 2 kids, no job, no car, bipolar) and that she could see us together in the future.. I gave her space occasionally saying hi. About two months later i asked her out and she told me to move on, that we could be friends, that the connection wasn’t there the last month we were together and that if it was meant to be the connection would have never been lost.. I was heartbroken and pleaded and begged.. I found out a couple days later that she has been seeing this guy for the past two months.. Basically a month and a half after we broke up..we have texted a coupe times since (me always initiating).. I haven’t talked to her in a week.. I checked out her instagram and her profile pic is of her kissing her new beau and they always post shit saying how happy and in love they are.. I really love this girl, but it seems she gave up on us.. Any advice would be helpful..

  • Dan Bacon

    Hey David

    Thanks for your comment.

    In your case, you will need to get her respect back first (you lost it with the begging and pleading) and then get her attracted to you again. You need to either improve yourself and become a better man than the other guy or pick up a woman who is hotter than her so you can make her jealous. If you don’t want to do those things, I have several other techniques and approaches that I outline in my system: http://www.themodernman.com/videos/get-your-ex-back-super-system.html

    Cheers
    Dan

• Huw

  Hi Dan
  My gf of 2 years has just broken off our relationship, giving me no closure. She is using no contact system.
  We have split four times prior, me instigating this, as my ex-wife has been controlling me with access to my children ie “if Nikki is around this weekend, you won’t be seeing the kids”. My gf has offered for me to move in with her twice in the past; I’ve backed out at the last minute, afraid of the trouble it will cause with my kids contact. I have been standing up for myself of late, and not leeting my ex-wife control me; so I have changed there. I have asked my gf to move in with her, and told her I want a long-term future with her. I probably came on too strong, she became overwhelmed, and said she had to think about it, and to leave her alone whilst doing so. In the middle of this, she’s started a new job, spending a lot of time in the car each day with her nee boss, who’s ten years younger than me. She is really dressing to impress and acting quite flirty around him. Suddenly, after two years of being besotted with me, she starts to criticise me: “you’re not very socialable” and “I had to lower my sex-drive for you”. She becomes distant, evasive and not wanting to spend any time together. Basically becoming a totally different girl in the space of 3 to 4 weeks, when she started her new job. I’ve fallen into all the pitfalls: become frustrated at her rejection of me, and said a few things I shouldn’t; then become pathetic, clingy and begging her to speak to me.
  Thing is, we were inseperable before and had a good thing going, both well into each other. Main issue was she was down the pecking order with me bowing to my ex-wife’s demands. I changed that, and showed Nikki I was considering her feelings more, and putting her first. Help! I’m really positive we can get back on track!

  • Dan Bacon

    Hi Huw

    Thanks for your comment.

    You’ve got to get her respect and attraction back first. At the moment, it sounds like she has lost a fair bit of respect for you as a man. If you try to get back with her without addressing that first, she will just keep messing you around.

    Her telling you not to contact her while she is thinking about whether or not to get back together means that she is on the look out for a new man. When a woman wants to get back with a man, she doesn’t say, “Give me space” and instead says, “I want to see you!”

    You’ve got to focus on regaining her respect and attraction, before attempting to get the relationship back together. My system provides the instructions and techniques for that: http://store.themodernman.com/get_your_ex_back_super_system.html

    Cheers
    Dan

• Corey

  Dan,

  I’ve was with my ex for 8 months, and we were completely and totally in love. Then one day last week she broke up with me out of the blue and said she needed time for herself. I know now after watching the videos here that I had seen all the signs, I just hadn’t known what they meant. I’m am still completely and totally in love with her, and she knows that. I believe that she is the one for me. However, I stupidly did everything i could have possibly done wrong. I begged and pleaded for her to take me back and give me another shot, I got really emotional, and really desperate. I know now that I’ve lost her respect as a man because she told me last night that she loves me but isn’t in love with me, and feels our relationship isn’t right (even though a month ago she told me I am the love of her life, and that I’ve been the best man she’s ever been with). We are both college students, and around the same age (she’s 20 and I’m 21). I don’t want to lose her. She is the most amazing, beautiful, loving woman I’ve ever met. How can I go about finding a way to get her interested again? I know I need to change myself and fix the issues we had; She just won’t tell me what they were. I’m willing to do anything to fix this relationship and get her back.

  Another side note; All of her ex’s were really abusive towards her, her last one being the worst. He was physically, emotionally, and verbally abusive and cheated on her multiple times. She gave him multiple chances, but won’t give me the time of day.

  I understand that your system works, but there’s no way I could buy it, being a broke college kid and all. However I would like you to point me in the right direction so I can start to repair things between us.

  Regards,
  Corey.

  • Dan Bacon

    Hey Corey

    Thanks for your question.

    Man, it’s tough to help guys like you via comments because what you really need to do is go through my 10 hour video program so you can learn what you need to learn. It’s hard to help you with this complex topic without giving you a proper education.

    However, I will try anyway. Start by reading through these articles and watching any of the videos on the pages:
    http://www.themodernman.com/dating/relationships/my-girlfriend-said-she-needs-space.html
    http://www.themodernman.com/relationship/why-do-women-want-to-feel-protected-by-their-man.html
    http://www.themodernman.com/dating/relationships/who-should-wear-the-pants-in-a-relationship.html
    http://www.themodernman.com/blog/do-men-need-toughening-up.html
    http://www.themodernman.com/success/finding-your-life-purpose.html
    http://www.themodernman.com/videos/what-is-your-skill-level-with-women.html

    Cheers
    Dan

• Sundeep

  Hello Dan

  My fiance is now back with me. Thank you from the bottom of my heart for making this system a reality for us men. I thought I had lost the love of my life. It destroyed me as a man and was about to lose my job because I wasn’t concentrating and was making mistakes. Your advice picked me back up, got me to focus clearly and I got her back by being the strong man I should have been all along.

  It has been the most important thing in my life to get her back. It is highly shameful among my family to divorce or break up so you can imagine how sick I was feeling about it. To say that I am relieved and happy is an understatement.

  Best regards to you and the team there at The Modern Man,

  Sundeep

  • Dan Bacon

    Hi Sundeep

    Mate, I am honored to have been able to help you.

    Congratulations on getting her back! I hope you have a wonderful wedding and future with your soon-to-be-bride!

    Cheers
    Dan

• Devon

  Hi Dan.
  My girlfriend of a year and six months just recently told me she needs time and space. We have a child together who is eight months old. I text her all the time and she ignores me. The only time she will respond is if I text her about the baby. I spoke to her in person and she said she loves me and wants to be with me but needs time and space. What should I do? Our relationship was pretty good up until 3 days ago. I love the girl to death and really wanna make this work.

  • Dan Bacon

    Hey Devon

    Thanks for your question.

    What you need to do is make her feel respect and attraction for you in ways that she has never experienced before. This requires that you use a different approach with your communication style around her. All of the examples of what to say and do are provided in my program: http://store.themodernman.com/get_your_ex_back_super_system.html

    Giving her space is not the answer. You’ve got to make her feel the way she wants to feel with a man. Space doesn’t do that.

    Cheers
    Dan

• Dan

  I was dating a girl for a year but on New Years’s eve went out with my guy friends and didn’t tell her when she called that night. Just told her I was going out. I wasn’t trying to be sneaky of not telling her. I did not do anything with any women that night. I realize I didn’t make plans with her either. One of my best friend, was permanently moving which is why I went out. what should I do? I felt she was distant towards me so I made plans with her MLK but she was sick and later that week I saw her post pics going out with her girlfriends from work. I text her asking if I did anything wrong and she said no. She been stress from work and being sick. Last week I left vm saying she is being distant towards since new years eve, and wanted to make plans with her on valentines day. She didn’t respond so I applied the no contact rule since last week.

  • Dan Bacon

    Hey Dan

    Thanks for your question.

    Essentially, you need to stop trying to play any games (i.e. No Contact Rule) and stop overthinking things. Just focus on being attractive to her and she will be drawn to you. Watch this:
    http://www.themodernman.com/blog/how-to-make-a-woman-feel-intense-attraction-for-you.html

    Cheers
    Dan

• Bradley

  Hey dan
  My girlfriend for a year broke up with me a week ago. She says she needs to find love within herself again. We were on a distance relationship and i gave it my all to see her, she just didnt meet in the middle for a while. so i let her know in a couple different ways. She broke up with me and for four days i called trying to get her back. She answered but refused. Am i too late? did i make a mistake for calling? Today i texted her my last message that what i had was true and that i was giving her space. What should i Do?

  • Dan Bacon

    Hey Bradley

    Thanks for your question.

    What you need to do is follow a step by step plan to get her back. It’s not something that I can quickly teach you in a reply to a comment. My system is 10 hours of video because there is a lot that you need to learn before you will understand exactly what you need to say and do when you next talk to her on the phone.

    It’s so easy for guys to make mistakes and turn the woman off further. You need to get the right mindsets first or else you will call her and naturally say the wrong things. Here is where you can purchase my tested, proven to work system:
    http://store.themodernman.com/get_your_ex_back_super_system.html

    Cheers
    Dan

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